Earplugs in the Shower (the Occlusion Effect): Don't Do It!

[Tavia R]

I love traveling. So is that off the list for 3 years?

I understand, traveling is really hard for me too because of how much pain the noise of driving puts me in. However, my favorite place in the world is a three hour drive from where I live and I know that the drive up there going to be excruciating, but I also know that the drive home is never as bad because I'm so happy from having spent time in the most beautiful place, doing my favorite things, enjoying the silence, and being with my family. There's just things that we have to decide if they are worth it, and for me at least, sitting in a car for 3 hours with ear plugs shoved in underneath my huge peltor ear muffs and trying not to cry is very much worth it.
I'm sorry it's very hard for you though, I hope you're able to find a way to make traveling for comfortable

 

[East]

Do you guys get an immediate spike after your showers?? That's so scary, because I love showers and find that a warm shower will actually alleviate my symptoms for an hour or so afterwards. Not sure if it's from the warm water loosening tense muscles, or just the sort of white noise the shower makes.

 

[Bill Bauer]

I am in the U.S...

Beginning about a year after the onset (who knows, it could have been safe to do this earlier) I had flown on Boeing planes while wearing noise cancelling headphones over plugs, and I ended up being ok.

 

[Tara Lyons]

Ears take months to heal, so you will want to wait 1-3 months every time you try something to attempt to see whether or not it works. Luckily, your body can heal itself and even overcome things that you do that interfere with recovery, and the simple act of waiting is often all that one needs to do to experience improvement.

The noise scares me. This is the problem

 

[Tara Lyons]

Do you guys get an immediate spike after your showers?? That's so scary, because I love showers and find that a warm shower will actually alleviate my symptoms for an hour or so afterwards. Not sure if it's from the warm water loosening tense muscles, or just the sort of white noise the shower makes.

I used to but haven't been as bad. Hope that's a good thing. I drove 4 hours without ear plugs then took a shower the next night and I felt like my ears were on fire after. Never again.

 

[Bill Bauer]

The noise scares me. This is the problem

It's ok to be fearful of scary things that can have a permanent negative impact on your life. After 2-3 years, your hyperacusis will likely be completely gone, and your tinnitus will stabilize (probably at a quiet level)(stabilization means that it will take a lot more to cause a spike than it does now). At That point you will naturally stop being worried about the noise.

The bottom line - don't be too concerned about the natural yearning to avoid noise. At the same time you don't want this to be debilitating. It gets debilitating for a handful of people, but the vast majority is able to be reasonable about noise avoidance.

Make sure to not wear earplugs 24/7 - you don't want to get a debilitating fear of sounds. You should be spending most of your time somewhere where you don't have to wear hearing protection. If you wear muffs for half an hour a couple of days a week, there is no way for this healthy fear of noises to become debilitating.

Here are three posts on this topic that I found to be sensible:

I didn't read all the above comments, but did peruse a fair amount of it, and ran across many good points on both sides of the argument. What strikes me is there seems to be an underlying assumption (of course I may be wrong on this) that all brains and neurological systems are created equal. The way I see it, that's simply not the case, so everybody's way of dealing with tinnitus and/or hyperacusis is going to have to be highly individualized.

I read a book many years ago called "Adrenal Syndrome". A lot of the book touched on the residual resiliency of people's adrenal glands as they respond to life's stresses. Very low resiliency often resulted in months/years of chronic debilitating exhaustion following a stressful event(s) in their lives. Very high resiliency indicated essentially the opposite. The author broke this down into some rough numbers:

25% of people have low resiliency, meaning normal life stressors will often send them into some degree of a tailspin.
25% of people have high resiliency, meaning that no matter how severe a stressor comes into their lives, they will be able to cope without becoming debilitated to any degree.
50% of people fall somewhere inbetween.

I believe there are some kind of corresponding numbers for a person's brain and neurological resiliency as well, which can greatly affect the ability to cope with tinnitus. (I believe adrenal resiliency also plays a major role in our ability to cope). -- Based on these assumptions, it's pretty easy for me to conclude that what may be overprotection for one person will be underprotection for another, and vice versa.

I think the main point to understand for someone new to tinnitus is that their path forward is going to be a lot of "testing the waters". Generally, IMHO, it's going to take a few weeks or months to get important insights that will help us achieve a healthy balance. In all likelihood, most people are going to learn from experience when their over-protecting or under-protecting.

I've come to believe however, that in those early months, if one is going to err in either direction, it should be toward overprotection. It just seems to me the consequences of underprotection (which could result in permanent injury) in those early times are much more dire than the consequences of overprotection--which as I understand, generally results in temporary setbacks.

Doing a number of things to better support the brain and neurological system and the body's stress response (adrenal glands) is quite high on my list of recommendations I would make to anybody with tinnitus. Doing so might even prevent phonophobia or OCD, etc., as we go through our learning curves -- Just my 2 cents worth.

Relative newbies to tinnitus are likely to find all the information/opinions above quite confusing. So here are a few common-sense rules to follow:

1. The best protection of all is avoidance. Even the best earplugs can't guarantee complete hearing protection so those relatively new to tinnitus are best advised to avoid prolonged loud noise exposure - especially amplified sound at for example live concerts and sports events. This may involve lifestyle changes.

2. When in doubt, use hearing protection. In the many tasks we all do through the week, some will inevitably involve exposure to noise - which may be at higher levels than we at first realise - so using hearing protection for many of these is only sensible.

3. Build quiet into your day. It's not a good idea to be wearing hearing protection all the time - so you need to give your ears a break by ensuring that there will be quieter times during your day when hearing protection isn't necessary.This may involve changing your routine. Use soft masking noise and light music (not using headphones) to avoid "silence" where tinnitus is most noticeable.

4. Don't stress about stress. Tinnitus newbies are forever being told that the thing which makes tinnitus worse is stress. But while it's true that how you are feeling at a particular moment can make tinnitus temporarily louder, it won't have a lasting effect. But prolonged loud noise exposure can make tinnitus permanently louder. So don't stress about stress - but do be concerned about noise.

The ongoing debate about overprotection seems to be more nuanced than many like to believe.

I've been dealing with tendonitis injuries in both arms for the past year and the research and experience from that seems to establish the idea of reinjury while there is still inflammation. It's a paradoxical situation because the injury can't fully heal if you overprotect but if you do use them you risk making the injury worse. The solution seems to be to get the inflammation down so that you can build strength and recover without further harming yourself.

I believe this is what happened with my tinnitus. After the initial injury I slowly recovered to a level where I was still functional and able to go about my daily activities. Since a second injury a year later it's been a repeated pattern of reinjury and overprotect. The second exposure seems to have made me more susceptible to further damage from things that wouldn't have previously been an issue. I have been experiencing permanent spikes and new tones on average 2 to 3 times per year. The notion of just exposing yourself to everyday sounds to reduce sensitivity doesn't seem to work IF THERE IS CHRONIC INFLAMMATION. When I take aggressive measures to reduce inflammation I'm able to expose myself to reasonable levels of noise and slowly reduce my sensitivity. With the inflammation still present I'm much more likely to reinjure my hearing and increase my tinnitus.

And here is a meme that will hopefully make you feel better about staying away from loud events

 

[Spiral]

Taking a shower without earplugs masks the tinnitus but soon it roars afterwards. When wearing earplugs in the shower it generally remains the same level with no spike, so in go earplugs for me.

 

[Mister Muso]

Do you have sound sensitivity?

Yes I have hyperacusis. At the time of the flights, I had difficulty tolerating the sound of running taps and flushing toilets, and even my own voice. I don't think hyperacusis is necessarily a factor when it comes to flying though, except at take-off and landing. By double-protecting with EarPlanes earplugs and ear defenders though, it wasn't as bad as I had feared.

And they were nearly all Boeing jets. 3 flights on the way home - that's 3 take-offs and 3 landings - and I did get a tinnitus spike lasting a few days, but that's nothing unusual for me.

 

[Tara Lyons]

It's ok to be fearful of scary things that can have a permanent negative impact on your life. After 2-3 years, your hyperacusis will likely be completely gone, and your tinnitus will stabilize (probably at a quiet level)(stabilization means that it will take a lot more to cause a spike than it does now). At That point you will naturally stop being worried about the noise.

The bottom line - don't be too concerned about the natural yearning to avoid noise. At the same time you don't want this to be debilitating. It gets debilitating for a handful of people, but the vast majority is able to be reasonable about noise avoidance.

Make sure to not wear earplugs 24/7 - you don't want to get a debilitating fear of sounds. You should be spending most of your time somewhere where you don't have to wear hearing protection. If you wear muffs for half an hour a couple of days a week, there is no way for this healthy fear of noises to become debilitating.

Here are three posts on this topic that I found to be sensible:

And here is a meme that will hopefully make you feel better about staying away from loud events
View attachment 39262

I'm kind of scared about work. It's an open area, lots of people, phones, speakers, fans etc...

 

[Bill Bauer]

I'm kind of scared about work. It's an open area, lots of people, phones, speakers, fans etc...

I have been wearing earplugs when I sleep. So while it isn't ideal to wear earplugs 8 hours a day, it shouldn't cause any problems (provided your ear canals are completely dry when you insert the earplugs).

 

[Tara Lyons]

I understand, traveling is really hard for me too because of how much pain the noise of driving puts me in. However, my favorite place in the world is a three hour drive from where I live and I know that the drive up there going to be excruciating, but I also know that the drive home is never as bad because I'm so happy from having spent time in the most beautiful place, doing my favorite things, enjoying the silence, and being with my family. There's just things that we have to decide if they are worth it, and for me at least, sitting in a car for 3 hours with ear plugs shoved in underneath my huge peltor ear muffs and trying not to cry is very much worth it.
I'm sorry it's very hard for you though, I hope you're able to find a way to make traveling for comfortable

Hi, it's hard for me but I know I don't have it nearly as bad as other people. I'm just used to my silence, and at 32 years old this is probably my first major health issue. Maybe it's not major to other people, or an annoyance at best, but I hate everything about silence being stolen from me and not being able to be in a room with 5 people because it kills my ears.

I don't know when any of this starts getting better. Is sound sensitivity the same as hyperacusis? From what I read true hyperacusis is rare. I don't know. Things irritate me for sure. My ears were pretty calm today, because I wasn't exposed to a lot of noise. I played some music and got this weird roaring. Took a shower with earplugs, they didn't freak out too much. Drove 4 hours without earplugs a few weeks ago, will never do that again. They were blaring, ringing to the point I had to sleep to get away from it, it was so bad.

ugh. I'm sorry to complain to you. I've seen your posts. I still go to work every day, I'm just depressed from all of this.

 

[Bill Bauer]

I played some music and got this weird roaring.

Next time you might want to use the maximum volume that doesn't result in a change in volume of your tinnitus.

 

[Tara Lyons]

Next time you might want to use the maximum volume that doesn't result in a change in volume of your tinnitus.

The maximum volume? I thought this roaring was a reaction to noise due to the hyperacusis?

 

[Bill Bauer]

The maximum volume? I thought this roaring was a reaction to noise due to the hyperacusis?

What I was saying is that you want to lower the volume until the point when it stops causing spikes. Right now you just want to stop the spikes and give yourself several months to heal. After that you might want to gradually increase the volume. Of course every time you increase the volume and it is too much and you have a spike, you will want to drop back to the last volume that hasn't resulted in spikes and stay there for a couple of months. You will also want to keep the time of exposure short whenever you are experimenting with a higher volume.

 

[PeteJ]

Oh Christ I've been doing this.

He's a rare case. It doesn't make sense.

 

[PeteJ]

What are you supposed to do if the shower is loud? There's also a plumbing problem. I thought of buying one of those attachment hoses but I don't know if that will solve it?

The occlusion effect doesn't seem loud, just awfully annoying.

I want an alternative.

Would like a haircut and want to use a trimmer or razor one day but I guess the occlusion effect is bad for that too?

 

[Tara Lyons]

What I was saying is that you want to lower the volume until the point when it stops causing spikes. Right now you just want to stop the spikes and give yourself several months to heal. After that you might want to gradually increase the volume. Of course every time you increase the volume and it is too much and you have a spike, you will want to drop back to the last volume that hasn't resulted in spikes and stay there for a couple of months. You will also want to keep the time of exposure short whenever you are experimenting with a higher volume.

I'm crying. I can't take this. How do people live with this!!!! ;(

 

[Bill Bauer]

I'm crying. I can't take this.

I had also been feeling this way for the first six months after the onset. I began feeling a little better after that. I know of some people whose tinnitus hasn't improved, but who had experienced habituation. A lot of the time habituation seems to begin about 2.5-3 years after the onset. It is a long process, but at least it is likely not the case that you will have to struggle with it for the rest of your life. Of course in addition to fading and/or habituation, there are also all of those potential cures in the pipeline. There is something like a 25-50% chance that within 5-10 years there will be treatments for tinnitus.

Please check out the post below for the experiences of a long time user here who was part of a trial and who had actually gotten better(!)
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/suicidal.31839/#post-452473

 

[Bill Bauer]

Here is another quote by @kelpiemsp
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/mutebutton.124/page-81#post-416875

Yup the days before I was part of the bimodal stimulation trial. T'was no fun. No fun at all.

And by days I mean years. And by years I mean decades.

 

[Bill Bauer]

@Tara Lyons , @serendipity1996
I forgot to tag you to ensure that you will see my message. Check out my message above.

 

[Tavia R]

I'm sorry to complain to you. I've seen your posts. I still go to work every day, I'm just depressed from all of this.

Not at all hon, this isn't a pissing post competition as to who has it the worst. Right now I feel guilty acting like my life is falling apart because my dear next door neighbor is going through chemo and radiation and may not survive. Could you imagine? We just have to acknowledge the fact that we all have what we've got and we can't compare it to anyone else. Some may have it "worse," but that in no way discredits the pain, emotionally or physically, that we're all going through.

Is sound sensitivity the same as hyperacusis?

Yes as far as I know they are different, but in my opinion it technically doesn't matter. I've had doctors swear up and down that I don't have hyperacusis I'm just phonophobic, and other doctors just straight up diagnose me. It doesn't matter really, except for being treated medically I would say. Pain is pain. Don't feel like an imposter or like you don't belong because you "just have noise sensitivity." Screw anyone that says different.
And with the tinnitus, honey I can tell you I can relate. Sometimes, it feels like you're in a little bubble that you can't escape from, how could you? I feel with every other hard thing I've ever gone through in life I could always escape it for hours or days at a time by running away, but when it's your own body that is killing you there's no escaping. But, I can tell you one of the major things that's helped me manage that bubble is some advice my therapist gave me. For me, I have constant migraine auras as well that are like visual tinnitus so I have my hearing and my sight going against me along with pain, but we have other senses that we can dive into that aren't killing us. Right now I think I would murder someone if I didn't get my daily bath with scented candles burning along side. The warm water and smell ground me, give me something physical to latch onto that is actually pleasant. It makes it seem like I'm in control of my body again, like there's more to it then just all the crap I've been through. There's of course other ways of indulging in the senses, but this is my favorite.
I'm sorry you're not doing well, go ahead and send me a personal message if you need to at any time.

 

[Tavia R]

I'm crying. I can't take this. How do people live with this!!!! ;(

I'll tell you how I live and hopefully some part will speak to you.

First, I have to believe that life is beautiful, that it's worth it. I believe that there are moments and people that make it so. I have my family that loves me so much and a dear friend that comes rushing over when I'm having a breakdown. I love to feel the sunshine on my skin and fresh shortbread cookies crumbling in my mouth. I dance in the kitchen all alone without music, refuse to paint my nails anything but dark red, and love the way a sundress brushes against my legs when I walk. These kinds of things are so small, so insignificantly small, but in the moment that I enjoy them is a moment that I'm reminded that there is beauty and happiness in the world; it's like finally taking a breath after feeling I'd suffocate. I live for these moments. I wake up in terrible pain with my ears screaming and auras flashing in my vision, but I know as soon as I open my bedroom door I'm going to be greeted with a toothy, 7 year old grin saying "good morning Tavia." It's that same brother that panics every time I have a pain attack and am doubled over that he rushes over to give me a kiss and repeatedly tell me he loves me. I might be going through a lot of crap, but how could I not be greatful and touched by a moment like that?

I made taking care of myself my top priority. Honestly, the world just revolves around me right now and I've had to learn that it's okay and definitely not selfish. I've had to learn to be compassionate to myself, validating what I'm going through and that it's okay that I'm struggling. I'm delicate with myself, using kind words and treating myself to hair masks, self manicures, and whatever else I want to please me. You are already going through enough, there is no need to hurt yourself worse with self judgement and thoughts of "Do I really have it that bad? Maybe if I could just suck it up and be stronger I could live my life and stop being a burden to my family and friends." I did this for much too long when I was first coming down with hyperacusis. I wish I could just go back and give that girl I was the self compassion she needed instead of the doubts and judgement I was beating her with.

I sat down with a google doc entitled "My Identity, I am..." and wrote out everything that made me myself that my medical conditions could never take from me no matter how hard they try. I have pages of bullet points, things like "the only person at culinary school with enough spine to stick their hand into 300 degree F boiling sugar," and "the girl who wears leather jackets with sundresses and too tall high heels." I sat and read through all these things, that probably would have seemed stupid or insignificant to someone else, but to me it was a revelation to see there was pages and pages of little details about me outlining who I was. I'm me - I'm not my pain, I'm not the screaming in my ears, I'm not my condition. We spend so long living in those we forget who we are underneath it all. This was the turning point in my depression. I went from living in constant misery to being able to handle everything much better with more episodes of happiness. I can't recommend this enough, I would have done it months ago had I known how positively it would affect my attitude and ability to handle what I'm going through.

I believe that I'm going to come out of this a better person. Every single time I've gone through something difficult in my life I've always come out on top and I've come out better. Growing up with an abusive sister was absolute hell, but now I am an incredibly kind person and can't stand to watch bullying and not go down guns blazing. I wouldn't have asked for an experience like that, in fact the best day of my life was when she moved out, but looking at who I am now just amazes me how we can grow from our experiences in hell and makes me glad I went through it. My point is, it's comforting for me to be curious about who I am becoming. Someone that can handle anything? Someone that can lift others out of their pain and give understanding? I'm not sure quite yet, but I can't wait to meet her, to become her. You're going to become stronger too, someone new, someone who can deal with things that your current self has no idea how you would ever get through. When I first heard of hyperacusis during my internet research trying to figure out what was wrong with my ears, I read a story online of a man that had it and how debilitated he was. I thought "How awful, I could never live through that, what a miserable existence." Lo and behold, here I am 6 months later at the same level of debilitation and, miraculously, living through it. We adapt, we grow stronger, we become better as a person. You'd be amazed at just how strong you really are and can become.

I know that religion isn't for everyone, but even before this tragedy of health hit me like a truck I was a strong believer that trials are the effect of living in a mortal world and are absolutely necessary for us to learn to become more like God. I've become closer to him as I pray more, pray for strength to get through. I've had times where I told God that I couldn't do it anymore and He was going to have to take the load that day. And He did. I wasn't magically better, the pain wasn't taken away, and I wasn't suddenly happy; but I could finally get out of bed for the first time in days, the pit of depression that weighed so heavy in my stomach I felt it was going to pull me down through the ground was lightened, and the pain wasn't so terribly excruciating that I could get through my day without any breakdowns. It was as if someone was bearing the load with me, making it just light enough that I could handle it again. I believe what I'm going through is God's way of teaching me to rely on Him, His atonement, and His healing power. I don't expect a miracle, I have far to much to learn before this is taken from me. After all, in my religion we believe we all chose to come here, chose to go through what we do, that our spirits knew what we would have to bear so we could learn to be more like our Heavenly Father. If religion isn't your thing though, I understand, I just know I would not be surviving without it.

Get on the forum and reach out to us. @aot has gotten me through quite a few of those times I was so miserable I couldn't breath, and for that I owe him a world of thanks. Seriously, I'm not spewing crap when I say you can message me any time and I'm sure there are plenty more of us on here who would say the exact same. We're all on here to support each other. Never be embarrassed to break down or freak out, we've all been there and no one is judging.

 

[Tara Lyons]

I'll tell you how I live and hopefully some part will speak to you.

First, I have to believe that life is beautiful, that it's worth it. I believe that there are moments and people that make it so. I have my family that loves me so much and a dear friend that comes rushing over when I'm having a breakdown. I love to feel the sunshine on my skin and fresh shortbread cookies crumbling in my mouth. I dance in the kitchen all alone without music, refuse to paint my nails anything but dark red, and love the way a sundress brushes against my legs when I walk. These kinds of things are so small, so insignificantly small, but in the moment that I enjoy them is a moment that I'm reminded that there is beauty and happiness in the world; it's like finally taking a breath after feeling I'd suffocate. I live for these moments. I wake up in terrible pain with my ears screaming and auras flashing in my vision, but I know as soon as I open my bedroom door I'm going to be greeted with a toothy, 7 year old grin saying "good morning Tavia." It's that same brother that panics every time I have a pain attack and am doubled over that he rushes over to give me a kiss and repeatedly tell me he loves me. I might be going through a lot of crap, but how could I not be greatful and touched by a moment like that?

I made taking care of myself my top priority. Honestly, the world just revolves around me right now and I've had to learn that it's okay and definitely not selfish. I've had to learn to be compassionate to myself, validating what I'm going through and that it's okay that I'm struggling. I'm delicate with myself, using kind words and treating myself to hair masks, self manicures, and whatever else I want to please me. You are already going through enough, there is no need to hurt yourself worse with self judgement and thoughts of "Do I really have it that bad? Maybe if I could just suck it up and be stronger I could live my life and stop being a burden to my family and friends." I did this for much too long when I was first coming down with hyperacusis. I wish I could just go back and give that girl I was the self compassion she needed instead of the doubts and judgement I was beating her with.

I sat down with a google doc entitled "My Identity, I am..." and wrote out everything that made me myself that my medical conditions could never take from me no matter how hard they try. I have pages of bullet points, things like "the only person at culinary school with enough spine to stick their hand into 300 degree F boiling sugar," and "the girl who wears leather jackets with sundresses and too tall high heels." I sat and read through all these things, that probably would have seemed stupid or insignificant to someone else, but to me it was a revelation to see there was pages and pages of little details about me outlining who I was. I'm me - I'm not my pain, I'm not the screaming in my ears, I'm not my condition. We spend so long living in those we forget who we are underneath it all. This was the turning point in my depression. I went from living in constant misery to being able to handle everything much better with more episodes of happiness. I can't recommend this enough, I would have done it months ago had I known how positively it would affect my attitude and ability to handle what I'm going through.

I believe that I'm going to come out of this a better person. Every single time I've gone through something difficult in my life I've always come out on top and I've come out better. Growing up with an abusive sister was absolute hell, but now I am an incredibly kind person and can't stand to watch bullying and not go down guns blazing. I wouldn't have asked for an experience like that, in fact the best day of my life was when she moved out, but looking at who I am now just amazes me how we can grow from our experiences in hell and makes me glad I went through it. My point is, it's comforting for me to be curious about who I am becoming. Someone that can handle anything? Someone that can lift others out of their pain and give understanding? I'm not sure quite yet, but I can't wait to meet her, to become her. You're going to become stronger too, someone new, someone who can deal with things that your current self has no idea how you would ever get through. When I first heard of hyperacusis during my internet research trying to figure out what was wrong with my ears, I read a story online of a man that had it and how debilitated he was. I thought "How awful, I could never live through that, what a miserable existence." Lo and behold, here I am 6 months later at the same level of debilitation and, miraculously, living through it. We adapt, we grow stronger, we become better as a person. You'd be amazed at just how strong you really are and can become.

I know that religion isn't for everyone, but even before this tragedy of health hit me like a truck I was a strong believer that trials are the effect of living in a mortal world and are absolutely necessary for us to learn to become more like God. I've become closer to him as I pray more, pray for strength to get through. I've had times where I told God that I couldn't do it anymore and He was going to have to take the load that day. And He did. I wasn't magically better, the pain wasn't taken away, and I wasn't suddenly happy; but I could finally get out of bed for the first time in days, the pit of depression that weighed so heavy in my stomach I felt it was going to pull me down through the ground was lightened, and the pain wasn't so terribly excruciating that I could get through my day without any breakdowns. It was as if someone was bearing the load with me, making it just light enough that I could handle it again. I believe what I'm going through is God's way of teaching me to rely on Him, His atonement, and His healing power. I don't expect a miracle, I have far to much to learn before this is taken from me. After all, in my religion we believe we all chose to come here, chose to go through what we do, that our spirits knew what we would have to bear so we could learn to be more like our Heavenly Father. If religion isn't your thing though, I understand, I just know I would not be surviving without it.

Get on the forum and reach out to us. @aot has gotten me through quite a few of those times I was so miserable I couldn't breath, and for that I owe him a world of thanks. Seriously, I'm not spewing crap when I say you can message me any time and I'm sure there are plenty more of us on here who would say the exact same. We're all on here to support each other. Never be embarrassed to break down or freak out, we've all been there and no one is judging.

Thank you for this... I'll write back tomorrow after I get some sleep.

 

[Tara Lyons]

I'll tell you how I live and hopefully some part will speak to you.

First, I have to believe that life is beautiful, that it's worth it. I believe that there are moments and people that make it so. I have my family that loves me so much and a dear friend that comes rushing over when I'm having a breakdown. I love to feel the sunshine on my skin and fresh shortbread cookies crumbling in my mouth. I dance in the kitchen all alone without music, refuse to paint my nails anything but dark red, and love the way a sundress brushes against my legs when I walk. These kinds of things are so small, so insignificantly small, but in the moment that I enjoy them is a moment that I'm reminded that there is beauty and happiness in the world; it's like finally taking a breath after feeling I'd suffocate. I live for these moments. I wake up in terrible pain with my ears screaming and auras flashing in my vision, but I know as soon as I open my bedroom door I'm going to be greeted with a toothy, 7 year old grin saying "good morning Tavia." It's that same brother that panics every time I have a pain attack and am doubled over that he rushes over to give me a kiss and repeatedly tell me he loves me. I might be going through a lot of crap, but how could I not be greatful and touched by a moment like that?

I made taking care of myself my top priority. Honestly, the world just revolves around me right now and I've had to learn that it's okay and definitely not selfish. I've had to learn to be compassionate to myself, validating what I'm going through and that it's okay that I'm struggling. I'm delicate with myself, using kind words and treating myself to hair masks, self manicures, and whatever else I want to please me. You are already going through enough, there is no need to hurt yourself worse with self judgement and thoughts of "Do I really have it that bad? Maybe if I could just suck it up and be stronger I could live my life and stop being a burden to my family and friends." I did this for much too long when I was first coming down with hyperacusis. I wish I could just go back and give that girl I was the self compassion she needed instead of the doubts and judgement I was beating her with.

I sat down with a google doc entitled "My Identity, I am..." and wrote out everything that made me myself that my medical conditions could never take from me no matter how hard they try. I have pages of bullet points, things like "the only person at culinary school with enough spine to stick their hand into 300 degree F boiling sugar," and "the girl who wears leather jackets with sundresses and too tall high heels." I sat and read through all these things, that probably would have seemed stupid or insignificant to someone else, but to me it was a revelation to see there was pages and pages of little details about me outlining who I was. I'm me - I'm not my pain, I'm not the screaming in my ears, I'm not my condition. We spend so long living in those we forget who we are underneath it all. This was the turning point in my depression. I went from living in constant misery to being able to handle everything much better with more episodes of happiness. I can't recommend this enough, I would have done it months ago had I known how positively it would affect my attitude and ability to handle what I'm going through.

I believe that I'm going to come out of this a better person. Every single time I've gone through something difficult in my life I've always come out on top and I've come out better. Growing up with an abusive sister was absolute hell, but now I am an incredibly kind person and can't stand to watch bullying and not go down guns blazing. I wouldn't have asked for an experience like that, in fact the best day of my life was when she moved out, but looking at who I am now just amazes me how we can grow from our experiences in hell and makes me glad I went through it. My point is, it's comforting for me to be curious about who I am becoming. Someone that can handle anything? Someone that can lift others out of their pain and give understanding? I'm not sure quite yet, but I can't wait to meet her, to become her. You're going to become stronger too, someone new, someone who can deal with things that your current self has no idea how you would ever get through. When I first heard of hyperacusis during my internet research trying to figure out what was wrong with my ears, I read a story online of a man that had it and how debilitated he was. I thought "How awful, I could never live through that, what a miserable existence." Lo and behold, here I am 6 months later at the same level of debilitation and, miraculously, living through it. We adapt, we grow stronger, we become better as a person. You'd be amazed at just how strong you really are and can become.

I know that religion isn't for everyone, but even before this tragedy of health hit me like a truck I was a strong believer that trials are the effect of living in a mortal world and are absolutely necessary for us to learn to become more like God. I've become closer to him as I pray more, pray for strength to get through. I've had times where I told God that I couldn't do it anymore and He was going to have to take the load that day. And He did. I wasn't magically better, the pain wasn't taken away, and I wasn't suddenly happy; but I could finally get out of bed for the first time in days, the pit of depression that weighed so heavy in my stomach I felt it was going to pull me down through the ground was lightened, and the pain wasn't so terribly excruciating that I could get through my day without any breakdowns. It was as if someone was bearing the load with me, making it just light enough that I could handle it again. I believe what I'm going through is God's way of teaching me to rely on Him, His atonement, and His healing power. I don't expect a miracle, I have far to much to learn before this is taken from me. After all, in my religion we believe we all chose to come here, chose to go through what we do, that our spirits knew what we would have to bear so we could learn to be more like our Heavenly Father. If religion isn't your thing though, I understand, I just know I would not be surviving without it.

Get on the forum and reach out to us. @aot has gotten me through quite a few of those times I was so miserable I couldn't breath, and for that I owe him a world of thanks. Seriously, I'm not spewing crap when I say you can message me any time and I'm sure there are plenty more of us on here who would say the exact same. We're all on here to support each other. Never be embarrassed to break down or freak out, we've all been there and no one is judging.

Thank you for reaching out to me, I've never dealt with anything chronic before so this has been really hard, especially since it's been affecting me negatively.

I'm extremely depressed, I feel like this has taken over my life. I don't know why it's happening. Years of loud noise exposure? I don't know. The sound sensitivity is really affecting me too. Everything seemed "loud" when I was in a small room with friends. Another time at dinner my aunts voices caused me physical pain. I was with some friends over the weekend and had to wear ear plugs.

I don't understand why this is happening. I am not myself at all. Why does this happen to anyone? I'm so devastated by it and I'm terrified it'll never go away and I will never get my life back. I love traveling, going out. Why did this happen.

My family and friends are what keep me going during this. I try to look to the future, months from now. Maybe it will be gone and I'll have my life back. I don't know. I'm never taking anything for granted again. I have not had the best outlook on this but I'm only 4 months in and it's been super hard. I just can't deal a bunch of my girlfriends are going to Rhode Island next month and I can't go like this. I can't even be in a room with their voices. What fun would it be?

I really hate this.

 

[Tavia R]

Thank you for reaching out to me, I've never dealt with anything chronic before so this has been really hard, especially since it's been affecting me negatively.

I'm extremely depressed, I feel like this has taken over my life. I don't know why it's happening. Years of loud noise exposure? I don't know. The sound sensitivity is really affecting me too. Everything seemed "loud" when I was in a small room with friends. Another time at dinner my aunts voices caused me physical pain. I was with some friends over the weekend and had to wear ear plugs.

I don't understand why this is happening. I am not myself at all. Why does this happen to anyone? I'm so devastated by it and I'm terrified it'll never go away and I will never get my life back. I love traveling, going out. Why did this happen.

My family and friends are what keep me going during this. I try to look to the future, months from now. Maybe it will be gone and I'll have my life back. I don't know. I'm never taking anything for granted again. I have not had the best outlook on this but I'm only 4 months in and it's been super hard. I just can't deal a bunch of my girlfriends are going to Rhode Island next month and I can't go like this. I can't even be in a room with their voices. What fun would it be?

I really hate this.

Tara I know how you're feeling right now. I wish saying that could make it feel better, take some of the hurt away.

I really think, if you are not already seeing one, that a therapist would do you a world of good. I seriously don't know how I'd be getting by without mine. A therapist isn't going to cure you physically, but will teach you the coping mechanisms that you need to get through your burdens and help you to avoid developing disorders of the mind. You just simply can't do this on your own, you'll need support from other people. I'm so glad you have the support of your family and friends. At the end of the day though, they can't be there for you or support you in the same way a therapist can, or give you the tools you need to handle your emotional situation.
Sometimes you just need someone that you can dump every single one of your problems onto and not have to feel the guilt of burdening them. My therapist is so great to just sit there and let me absolutely lose it to her because honestly that's just what I need a lot of the time, someone to show how deeply I'm actually struggling, for someone to know and validate how hard I'm trying to survive and tell me it's going to be okay because I can make it. Then, when the dumping is done you are given sound advice you know you can trust, tools to help repairing the emotional state you're in. If there's anything about seeing a therapist that concerns you you could ask me questions about it.

I really think it's something that could help you, it's helped me immensely.

 

[xyz]

I have tested this now also today with foam earplugs. In sum I would say the ears are exposed to less noise which is better and I will probably continue doing this. Yes, probably the only thing one has to take care of is when spraying the head. There the occlusion effect seems to kick in.

 

[weab00]

This thread has been derailed but I want to get back to the original topic. Should people with pain hyperacusis use earplugs in the shower? On the one hand, there's the occlusion effect which makes it 10-20 dB louder supposedly, but on the other hand, I've talked to people who insist on using plugs to combat the shower's loudness and say it takes the edge off. The screech the shower makes when the water is hot is also quite unbearable.

I'm torn in general on over vs under protecting because one makes you more sensitive and the other causes physical agony. What say you?

 

[Tara Lyons]

Taking a shower without earplugs masks the tinnitus but soon it roars afterwards. When wearing earplugs in the shower it generally remains the same level with no spike, so in go earplugs for me.

I've noticed this. I stopped doing earplugs but now I'm doing it again because it's just not worth a spike. Ears go nuts after a shower. Why is this?

 

[Michael Leigh]

I've noticed this. I stopped doing earplugs but now I'm doing it again because it's just not worth a spike. Ears go nuts after a shower. Why is this?

HI @Tara Lyons

The shower is causing a spike because of your oversensitivity to sound. Carry on using sound enrichment whenever possible and try to go out each day to allow your auditory system to get used everyday environmental sounds. I know this can get tiring and monotonous but it's a good way to help desensitise your auditory system.

Michael

 

[GregCA]

On the one hand, there's the occlusion effect which makes it 10-20 dB louder supposedly, but on the other hand, I've talked to people who insist on using plugs to combat the shower's loudness and say it takes the edge off.

The occlusion effect does not come into play unless you talk/sing while in the shower. If you can refrain from doing that, you are unlikely to be affected by it.