Can This Really Get Better? Need Support

[Danika]

Feeling really lost today....just so sad that this is happening and taking away from the joy of welcoming my 2nd son into the world.

Oddly this bad day comes after 2 really quiet days....also some progress.

When this first started it was so loud, I heard it over everything....I also couldnt sleep unless I played nature sounds on my headphones at night ( very low volume)

The t has gotten progressively quieter with some "spikes" I think are associated with stress/anxiety or congestion.

But it's tricky and plays mind games....sometimes I hear sounds that I think are my T....but they are not.
Sometimes I wonder is it getting quieter or am I just getting use to it.
I'm so hyper aware of sound....

I can now sleep with my head on the pillow for the most part. I sometimes wake up and think it louder but I go back to sleep. We always have a fan on in the bedroom but the t was heard over fan and tv in the beginning.

I'm so scared that delivery, a scheduled c section, will make this worse.

There are so few women out that who got T during pregnancy talking about it.....it seems for many it went away and most articles written about it says it goes away but those women disappear I guess. Only the ones who continue to suffer talk about it.
I want what no one can give me....to Know that this will go away.


The future is so unknown and I just have to wait and see....it scares me so much!
Can I go this
Can I be happy again
Can I be a good mom again (have a 5 yr old)
Can I beat this if it doesn't go away

I feel so alone and scared and sad......I feel so robbed of the joy this child should be bringing and so bad that this is part of his birth story......

 

[Binyamin]

Feeling really lost today....just so sad that this is happening and taking away from the joy of welcoming my 2nd son into the world.

Oddly this bad day comes after 2 really quiet days....also some progress.

When this first started it was so loud, I heard it over everything....I also couldnt sleep unless I played nature sounds on my headphones at night ( very low volume)

The t has gotten progressively quieter with some "spikes" I think are associated with stress/anxiety or congestion.

But it's tricky and plays mind games....sometimes I hear sounds that I think are my T....but they are not.
Sometimes I wonder is it getting quieter or am I just getting use to it.
I'm so hyper aware of sound....

I can now sleep with my head on the pillow for the most part. I sometimes wake up and think it louder but I go back to sleep. We always have a fan on in the bedroom but the t was heard over fan and tv in the beginning.

I'm so scared that delivery, a scheduled c section, will make this worse.

There are so few women out that who got T during pregnancy talking about it.....it seems for many it went away and most articles written about it says it goes away but those women disappear I guess. Only the ones who continue to suffer talk about it.
I want what no one can give me....to Know that this will go away.


The future is so unknown and I just have to wait and see....it scares me so much!
Can I go this
Can I be happy again
Can I be a good mom again (have a 5 yr old)
Can I beat this if it doesn't go away

I feel so alone and scared and sad......I feel so robbed of the joy this child should be bringing and so bad that this is part of his birth story......

Hi I'm sorry to hear you're having a hard time. If you read around in the website a little you can see that having an anxiety outbreak when first experiencing tinnitus is pretty common (as I had as well). As you said no one can promise you that
Your tinnitus will fully go away but as to the other questions:
Yes you can be happy again

I'm sure you never stopped being a good mother. The fact that it's your child that you are worried about is proof

And yes you can beat it even if doesn't go away (and there is a good chance that it will go away)

It is important that you go to your docter. Tinnitus usually doesn't mean anything dangerous, but it is very important you go to the doctor to sort things out.

And as for your statement about not being sure if it getting better or if you are getting used to it. I'm not sure how much it matters. If it's better that's fabulous and if you're getting used to it and it stops bothering you, that's also pretty great.

Hope you feel better soon

 

[Danika]

Thank you!!

 

[Samantha R]

@Danika
You are going to be fine.
I know the struggle, we all face it and come out the other side.
I ended up having to check myself into a private psychiatric facility when the twins were 9 weeks old. I was so lost and distressed. For 2 weeks, I was only allowed to see the twins and my 2 year old for 2 hours a day as this psychiatrist thought that was best.
I was beside myself and the nurses there got me into a mother and baby unit where I could get help and be with my babies.
I felt so robbed, I had lost precious time with my babies and also meant it was nearly impossible to establish breastfeeding.
I turned the corner when I went to the mother baby unit. I needed to get on top
of my sleep and the anxiety and depression. Mirtazapine helped and now, 7 months down the track, I am doing better.
I made myself a promise that I would enjoy my time with the kids, and I am living that, even on my 'down' days.
Why am I telling you this?
Because I know you are despairing, but I also know you will be ok. The best advice I ever got was from a nurse I met who told me she had tinnitus as well. Do not listen for it, do not monitor it. I stopped going to quiet rooms to see what it was doing, I stopped plugging my ears and talking to my husband about it.
Yours may go, realistically given you have a couple of good reasons why you may have it.