I have a question regarding habituation: when habituated are there days/times where you actually don't hear it? I know it's always there like the way we filter out the sound of annoying traffic etc, but what I'm asking is, can it actually become completely filtered. In other words a state of mind where you actually don't hear it at all but can selectively find it by listening for it.
The reason for my question is because I feel like I have amnesia about my own tinnitus. Previous to my increase which has now been over 9 weeks, I am seriously struggling to remember exactly what I heard in a silent room. It's been really bugging me to the point that I've got a feeling that my old T at some point may have even gone away completely. All I know is that the first time I got T over 10 years ago, I remember the struggle to accept it and vividly remember the ringing in my ears whilst reading books months/years after onset. I did little research on it at the time because I already knew what it was.
I accepted it and moved on with my life and essentially forgot about it. One day I recall a friend asking me if my ears ever rang at night and immediately knew he must have a tinnitus concern. I remember the conversation we had whereby I told him I had ringing in my ears but didn't pay any attention to it any more and only heard it if I listened for it.
On a day to day basis I had ZERO interest in it and I literally NEVER thought about it. It only crossed my mind fleetingly when I'd see a tinnitus story on the news for example.
Then my increase happened and it totally snapped me out of my trance. I remember doing a T sound check (which id stopped doing years ago) and thinking this is louder than usual. Then the panic set in which totally reminded me of how I felt when I first noticed it all those years ago. The thing is, because I never thought about it or acknowledged it I'm not sure if I was well habituated or if it had gone away completely.
The louder T I have now doesn't affect me sleeping at all, even though it is loud and raging away it has always felt somewhat familiar if that makes sense. I have good and very very bad days which in itself confuses me. I don't ever recall having fluctuations.
So if you have made it all the way to the end of my ramblings my question is simple: Do you think I was habituated or had my T possibly gone away?
That question is kind of rhetorical as it is impossible to answer, but my initial question at the top is the same thing: When habituated are there days/times when you don't hear it?
The reason for my question is because I feel like I have amnesia about my own tinnitus. Previous to my increase which has now been over 9 weeks, I am seriously struggling to remember exactly what I heard in a silent room. It's been really bugging me to the point that I've got a feeling that my old T at some point may have even gone away completely. All I know is that the first time I got T over 10 years ago, I remember the struggle to accept it and vividly remember the ringing in my ears whilst reading books months/years after onset. I did little research on it at the time because I already knew what it was.
I accepted it and moved on with my life and essentially forgot about it. One day I recall a friend asking me if my ears ever rang at night and immediately knew he must have a tinnitus concern. I remember the conversation we had whereby I told him I had ringing in my ears but didn't pay any attention to it any more and only heard it if I listened for it.
On a day to day basis I had ZERO interest in it and I literally NEVER thought about it. It only crossed my mind fleetingly when I'd see a tinnitus story on the news for example.
Then my increase happened and it totally snapped me out of my trance. I remember doing a T sound check (which id stopped doing years ago) and thinking this is louder than usual. Then the panic set in which totally reminded me of how I felt when I first noticed it all those years ago. The thing is, because I never thought about it or acknowledged it I'm not sure if I was well habituated or if it had gone away completely.
The louder T I have now doesn't affect me sleeping at all, even though it is loud and raging away it has always felt somewhat familiar if that makes sense. I have good and very very bad days which in itself confuses me. I don't ever recall having fluctuations.
So if you have made it all the way to the end of my ramblings my question is simple: Do you think I was habituated or had my T possibly gone away?
That question is kind of rhetorical as it is impossible to answer, but my initial question at the top is the same thing: When habituated are there days/times when you don't hear it?