I don't see how ear stiffness would directly cause T.
It does though. It is explained in a paper I read I think on pubmed - described by fluid mechanic equations even. If I recall correctly it has to deal with the way the fluid in the inner ear is impacted by the lack of mobility of the stapes brought on by the disease. It's not the only kind of T you can get from otosclerosis, but if I recall correctly it is characterized by low frequencies.
Why do people with ear wax impactions sometimes get tinnitus then? People also get tinnitus when in a sound proof room. There's ambient sound everywhere and if hearing loss is 30db+ then it's like being in a soundproof room for certain frequencies because most ambient sound usually isn't that loud. I would think that hearing aids counteract this.
There are types of T that are brought on by lack of auditory input indeed, but it's not the first thing that comes to mind when someone may be affected by otosclerosis (because there's a much bigger elephant in that room).
At any rate, I don't think the hearing aids will hurt, so it's not a bad idea to give it a shot if just to try to hear better.
The specialist I talked to said that it isn't bad enough for surgery due to the risks.
It seems to me the risk assessment should be done by the patient (i.e. you). Only you can decide if the risk is worth taking, based on the impact it has on your quality of life. His job is to give you all the data you need to make your decision, and of course there's nothing wrong with him giving you his opinion about it.
One piece of data I collected (again, via pubmed studies) is that you have about 50/50 chance of getting rid of T after surgery, but also a small chance of making T worse (in the single digit % if I remember well).
Also it might not be otosclerosis because there's no way to check inside the middle ear.
Whether it's otosclerosis or not is independent from the ability to check inside the middle ear (maybe you meant that there is no way to confirm it?).
In addition to this, there
is a way to look inside the middle ear through exploratory surgery (which involves going through your ear drum).
However, that's not the first thing you'd want to do anyways: otosclerosis is diagnosed through a bunch of tests: fork/rinne test, hearing test (looking for air-bone gaps, carhart notch), ear drum inspection (schwarz sign), ct-scan (look for radiolucencies indicative of focus), etc...
I don't know anyone who has gone ahead with exploratory surgery. When I decided on surgery, I gave the go ahead to my surgeon and he obviously wasn't going to proceed if he had found out that I didn't have otosclerosis the moment he opened up the ear drum to take a look at the stapes. So in a way it's not super useful to have exploratory surgery (maybe that's why he told you there's no way to look in there).
When I went to my GP doctor I was told that I could get an audiogram if I wanted to but it doesn't matter because there's nothing that could be done to fix hearing.
The role of the meds isn't to fix your hearing: it's to prevent it from degrading further.