- May 11, 2020
- 20
- Tinnitus Since
- 08/2014 and 05/2020
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Unknown
Hi, I'm new here!
Sorry if my text is difficult to read: English is not my native language.
I know it's one of the worst mistakes to do, but right now it feels like tinnitus is sent to me directly from the devil. My tinnitus first started when I was 21 (way too early in life, I think), after an infection in the right ear - I'm 27 now.
It was a high-frequency noise, just like when you have an old TV and turn off the sound. It drove me crazy in the beginning (and even more did the cortisone pills that gave me a really bad time), but after some time, I developed strategies to deal with it. The hardest part was and remained sleeping, not only falling asleep, but also not waking up again. The tinnitus was so present, it woke me up many times, and I wondered what was so loud in my room, before I noticed that the noise was coming from my head.
During the following years - hoping that it would eventually get better - I started avoiding loud places (not that I had gone to night clubs a lot before), stopped drinking alcohol (not that I had drunk a lot before) and so on.
I didn't feel restrained by that, because I hoped that my "good behavior" would finally yield some results. On other parts of life, I decided not to get tinnitus in my way and finished university, started a good job and engaged in all kinds of activities.
A couple of weeks ago, when the Corona restrictions started, I moved back home to my family for a couple of weeks, working from home office. In mid-April, the night before my 27th birthday actually, I started hearing some noise coming from the heating. I didn't bother too much, because it was cold outside, so no wonder the heating was put on (although tinnitus has made me sensitive to noise coming from "outside" as well). However, during the next days, the noise remained. I called a mechanic to try and find the cause of the noise, and spent a lot of time in the cellar trying to locate the source of the noise. So much had I processed my tinnitus, that I didn't even consider it could be from inside my head. In fact, it sounded so extremely real!
Last weekend, I was staying at a friend's house - and I was hearing the heating noise there, too. Suddenly it was clear for me: It wasn't real. Since I realized that, I didn't really sleep for more than 3 or 4 hours in a row. Today, I got a cortisone injection into my right ears - Please hope together with me that it has some effect: All my strategies (putting the right, "noisy" ear on top while the "quiet" ear rests on the pillow, etc.) are worthless. The two noises ("beep" from the right, and "heating" from the left) keep fighting each other at night. Has anyone here been in this situation?
In addition, my last 6 years seem like a fraud to me. Why did I give up some experiences hoping to improve, when I only got worse?
I really don't know how to go on.
I'm just so incredibly tired but still can't get enough sleep.
Sorry if my text is difficult to read: English is not my native language.
I know it's one of the worst mistakes to do, but right now it feels like tinnitus is sent to me directly from the devil. My tinnitus first started when I was 21 (way too early in life, I think), after an infection in the right ear - I'm 27 now.
It was a high-frequency noise, just like when you have an old TV and turn off the sound. It drove me crazy in the beginning (and even more did the cortisone pills that gave me a really bad time), but after some time, I developed strategies to deal with it. The hardest part was and remained sleeping, not only falling asleep, but also not waking up again. The tinnitus was so present, it woke me up many times, and I wondered what was so loud in my room, before I noticed that the noise was coming from my head.
During the following years - hoping that it would eventually get better - I started avoiding loud places (not that I had gone to night clubs a lot before), stopped drinking alcohol (not that I had drunk a lot before) and so on.
I didn't feel restrained by that, because I hoped that my "good behavior" would finally yield some results. On other parts of life, I decided not to get tinnitus in my way and finished university, started a good job and engaged in all kinds of activities.
A couple of weeks ago, when the Corona restrictions started, I moved back home to my family for a couple of weeks, working from home office. In mid-April, the night before my 27th birthday actually, I started hearing some noise coming from the heating. I didn't bother too much, because it was cold outside, so no wonder the heating was put on (although tinnitus has made me sensitive to noise coming from "outside" as well). However, during the next days, the noise remained. I called a mechanic to try and find the cause of the noise, and spent a lot of time in the cellar trying to locate the source of the noise. So much had I processed my tinnitus, that I didn't even consider it could be from inside my head. In fact, it sounded so extremely real!
Last weekend, I was staying at a friend's house - and I was hearing the heating noise there, too. Suddenly it was clear for me: It wasn't real. Since I realized that, I didn't really sleep for more than 3 or 4 hours in a row. Today, I got a cortisone injection into my right ears - Please hope together with me that it has some effect: All my strategies (putting the right, "noisy" ear on top while the "quiet" ear rests on the pillow, etc.) are worthless. The two noises ("beep" from the right, and "heating" from the left) keep fighting each other at night. Has anyone here been in this situation?
In addition, my last 6 years seem like a fraud to me. Why did I give up some experiences hoping to improve, when I only got worse?
I really don't know how to go on.
I'm just so incredibly tired but still can't get enough sleep.