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  1. ECP

    If You Must Get an MRI, Would You Opt for Full Sedation?

    My doctors keep encouraging me to have an MRI, but I keep refusing because I am very worried about a catastrophic setback that could lead to a significant increase in noxacusis, tinnitus, and hearing loss. They have told me I could be fully sedated for the MRI if I choose. They explained that I...
  2. ECP

    Hi, I came back to the boards today after a two-month absence caused by depression. I'm still...

    Hi, I came back to the boards today after a two-month absence caused by depression. I'm still dealing with ear symptoms daily. How are you doing?
  3. ECP

    Thank you @MindOverMatter. I will try to reframe things in my mind after a good night's sleep...

    Thank you @MindOverMatter. I will try to reframe things in my mind after a good night's sleep. I'm just especially depressed right now because it's the 24-month mark and some bad stuff happened last week that I wrote about in the suicide thread. :( Anyway, I appreciate your kindness very much.
  4. ECP

    @MindOverMatter And another old friend emailed me over the summer to say hi. I have yet to...

    @MindOverMatter And another old friend emailed me over the summer to say hi. I have yet to respond because the thought of telling him about my ear injury triggers my PTSD. I realized today that I don't have to tell him about it, and a weight lifted from my shoulders. He lives thousands of miles...
  5. ECP

    @MindOverMatter I also feel like I'm going to be a burden socially. I told 4 friends in a group...

    @MindOverMatter I also feel like I'm going to be a burden socially. I told 4 friends in a group email how I've been doing, and now they're talking about us all getting together when I'm up for it. I'm afraid to explain to them that no matter how quiet they are, and no matter how quiet the venue...
  6. ECP

    Thank you @MindOverMatter. It's not that I don't find joy in anything--my issue is feeling...

    Thank you @MindOverMatter. It's not that I don't find joy in anything--my issue is feeling socially uncomfortable around healthy people who knew me when I was healthy and who are now going to feel awkward when they find out how sick I became. I feel inauthentic when I downplay how bad it is, but...
  7. ECP

    Based on my memory of that, I can relate to them, but they can no longer relate to me, now that...

    Based on my memory of that, I can relate to them, but they can no longer relate to me, now that T and H have fundamentally changed my life.
  8. ECP

    At this point, I feel like I have nothing in common with healthy people, other than a memory of...

    At this point, I feel like I have nothing in common with healthy people, other than a memory of what it was like to be healthy.
  9. ECP

    I'm tempted to be honest and say, "I have done nothing in the past 24 months except try to get...

    I'm tempted to be honest and say, "I have done nothing in the past 24 months except try to get well." But that would make them sad.
  10. ECP

    nothing to say. Like, they have no freaking idea how T and H will impact every aspect of your...

    nothing to say. Like, they have no freaking idea how T and H will impact every aspect of your existence: hobbies, jobs, social life.
  11. ECP

    I tell them about my incurable ear problems, and then when they say, "What else is going on?", I...

    I tell them about my incurable ear problems, and then when they say, "What else is going on?", I feel even worse because I have
  12. ECP

    Does anyone else find it triggering to catch up with old friends who have yet to hear about your...

    Does anyone else find it triggering to catch up with old friends who have yet to hear about your T or H? I feel like a Debbie Downer when
  13. ECP

    Yes, I've had a CT scan.

    Yes, I've had a CT scan.
  14. ECP

    I have not improved that much in 24 months. On a scale of 1 to 10 where 10 was the original...

    I have not improved that much in 24 months. On a scale of 1 to 10 where 10 was the original severity, I feel like a 7. You're probably wasting your time asking me for so much advice. :(
  15. ECP

    I don't go out with my husband as much as I used to. If I'm not feeling up to it, I stay home...

    I don't go out with my husband as much as I used to. If I'm not feeling up to it, I stay home. It's not worth a setback. I will eat at a restaurant only if they aren't playing music and it's not crowded.
  16. ECP

    I don't wear ear protection 24/7. I've slowly reintroduced sounds in the past 2 years. However...

    I don't wear ear protection 24/7. I've slowly reintroduced sounds in the past 2 years. However, my husband vacuums our apartment only when I am at the supermarket, and he uses the coffee grinder only when I am upstairs with the door closed.
  17. ECP

    I would wear earmuffs or earplugs when the sound of rainfall was painful.

    I would wear earmuffs or earplugs when the sound of rainfall was painful.
  18. ECP

    It helped only with depression. It didn't make the tinnitus more tolerable, and it didn't...

    It helped only with depression. It didn't make the tinnitus more tolerable, and it didn't improve the ear pain. The ear pain was improved only by staying home as much as possible and by wearing ear protection when necessary.
  19. ECP

    No, I used it for 9 months and stopped. If I ever go back on an antidepressant, it will probably...

    No, I used it for 9 months and stopped. If I ever go back on an antidepressant, it will probably be clomipramine or nortriptyline, since they have helped some people with ear pain.
  20. ECP

    I never tried it and I doubt I ever will. The ear pain is too severe. If I only had tinnitus, I...

    I never tried it and I doubt I ever will. The ear pain is too severe. If I only had tinnitus, I would have tried it.
  21. ECP

    No, I never got one, but I might have to someday as a last resort.

    No, I never got one, but I might have to someday as a last resort.
  22. ECP

    For what it's worth, I read somewhere that a water lily has roots in muddy water. It can't...

    For what it's worth, I read somewhere that a water lily has roots in muddy water. It can't blossom until it grows tall enough to break the surface of the water. The mud fertilizes the water lily plant, and ultimately that mud is what makes the plant grow tall enough to transcend the water and...
  23. ECP

    I still fall into the Mariana Trench sometimes. Quiet hobbies and distractions help because they...

    I still fall into the Mariana Trench sometimes. Quiet hobbies and distractions help because they keep my mind from thinking about my problems. It's a conundrum, though, because the worse my symptoms are, the harder it is to distract myself and feel like I'm climbing out of the trench. Then I get...
  24. ECP

    My tinnitus used to be much louder and more reactive. There were also many more different sounds...

    My tinnitus used to be much louder and more reactive. There were also many more different sounds that changed throughout the day. My pain level and brain fog and depression were also much worse. I still have all these symptoms, just at a lower level. The improvement isn't obvious from one day to...
  25. ECP

    Perhaps in a few months, you will also look back and realize that while your symptoms went up...

    Perhaps in a few months, you will also look back and realize that while your symptoms went up and down from day to day, that overall you are getting better. You said earlier that you feel like you're in the Mariana Trench. As we say in America, if a situation is the worst it can be, "There is...
  26. ECP

    I've worked from home for many years. I stopped working almost completely after the injury, but...

    I've worked from home for many years. I stopped working almost completely after the injury, but I am gradually becoming more productive now. Everyone says that the healing process is non-linear. I've had improvement followed by worsening followed by more improvement. It's discouraging, but I am...
  27. ECP

    The initial cause is a long story to tell, but you can find it under my profile as the very...

    The initial cause is a long story to tell, but you can find it under my profile as the very first posting I made. An urgent-care doctor gave me some prednisone pills exactly 2 weeks after the injury, but they didn't help. I probably should've sought treatment immediately instead of waiting 2 weeks.
  28. ECP

    Two years into this, I am able to go out for reasons other than grocery shopping. I just have to...

    Two years into this, I am able to go out for reasons other than grocery shopping. I just have to be selective about where and when and how long. You may also reach that point if you hang on long enough. I remember my first four months were the worst.
  29. ECP

    I hope your symptoms get better soon. Although it may not give you much comfort, many people do...

    I hope your symptoms get better soon. Although it may not give you much comfort, many people do get better with time. It's just that the first few months are the worst and the most surreal.
  30. ECP

    What does ACRN stand for?

    What does ACRN stand for?
  31. ECP

    I know that feeling all too well. I spend much of my day trying to find little things I can do...

    I know that feeling all too well. I spend much of my day trying to find little things I can do to stay productive, or at least distracted. I shudder to think how much I could have accomplished in the past two years, were it not for the ear injury.
  32. ECP

    It could be either of those things, but I believe the quiet kind is more likely to be perceived...

    It could be either of those things, but I believe the quiet kind is more likely to be perceived as mild. Stability helps too. When mine is both loud and reactive, it's harder to ignore.
  33. ECP

    @2049v Fans and AC noises cause pain for me, and it sometimes makes my tinnitus louder...

    @2049v Fans and AC noises cause pain for me, and it sometimes makes my tinnitus louder afterward. I've spent all summer wearing earmuffs while running the AC at home.
  34. ECP

    That's a tough situation. :( Does your school by chance have one of those HR programs where...

    That's a tough situation. :( Does your school by chance have one of those HR programs where employees can donate their unused sick days and vacation days to employees who need extra time off for medical reasons?
  35. ECP

    The only positive thing I have to say is that summer is over, which means there will be no more...

    The only positive thing I have to say is that summer is over, which means there will be no more AC noise for another 8 or 9 months.
  36. ECP

    The same for my keyboard and sheet music collection. Keep= living in denial. Donate= defeat.

    The same for my keyboard and sheet music collection. Keep= living in denial. Donate= defeat.
  37. ECP

    If I donate my hairdryer to Goodwill, it means I'm a pessimist. If I keep my hairdryer, it means...

    If I donate my hairdryer to Goodwill, it means I'm a pessimist. If I keep my hairdryer, it means I'm delusional about my sound tolerance.
  38. ECP

    So sorry to hear that. Are you completely out of sick days/sick leave/disability?

    So sorry to hear that. Are you completely out of sick days/sick leave/disability?
  39. ECP

    Suicidal

    I’m feeling incredibly triggered right now. The middle-aged granddaughter of the woman who caused my ear injury had the audacity to send me a text message. When I clicked on it, it was just a JPG of her grandmother’s funeral announcement. There was no personalized message, just the image, so I...
  40. ECP

    Tinnitus Increasing in Response to External Sounds

    I'm really sorry to hear that. Many people on Tinnitus Talk experience the type of tinnitus you're describing. While it may not have an official name, most here refer to it as "reactive tinnitus" because it becomes louder or changes pitch in response to real-world sounds. I recommend searching...
  41. ECP

    That's the socially awkward part of chronic illness. I find myself avoiding people because I...

    That's the socially awkward part of chronic illness. I find myself avoiding people because I don't want them to ask what I've been up to. If I were brutally honest about how miserable I've been, they'd be taken aback, but if I pretended to be okay, I'd feel inauthentic. At least here, we can be...
  42. ECP

    I had a CT scan in July. It was very quiet and didn't affect T or H at all. I know it's a lot...

    I had a CT scan in July. It was very quiet and didn't affect T or H at all. I know it's a lot of radiation, but for me, it was the lesser of two evils, the other evil being the amount of noise that an MRI would make.
  43. ECP

    Sorry to hear that. May I ask how you define "deep" earplugs? Like, can you tell us what brand...

    Sorry to hear that. May I ask how you define "deep" earplugs? Like, can you tell us what brand and model you consider to be too deep, or can you tell us how many inches or cm you consider too deep? I've only worn foam earplugs, and I'm beginning to shop around for musician's earplugs as an...
  44. ECP

    I still have musical tinnitus sometimes. :( The longest I've ever been pain-free was about 2...

    I still have musical tinnitus sometimes. :( The longest I've ever been pain-free was about 2 weeks. :(
  45. ECP

    I can work from home, but just barely. Brain fog and pain and anxiety get in the way of being...

    I can work from home, but just barely. Brain fog and pain and anxiety get in the way of being productive sometimes. I can go without earplugs at home, except when in the kitchen and when the garbage truck and landscapers are outside. I hate my life.
  46. ECP

    My Pain Hyperacusis and PTSD Testimony — Asking for Some Words of Encouragement to Carry On

    Is it possible to hire a lawyer to reopen your French social security accident claim and a private investigator to find out if your former employer is breaking any laws right now? You deserve justice. In the meantime, please keep prioritizing your self-care. I hope your new medication helps...
  47. ECP

    My Pain Hyperacusis and PTSD Testimony — Asking for Some Words of Encouragement to Carry On

    I am appalled and heartbroken by the way your employer and coworkers treated you. If I could punish them on your behalf, I would. I also have noxacusis and tinnitus caused by a work-related situation that went completely unacknowledged by the people who were aware of it, and it has haunted me...
  48. ECP

    Do We Live in Simulation?

    I don't think we're literally living in a simulation, but it certainly feels that way because of how surreal our lives have become. No matter what I try, I can't get well. It's like I keep failing and failing and failing, and I can't find a way out. If this were a video game, I could go online...
  49. ECP

    Is there a particular med you're interested in trying, and is there a primary care doctor or ENT...

    Is there a particular med you're interested in trying, and is there a primary care doctor or ENT who can prescribe it for you? My PCP has offered to prescribe me nortriptyline or clomipramine, even though the neurologist she consulted on my behalf told her that there are no recommended meds for...
  50. ECP

    Two weeks ago, I made the mistake of going into a bookstore for 20 minutes and a sandwich shop...

    Two weeks ago, I made the mistake of going into a bookstore for 20 minutes and a sandwich shop for 15 minutes, both with loud music. The earmuffs seemed helpful, but I still had a symptom spike afterward, and it hasn't gone away yet.
  51. ECP

    Sometimes it's reactive, sometimes not. I can eat out or go shopping if it's a quiet environment...

    Sometimes it's reactive, sometimes not. I can eat out or go shopping if it's a quiet environment with no music, but sadly, almost everywhere I go, they play music, and I get a burning ache from that, even if I wear ear protection.
  52. ECP

    Poll: Would You Trade Your Tinnitus for a 5-Year Prison Sentence?

    I had the COVID-19 vaccine in April, May, and November of 2021. My ear problems didn't start until September of 2022, so if the vaccine played any role in this, then there was a very long delay. I personally think that the vaccine wasn't a factor for me, so I have continued getting my annual...
  53. ECP

    Second Acoustic Trauma: Seeking Advice on Ear Fullness/Pressure

    I apologize that the loud music at the wedding party affected your ears. The symptoms you developed afterward are uncommon for the general population but, unfortunately, quite familiar to those of us who frequent this message board. Once your ears have experienced trauma, they might become more...
  54. ECP

    Poll: Would You Trade Your Tinnitus for a 5-Year Prison Sentence?

    Even though I love movies, I never got around to seeing "The Green Mile." After you mentioned it, I looked it up online, and the plot summary was so interesting that I decided to add it to my Amazon Prime movie list. I agree with you that this poll isn't helpful at all because it isn't based...
  55. ECP

    I'm guessing that either the relaxation of being on holiday, or the distraction of novel...

    I'm guessing that either the relaxation of being on holiday, or the distraction of novel stimuli, did something to her nervous system that enabled her legs to work better than usual. So maybe taking time off work and finding some relaxing things to do will help your ears and eyes.
  56. ECP

    I hope the downtime will allow you to unwind so that your body can heal at a faster rate...

    I hope the downtime will allow you to unwind so that your body can heal at a faster rate. Christina Applegate, who has MS and walks with a cane, said that when she went on vacation to Paris, she didn't need to use the cane as much as she expected.
  57. ECP

    Your landlord shouldn't be letting the dogs bark so much, but it's a moot point now that you've...

    Your landlord shouldn't be letting the dogs bark so much, but it's a moot point now that you've planned your escape. Congratulations on the new place!
  58. ECP

    Poll: Would You Trade Your Tinnitus for a 5-Year Prison Sentence?

    If I had the power to do it, Allen, I'd sentence you and every one of us here to a hundred hours of community service. Afterward, we will all be released from tinnitus and hyperacusis with perfectly healthy ears and brains and live happily ever after. If I were a real judge who could make such...
  59. ECP

    What's the issue with having balconies?

    What's the issue with having balconies?
  60. ECP

    They all claim to be as quiet as a whisper... but when it's over 100 degrees outside, you have...

    They all claim to be as quiet as a whisper... but when it's over 100 degrees outside, you have to run it on full blast, and that's loud.