- Nov 20, 2019
- 23
- Tinnitus Since
- 06/2019
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Unknown--depression? Hyperacusis and tinnitus
I'm lonely and scared.... I wish my introduction was different.
Hyperacusis or "Decreased sound tolerance" for me.
Dishes and silverware clanking, the tools in my took boxes, plastic wrappers, dog food bag crumpling, paper crumpling, keys jingling, voices of people who talk loud especially some female voices and laughs, the air pressure release on buses and trucks, water coming out of faucet, shower, cars driving over cinders in the road while I am walking in the neighborhood, walking on crunchy ice, microwave, refrigerator, a hair dryer, typing on a keyboard, rain on the roof. A book dropped on a table is not much of a problem. Sounds with a high frequency component are the biggest problem.
My ears feel full a lot, like going up or down in elevation and I have to equalize the pressure by holding my nose closed and trying to blow out my nose (valsava maneuver).
I get tingling sensations in my ear canal. Sometimes sounds I hear and the sound of my voice is mildly distorted until I do the Valsalva maneuver.
Sometimes all or most all of the sounds go away and I get a headache and a neck ache.
Sometimes all or most all of the sounds stop and the my sound sensitivity gets worse.
Most days by the end of the day I am jumpy and on edge because the sensitivity gets worse as the day wears on.
My tinnitus mostly starts when I hear sounds, especially fans, motors, microwave, refrigerator, furnace, car noise, computer fan, clothes dryer, the HVAC compressors on buildings, rain hitting the roof of my house or car, driving on rain soaked roads, driving on highway, copier in the room next to my office. The tinnitus than comes on in response to sounds is a psssss, pssss, or sssss, sssss, ssss. Other times it can be a bunch of different sounds, sometimes one at a time, quite often more than one sound at a time and sometimes a different sound in each ear, maybe two sounds in one ear. Examples: Constant ssssssss, or sssss sssss sssss (most common), or hummm, hummmm, hummmmm, zzzz, zzzz, zzzz or a fast tick-tick-tick-tick-tick or some fucked up sound I cannot even describe and crickets. All of the above usually do not get real loud, thankfully, but my anxiety goes through the roof. I have thought about suicide.
My right ear sometimes gets a seashell sound, this one can turn loud and sends me to bed. I occasionally hear a high pitch sound that starts up gets a little louder then fades away (I have heard this one all my life off and on) thankful, so far, it goes away.
Most nights all or most of the sounds go away. Then when I am exposed to sounds the next day they start coming back.
Somatic tinnitus. Sometimes when I move my neck certain ways or rub it I hear sounds. Sometimes opening and closing my eyes makes the hummm, hummmm, hummm sound change. Sometimes eating makes tinnitus come on or changes the sounds I already have going.
Literally sound torture. Rarely are two days in a row the same or the same the whole day.
Most days, nearly every place there is noise is uncomfortable and I just want to go home or go to the forest. I rarely watch tv and am not able to listen to music as much as I would like.
My anxiety makes all of these feel worse. My anxiety may also keep me stuck in a loop.
History of me: I'm 58. I have suffered from anxiety and depression for at least 48 years. I hate the sound of dogs barking, road noise, bass booming from people's cars, houses etc., people coughing incessantly, loud restaurants. Hard to believe I went to rock concerts and shot guns in my late teens and 20s.
I USED TO LOVE DEAD QUIET and still do if the tinnitus is not making a racket.
How this all started:
My ex wife and I divorced after 22 years in 2018. I changed positions at the University in 2019.
The end of the marriage has been the most traumatic event of my life, that is before hyperacusis and tinnitus.
Late spring early summer 2019 I noticed a faint hissing in my right ear. Also had ear fullness.
6/12/2019 I had a hearing test done. Saw ENT same day. Was told by ENT that the only things that caused tinnitus was Eustachian tube dysfunction or hearing loss (what an idiot -him, but I did not know better at the time).
Tried hearing aid for 30 days. Hearing aids made sounds in right ear worse. Had to have amplification turned down on right ear two times during trial because the sound of wrappers or dishes sounded LOUD in right ear only. Turned in after 30 day trial.
Late August 2019 I was exposed to the sound of a piece of aluminum gutter being cut with a miter saw from about 6' away. (maybe this moved hyeracusis along)
By October the pressure in my ears is getting worse and worse. ENT suggests tubes in my ear drums. October I had them put in. Helped some, but I was still doing the Valsalva maneuver to equalize the pressure quite a bit.
I told the ENT about continued problem with ear pressure and he says that because the eustachian tubes are so blocked even the tube cannot equalize the pressure. Looking back I now realize he has no idea what is going on (hyperacusis in my opinion).
Tinnitus is now in left ear. Sounds are getting stranger, worse.
My anxiety is nearly out of control.
ENT suggests balloon dilation of Eustachian tube to hopefully fix Eustachian tubes, relieve pressure and maybe tinnitus. To get to left eustachian tube he must do septoplasty and turbinate reduction. November 22, 2019 out of desperation I opt for surgery to dilate eustachian tube. This was not too bad of a surgery, but because of my anxiety it was a SEVERE TRAUMATIC event for me.
After surgery my hyperacusis is worse.
During this time I am wearing hearing protection more and more to stop the tinnitus from starting, not to avoid loud sounds.
By now I am starting to have more trouble with tinnitus and hyperacuis that I describe above in Hyperacusis or "Decreased sound tolerance".
In January 2020 I contact the audiology clinic at the university where I work and request to get set up with hearing aids to do sound therapy to treat hyperacusis (amplification turned off).
February 11, 2020 I have hearing tests done at university. They include Loudness Discomfort Levels. After right ear I stop and tell them I cannot/will not have the left ear tested for LDLs. I understand that in "theory" the sounds they are using "should not" hurt my hearing. My tinnitus reacts so much to sound I cannot have more reacting going on.
On February 28th I meet with university audiologist to go over my results and discuss sound generators.
What I am doing to cope:
-I support myself emotionally more than I EVER have in my life.
-I strive to be thankful for what works in my body.
-I strive to be thankful for the people in my life who love, like and care for me
-Sit and watch the sun set more and more frequently
-Drink herbal tea a lot.
-I go to work no matter how depressed I am or what sounds are going on.
-I see a therapist once a week. Working on mindfulness. Trying to keep a positive attitude, or at least keep the negative thinking out.
-I do deep breathing exercises. My blood pressure use to be about 135/85. Now it is around 110/70!! Amazing that this has happen.
-I do guided relaxation exercises.
-I read more than I have in years.
-I try to ignore all this shit going on in my head. It is difficult.
-I am thankful for good or days that are not as bad.
Hyperacusis or "Decreased sound tolerance" for me.
Dishes and silverware clanking, the tools in my took boxes, plastic wrappers, dog food bag crumpling, paper crumpling, keys jingling, voices of people who talk loud especially some female voices and laughs, the air pressure release on buses and trucks, water coming out of faucet, shower, cars driving over cinders in the road while I am walking in the neighborhood, walking on crunchy ice, microwave, refrigerator, a hair dryer, typing on a keyboard, rain on the roof. A book dropped on a table is not much of a problem. Sounds with a high frequency component are the biggest problem.
My ears feel full a lot, like going up or down in elevation and I have to equalize the pressure by holding my nose closed and trying to blow out my nose (valsava maneuver).
I get tingling sensations in my ear canal. Sometimes sounds I hear and the sound of my voice is mildly distorted until I do the Valsalva maneuver.
Sometimes all or most all of the sounds go away and I get a headache and a neck ache.
Sometimes all or most all of the sounds stop and the my sound sensitivity gets worse.
Most days by the end of the day I am jumpy and on edge because the sensitivity gets worse as the day wears on.
My tinnitus mostly starts when I hear sounds, especially fans, motors, microwave, refrigerator, furnace, car noise, computer fan, clothes dryer, the HVAC compressors on buildings, rain hitting the roof of my house or car, driving on rain soaked roads, driving on highway, copier in the room next to my office. The tinnitus than comes on in response to sounds is a psssss, pssss, or sssss, sssss, ssss. Other times it can be a bunch of different sounds, sometimes one at a time, quite often more than one sound at a time and sometimes a different sound in each ear, maybe two sounds in one ear. Examples: Constant ssssssss, or sssss sssss sssss (most common), or hummm, hummmm, hummmmm, zzzz, zzzz, zzzz or a fast tick-tick-tick-tick-tick or some fucked up sound I cannot even describe and crickets. All of the above usually do not get real loud, thankfully, but my anxiety goes through the roof. I have thought about suicide.
My right ear sometimes gets a seashell sound, this one can turn loud and sends me to bed. I occasionally hear a high pitch sound that starts up gets a little louder then fades away (I have heard this one all my life off and on) thankful, so far, it goes away.
Most nights all or most of the sounds go away. Then when I am exposed to sounds the next day they start coming back.
Somatic tinnitus. Sometimes when I move my neck certain ways or rub it I hear sounds. Sometimes opening and closing my eyes makes the hummm, hummmm, hummm sound change. Sometimes eating makes tinnitus come on or changes the sounds I already have going.
Literally sound torture. Rarely are two days in a row the same or the same the whole day.
Most days, nearly every place there is noise is uncomfortable and I just want to go home or go to the forest. I rarely watch tv and am not able to listen to music as much as I would like.
My anxiety makes all of these feel worse. My anxiety may also keep me stuck in a loop.
History of me: I'm 58. I have suffered from anxiety and depression for at least 48 years. I hate the sound of dogs barking, road noise, bass booming from people's cars, houses etc., people coughing incessantly, loud restaurants. Hard to believe I went to rock concerts and shot guns in my late teens and 20s.
I USED TO LOVE DEAD QUIET and still do if the tinnitus is not making a racket.
How this all started:
My ex wife and I divorced after 22 years in 2018. I changed positions at the University in 2019.
The end of the marriage has been the most traumatic event of my life, that is before hyperacusis and tinnitus.
Late spring early summer 2019 I noticed a faint hissing in my right ear. Also had ear fullness.
6/12/2019 I had a hearing test done. Saw ENT same day. Was told by ENT that the only things that caused tinnitus was Eustachian tube dysfunction or hearing loss (what an idiot -him, but I did not know better at the time).
Tried hearing aid for 30 days. Hearing aids made sounds in right ear worse. Had to have amplification turned down on right ear two times during trial because the sound of wrappers or dishes sounded LOUD in right ear only. Turned in after 30 day trial.
Late August 2019 I was exposed to the sound of a piece of aluminum gutter being cut with a miter saw from about 6' away. (maybe this moved hyeracusis along)
By October the pressure in my ears is getting worse and worse. ENT suggests tubes in my ear drums. October I had them put in. Helped some, but I was still doing the Valsalva maneuver to equalize the pressure quite a bit.
I told the ENT about continued problem with ear pressure and he says that because the eustachian tubes are so blocked even the tube cannot equalize the pressure. Looking back I now realize he has no idea what is going on (hyperacusis in my opinion).
Tinnitus is now in left ear. Sounds are getting stranger, worse.
My anxiety is nearly out of control.
ENT suggests balloon dilation of Eustachian tube to hopefully fix Eustachian tubes, relieve pressure and maybe tinnitus. To get to left eustachian tube he must do septoplasty and turbinate reduction. November 22, 2019 out of desperation I opt for surgery to dilate eustachian tube. This was not too bad of a surgery, but because of my anxiety it was a SEVERE TRAUMATIC event for me.
After surgery my hyperacusis is worse.
During this time I am wearing hearing protection more and more to stop the tinnitus from starting, not to avoid loud sounds.
By now I am starting to have more trouble with tinnitus and hyperacuis that I describe above in Hyperacusis or "Decreased sound tolerance".
In January 2020 I contact the audiology clinic at the university where I work and request to get set up with hearing aids to do sound therapy to treat hyperacusis (amplification turned off).
February 11, 2020 I have hearing tests done at university. They include Loudness Discomfort Levels. After right ear I stop and tell them I cannot/will not have the left ear tested for LDLs. I understand that in "theory" the sounds they are using "should not" hurt my hearing. My tinnitus reacts so much to sound I cannot have more reacting going on.
On February 28th I meet with university audiologist to go over my results and discuss sound generators.
What I am doing to cope:
-I support myself emotionally more than I EVER have in my life.
-I strive to be thankful for what works in my body.
-I strive to be thankful for the people in my life who love, like and care for me
-Sit and watch the sun set more and more frequently
-Drink herbal tea a lot.
-I go to work no matter how depressed I am or what sounds are going on.
-I see a therapist once a week. Working on mindfulness. Trying to keep a positive attitude, or at least keep the negative thinking out.
-I do deep breathing exercises. My blood pressure use to be about 135/85. Now it is around 110/70!! Amazing that this has happen.
-I do guided relaxation exercises.
-I read more than I have in years.
-I try to ignore all this shit going on in my head. It is difficult.
-I am thankful for good or days that are not as bad.
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