Well... My life is never gonna be easy again. I can't accept it because I think there must be something that can be done. When I first got my T I was spiraling down in a oh so familiar low self-esteem whole.
To try and make a timeline I went back in my search history to see what I was doing. The night I got T I was watching youtube videos on volume 2 (on a macbook scale) and searching for ways to make myself better (that's my issue, I'm never good enough).
As soon as it started I said "it will go away, I'm just tired." I want to bed and it was still there, but I didn't have time to think about that. I was putting a lot of pressure of myself bcd then and the day after T I sat and cried in a bus... the stress got to me.
The following night T woke me up and i cried for a good two hours. then I did the same thing next night... except there did happened something that night. I was laying on my side and the T travelled from one ear to another in a weird way and then disappeared only to return again.
I then went to the ENT and she told me to wait 3 months. I did and it was still there. I was still spiraling down and I am only know trying not to be so harsh n myself. went to another ENT and she just said "bad luck" and send me home crying (that night the T got worse...).
I then started fighting and went to the physiotherapist and there is a lot muscle wise wrong. I tried an exercise where I pulled my ear and something went wrong because I for dizzy all day and couldn't stand straight.
I had sinus infection just a week prior to T and maybe I sparked or pulled some inflammation?
All I know is that I didn't feel good the next couple of days and my ears was so irritated.
I don't know what to do! everything is such a roller costar.
Is there hope it will go away at some point?
To try and make a timeline I went back in my search history to see what I was doing. The night I got T I was watching youtube videos on volume 2 (on a macbook scale) and searching for ways to make myself better (that's my issue, I'm never good enough).
As soon as it started I said "it will go away, I'm just tired." I want to bed and it was still there, but I didn't have time to think about that. I was putting a lot of pressure of myself bcd then and the day after T I sat and cried in a bus... the stress got to me.
The following night T woke me up and i cried for a good two hours. then I did the same thing next night... except there did happened something that night. I was laying on my side and the T travelled from one ear to another in a weird way and then disappeared only to return again.
I then went to the ENT and she told me to wait 3 months. I did and it was still there. I was still spiraling down and I am only know trying not to be so harsh n myself. went to another ENT and she just said "bad luck" and send me home crying (that night the T got worse...).
I then started fighting and went to the physiotherapist and there is a lot muscle wise wrong. I tried an exercise where I pulled my ear and something went wrong because I for dizzy all day and couldn't stand straight.
I had sinus infection just a week prior to T and maybe I sparked or pulled some inflammation?
All I know is that I didn't feel good the next couple of days and my ears was so irritated.
I don't know what to do! everything is such a roller costar.
Is there hope it will go away at some point?