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  • I wonder if it's the bc of lack of occlusion effect today, or bc my ears acclimated to the low level sound I normally don't hear w/ plugs?
    I only wore earmuffs when an airplane or sirens came around, or when I left my room. Oddly enough, my t has been better today.
    On a positive note, my LDLs are going up. Except for high frqcy sound, my ldls are between 60-70. I was able to spend today without earplugs
    & my nephew got a Nntndo switch. Fans spike my t, so that's been fun. I try to let him play an hr or 2 but it becomes unbearable aftr that
    This summer has been such a struggle. We've had nearly 2 months of 90-105°+ weather, so everyone is running their ac all day long
    This week marks a year since this (reactive t and loudness h) started. One year homebound. What a fucking year lmao
    Kiyomi
    As I said I don't have that bad T/H, but I just want to be relaxed again so I can focus on my future.
    I miss my music so much. I spent so much time archiving music over the years, gathering knowledge about certain genres. Music is so nostalgic to me, it was everything. And now it's gone. And all the other things too. It just hurts.
    Kiyomi
    And I'm just scared. Scared that it won't get better to a point where I can feel ok again. Scared that I overdo it after it got better.

    I don't know where I will be in 3,6,12 months. It's the uncertainty that makes it so horrible.
    Kiyomi
    But I'm grateful that this forum exists and being able to write about my feelings. Because no one irl does or can understand.
    It's one of the very few things that really help me.
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