Giving Up — I Just Can't Live Like This Anymore

[jadebug]

There is truth in their thinking although they may not understand the true mechanism how this can affect the mental processes in the brain when it comes to processing the tinnitus ringing stimulus. Too much anxiety can trigger the limbic nervous system which is in control right now causing us to be very scared and anxious of T.

Being so scared or anxious of T initially is a very normal reaction of the body trying to protect us from harm and danger. We are often very scared when T is new because T is both an alien sensation and a new ailment to your body. Our brain doesn't understand T and doesn't know what to expect. Failing to shake T, the brain just reactions in trauma and shock. Your limbic nervous system kicks in overriding the normal parasympathetic nervous system and you function in fight or flight mode, the defensive mechanism for a human in face of a danger. The fight or flight center, the Amygdala, in our central nervous system is in control now making every sensation quite acute and intense and you easily succumb to fear and worry as that is how the body tries to protect you. It tends to tell you to be aware of the threatening object which in this case is the new T or new level of T. That is why we tend to monitor T non-stop initially and can't seem to help it.

Try remaining calm and positive as humanly possible as you can. By being calm and positive, and be more accepting of the new normal, by educating ourselves more about T (like what you are learning by joining this forum), and by doing some relaxing or interesting activities or by going back to living life again, our brain will have a better chance to restore the normal parasympathetic nervous system, and the pre-frontal cortex will take over processing the T ringing stimulus from the scare-crow center, the Amygdala. One of the functions of pre-frontal cortex is to suppress the fear reaction. It will also let you handle other negative reactions/emotions more normally.

This process is similar to a child being afraid of the dark because of not understanding what it is all about. Fear sets in and stress builds up and the child cries to get help and to relieve the stress. Later on and growing up the child learns more about the dark and the fear fades and no stress/fear will be forth coming to trigger the limbic system. Likewise with our tinnitus experience, our brain needs to take time to understand T more and be more hardened to it so the fear reaction will subside. This process takes time and may take learning some good strategies. People tend to get better in 6 months to 2 years. So it is worthwhile to wait it out while maintaining calm and positive plus using some other helpful strategies such as CBT, TRT, Mindfulness etc., etc.

So could anxiety actually be making the T louder? Or is the anxiety making me react so terribly which makes it all seem worse? Because if I can count on the volume decreasing a bit I'll be even more hopeful. Right now it feels like the T is vibrating my head and almost feels painful. I can't imagine habituating to this! Another thing is it's sort of reactive to sounds like when I try and mask it becomes so much louder and tries to compete with sounds. For example the shower masks it wonderfully but when I get out it's roaring loud. Is this a kind of hyperacusis? Sometimes peoples voices bother me if they talk too loud or are too close especially if I'm having a bad loudness day. Does reactivity ever go away? I'm not sure what masking I should be using as my pitch is very high. Thank you so much for your post it really really means a lot to me! I can't thank you enough! You all have really saved me!

 

[jadebug]

I feel for you very much. I hope things get better asap. Since you are in such a dark place right now I'm going to share a study with you but I kind of feel somewhat uncomfortable about it. It is a case study where a man supposedly got tinnitus from generic Zoloft (an SSRI in the same class as Lexapro). He ended up taking generic Remeron (an antidepressant) and it went away. I have no idea if that drug would help you or even if it is a good idea. It's something you would have to weigh the risks with the doctor on. Also, Remeron can increase a lot of people's appetites as a "side effect". With my tinnitus I had to take Xanax or klonopin and was able to get my T to calm down but I probably shouldn't have used it every day. Huge mistake on my part. Is should have used it as needed. Anyway, the article is here:

https://www.hindawi.com/journals/crips/2016/1790692/

I am showing this to you because you are in such a dark place but I usually I try to avoid anti-depressants if possible.

Wow thank you for sharing this with me. It's nice just to see that there's hope with potential AD-induced tinnitus because when I first started taking the lexapro and looked up tinnitus and lexapro I saw horror stories of people getting awful tinnitus that is permanent and ruined their lives. It made me so upset.

I actually went to see another psychiatrist because the one who prescribed me lexapro wasn't a good fit and seemed to brush off my T and said I'd get over it. The new one was much more understanding and even went through lists of ADs with me and asked what I thought/heard about them in relation with T. We couldn't come to a decision at my appointment so she said she'd do more research about my particular problem but she said I really need to be on a medication or I will let my depression spiral out of control and I agree although I wish I could do this myself without the help of meds. She gave me .25mg of xanax to take no more than three times a day for a month but I find it really doesn't calm me much at all. I don't want to walk down that road with benzos but I'm in such an awful place I had to try something and thought that a month would be okay. I'll look more into remeron and discuss it with my doctor. Thank you for the reply and advice.

 

[jadebug]

Youre not alone. Weve all been where you are now. Ive uttered the very same phrase many a time ( I cant live like this). Just when I thought my life was over, here I am today about to tell you that I have habituated to the point that t doesnt have a grip on the way I live my life anymore.

I am sorry your t is awful today. It is really hard to not focus on something that is bugging you so much.

Your life is not over. There is hope.

You will manage your studies and clinical placements one day at a time. You can do this. I returned to work 2 weeks into my t onset (I am a midwife). I didnt think I could concentrate, but I managed. It was actually good to get back to some semblance of a routine, and to socialise again with my colleagues; and of course, the mums and their babes.

Your potential and your future has not vanished. You are going through a hard time right now, but you will learn with time and support here, to move forward.

I know t changes people. I am one of them, but I dont think it changes the core of who we are.

You dont need to beat it. Yout just need to go easy on yourself, and deal with this one day at a time. Some times, it will be moment by moment. That is ok and normal. Eventually, moments will stretch out into days into weeks and so forth......Next thing, you will have your life back.

We all understand here. So, hanging out here is a good place to start. Ive not necessarily found others with t to be all that sympathetic either; depending on their own journey with t.

I presume youre no longer taking the lexapro? What are you doing to help boost your serotonin? I bet you havent sleep well with all of this going on. Can you work on improving your sleep?

Problem with t is the more we listen for it, the more conscious of it we become (that is my experience of t largely anyway) Maybe see if you can find some distractions to give your brain a rest from listening to the noise?

FYI, my t is very intrusive, and like you, can be heard over the shower. I think this is related to its frequency, rather than just the volume. Could it be possible that your t frequency has changed and that is what you are perceiving as a spike?

Do you have anyone to talk to ? A friend, teacher, family member?

You are so sweet thank you! It's helpful to hear that you went back to work so soon after getting intrusive T. I've been working 3 days a week in a office setting as my summer job doing filing and other clerical work and have been able to keep doing that. It gives me something to do but I still find myself always thinking about T. For about two weeks I was doing yoga daily for a half an hour but then hit a rough patch because I just couldn't focus on doing the movements and relaxing. I would actually start crying and think to myself wow yoga would be so amazing if I didn't have T. That's the cycle of thoughts I have been getting into. If I go out to a restaurant I'll think "wow last time I came here I didn't have T" etc. Its really awful and I can't seem to get out of that.

Anything I try and do nowadays seems just tainted by T like I can't focus on anything.
The one thing that helps though is taking daily walks around my neighborhood with my mom. I can't hear my T as much in the outdoors and I get to see nature and talk with my mom. I noticed I feel my best when I'm moving and doing something. Relaxing isn't an option right now it seems.

Everyone in my life seems to be tired of hearing me talk about T but my mom and boyfriend are probably the most supportive. My boyfriend has even been doing research on T and assures me a year from now I'll be okay. It helps although sometimes think he knows nothing about this condition. When I first told him my ears started ringing he told me to go to the doctor and they'll prescribe something for it. He was astounded that there's nothing to be done for T.

Since you said your T is intrusive does that mean you always hear it and don't care or it's something that doesn't even register anymore and you only hear it when you want? I want to get to a place where I can't hear it unless I think about it but I'm worried that can't be achieved with severe T. Oh how I wish I could get the mild T I had back where I only could hear it in the quiet. Thanks again for the uplifting post!

 

[jadebug]

I'm so sorry about your T
All of us here know your pain,. 10 months ago the T in my right ear had such a loud pierce in it I would swear it would never get better. But it did, and still improving. My T was caused by noise from a concert and people screaming near me.
My T has improved about 80% now. T can be caused by many reasons, and it looks like you think medication may have caused yours.
I have seen information about Wellbutrin antidepressant causing T, and in some cases it can take months for it so fade even after taking the drug for a short time.
My point is, your are putting too much pressure on yourself about your college. I know when I got my T, I could not think of anything else. For what its worth, I think you should just take care of yourself right now, postpone college, lay low and ride this spike out for a few months. IMO your T will be significantly better in 3-6 months. Just lay low for a while and please give it a chance to resolve itself.

Thanks for the support! Did your T reduce gradually downward or did you have ups and downs and months where you had no progress at all? My first month the T seemed to go down drastically and then it hit a standstill and then went down a bit and now it seems like it's up and down and just gets worse and then gets better and is reactive and isn't and sometimes it's bad in one ear and then quiets down and goes to the other ear. It's very weird and scary and hard to tell if it's improving.

 

[Starthrower]

I was going to college to become a nurse, but now I don't know how I'll be able to handle all of the work and studying. I had a 4.0 GPA and such potential. I wanted to marry my amazing boyfriend in a few years and eventually have children. But this has all been ruined. I'm a ghost of my former self.

Jadebug,

I haven't read any replies here. But please know...it is going to be just fine for you. I felt the same way many years ago dropping out of law school because of the exact same reasoning you are experiencing. Fast forward over a decade later...I am a better me. Even though I had it tough the first year I kept fighting to find what worked best for me.

Now...life is good.

And I felt the same exact way you do now. You will marry and have your children and everything else that right at this moment seem impossible.

Anxiety can be treated. That was my first step.

 

[jadebug]

Jadebug,

I haven't read any replies here. But please know...it is going to be just fine for you. I felt the same way many years ago dropping out of law school because of the exact same reasoning you are experiencing. Fast forward over a decade later...I am a better me. Even though I had it tough the first year I kept fighting to find what worked best for me.

Now...life is good.

And I felt the same exact way you do now. You will marry and have your children and everything else that right at this moment seem impossible.

Anxiety can be treated. That was my first step.

Thank you so much! It feels so good to know you have been where I am and it got better for you! Did you ever go back to law school? Was/is your T still intrusive? I really want to give nursing school a try now and I know if I don't my parents will be so disappointed in me so I have to try! Any tips for studying with T and helping with concentration?

 

[Kolisar]

Hi @jadebug . I am so sorry to learn of your suffering. You have received so many responses so far (and I tend to write long ones myself) so I will try to be brief.

I just can't live like this anymore. My tinnitus is awful today, my head is buzzing, my ear is vibrating. This is torture I can't get used to this.

You will be able to live with it. We all felt like that. It is bizarre to hear something that no one else can hear. It can make you think you are insane. And, many people learn to habituate, which is basically getting used to it and learning to tune it out.

I had so much planned for my life but tinnitus stole it all away. I was going to college to become a nurse, but now I don't know how I'll be able to handle all of the work and studying. I had a 4.0 GPA and such potential. I wanted to marry my amazing boyfriend in a few years and eventually have children. But this has all been ruined. I'm a ghost of my former self.

You can get yourself back. You do not have to let this ruin your life. Many of use have been living with this for years (decades even). I know that is not what you wanted to hear, but you can make it through this. You have a loving boyfriend and family. They will help you get through this.

I wanted to be strong and beat this but I just can't anymore. No one understands.

They have no frame of reference. I have said this in a few replies before, but it is like when people find out that I am an identical twin and they ask me "What is is like to be an identical twin?". I cannot answer that question, I have never not been an identical twin so I have no frame of reference from which to respond. The same is true for tinnitus. People who have no experienced it have no frame of reference, and therefor usually cannot understand what you are going through.

I found a couple websites when a dear friend of mine tried to understand what I was experiencing.

https://www.soundrelief.com/tinnitus/sounds-tinnitus/
http://www.szynalski.com/tone-generator/

Between these two sites I was able to put together a reasonable facsimile of what I hear relentlessly 24/7 (even in my dreams). Perhaps sites like these or similar ones can help those who you need to understand gain a glimpse into what you are experiencing.

I know it is difficult. I know it is frightening, but you will get through this. hang in there and remember, you don't have to go through this alone. You have your boyfriend and your family, but you also have us; a forum literally filled with fellow tinnitus sufferers who do understand what you are going through.

 

[Bill Bauer]

Another thing is it's sort of reactive to sounds like when I try and mask it becomes so much louder and tries to compete with sounds. For example the shower masks it wonderfully but when I get out it's roaring loud.

I had that too. I believe this is H. I think it is a good idea to listen to your body. I stopped taking showers and just take baths. My H is gone, but I am trying to do all I can to protect my ears.

My first month the T seemed to go down drastically and then it hit a standstill and then went down a bit and now it seems like it's up and down and just gets worse and then gets better and is reactive and isn't and sometimes it's bad in one ear and then quiets down and goes to the other ear. It's very weird and scary and hard to tell if it's improving.

Could it be that you have not been protecting your ears from mild noises, and this had slowed down your progress?

 

[Bill Bauer]

People who have no experienced it have no frame of reference, and therefor usually cannot understand what you are going through.

Back when I first read about tinnitus (several years before I got tinnitus), I knew immediately how it would feel, and this is exactly how it ended up feeling. It is still a mystery to me why anyone would not take this condition seriously.

 

[Kolisar]

Back when I first read about tinnitus (several years before I got tinnitus), I knew immediately how it would feel, and this is exactly how it ended up feeling. It is still a mystery to me why anyone would not take this condition seriously.

I stand corrected. You are the first I have encountered who understood prior to being afflicted, and you're quote of my post demonstrates how poor a typist I am. You showed me to be wrong two different ways in one post .

 

[Bill Bauer]

I stand corrected. You are the first I have encountered who understood prior to being afflicted, and you're quote of my post demonstrates how poor a typist I am. You showed me to be wrong two different ways in one post .

When I was responding to your post, I didn't notice that typo there.

I found out about T when I read
https://www.samharris.org/blog/item/adventures-in-the-land-of-illness
The thing is that I was absolutely Horrified that something like that could happen to a person. Too bad his T was not noise induced. I might have taken more care to protect my ears, because I know that that post made a huge impression on me.

 

[Kolisar]

When I was responding to your post, I didn't notice that typo there.

I didn't think you necessarily did. It just stood out to me in the quote. And I know you certainly were not calling it out.

 

[jadebug]

Hi @jadebug . I am so sorry to learn of your suffering. You have received so many responses so far (and I tend to write long ones myself) so I will try to be brief.



You will be able to live with it. We all felt like that. It is bizarre to hear something that no one else can hear. It can make you think you are insane. And, many people learn to habituate, which is basically getting used to it and learning to tune it out.



You can get yourself back. You do not have to let this ruin your life. Many of use have been living with this for years (decades even). I know that is not what you wanted to hear, but you can make it through this. You have a loving boyfriend and family. They will help you get through this.



They have no frame of reference. I have said this in a few replies before, but it is like when people find out that I am an identical twin and they ask me "What is is like to be an identical twin?". I cannot answer that question, I have never not been an identical twin so I have no frame of reference from which to respond. The same is true for tinnitus. People who have no experienced it have no frame of reference, and therefor usually cannot understand what you are going through.

I found a couple websites when a dear friend of mine tried to understand what I was experiencing.

https://www.soundrelief.com/tinnitus/sounds-tinnitus/
http://www.szynalski.com/tone-generator/

Between these two sites I was able to put together a reasonable facsimile of what I hear relentlessly 24/7 (even in my dreams). Perhaps sites like these or similar ones can help those who you need to understand gain a glimpse into what you are experiencing.

I know it is difficult. I know it is frightening, but you will get through this. hang in there and remember, you don't have to go through this alone. You have your boyfriend and your family, but you also have us; a forum literally filled with fellow tinnitus sufferers who do understand what you are going through.

Thank you for the reply! The amount of responses I've gotten truly warms my heart! I'm just scared of being plagued by tinnitus and thoughts of it forever! How much do you notice your T during the day? It's not constant right? I had habituated to mild T 6 years ago and could go months without thinking of it and heard it only in a quiet room although it could be quite noticeable I didn't care. I want this again but am unsure if it's achievable with intrusive reactive T.

I just played the sound I hear based on the links you supplied for my dad and he told me he has a mix of crickets and ocean roaring and sometimes a heart beat sound. I told him I hate how I get multiple sounds like static and a tonal frequency and hate how much it changes day to day. Then my dad goes oh I like that it changes who wants to hear the same thing every day? It's nice to mix it up. Lol as if he's talking about what genre of music he listens to. I wish I could have this reaction. Maybe with time. Thanks again!

 

[jadebug]

I had that too. I believe this is H. I think it is a good idea to listen to your body. I stopped taking showers and just take baths. My H is gone, but I am trying to do all I can to protect my ears.

Could it be that you have not been protecting your ears from mild noises, and this had slowed down your progress?

I'm not sure I don't think I've done anything different I certainly haven't been listening to headphones or do anything too noisy. I don't want to overprotect either and I do think my T could be noise induced.

 

[jadebug]

When I was responding to your post, I didn't notice that typo there.

I found out about T when I read
https://www.samharris.org/blog/item/adventures-in-the-land-of-illness
The thing is that I was absolutely Horrified that something like that could happen to a person. Too bad his T was not noise induced. I might have taken more care to protect my ears, because I know that that post made a huge impression on me.

I actually remember being terrified of tinnitus when an audiologist came to visit my school in elementary school. I remember my mom reassuring me I would be fine and not to listen to loud things. And before this as I child I was terrified of loud stuff and I still got T. This makes me really sad. I did everything I could to prevent and still got it...

 

[Kolisar]

Before I answer your question I have to say that everyone experiences tinnitus differently. Many people are "cured' (their symptoms vanish) in months. So, do not be discouraged by the experiences of others.

Now, to answer the question...

How much do you notice your T during the day? It's not constant right?

Unfortunately, for me it is constant, 24/7 (even in my dreams). But, I have had it my entire life, so my case is different to yours and you should not be discouraged as the cause of my tinnitus is probably different to the cause of your tinnitus, so we are comparing the proverbial apples and oranges.

 

[jadebug]

Before I answer your question I have to say that everyone experiences tinnitus differently. Many people are "cured' (their symptoms vanish) in months. So, do not be discouraged by the experiences of others.

Now, to answer the question...



Unfortunately, for me it is constant, 24/7 (even in my dreams). But, I have had it my entire life, so my case is different to yours and you should not be discouraged as the cause of my tinnitus is probably different to the cause of your tinnitus, so we are comparing the proverbial apples and oranges.

But is it on your mind 24/7? That's what I'm most worried about. Like always thinking about it. It's bad enough to hear it constantly but to pay attention and think about it always seems like torture. I know our cases are very different but I've been trying to get a better understanding for habituation in multiple scenarios I guess.

 

[Bill Bauer]

But is it on your mind 24/7?

It used to be on my mind 24/7. As soon as I would forget about it, I would become aware of the noise, and the cycle would keep repeating itself.

This is no longer the case for me now. Many people whose T hasn't faded report being habituated. So chances are this stage will last a month or two for you, and then things will get better.

 

[Kolisar]

But is it on your mind 24/7? That's what I'm most worried about.

It is, but I have always suffered from depression, obsessive behavior, etc.. So, my experience is not a good one to measure your potential experience against. Many people have the ringing constantly and learn to habituate and basically ignore it unless they start thinking about it. I would pay more attention to @Bill Bauer 's response and experience than to mine. His is probably the more common experience.

 

[TheDanishGirl]

It is, but I have always suffered from depression, obsessive behavior, etc.. So, my experience is not a good one to measure your potential experience against. Many people have the ringing constantly and learn to habituate and basically ignore it unless they start thinking about it. I would pay more attention to @Bill Bauer 's response and experience than to mine. His is probably the more common experience.

That sounds awful I have also suffered with depression on/off for many years and I am an obsessive person. Have you tried some TRT or CRT?

Do you think about it even when you are outside and being active? That's where I often forget mine, but if I something inactive I tend to hear it 95-100% of the time.

 

[Kolisar]

That sounds awful I have also suffered with depression on/off for many years and I am an obsessive person. Have you tried some TRT or CRT?

Do you think about it even when you are outside and being active? That's where I often forget mine, but if I something inactive I tend to hear it 95-100% of the time.

Thank you. It is not fun, but I have not been able to do anything about it yet, so I just live with it.

I have tried therapy and medication, a 10 year stint with both in the past (I may be too broken to be fixed ).

There is the occasional bit of time, usually when I am stressing about something else, that it is not on the forefront of my mind, but where I cannot mask the sound at all, it is always there; I always hear it, so it is almost impossible for me to ignore.

That being said, again, everyone experiences tinnitus differently. I hope that my experience does not lead you to believe that yours will be similar. As @Bill Bauer has said in number of his posts, it clears up for most people in a number of months. Those months will be miserable, but you should keep your focus on the light at the end of the tunnel. Statistically (based on what Bill has stated, and I have no reason to doubt his information) you have a very good chance of having this clear up with time.

As always, I wish you the best and please keep us updated on your progress. We will be here to help you when you are struggling, and to celebrate when you get through this.

 

[TheDanishGirl]

Thank you. It is not fun, but I have not been able to do anything about it yet, so I just live with it.

I have tried therapy and medication, a 10 year stint with both in the past (I may be too broken to be fixed ).

There is the occasional bit of time, usually when I am stressing about something else, that it is not on the forefront of my mind, but where I cannot mask the sound at all, it is always there; I always hear it, so it is almost impossible for me to ignore.

That being said, again, everyone experiences tinnitus differently. I hope that my experience does not lead you to believe that yours will be similar. As @Bill Bauer has said in number of his posts, it clears up for most people in a number of months. Those months will be miserable, but you should keep your focus on the light at the end of the tunnel. Statistically (based on what Bill has stated, and I have no reason to doubt his information) you have a very good chance of having this clear up with time.

As always, I wish you the best and please keep us updated on your progress. We will be here to help you when you are struggling, and to celebrate when you get through this.

Thank you for your kind words Im sorry to hear that you feel you may be to broken to be fixed but thumps up for you keep pushing forward, that must take massive strength.....you are a warrior!

 

[Kolisar]

Thank you for your kind words Im sorry to hear that you feel you may be to broken to be fixed but thumps up for you keep pushing forward, that must take massive strength.....you are a warrior!

And I thank you as well.

 

[jjflyman]

Thanks for the support! Did your T reduce gradually downward or did you have ups and downs and months where you had no progress at all? My first month the T seemed to go down drastically and then it hit a standstill and then went down a bit and now it seems like it's up and down and just gets worse and then gets better and is reactive and isn't and sometimes it's bad in one ear and then quiets down and goes to the other ear. It's very weird and scary and hard to tell if it's improving.

I think everyones T is different, and depending on the cause will improve at different rates. Mine was pretty steady improvement, bur it was/is VERY slow, with improvement only measurable in months. No matter what you think right now, I can almost guarantee you will be significantly improved in 12 months. It just takes a long time. A year from now you will be posting in the "success stories"

 

[Paulmanlike]

I think everyones T is different, and depending on the cause will improve at different rates. Mine was pretty steady improvement, bur it was/is VERY slow, with improvement only measurable in months. No matter what you think right now, I can almost guarantee you will be significantly improved in 12 months. It just takes a long time. A year from now you will be posting in the "success stories"

Jj you mentioned that an ENT said to you that a typical improvement rate is from 1-2 years - did he mean volume reduction or habituation?

Also why are so sure about volume reduction happening over several months because it's happened to you? From what I read, it is rare especially from noise induced t to ever resolve, rather we learn to habituate to it in the majority of cases

 

[Bill Bauer]

Also why are so sure about volume reduction happening over several months because it's happened to you? From what I read, it is rare especially from noise induced t to ever resolve, rather we learn to habituate to it in the majority of cases

Over the past 5 months, I watched a number of people join this forum, be active, and then leave as their T had faded. This seems to be true for the majority of the cases. And then there is this -
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/spontaneous-recovery-stats-over-70-recover-3-studies.21441/

 

[Vicki14]

I actually remember being terrified of tinnitus when an audiologist came to visit my school in elementary school. I remember my mom reassuring me I would be fine and not to listen to loud things. And before this as I child I was terrified of loud stuff and I still got T. This makes me really sad. I did everything I could to prevent and still got it...

Hi, you should take much reassurance that you did all you could to prevent this. The guilt associated with having not done this only makes it more difficult to accept xx

 

[billie48]

So could anxiety actually be making the T louder? Or is the anxiety making me react so terribly which makes it all seem worse? Because if I can count on the volume decreasing a bit I'll be even more hopeful. Right now it feels like the T is vibrating my head and almost feels painful. I can't imagine habituating to this! Another thing is it's sort of reactive to sounds like when I try and mask it becomes so much louder and tries to compete with sounds. For example the shower masks it wonderfully but when I get out it's roaring loud. Is this a kind of hyperacusis? Sometimes peoples voices bother me if they talk too loud or are too close especially if I'm having a bad loudness day. Does reactivity ever go away? I'm not sure what masking I should be using as my pitch is very high. Thank you so much for your post it really really means a lot to me! I can't thank you enough! You all have really saved me!

I am no doctor so this is only my personal opinion. Personally, I believe anxiety can actually make T louder, at least perception-wise. I think when we are very anxious, the limbic system is activated as the object of anxiety, tinnitus, is now considered by the limbic system as a potential threat. This will cause the Amygdala to take over in processing the T signal/stimulus and it can surely fire up our emotional response to this threat. Our senses are sharpened and focused on this threat, ready for the fight, or flight. This will make T so much dominant in our senses and that is why it is very hard to not focus on it initially. The brain neurons may be in hyperactive state when the limbic system is dominant and so the pseudo sound it creates, our tinnitus, will appear that much stronger in intensity. So we need to find ways to get out of the control of the limbic nervous system. You can google search this and may find many suggestions. But generally, we need to calm down emotionally, do relaxing or leisurely activities to distract from T, learn how to breathe deeply (abdominal breathing), perhaps going outdoor or engaging in more hobbies etc.

You can also try some natural alternatives to calm the nerves and help you have good sleep, such as Melatonin, Lemon Balm, Valerian, Hops, Catnips, Passion Flower, Chamomile, Lavender, Kava, etc. You can do google search or check Amazon.com for each of them to know how people review these products, and see if you can take them as a supplement. Check out this site on using natural herbs for helping to sleep or to calm the nerves.

http://www.christopherhobbs.com/lib...ealth/herbs-and-natural-remedies-for-insomnia /

If people's voices seem too loud and bothering you, you may have some degree of hyperacusis. H is quite common for those whose T is very high pitched such as mine. H can turn all normal sounds seeming too loud and can be painful or piercingly hurtful. But don't panic nor despair. H tends to fade over time, at least for many people. Mine was gone within the year it started. Many people claim the same. So try to protect from loud places but don't over-protect from normal ambient sounds around you, and then just let time and the miracle of healing happen. Staying calm and positive will help you in the process too. Take good care. God bless your recovery.

 

[jjflyman]

From what I read, it is rare especially from noise induced t to ever resolve, rather we learn to habituate to it in the majority of cases

The VAST majority of noise induced T fades in 6-18 months. I read that from a report from a Tinnitus expert, But I do not have it bookmarked. I'm sorry yours did not fade. Also, Lots of Noise induced T suffers on the website report significant improvement within 1 year (including me twice).
The authors themselves report most T improves significantly over time:
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/panic/
Sorry if you choose not to believe it.

 

[Kolisar]

I believe anxiety can actually make T louder, at least perception-wise.

I agree with @billie48 . It may be perception only, but it will "feel" louder, and that is all it takes. And, if it feels louder you can get into a snowballing situation where it feeling louder causes more anxiety, which makes it seem even louder, etc.. The key take-away is try not to stress out over it.