- Mar 21, 2017
- 1
- Tinnitus Since
- A few weeks
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Unknown
Hi! I have severe OCD and it is largely health-centered. I have gone through a successful course of CBT therapy for my "Pure O" (I know, a misnomer – my compulsions are largely internal). A few weeks ago I woke up with a strange ringing in my ear, that now follows me wherever I go. I spend a lot of time googling and catastrophizing (my life is ruined, I'll never hear silence again) and checking whether I hear it in quiet spaces.
I know these are compulsions, and it's taken all my willpower to resist these behaviors most of the time. The problem here is, the most of my health-related OCD thoughts (AIDS, cancer, etc) are clearly unfounded, and as such I have been able to rid myself of the distressing thoughts using mindfulness and targeted ERP exercises. With tinnitus, it is ever-present. I wonder: will I never hear silence again? Will I let it ruin my life? It feels inescapable.
I know that it may still subside, but I know I am not supposed to reassure myself with that hope/fact. I know most people habituate, but I also know this is a form of unhelpful reassurance. I guess what I'm asking is: am I on the right course in trying to stop "checking" and to stop self-reassuring? Or are there further mental exercises I need to undertake in order help myself habituate without falling into the OCD trap?
Thank you in advance for any guidance. What I really want to hear is "it will go away" or "you will definitely habituate" but I know given my OCD, that would only help me in the short term. I am in the middle of IVF treatment and I don't have my trusty fallbacks (a glass of wine at the end of the day, Xanax, the odd cigarette) and need to get myself right before I have a baby – a kid who, given my family history of OCD – might need more guidance from me on how to tackle the OCD monster.
I know these are compulsions, and it's taken all my willpower to resist these behaviors most of the time. The problem here is, the most of my health-related OCD thoughts (AIDS, cancer, etc) are clearly unfounded, and as such I have been able to rid myself of the distressing thoughts using mindfulness and targeted ERP exercises. With tinnitus, it is ever-present. I wonder: will I never hear silence again? Will I let it ruin my life? It feels inescapable.
I know that it may still subside, but I know I am not supposed to reassure myself with that hope/fact. I know most people habituate, but I also know this is a form of unhelpful reassurance. I guess what I'm asking is: am I on the right course in trying to stop "checking" and to stop self-reassuring? Or are there further mental exercises I need to undertake in order help myself habituate without falling into the OCD trap?
Thank you in advance for any guidance. What I really want to hear is "it will go away" or "you will definitely habituate" but I know given my OCD, that would only help me in the short term. I am in the middle of IVF treatment and I don't have my trusty fallbacks (a glass of wine at the end of the day, Xanax, the odd cigarette) and need to get myself right before I have a baby – a kid who, given my family history of OCD – might need more guidance from me on how to tackle the OCD monster.