About as Down as I Can Get...

[Nicola8478]

I'm so down. What with beating and the ringing and the sensitivity I feel like I've had enough. My Mom died two years ago and more than once I've found myself asking her to come and get me. Or I'm just ready to do it myself and go to her. I'm fighting so hard to see the light and I just can't.

I'm so desperately sad

 

[Bazan]

Never give up, in 4 months into this and have been feeling the same , a few days ago I felt a change in my mood, I still have loud t, but the way I feel about it is beginning to change and I'm feeling a lot happier , how long have you had it for?

 

[Holly1987]

I'm so down. What with beating and the ringing and the sensitivity I feel like I've had enough. My Mom died two years ago and more than once I've found myself asking her to come and get me. Or I'm just ready to do it myself and go to her. I'm fighting so hard to see the light and I just can't.

I'm so desperately sad

I really do understand how you feel, I'm so sorry you feel this way. Its 3am in the morning and I'm sitting here trying to calm myself, it's so so loud tonight. I will try to go for a walk when it's light. What are you up to?

 

[Jcb]

I'm so down. What with beating and the ringing and the sensitivity I feel like I've had enough. My Mom died two years ago and more than once I've found myself asking her to come and get me. Or I'm just ready to do it myself and go to her. I'm fighting so hard to see the light and I just can't.

I'm so desperately sad

I'm sorry you're feeling like this Nicola, there's plenty of people here who will listen and help. Have you been to your GP to discus how you're feeling? There's always help, you only need to ask. Have you any other family members to talk to.

 

[Jcb]

Never give up, in 4 months into this and have been feeling the same , a few days ago I felt a change in my mood, I still have loud t, but the way I feel about it is beginning to change and I'm feeling a lot happier , how long have you had it for?

So glad you're starting to feel better, made me smile hearing this.

 

[Nicola8478]

Badly since xmas. I hope I can get there. I honestly don't know what to do with myself anymore

 

[Nicola8478]

@Jcb i have an appointment with the doctor next week and one for counselling. It's the bits in between that are hard. I have family and friends and I'm so thankful for their help. It's amazing how lonely you can feel when your not really on your own

 

[Nicola8478]

@Holly1987 I'm sorry you're struggling too. It's half 4 in the afternoon here and I'm just sat here. Kind of drifting from one day to the next at the moment. I hate being like it. It's not like me but I feel so beat down

 

[Jcb]

Badly since xmas. I hope I can get there. I honestly don't know what to do with myself anymore

You will get there, it's a bumpy road with many ups and downs. It's hard to see there will be any light at the end of the tunnel so to speak.

@Jcb i have an appointment with the doctor next week and one for counselling. It's the bits in between that are hard. I have family and friends and I'm so thankful for their help. It's amazing how lonely you can feel when your not really on your own

I hear you there, especially when you said about your mum passing but you know what... she would want you to live the best life you can and is always with you. Yes you can have all the support in the world and still feel so lonely. It's good you'll be going to counselling hopefully this help you put your thoughts into place and help you sort through them. As far as the inbewtten parts, once you start counselling hopefully this will help put some good coping mechanisms in place to help through it. Do you like walking? Or any type of sports just to get you and about and that may help.

 

[Jcb]

I really do understand how you feel, I'm so sorry you feel this way. Its 3am in the morning and I'm sitting here trying to calm myself, it's so so loud tonight. I will try to go for a walk when it's light. What are you up to?

Sorry you're having a bad time as well.... I agree with going for a walk when's it light, it always helps settle my chaotic thoughts.

 

[Nicola8478]

@Jcb @Holly1987 My Dad is huge fan of walking I'll get him to come out with me and give it a go

Thank for your replies. It does help x

 

[Bazan]

@Jcb thank you , it's weird it like my brain coming out of shock , really beginning to feel like my old self again, the depression has lifted and the anxiety has calmed down, time is a healer???

 

[BobDigi]

It's amazing how lonely you can feel when your not really on your own

I've been where you are. And I've had that same feeling of being alone. Dispite the fact I've got a great family and good friends, I've had times when I feel all alone. Not the type of alone where I'm not with anyone. But the alone where nobody understands, and nobody can help.
About every 6 months to a year I seem to have a mini break down or something. It's usually health anxiety related. Or OCD driven.
Anyway it's important you get help from everyone around you. And that you see your doctor next week, and tell him/her exactly how low you've been. Good luck with the counseling. You'll be better in time. I know that sounds cliche, but it is the truth.

 

[Bill Bauer]

Since tinnitus can fade, don't do anything irreversible during the first 6-12 months. If one year from today you continue feeling the way you are feeling now (highly unlikely!) then you might revisit those thoughts. But for now try to ride it out and survive for another year...

 

[Nicola8478]

Thank you x

 

[Jcb]

@Jcb thank you , it's weird it like my brain coming out of shock , really beginning to feel like my old self again, the depression has lifted and the anxiety has calmed down, time is a healer???

I'm happy you're starting to get there, I know there will be a few more up and downs but hopefully you'll be able to deal with these much better now. It's a long road man but I'm more than confident you'll pull through. Yes I truly believe time is a healer if you let it be.

 

[Nicola8478]

Actually just called the Samaritans. Can't believe I've come to this.

 

[Jcb]

Actually just called the Samaritans. Can't believe I've come to this.

Did that help any? Did try going for a walk with your dad?

 

[Nicola8478]

Yes I had a talk with him and we planned something but I think he's struggling with how down I am too. Which makes me feel awful. I really don't want to bring anyone down with me you know

 

[SugarMagnolia]

Yes I had a talk with him and we planned something but I think he's struggling with how down I am too. Which makes me feel awful. I really don't want to bring anyone down with me you know

I get those feeling too, and when I do, I remind myself that I have to stay here for my parents. I couldn't do anything that would hurt them. You have your Dad and it sounds like you are close with him. Let him be your anchor to this world.

 

[Jcb]

Yes I had a talk with him and we planned something but I think he's struggling with how down I am too. Which makes me feel awful. I really don't want to bring anyone down with me you know

Try and not feel like that, of course he will worry about you that's his job, all parents are like that's ha ha. You won't be a burden to him and take him up on his offer and get some fresh air.

 

[Ed209]

I'm so down. What with beating and the ringing and the sensitivity I feel like I've had enough. My Mom died two years ago and more than once I've found myself asking her to come and get me. Or I'm just ready to do it myself and go to her. I'm fighting so hard to see the light and I just can't.

I'm so desperately sad

I'm really sorry to hear that. You're going through an incredibly tough and testing time which we are all familiar with here. There's almost nothing anyone can say on here that will put you at ease, because once your mindset and anxiety grab a hold of you, it's almost impossible to get out of its grip. This takes time and when you're painfully depressed it's extremely distressing. All I can say is that it does get easier and you will overcome your troubles. Most people do, even in the bleakest of situations. We always find a way through in the end.

Try and stay positive. I know this is so hard right now but you must try. Don't listen to your catastrophic thoughts because they are WRONG. Once you get carried away with negative thoughts you get swept into a place that's unrelenting.

One thing I always try and do is distract my mind by trying new things. The main thing is to get your primary attention away from the T and onto something else. One technique I also use is to turn negative situations into positive ones. So, learn the instrument you never did but always wanted to. Take up the dancing lessons that you missed out on. Change your career to the one you always wanted by going back to University, etc. Use your tinnitus situation as a catalyst to improve your life in another way. Then, mentally, you know that if it wasn't for tinnitus, your life wouldn't have improved for the better in another aspect.

 

[Nicola8478]

@Ed209 Thank you x

 

[glynis]

@Nicola8478,
It is hard loosing a parent and lost both of mine with in the last two years and know how your feeling .
Tinnitus can invade your life and the emotinal wobble it can cause .
Im glad you reached out to the Samaritans and look into some counselling and may be CBT.
Take things easy and go at your own pace and nice walks in the fresh air...
Relaxing music around you will help and lots of hugs...
Love glynis

 

[Nicola8478]

@glynis Thank you Glynis