Tinnitus Maybe from Anxiety / Listening to Music on Headphones — No Pleasure in Life Now

[PortugalTheMan]

I have been buzzing since January 7. I was going through a phase of generalized anxiety but I was not taking any medication.

After waking up with the tinnitus, I immediately went to the doctor who didn't even send me to an ENT and said it was caused by stress, and gave me Diazepam 10 mg and Escitalopram 20 mg. The tinnitus didn't get better. I even noticed that it might have been worse as the days went by. Later I went to the ENT and did auditory exams, none of them reported hearing loss (although an extended audiogram was not administered).

The problem here is that I have been scared since that day and I can't enjoy my life, I can't enjoy the moments of pleasure. I seem like a meaningless person in life. I am always crying in the morning and my family and girlfriend can no longer stand to see me like this, nor can I stand to see myself like this, I cannot take pleasure in the little things in life. The only thing I do is read this forum, and try to get some strength, and see the scientific research and success stories, as I am desperate for this to be cured.

My tinnitus changes a lot. Last week it was just static, while every now and then a 500 Hz tonal tone appeared. This week it sounds like a very thin and loud electric hiss.

Another thing that makes me desperate is that nobody knows what might be causing my tinnitus, so that at least I could have hope for a cure.

Tomorrow I'm going to have a consultation with a psychologist, because I thought it might help me.

Like all of you, I was the happiest person in the world before I had tinnitus.

Do you have any suggestions for me?

 

[livewire77]

You can roughly check your high frequencies here:

https://www.audiocheck.net/audiotests_frequencycheckhigh.php

I have -75 dB/-50 dB L/R at 8 kHz on standard audiometry, but I can hear something up to 11 kHz. Obviously - start with your volume DOWN.

 

[Steph1710]

@PortugalTheMan, it will become easier. You're only a few months into tinnitus. It could still disappear for you.

If it helps, I could easily have killed myself when I first developed tinnitus. I felt like I would never be happy again. However, that hasn't been the case. My life is pretty good despite many health problems.

This is what I did, which helped me deal with my tinnitus.

Firstly, I decided to carry on as normal but with ear protection either in/or having some on me at all times - plugs and over ear protection. This made me feel secure that if noise did occur, I could protect my ears.

Secondly, I then decided to start introducing all the things I used to do, back into my life. The most challenging part was socialising because I felt incredibly isolated being the only one who could hear all the different sounds in my head/ears. However, as time went on, and with me forcing myself to listen to what people were saying, instead of the tinnitus, I could forget about it for a few minutes here and there - fast forward a year, and those minutes are now hours.

Thirdly, I decided to let everyone around me know that the sounds were driving me crazy, so people would knew that I was suffering and how shit it is. Amazingly, once I started telling people I had tinnitus, so many people said that they also have tinnitus. I suddenly felt less isolated because I knew I wasn't the only person in the room who was sitting in constant noise.

Fourthly, I started making jokes about it such as - "ring, ring ring! I hear ya, you noisy bastard!"
I found making jokes really helped to lighten my reaction towards tinnitus - especially if I was/am having a louder day.

Lastly, I read somewhere that you're not really a true metal head (I love metal and all music) unless you have tinnitus - and that sealed the deal for me. Now I see it as a condition I have because I'm a hardcore music fan! And I'm okay with that haha.

But my overall advice to you, would be to carry on doing the things you done before. Try and pretend you don't even have it. Eventually, you will begin to put it to the back of your mind. Or even if that doesn't happen, you're reaction to the sound will become more relaxed. I sit in silence now and I hear it 24/7 but it doesn't bother me. It is my new silence.

Put it this way, I never thought I would be able to deal with it - but I have! That's a true miracle right there.

Whatever you do, don't let this awful condition rob you of your happiness/life. Don't let it beat you! You've got this! You'll find that inner strength eventually, but right now, because you're new to this, allow yourself to be weak. Allow yourself to mourn your old life. That's okay. Just take one day at a time my friend.

Steph x

 

[PortugalTheMan]

@PortugalTheMan, it will become easier. You're only a few months into tinnitus. It could still disappear for you.

If it helps, I could easily have killed myself when I first developed tinnitus. I felt like I would never be happy again. However, that hasn't been the case. My life is pretty good despite many health problems.

This is what I did, which helped me deal with my tinnitus.

Firstly, I decided to carry on as normal but with ear protection either in/or having some on me at all times - plugs and over ear protection. This made me feel secure that if noise did occur, I could protect my ears.

Secondly, I then decided to start introducing all the things I used to do, back into my life. The most challenging part was socialising because I felt incredibly isolated being the only one who could hear all the different sounds in my head/ears. However, as time went on, and with me forcing myself to listen to what people were saying, instead of the tinnitus, I could forget about it for a few minutes here and there - fast forward a year, and those minutes are now hours.

Thirdly, I decided to let everyone around me know that the sounds were driving me crazy, so people would knew that I was suffering and how shit it is. Amazingly, once I started telling people I had tinnitus, so many people said that they also have tinnitus. I suddenly felt less isolated because I knew I wasn't the only person in the room who was sitting in constant noise.

Fourthly, I started making jokes about it such as - "ring, ring ring! I hear ya, you noisy bastard!"
I found making jokes really helped to lighten my reaction towards tinnitus - especially if I was/am having a louder day.

Lastly, I read somewhere that you're not really a true metal head (I love metal and all music) unless you have tinnitus - and that sealed the deal for me. Now I see it as a condition I have because I'm a hardcore music fan! And I'm okay with that haha.

But my overall advice to you, would be to carry on doing the things you done before. Try and pretend you don't even have it. Eventually, you will begin to put it to the back of your mind. Or even if that doesn't happen, you're reaction to the sound will become more relaxed. I sit in silence now and I hear it 24/7 but it doesn't bother me. It is my new silence.

Put it this way, I never thought I would be able to deal with it - but I have! That's a true miracle right there.

Whatever you do, don't let this awful condition rob you of your happiness/life. Don't let it beat you! You've got this! You'll find that inner strength eventually, but right now, because you're new to this, allow yourself to be weak. Allow yourself to mourn your old life. That's okay. Just take one day at a time my friend.

Steph x

What incredible words. My mindset has to change to be like yours.

I thought it was a joke, the fact of making jokes with your tinnitus, I am / was a very funny and willing person, I will try to do the same.

And I know that I have to put an end to my thoughts of:

"26 years old and I may have something chronic with no apparent cure for the rest of my life."

"How am I going to rest and relax with these unbearable noises."

"I had to give myself such a debilitating symptom that science is not even sure what it is for sure."

Another thing that makes me worried is what caused the tinnitus. I don't know if I have a problem with the auditory nerve, the cochlea or if it is even something else. I don't know which of the new drugs that are being researched/trialed would work on me.

I really appreciate your testimony which made my day bright, and you should know that if you ever visit Portugal, you will have a guide here for you to visit this wonderful country!

 

[Peter61]

My tinnitus changes a lot. Last week it was just static, while every now and then a 500 Hz tonal tone appeared. This week it sounds like a very thin and loud electric hiss.

This is exactly what my tinnitus sounds like. An electric hiss, as if my brain is connected to electricity by a plug in a socket.

It gives this "full" feeling in my head, there's always this buzzing brain activity. Sometimes it suddenly stops, and in just one second of blissful euphoria, I think: Thank God, it's gone! But then a tonal tone appears, which lasts for about 7 or 8 seconds, then becomes quieter until it completely disappears and is replaced again by the old hiss.

It's such a strange phenomenon, like the brain is confused. I wish my brain would just relax and accept the fact that some frequencies have been lost without trying to compensate for them by producing these useless phantom sounds 24-7-365. It must be some mistake, some shortcoming of nature, of human evolution, that the human brain makes this error. The same thing with the fact that hair cells in the cochlea are not able to regenerate themselves. The human body is most vulnerable and far from perfect.

 

[Ken219]

Amazingly, once I started telling people I had tinnitus, so many people said that they also have tinnitus. I suddenly felt less isolated because I knew I wasn't the only person in the room who was sitting in constant noise.

So other people's suffering made you feel better?

 

[PortugalTheMan]

This is exactly what my tinnitus sounds like. An electric hiss, as if my brain is connected to electricity by a plug in a socket.

It gives this "full" feeling in my head, there's always this buzzing brain activity. Sometimes it suddenly stops, and in just one second of blissful euphoria, I think: Thank God, it's gone! But then a tonal tone appears, which lasts for about 7 or 8 seconds, then becomes quieter until it completely disappears and is replaced again by the old hiss.

It's such a strange phenomenon, like the brain is confused. I wish my brain would just relax and accept the fact that some frequencies have been lost without trying to compensate for them by producing these useless phantom sounds 24-7-365. It must be some mistake, some shortcoming of nature, of human evolution, that the human brain makes this error. The same thing with the fact that hair cells in the cochlea are not able to regenerate themselves. The human body is most vulnerable and far from perfect.

This electrical hiss when it disappears is static.

Last week I spent all day at home telecommuting and did not walk down the street listening to the noise of the day and it became static.

 

[Steph1710]

So other people's suffering made you feel better?

Yeah man, it gives me a natural high. Much better than drugs.

 

[PortugalTheMan]

So other people's suffering made you feel better?

With millions of people who have tinnitus, it is still difficult for the general public to perceive our suffering. Imagine if we were the only ones suffering.

Nobody likes to see anyone suffer but we like to know that we are not alone.

 

[Steph1710]

Nobody likes to see anyone suffer but we like to know that we are not alone.

The people I was referring to in my post, are my close friends and family. I wouldn't wish this on anyone, but it was comforting to know they could relate to what I was going/am going through.

The post above saying, "other's people suffering makes me feel better" - is an incredibly insulting thing to say. And I can't believe out of the positive post I wrote, that is all he took from it.

*slaps hand on forehead*


Anyway, @PortugalTheMan so glad I could make you feel a little better. You will get there. It's a bumpy road and I still have days where it gets to me more than other days, but the overall trend is that you begin to feel better. Time is a great healer. And being a positive guy, I am sure you'll find your own way through this mess.

I understand it must be frustrating that you don't know what has caused your T. Perhaps you'll never know - but you'll come to terms with that too.

Oh, and I'll definitely take you up on the tour guide offer! Everyone knows by now, that I love travelling and do it often. Be nice to have someone who knows the area to show me around.
And - We can moan about our tinnitus at the same time

 

[Brain Tumor Dave]

I've had tinnitus my whole life initially from bleeding ear infections 50 years ago. I don't remember a day without tinnitus. And my 2008 brain tumor discovery added much stronger tinnitus, and my one deaf ear that ONLY hears tinnitus. Audiologists say it should be "debilitating" tinnitus, yet I feel I still live a happy life. I still fly my Powered Paraglider. I still ride my Waverunner. I still travel and enjoy life.

I think the main difference in my case and others is that it's not NEW to me. For me I'm guessing it would be like suddenly not seeing in color, or not tasting any food. That would suck. But I think a positive outlook, and knowing the joys you'll doubtless experience in the future, should keep you happy.

 

[Steph1710]

Audiologists say it should be "debilitating" tinnitus, yet I feel I still live a happy life. I still fly my Powered Paraglider. I still ride my Waverunner. I still travel and enjoy life.

You are an inspiration Dave.

I really enjoyed waking up and reading your post. Especially as I've woken up with louder tinnitus than usual - and it's bugging me more today. But stories like yours, remind me to try carry on as normal... because let's face it. I can't do anything about it anyway.

So jealous of your paraglider! I always wanted to have a go on one. I bet it's awesome.

Steph x

 

[Lukee]

Sometimes it suddenly stops, and in just one second of blissful euphoria, I think: Thank God, it's gone! But then a tonal tone appears, which lasts for about 7 or 8 seconds, then becomes quieter until it completely disappears and is replaced again by the old hiss.

I get this fleeting tinnitus about once a week and it's my favorite part of the day when everything just goes completely silent for a few seconds. It's like someone unplugged a loud speaker that has been hissing because of no input and suddenly it's completely silent.

 

[Steph1710]

I get this fleeting tinnitus about once a week and it's my favorite part of the day when everything just goes completely silent for a few seconds.

I have fleeting tinnitus throughout the entire day sometimes. I was told it would settle down, but it hasn't yet.

 

[Lukee]

I have fleeting tinnitus throughout the entire day sometimes. I was told it would settle down, but it hasn't yet.

Ya it's really crazy how everything changes once you have tinnitus. For most people it's "just a sound you hear" and for others it's accompanied by headaches, feelings, pain, hyperacusis, etc. I used to get the odd fleeting tinnitus about once every few weeks, now it's at least weekly, but like I said, it's actually a reprieve from the constant hiss.

 

[PortugalTheMan]

I have fleeting tinnitus throughout the entire day sometimes. I was told it would settle down, but it hasn't yet.

I had a fleeting tinnitus 2 weeks ago, but it stopped and I never had it again.

 

[Benjaminbb]

I had a fleeting tinnitus 2 weeks ago, but it stopped and I never had it again.

I'm sure you've made a lot of progress by now but one thing I can say is it is the anxiety and fear that makes you feel that way. The idea that you don't know what caused it, the idea that it could be with you forever, the fixation on the sound.
For me all this went away in time and I feel great now. Unless you have severe tinnitus you can usually always live your life.

I stopped drinking coffee, alcohol, salty foods all this shit that I read online, which made my life far more boring and consequently horrible and stressful. Once I started living again I realised there's so much hope. Those things also had no effect.

I learnt that this "unbearable" sound wasn't unbearable at all. It was everything that I let stress me out around it. Along with fixating on it and always thinking about it.

I hope you've found that place and if not yet, talk to me and I'll help you.

 

[PortugalTheMan]

Hi @Benjaminbb. The first four months my tinnitus was horrible, it was always increasing in volume, and I cried every day. I heard my tinnitus almost everywhere, in the car watching TV, on the street, running, everywhere...

In the 4th month it started getting lower and I started to get calmer. I currently hear it in a quiet room. I have times when I don't hear it in a silent room and I have to cover my ears to hear it.

I didn't stop drinking alcohol, or eating sugar, or salt, I just started protecting my ears with foam and silicone earplugs.

I think I can live like this, but the way it has gone down, I'm hoping that one day it will disappear. If it doesn't, I hope to be strong and not stress about it.

Thanks for your help, I hope we can help each other on Tinnitus Talk. Regardless whether my tinnitus goes away or not, I will never leave this forum, I will want to help new people who are traumatized like I was.

P.S.
The hyperacusis I had also went away this month. All improvements came after protecting the ears from everyday sounds.

 

[Jack Straw]

I have fleeting tinnitus throughout the entire day sometimes. I was told it would settle down, but it hasn't yet.

When you say you had it throughout the day, does that mean you had multiple episodes that lasted a couple of seconds or one episode that lasted throughout the day?

 

[Steph1710]

When you say you had it throughout the day, does that mean you had multiple episodes that lasted a couple of seconds or one episode that lasted throughout the day?

Multiple episodes that last a couple of seconds throughout the day.

Actually, I said in my original post that it hasn't settled down. But as of writing this, it has actually settled down, and now I only get it every so often.

Anyway, I hope that clears things up?

 

[PortugalTheMan]

Hi everyone, I'm 8 months into tinnitus.

My tinnitus doesn't seem to be severe, since I can mask it with a lot of sounds, I only hear it in a quieter place like in a parked car or in a quiet park.

I'm having problems with my tinnitus tone, I don't know if this is hyperacusis, but being exposed to sounds, even if they're not loud, I get new tinnitus tones. This is difficult because I want to hang out with my friends and walk around and I'm always afraid of getting worse and getting a new tone.

Is this hyperacusis? Because the discomfort I feel when around normal sounds is a fear of my tinnitus getting worse, not the discomfort of hearing the sound.

I don't know what to do or how to treat it, I have a cousin and a grandmother with tinnitus, and they can be exposed to whatever noises they want and their tinnitus doesn't change at all. In other words, they manage to have a normal life. Here I am, the most I can do is stay in my silent room crying and watch Instagram Stories of people being happy.

I've already said this in another post, but assuming that hyperacusis or reactive tinnitus is derived from a lesion in the auditory nerve, do we have any research or any drug that is about to come out that can help us?

I don't want to live like this my whole life.

But I'm afraid that if I expose myself to sounds I might end up like many here who can't deal with their tinnitus and end their lives.

 

[Stacken77]

Hi everyone, I'm 8 months into tinnitus.

My tinnitus doesn't seem to be severe, since I can mask it with a lot of sounds, I only hear it in a quieter place like in a parked car or in a quiet park.

I'm having problems with my tinnitus tone, I don't know if this is hyperacusis, but being exposed to sounds, even if they're not loud, I get new tinnitus tones. This is difficult because I want to hang out with my friends and walk around and I'm always afraid of getting worse and getting a new tone.

Is this hyperacusis? Because the discomfort I feel when around normal sounds is a fear of my tinnitus getting worse, not the discomfort of hearing the sound.

I don't know what to do or how to treat it, I have a cousin and a grandmother with tinnitus, and they can be exposed to whatever noises they want and their tinnitus doesn't change at all. In other words, they manage to have a normal life. Here I am, the most I can do is stay in my silent room crying and watch Instagram Stories of people being happy.

I've already said this in another post, but assuming that hyperacusis or reactive tinnitus is derived from a lesion in the auditory nerve, do we have any research or any drug that is about to come out that can help us?

I don't want to live like this my whole life.

But I'm afraid that if I expose myself to sounds I might end up like many here who can't deal with their tinnitus and end their lives.

I'm truly sorry to hear this @PortugalTheMan.

Has new tones come as a result of noise exposure since onset, or did it happen later? Did you have any secondary trauma which have made it "reactive"?

As I've previously written, I've been through a similar time in my journey where I would just constantly get new tones as a result of noise exposure. I believe I had 7-8 at one point(most of which as subsided by now), but it did stabilise after a 2-3 months or so now I rarely get new tones, although my baseline seems to increase instead, which is far more distressing.

There could be some type of sensitivity to sound involved in your case. I'd recommend to be a little more careful around sound, reduce the exposure, but just don't sit in complete silence all day as it can be counterproductive. In a few months it may stop to cause new tones.

I wish you all the best,
Stacken

 

[Jake S]

I've had tinnitus my whole life initially from bleeding ear infections 50 years ago. I don't remember a day without tinnitus. And my 2008 brain tumor discovery added much stronger tinnitus, and my one deaf ear that ONLY hears tinnitus. Audiologists say it should be "debilitating" tinnitus, yet I feel I still live a happy life. I still fly my Powered Paraglider. I still ride my Waverunner. I still travel and enjoy life.

I think the main difference in my case and others is that it's not NEW to me. For me I'm guessing it would be like suddenly not seeing in color, or not tasting any food. That would suck. But I think a positive outlook, and knowing the joys you'll doubtless experience in the future, should keep you happy.

Same here, I don't recall when it started. As far as I know, I was born with this constant buzzing/ringing in the ear. My mother was more shocked about than myself, it just seemed normal...

To the OP, in my experience I notice sugar makes the problem much worse. I'd advise monitoring everything you consume (food, drink, medicine) and keep track of any changes.

 

[PortugalTheMan]

I'm truly sorry to hear this @PortugalTheMan.

Has new tones come as a result of noise exposure since onset, or did it happen later? Did you have any secondary trauma which have made it "reactive"?

As I've previously written, I've been through a similar time in my journey where I would just constantly get new tones as a result of noise exposure. I believe I had 7-8 at one point(most of which as subsided by now), but it did stabilise after a 2-3 months or so now I rarely get new tones, although my baseline seems to increase instead, which is far more distressing.

There could be some type of sensitivity to sound involved in your case. I'd recommend to be a little more careful around sound, reduce the exposure, but just don't sit in complete silence all day as it can be counterproductive. In a few months it may stop to cause new tones.

I wish you all the best,
Stacken

It has been reactive since after the first few months.

I wear hearing protection, I wear foam pads when I'm alone, and I wear noise-cancelling headphones when I'm with someone so I can understand what they're saying and have some protection.

Now everything I go to is noisy, even a beach, screaming children, jet skis, people carrying portable speakers.

There I have to put on my hearing protection and hear my tinnitus very loud, because as we know tinnitus with hearing protectors is hell.

 

[PortugalTheMan]

Hello everybody.

I'm giving my 9 month update.

Everything in these 9 months was so complicated, I think it was more difficult to live these 9 months than the 27 years of life until I had tinnitus.

I notice that the problems of other people around me seem so trivial compared to this 24/7 suffering of mine.

I can say that in these 9 months 70% of the days I cried, there were some good days, but they lasted very little.

Even using earplugs in most situations outside the home I get spikes. Yesterday I went to a friend's house for a snack and today I have several new tones and full of fear that this will stay forever. If I tell someone that going to a friend's house for a snack makes me feel bad, the person doesn't understand how this is possible, nor would I understand if it were the other way around before I had tinnitus.

It feels surreal, everything you do makes you worse. I don't think I have hyperacusis, the sounds don't bother me when I hear it, but they bother my tinnitus making it worse with each exposure. But what am I going to do? Be stuck at home for years and years until a miracle cure for tinnitus are found?

Still, I think I would go crazy if I stayed at home for years and years without going out.
Waking up in the morning for me is always the most difficult moment, that moment when we are aware and hear some of our tinnitus, and we want to sleep a little longer, which is impossible with so much noise in the head, it gives us an anguish and an inexplicable suffering.

With each passing day / month I think things get more difficult, the hope that this could improve seems more distant, sometimes I wonder how I'm going to live the rest of my life. The word "habituation" makes me vomit, and I would like to know how a person who breaks a leg, instead of treating it and taking medication for the pain, would like to be given TRT so that they are happy with a broken leg. (This is my point of comparison when I hear the word "habituation").

Reading many posts on Tinnitus Talk, sometimes I feel weak because so many people who suffer the same as me and have other health problems manage to be happy even with very traumatic childhoods, and I'm healthy (except tinnitus).

This is how I feel.

Regarding tinnitus research, people all seem enthusiastic, but for tinnitus the only one we can hope for is OTO-313. I was happy with Dr. Susan Shore's device but as you can see in this flowchart, it only serves to treat the symptoms that tinnitus causes us (anxiety, depression...).

 

[PortugalTheMan]

10 month update.

Unfortunately I haven't noticed any improvement, time doesn't seem to heal this

What I've been doing for the last month is I stopped staying at home, I started going to the office for work, I started going out on weekends and going out to dinner. I was avoiding to "cure" my ears.

I have been taking 1mg "Sedoxil" anxiolytic in the morning when I feel most anxious. The problem is that when I wake up, I feel all that noise in my ears and I try to stay warm in bed for a few more minutes, these minutes, although good for being in the hot bed, are torture for tinnitus. When I get up I start to cry from despair.

I tend to have thoughts about the uncertainty that this condition gives, I don't know if what I hear is something vascular, if it's hair cells or if it's a nerve... I need to know what I've damaged.

Last week I started doing acupuncture, and with one session there was no improvement in my tinnitus, in fact I had a spike in my 500 Hz tinnitus tone the next day. (I also have a high-frequency tinnitus tone).

Today I'm going to have another acupuncture appointment and I'm going to see if it interferes with my 500 Hz tinnitus again.

I had an appointment with the best ENT in Portugal, but he said he would only treat me if I had an MRI of the brain. But I'm afraid my tinnitus will get worse, I already have tinnitus so high-pitched that a permanent increase I think would end my life.