It's been a long while since I've visited here, that in itself has not always been a good sign, but I can finally say something is happening.
To shortly introduce myself to those not familiar, I'm a girl in my start twenties, acquired t from excessive (normal) ipod usage, and dj'ing/going to concerts.
For years I've been battling serious invisible and untreated mental illness, as well as immense physical pain which all have kept me from living a normal functioning life. On the outside I've maintained a facade of success, and on the inside I was/am deeply crippled.
When tinnitus struck me, it was a second deadly blow, to one already fatally wounded through many years.
My freedom was already limited, and it added extra limitation by taking away my dj'ing, the one freespace I had left. I've been suicidal many times prior to tinnitus and actually especially during the weeks right before onset.
2 months into tinnitus, I ended up on the ER for mental health, and to my luck the psychiatrists suspected the phantom sounds as potentially acute psychosis. My ears was messed up by music I know, nevertheless as they suspected tinnitus as a potential psychological hallucination, it opened up a recognition for my more severe suffering from other symptoms.
I've been in intense directed treatment for about a year now, and yet as it hasn't been the miracle I hoped for, it has definitely added improvement to my quality of life.
I look back with great ambivalence, what was greatly traumatic was at the same time a happy accident, that opened up for the treatment I'm receiving, and my diagnosis' offers the opportunity of the authorities paying for my education, the one of my dreams
As much as I feel I've won the worst genetical lottery, I'm playing the cards I've been given and seizing the opportunities it has provided me with, and I haven't thrived to this extent in a long time.
I've yet to reach complete habituation, but my intend here is to provide some hope and make you realise if I can somewhat successfully do this with my extravagantly bad bagground of sickness, so can you. My main problem was my other symptoms keeping incapable of staying occupied in order to divert my attention from t. Be it anxiety and whatnot. If your symptoms are physical, do something psychological, and are your symptoms psychological, try to do something physical. Many have said it before and I repeat key is to break your occupation with tinnitus, force yourself to do what you like doing, and divert your occupation there.
On another note I attended to a party some weeks ago with loud music wearing my custom molded earplugs, and it was amazing.
I'm planning on adding to my success update in future
Hang in there guys!
cheers
To shortly introduce myself to those not familiar, I'm a girl in my start twenties, acquired t from excessive (normal) ipod usage, and dj'ing/going to concerts.
For years I've been battling serious invisible and untreated mental illness, as well as immense physical pain which all have kept me from living a normal functioning life. On the outside I've maintained a facade of success, and on the inside I was/am deeply crippled.
When tinnitus struck me, it was a second deadly blow, to one already fatally wounded through many years.
My freedom was already limited, and it added extra limitation by taking away my dj'ing, the one freespace I had left. I've been suicidal many times prior to tinnitus and actually especially during the weeks right before onset.
2 months into tinnitus, I ended up on the ER for mental health, and to my luck the psychiatrists suspected the phantom sounds as potentially acute psychosis. My ears was messed up by music I know, nevertheless as they suspected tinnitus as a potential psychological hallucination, it opened up a recognition for my more severe suffering from other symptoms.
I've been in intense directed treatment for about a year now, and yet as it hasn't been the miracle I hoped for, it has definitely added improvement to my quality of life.
I look back with great ambivalence, what was greatly traumatic was at the same time a happy accident, that opened up for the treatment I'm receiving, and my diagnosis' offers the opportunity of the authorities paying for my education, the one of my dreams
As much as I feel I've won the worst genetical lottery, I'm playing the cards I've been given and seizing the opportunities it has provided me with, and I haven't thrived to this extent in a long time.
I've yet to reach complete habituation, but my intend here is to provide some hope and make you realise if I can somewhat successfully do this with my extravagantly bad bagground of sickness, so can you. My main problem was my other symptoms keeping incapable of staying occupied in order to divert my attention from t. Be it anxiety and whatnot. If your symptoms are physical, do something psychological, and are your symptoms psychological, try to do something physical. Many have said it before and I repeat key is to break your occupation with tinnitus, force yourself to do what you like doing, and divert your occupation there.
On another note I attended to a party some weeks ago with loud music wearing my custom molded earplugs, and it was amazing.
I'm planning on adding to my success update in future
Hang in there guys!
cheers
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