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@all to gain Yeaaa, I just decided not to go. Feels like I'm letting a lot of people down, painful way to live.

@OnceUponaTime By that I just meant, the person I am within my dreams, not any special avatar / character.

@TheDanishGirl It's crazy how much spikes affect my emotional state. I know it'll go back down, but still get all anxious, especially when I have to face family / society with a spike.

@Striveon I hope so too! It's never fun, especially when you have a commitment, and can't afford to Isolate on the weekend :-\

@InfiniteLoop Well, I dunno if it eliminates most of the fun. I've had plugs for in for most of the loud events in my life, and managed to have a good time. But it was a damn wedding reception just about 3 years ago, that did me in. Totally agree though, being unprotected just isn't worth it.

@TheDanishGirl Yea, it baffles me, how selective T & H are. My brother-in-law also has these strong ears, can just throw himself into a super loud environment, and come out fine, without even temporary T. Wish I had genes like that!

@TheDanishGirl The next thing I'm looking into again is vagus nerve stimulation, because it's connected to so many systems, auditory being one of them. I read that it can help tinnitus. I've tried it in the past with my Scenar, and plan on coming back to it soon.

It's just really a painful way to live... told my sister that he's touring now, and she said we'd have to go (also a fan), but now that I looked up the details, and see that it's this coming weekend, in small venues, I have to just omit that info to her, and let it pass. And the whole thing / my...

@TheDanishGirl Yeaaa, my thoughts exactly, hence the anxiety. I think I won't go, especially since my T & H have been unstable lately. Don't want to risk it, even with deeply inserted foam plugs. Here are the two venues though... second looks much better in terms of acoustics, but is still...

@Red Yeaaa, I've been doing the listening from memory thing too. Then I put the actual song on, and had to turn it down, realizing that the memory of it was sweeter, and had more clarity. Man, so depressing...

Wow, so I’m not alone in this right now. I feel like because of it, most of my decisions, and interactions with people are off. Then I retrace it in my mind, ways I could've positively altered the experience, by changing key decisions / things said. Then guilt, how I can't be more complete right...

And on top of that, my ENT did a rough job with a manual wax cleaning 4 days ago. He usually does a great job, but this time it was a bit painful. I coughed uncontrollably at one point, and he's like 'yup, that's the Jacobson nerve.' No apologies or anything, even though he knows my symptoms...

@Striveon @TheDanishGirl Yea, it really is a haunting existence. I'm struggling with a few other chronic health issues, so everything combined is overwhelming. I'm dreading the holidays, have a lot going on then.

Thanks guys. We actually agreed that I join them for the rehearsal ceremony / dinner a couple days before. I forgot how weddings have that. But that way, it's quieter, and we can actually have a convo / catch up.

@Bill Bauer Yea I'm thinking not to, but need to meditate on it some more. Just talked to a friend who thinks I should, but he doesn't really understand this condition.

@AZeurotuner That's rough man, sorry you have to deal with that. I'm in the mountains, so we have motocross / atvs riding around too. But compared to 5-10 - 20-30 / constant HD riders, I'll just be grateful for what I have to deal with here, lol.

@AZeurotuner Haha, I have the same reaction to those things, and have always respected the quiet cruisers. Props for owning one of those yourself. I knew a woman who was trying to explain the HD riding philosophy to me, and I kinda got it, but I don't get how those people don't have hearing...

@New Guy Damn, those are decent numbers, luckily there's just a couple at a time on the road I'm off. But we get motocross / atvs too. Doesn't seem like it's safe to walk outside right now. Open motors, dogs, etc... I need to find myself a nice quiet trail to walk on.