4 Months In and Part Way There

[AfroSnowman]

So I think I have been partially successful. My tinnitus is bad 3 days out of 4. On the good day I continually mutter to myself that if it could always be like this, always audible but quiet enough that it is only a nuisance, I would be be fine.

My big successes at 4 months are that I have mostly resumed my normal life, I no longer have a strong emotional response to the sounds (big pat on the back to myself-I really worked at this), and I've almost entirely stopped mourning for what I have lost. Even when it gets really bad I mostly keep a neutral attitude towards it. I'm not perfect, for example last night for the first time in a couple of weeks my eyes got leaky for a couple minutes due to self-pity, but I'm 95% good on those counts.

My next major goal is learn to ignore the sounds. Even though I am not being torn up by the noises anymore, I rarely have a moment that I am not fully aware of it. Any successful strategies for tricking the mind not to notice the sounds are welcome.

Anyone who just wants to tell me that I'm not doing well, please don't. This is challenging enough without discouragement. Cheers for me

 

[Roy114]

You are doing well. Honestly I recognise myself in what you're saying. Mine is always audible, but not super loud. Its just annoying and once I start thinking about it I can't get it out of my head and it tops every other sound (except masking noises). I haven't been on this website for a long time though, because it stopped bothering me for a while. Right now I return here because its been spiking this past week, but I know I'll go back to not caring anytime soon. Just taking this chance to encourage people like you. It will most likely not actually get less loud (although yours is pretty fresh so there's still a chance that it will). But your mind will harden to the sound and just care less and less.

There's always setbacks (like the one I'm in now), but it's mostly uphill if you just keep realising that tinnitus is a paper tiger. It may seem threatening, but its not, its just a phantom sound. People with very loud tinnitus will disagree, but I've read plenty of stories with people that have insanely screaming loud tinnitus, yet they still hardened to it and don't even notice it until they think about it (its still the same volume, the brain just fades it away as long as your attention is elsewhere). If I can, and they can, so can you.

 

[AfroSnowman]

Thank you @Roy114. I put this up in a moment of positivity both as a celebration of my first goals and to prompt some cheerleaders.

Your positivity makes getting through another early day in this process a bit easier.

 

[Autumnly]

There's always setbacks (like the one I'm in now), but it's mostly uphill if you just keep realising that tinnitus is a paper tiger. It may seem threatening, but its not, its just a phantom sound. People with very loud tinnitus will disagree, but I've read plenty of stories with people that have insanely screaming loud tinnitus, yet they still hardened to it and don't even notice it until they think about it (its still the same volume, the brain just fades it away as long as your attention is elsewhere).

This process doesn't work for everyone.

• The potential role of auditory prediction error in decompensated tinnitus: An auditory mismatch negativity study
• Toward An Exploration of Habituating to Tinnitus: Perspectives on Sensory Gating.

We can all share hope, support, and encouragement without ignoring that there are severe cases who are struggling without it being their fault. Unfortunately, not everyone's brain will tune it out. Let's not throw those severe sufferers under the bus and instead listen to all tinnitus stories.

@AfroSnowman Hope it'll continue to get better for you! Take good care of your hearing from now on. It seems like many people eventually find a way to cope and to go back to living their lives like they used to. You've only had tinnitus for a few months, in a few more months you could be feeling even better, you seem to have already made great progress.

 

[Edward92]

Reading positive stories make myself positive! I'm at a very early stage similar to your situation. Whatever the intensity is, I try to keep on doing the things I like to do, eventhough my brain freaks out about it 'because it might make it worse' (f.ex. playing the piano).
I went to the ENT specialist and got the answer most of us get: "We can't do anything about it." But I was prepared for that answer. The most important thing for my he said was that I don't have any visible damage in my ears.

My only challenge is to keep calm and distract my brain from the T. I hope I can follow your footsteps and find the same evolution. Keep staying positive! It's our best weapon!