It's There But Who Cares?

[AlecP]

Certainly not me that's for sure.

Hi everyone, it's been a while since I've posted on the site - I've mostly been loitering occasionally, keeping track of treatment research but I'm here now to give you all an update nearly a year and a half after my T began. Just a word of warning...LONG POSITIVE POST AHEAD

I won't lie to you, I hear my tinnitus daily. Not all the time but often enough for me to remember I have it. Simply put, it's there BUT I just don't care any more. I got so tired of monitoring it day after day, wondering whether it would go away and if I'd be able to cope etc etc - it was bullshit and I just made myself so stressed and wound up. Being on this forum helped in the early stages because there were people here who could help me understand the condition and give me hope for the future. However, there was also plenty of scary stuff that I read too and that, in all honesty, can really set you back a few steps when you see it. That's why I've kept clear of the site for the most part over the last 6-7 months.

I've progressed so much over the last 8 months and I can honestly and happily state, as fact, that I am 100% habituated to my T and frankly it happened without me noticing. more or less. It's true what they say, habituation isn't a myth, it happens slowly but surely - you take 1 step forward and 2 steps back but you get there eventually.

My advice to people who want, more than anything, to get to the point that I'm at comes in several parts:

1) As shit as this may sound, the most important step on the road to habituation is ACCEPTANCE. As soon as I accepted that my T was here to stay I was able to worry about it less and less. You stop wishing for it to go away, you stop thinking that your life has changed for the worse and instead you realise that your life is simply moving forward in a different way than you had imagined it would. It's not awful or weird or annoying, it's just how your life is now. When I realised this I was overwhelmed by a significant sense of relief and was able to return to how I was before this all started.

2) I found it extremely important to maintain as much 'normalcy' in my life as possible. Of course make some changes that will protect your ears going forward, but don't stop doing things (particularly noisy things) that you enjoy just because of your T - slap some ear plugs in and go have fun. Hell I've very recently taken up clay pigeon shooting as a past time haha, I just double up my ear plugs (in ear and over the ear) and fire away - I'm not crippled by a fear that it might get worse - I'm just living my life how I would even if I didn't have T.

3) Don't fret over spikes, setbacks or the fear of permanent worsening. This does nothing but raise your stress levels and this in turn makes the situation a lot worse. At the end of the day if it happens it happens but most likely your T will get better and you will adapt to it. I have had a lot of random spikes since it began but in the end my T has always come back down to base level and to be honest even if it was worse, I genuinely believe that I'd be able to deal with that too.

4) Reduce your time on sites such as Tinnitus Talk and stay away from forum entries that have bad news and negativity. Although this can be very hard for newbies (god was it hard for me), staying away from this site for a few months did me so much good it's hard to express. Yes Tinnitus Talk is an excellent and positive site, but there are also a lot of scare stories that will do nothing positive for your state of mind. Take my advice and just keep to looking at treatment research and success stories or nothing at all. Instead go out and live your life!

5) Play copious amounts of video games

I really hope that this can help some of you that may be struggling or new to tinnitus or both. Once you can force yourself to accept it the sooner your mindset will change from 'my life is over' to 'this is my life now and I'm okay with that'. I genuinely feel as though I am as happy as I was before this all started, if not more so. It may take a while but you WILL get there eventually!

Good luck and I wish you all the best! Comments and questions welcome of course!!

Alec

 

[Raggs]

Thank you for sharing..I'm here reading the success stories right now to try and calm down..I'm at 10 months and still feel like I won't be able to accept this..I just hope that I don't have to convince myself, I hope it just happens with time.

 

[Mclyra]

Thank you! You are right about one thing: since I've started coming here only for the success stories and nothing else, I started to improve.

Control your reaction towards t rather than trying to control t itself is the key for me.

 

[Rob 207]

Thank you for the positive post! I've had T for about 6 months now, and my overall anxiety has gone way down, but I am still having fairly significant trouble sleeping. Please, tell me, now that you've habituated, has sleep become normal for you? What's your experience with sleep now?

 

[AlecP]

@Raggs - one of the worst things you can do is force habituation. This only serves to increase your awareness of it! Honestly it will happen more or less without you even noticing, one day you will simply wake up and realise that you just do not care about it anymore!

@Mclyra - glad to hear it! Reading about other people's negative experiences isn't going to do your state of mind any favours.

@Rob 207 - strangely I've never had any problems with sleeping since the very first night. To be honest, even though I can obviously hear it clearly at night, my brain somehow tunes it out and I drift off to sleep. I consider myself lucky because I know people, such as yourself, struggle with sleep. I'd definitely suggest doing positive things during the day that tire you out mentally and/or physically, exercise is a good example unless you hate it like I do.