Being like this for life

[Penelope33]

I keep thinking of a girl with t on the bta website, her words were 'we'll Ive got this for life so....' And she went on to explain how she masks the noise.
I feel so low at the thought of being like this forever. There are hardly any real success stories of it just going away. I know it's forever. Even the tinnitus man at my hosp said people rarely go back to having complete silence....
Sorry for the low post, I just can't see a way out, I feel like running away from my head for most of the time

 

[citigirl13]

I keep thinking of a girl with t on the bta website, her words were 'we'll Ive got this for life so....' And she went on to explain how she masks the noise.
I feel so low at the thought of being like this forever. There are hardly any real success stories of it just going away. I know it's forever. Even the tinnitus man at my hosp said people rarely go back to having complete silence....
Sorry for the low post, I just can't see a way out, I feel like running away from my head for most of the time

A woman where I work had T for months, and she said it sounded like a generator. Then one night she realised it had gone. Just like that. It does go for people. Unfortunately it just takes time. Even if it doesn't, there are upcoming treatments. I know with T it is hard to remain positive, but there are worse things. Just try to keep going with your usual routine and "fake it till you make it". I have noticed you have been struggling with this - are you talking with a therapist?

 

[Penelope33]

A woman where I work had T for months, and she said it sounded like a generator. Then one night she realised it had gone. Just like that. It does go for people. Unfortunately it just takes time. Even if it doesn't, there are upcoming treatments. I know with T it is hard to remain positive, but there are worse things. Just try to keep going with your usual routine and "fake it till you make it". I have noticed you have been struggling with this - are you talking with a therapist?

Yes I've had cbt, but not specifically for the t. More like the events upto and after t that have upset me. Good to hear about the lady at your work. Just hard to have hope. I like your fake it quote, I do that every day to some extent in front of my kids until they are asleep.... Then I'm a mess.

 

[James]

I think Tinnitus can change or the perception of it in our heads.
It can certainly get worse, or spike as the forum says.

Before I acquired the "Heavy-Duty Tinnitus" in my life,
mild Tinnitus seemed to get better with a Real Good nights sleep.
In other words, time for stress in our bodies to leave. It takes time to dissipate stress while sleeping, to leave your body.

I didn't think sleep could effect the Heavy-Duty Tinnitus, once you got it.
But my Doctors still point to stress in life in dealing with it, (maybe they don't have anything else to say).

No our bodies can't get younger by sleeping.
All I can say is, a Real Good nights sleep helped my bad pulsing Tinnitus.
The next day it was lower* , than the previous no-sleep night T-spike. *At least for half the day it seemed better.
Cut down on any excessive alcohol too, (which I enjoy),,,,,,, and I slept better. This is my latest theory.

 

[Mark McDill]

I keep thinking of a girl with t on the bta website, her words were 'we'll Ive got this for life so....' And she went on to explain how she masks the noise.
I feel so low at the thought of being like this forever. There are hardly any real success stories of it just going away. I know it's forever. Even the tinnitus man at my hosp said people rarely go back to having complete silence....
Sorry for the low post, I just can't see a way out, I feel like running away from my head for most of the time

Penelope
No worries about a low post (it's all good); so sorry you are feeling low (bummer!). I had a buddy that had T for five months and it went away; it does happen. Even if it doesn't go away; by no means does it have to rule your life, hold down, or hold you back in any way. I know that seems impossible for you right now; but eventually you get there (it took me over a year, but it just kind of clicked one week).

A challenge for you (and all T sufferers); at least this worked for me, maybe it will help you:

What kinds of things are you not able to do (but want to do) because of the T; or more precisely, because of the affects of T (depression, anxiety, fear, etc)? Pick one of those things and determine in your heart and mind to do it anyways; one foot in front of the other and just do it (T and all). This can be very difficult (indeed) but in doing so you will prove to yourself that T is not in charge unless you let it be in charge. Go work in the garden, go shopping, get your hair done, play with kids, build a fence, cook a great meal -- whatever -- and prove to yourself that no matter what (whether T goes away or T stays) that it is not in charge of you.

You will feel soooooo much better (start small, start slow, but start). It works!

Mark

 

[MaccyDee]

It's so much easier to let negativity and fear sweep over us, than it is to be hopeful and optimistic. No one wants to be disappointed.
But, if we allowed this negativity to take its toil on us, we could never be free. Fear is crippling, and it's a prison. You're the only one who can set yourself free of that. Don't let your own "what ifs" determine your life.
There is hope in all of this. Treatments are always available. Time is an amazing friend. Support is always by your side. You can make it. ( :

 

[I who love music]

Take action.
Don't measure your T .... the loudness .... when.. and where....
DO measure your response to it.
And pretty soon it gets as boring as measuring your response to the weather, or anything else.
Think about it.
We say, "I went uptown and the traffic was awful, I was in a hurry and I was freaking out." Freaking out is the response.
So instead of, "I got up this morning and my T was worse than yesterday morning." Say, "I got up this morning and my T was worse than yesterday morning, I felt a little anxious but while making breakfast, I didn't notice it."
For 40 years I've been trying to ignore T, accupressure it, drug it, get mad at it, drown it out, and I've read all kinds of books and articles about it.
Measuring my response to T seems to minimize it. I don't know how it works, but it's pretty cool.

 

[Grace]

Ive said this before but T is too unpredictable! And the normal reaction of getting is that im stuck with this for life! But you me or any doctor really cant say that, cause it has more many people gone away completely. Look at all the research and treatments that are in clinical trials for T and hearing disorders, and even ones that are being created! Its the 21st century, and the T mystery will be cracked soon. What i believe anyways, but best thing for now is too accept and live your life to the fullest.. Become use to it so you know longer care or even think about it. Very hard to imagine not being able to do that, but with proper counseling like TRT with a combination of drugs.. Your T will just be and like others said your reaction to it will diminish. People that write horror stories are not yet habuitated, which is nothing wrong because they need support from others even like myself, but they need to get to that point then there horror stories and neggative thinking will become success stories with positive thinking! Just hang in there and keep your spirits high and deffinally dont think your gonna have this for "life", but once your habuitated you may not even care if theres ever a cure.. But then a cure will sneak up on you

 

[michela]

Yes I've had cbt, but not specifically for the t. More like the events upto and after t that have upset me. Good to hear about the lady at your work. Just hard to have hope. I like your fake it quote, I do that every day to some extent in front of my kids until they are asleep.... Then I'm a mess.

penelope,you dont read much sucsess stories because people rarely come back to write about them,its like always in life,you only hear the negative things.like only when the plane crashes

 

[Penelope33]

Thanks everyone, just reading your kind words helps enormously. Much love to all.

 

[Suzie]

I am struggling I went to my therapist and PCP they both said I would get my life back....I am praying for some relief I have only had it for - week and can't imagine living life like this

 

[carol kane]

Penelope
No worries about a low post (it's all good); so sorry you are feeling low (bummer!). I had a buddy that had T for five months and it went away; it does happen. Even if it doesn't go away; by no means does it have to rule your life, hold down, or hold you back in any way. I know that seems impossible for you right now; but eventually you get there (it took me over a year, but it just kind of clicked one week).

A challenge for you (and all T sufferers); at least this worked for me, maybe it will help you:

What kinds of things are you not able to do (but want to do) because of the T; or more precisely, because of the affects of T (depression, anxiety, fear, etc)? Pick one of those things and determine in your heart and mind to do it anyways; one foot in front of the other and just do it (T and all). This can be very difficult (indeed) but in doing so you will prove to yourself that T is not in charge unless you let it be in charge. Go work in the garden, go shopping, get your hair done, play with kids, build a fence, cook a great meal -- whatever -- and prove to yourself that no matter what (whether T goes away or T stays) that it is not in charge of you.

You will feel soooooo much better (start small, start slow, but start). It works!

Mark

What a brilliant post... thanks Mark.

 

[Mark McDill]

I am struggling I went to my therapist and PCP they both said I would get my life back....I am praying for some relief I have only had it for - week and can't imagine living life like this

Suzie
Your first weeks are very traumatic and scary (sorry if I'm stating the obvious); I know I would never want to go back to the onset days of my T. You are in my prayers; I remember those days (sorry).

It is very easy (and very fatalistic) to project so much into your future. It is normal to do so (we all did it), but very debilitating and simply unnecessary. I projected the same thoughts -- how in the world is this even livable; I won't even repeat the thoughts that went through my head/heart. I'm sure you can relate.

You may or may not be aware that your anxiety and stress has a very adverse affect on T; furthermore, T has placed your brain in fight or flight mode -- sending your T even higher and really warping your outlook (everything looks/feels awful when in so much relentless anxiety and stress).

Do what you can to get your anxiety under control -- whatever you do to calm yourself down (breathing, yoga, prayer, athletics, whatever). Just work on relaxing (as impossible as that sounds right now). Get devices that can mask your T; I have hearing aids with white noise generators -- lots of relief!

Let me help you project a better -- far more realistic -- future. I, as do many others on this site, have very intrusive T and I have my life back. I do anything and everything I want to do and I'm able to maintain family, friends, career, et al just as before (T). I never thought I would get to this point (really!); but here I am. Trust me, you do get your life back (slowly, it takes a while) -- T does not ruin your life; it just makes you protect your ears a little more.

Prayers for you!!

Mark

 

[Suzie]

Thank you Mark it's hard to believe ill ever get my life back it gets so overwhelming

 

[Stina]

I know how you feel. I also had thoughts about my life being changed forever and me not being able to live like others. I felt that I was in a waiting line, waiting for a cure to come or to be healthy again. Then at some point i had so many other things happening in my life that I forgot about my tinnitus and focused on those things. I realize now that I was used to fixing things and having a certain ending point to problems. I know now that many problems in life are unsolvable and often we just have to accept the situation as it is, whether it be personal, social, political or environmental issues. And after all isn't life a little bit like a waiting line anyway, trying to prevent health problems and secure yourself economically and emotionally just to die eventually? Since we are mortal nothing that we do will matter eventually. The pain and joy we go through are only temporary and have no larger meaning (or not that we know of at least). Therefore if you say forever that might actually only mean 50-60 years. That often helps me minimize my problems.
Also, problems and pain often result in personal growth. Its like with working out - if your muscles are not sour every once in a while you are probably not developing. the key is to translate the negative experience into a positive one. If you have trouble doing that on your own, there are specialists for that (psychologists, psychotherapists, chaplains, pastors).

 

[Penelope33]

I know how you feel. I also had thoughts about my life being changed forever and me not being able to live like others. I felt that I was in a waiting line, waiting for a cure to come or to be healthy again. Then at some point i had so many other things happening in my life that I forgot about my tinnitus and focused on those things. I realize now that I was used to fixing things and having a certain ending point to problems. I know now that many problems in life are unsolvable and often we just have to accept the situation as it is, whether it be personal, social, political or environmental issues. And after all isn't life a little bit like a waiting line anyway, trying to prevent health problems and secure yourself economically and emotionally just to die eventually? Since we are mortal nothing that we do will matter eventually. The pain and joy we go through are only temporary and have no larger meaning (or not that we know of at least). Therefore if you say forever that might actually only mean 50-60 years. That often helps me minimize my problems.
Also, problems and pain often result in personal growth. Its like with working out - if your muscles are not sour every once in a while you are probably not developing. the key is to translate the negative experience into a positive one. If you have trouble doing that on your own, there are specialists for that (psychologists, psychotherapists, chaplains, pastors).

That's a very insightful and real post Stina and I thank you for posting that. You are going to do just fine, you're attitude is great! I wish I had your strength and believe me I'm trying to pull all I can to be like that. Big virtual hug ((((()))))