Has Anyone Had to Go to a Convalescent Home Because of Their Tinnitus?

[spinnaker]

The noise in my head is so bad now I am afraid I am going to go insane. I cannot sleep without meds and I can't keep taking Ambien everyday to get to sleep.

My problem is that it is just me here. I have no one to go out and buy food. I can't drive because I can't sleep. I can't live on pizza for the rest of my life. I am worried I am headed for a home at age 60.

Anyone in the same boat as me with no one to care for them? Has anyone had to go to a convalescent home because of their tinnitus?

 

[ajc]

have no one to go out and buy food. I can't drive because I can't sleep. I can't live on pizza for the rest of my life. I am worried I am headed for a home at age 60.

There are services where nurses / home assistants bring you food every day.

Or use a home delivery service like Uber Eats to order more varied food than just pizzas.

Has anyone had to go to a convalescent home because of their tinnitus?

I've never heard of that. I think some people have ended up at a psychiatric unit though.

I think you are in the initial panic stage, it will take a while to get adjusted to tinnitus. Then normal sleep will resume.

 

[slc]

Instead of Ambien, you could try Valerian and Melatonin. Also play ocean or rain sound when you are in bed, or all the time.

You can download these sounds to your phone. I sometimes play music through earbuds to sleep, but at relatively low volume.

Another option is Ayurvedic herbs which may help calm down the fight or flight response. Ed Danaher at the Ayurvedic institute in New Mexico can do a phone consult with you.

I was in a similar place to where you are at when I first developed tinnitus 7 years ago at age 57. I nearly lost my mind with the sound, lack of sleep. I also went from 165 pounds to 135 pounds because I couldn't eat as I lost my appetite due to the tinnitus.

You may also be experiencing hyperacusis which is a nightmare.

I have done a lot more than I just listed to deal with the tinnitus. But I now have really severe days about twice a week where I am just about bedridden. However I have lots of days where the tinnitus is down to about three which is heaven compared to where I was which was near suicidal.

Klonopin 1.5 mg, 300 mg of Gabapentin, and 30 mg of Celexa may also help when taken 2 hours before bed.

Hang in there,
Stephan

 

[MattS]

@spinnaker

You're obviously getting a lot of different kinds of advice, from "order more than pizza" to "300mg of gabapentin".

All of this advice is valid, and worth considering. But obviously comes from opposite ends of the spectrum.

I'd suggest starting with the type of advice @ajc is offering, and see how far that can get you. As they said: you're likely in the panic stage right now - which, while totally understandable, is also almost always temporary. It *will* get more tolerable. You *will* learn to live with it. And I don't mean that from a "you'll find a way to survive" perspective. I literally mean: you will learn to live with it, and you will be okay.

First thing to do, as @slc implied, is to find ways to make the sounds more tolerable now. Ocean sounds, white/pink noise, falling rain sounds, light jazz...whatever works for you: play it at just barely under the tinnitus volume, and learn that you can function that way, that you can get control of this thing. Play it during the day, play it while you fall asleep. It helps; a lot.

You should also find ways to relax. Consider meditation. Practice focusing on other sounds in the environment (not ignoring the tinnitus but steeling your attention on other sounds). Take baths. Put your head underwater, and steel your attention on the low frequency sound waves under there. Learn what takes the edge off the sounds - something always does, you just need to experiment.

Then you have to start picking yourself back up, and making good decisions for yourself. Yes, it sucks that there is no one there to help you...but you can do this on your own. As @ajc said, start eating better. Force yourself to get out of the house. Go for walks (with ocean sounds playing LOW on your headphones). Find your inner strength, and make a decision that tinnitus isn't going to control you.

If you have to see a psychologist, there is no shame in that. CBT can be *very* helpful, for learning to switch attention away from the tinnitus, and also for finding ways to cope better even when you can't.

Then - only then, once you've tried all these things - should you go the psychiatrist/medication route. Though, obviously, if you need to, there's no shame there either. But it's so much better if you can come to terms with it on your own.

And then remember that you're not alone. You have a whole community here who are always happy to lend and ear, offer some advice. Hit us up whenever you need. We all understand (approximately) what you're going through. And we can all tell you that it will get better...

 

[Michael B]

I remember early on when I lacked sleep due to tinnitus. It was really rough. I didn't want to drive. I eventually started using a sound machine and found a masking sound that works for me. Now sleep is more manageable. What helps me during the day is just being outside. It helps get my mind off the tinnitus. Also the sunlight and activity helps me sleep. I don't blame you for not driving under those conditions. Possibly not safe. But walking is and maybe you can walk to the markets? Just a thought.

 

[Greg Sacramento]

@spinnaker So much detail that we don't know about your live, but with what you did say - one though.

If you don't have closeness with anyone, then maybe consider hiring a personnel life elderly care and resource counselor. You could also hire an attorney who specializes in elder care law. They have a license to defend and are well-versed in elder care issues. Both these types of professionals can assist in many ways and most of the time they're trustworthy. You can search online for highly rated professionals.

 

[spinnaker]

@spinnaker So much detail that we don't know about your live, but with what you did say - one though.

If you don't have closeness with anyone, then maybe consider hiring a personnel life elderly care and resource counselor. You could also hire an attorney who specializes in elder care law. They have a license to defend and are well-versed in elder care issues. Both these types of professionals can assist in many ways and most of the time they're trustworthy. You can search online for highly rated professionals.

I am only 60.

I have tried the natural remedies like melatonin. Nothing is working.

This is not initial panic. I have had tinnitus for about 30 years and have always been able to accept it and deal with it. It is only the last couple of weeks that it has been really, really bad.

 

[spinnaker]

I remember early on when I lacked sleep due to tinnitus. It was really rough. I didn't want to drive. I eventually started using a sound machine and found a masking sound that works for me. Now sleep is more manageable. What helps me during the day is just being outside. It helps get my mind off the tinnitus. Also the sunlight and activity helps me sleep. I don't blame you for not driving under those conditions. Possibly not safe. But walking is and maybe you can walk to the markets? Just a thought.

Walk to markets? Ha. This is not the city nearest supermarket is 5 or more miles away up a busy road.

 

[spinnaker]

@spinnaker So much detail that we don't know about your live, but with what you did say - one though.

If you don't have closeness with anyone, then maybe consider hiring a personnel life elderly care and resource counselor. You could also hire an attorney who specializes in elder care law. They have a license to defend and are well-versed in elder care issues. Both these types of professionals can assist in many ways and most of the time they're trustworthy. You can search online for highly rated professionals.

And I can't afford to live the rest of my life that way.

 

[MattS]

Has something changed with the tinnitus in the last few weeks?

If not: the it *is* time to see a psychologist, I'd say.

 

[linearb]

I did not have to go to a convalescent home because of my tinnitus.

I did spend the better part of two years being worried to the point of near-psychosis that my tinnitus was going to make me unable to function and I'd lose my job and be out on the street.

Guess what? During onset we were barely scraping by, off of my income from a non-profit in a junior role. Now I am in a senior role at a major multinational making three times as much, my wife works part time again (after taking mom time off), and for the moment, we're set up nicely in the woods, at least until the economy completely burns to the ground in the next recession. So, the last ten years have sucked for tinnitus, but by every other measure they've been pretty damn good. That's definitely a mixed bag, I am not saying the one makes up for the other, but given the choice between having tinnitus and living comfortably vs on the street, well, easy decision as long as it's mine to make.

Figure out what things you want, and fight for them <3

 

[JohnAdams]

I did not have to go to a convalescent home because of my tinnitus.

I did spend the better part of two years being worried to the point of near-psychosis that my tinnitus was going to make me unable to function and I'd lose my job and be out on the street.

Guess what? During onset we were barely scraping by, off of my income from a non-profit in a junior role. Now I am in a senior role at a major multinational making three times as much, my wife works part time again (after taking mom time off), and for the moment, we're set up nicely in the woods, at least until the economy completely burns to the ground in the next recession. So, the last ten years have sucked for tinnitus, but by every other measure they've been pretty damn good. That's definitely a mixed bag, I am not saying the one makes up for the other, but given the choice between having tinnitus and living comfortably vs on the street, well, easy decision as long as it's mine to make.

Figure out what things you want, and fight for them <3

Thank you for that. I'm in the first part of your explanation right now, junior role at a multinational, worried that I am going to get worse and lose my job and ruin my family's life.

 

[linearb]

Thank you for that. I'm in the first part of your explanation right now, junior role at a multinational, worried that I am going to get worse and lose my job and ruin my family's life.

if there has been one basically universal truth to my life -- worrying about things is almost always worse than the reality, and even when it's not, if you're stuck in the reality anyway then what good was the worry?

I try to recognize my own anxiety, and heed it right up to the point where it changes my behavior, and then do my best to just kick it in a corner. A motorcycle is a trivial example: they are, by any reasonable measure, irrationally, unreasonably dangerous. I am aware of that every time I sit on one, but, I've made the decision to ride them, so that anxiety is only useful up to the point that it causes me to be a more aware, cautious driver... after that, it's a dangerous distraction.

 

[Tom Cnyc]

Thank you for that. I'm in the first part of your explanation right now, junior role at a multinational, worried that I am going to get worse and lose my job and ruin my family's life.

I also was 100% sure I'd lose my job. I was sleeping an hour a night, tops. Was barely functional. 3 years later I've earned two promotions and while I can't say I tripled my salary like @linearb - I have added nearly 50%. Much like both of you, I work at a large multi-national holding company.

The first year sucks but human nature is to adapt. Ironically I sleep better now than I have in most of my life.

 

[Vicki14]

It is only the last couple of weeks that it has been really, really bad.

What has suddenly caused it to worsen?

 

[Nanny chocolate]

@spinnaker
What part of the world are you from? Are any Tinnitus Talk members near by who could visit you?
Hideous for you to feel so trapped and alone. You have received some wonderful advice but maybe it's difficult to take it when your personal resources are so depleted.
Is there ANYONE you could call on to help you just a little.

Eve

 

[spinnaker]

@spinnaker
What part of the world are you from? Are any Tinnitus Talk members near by who could visit you?
Hideous for you to feel so trapped and alone. You have received some wonderful advice but maybe it's difficult to take it when your personal resources are so depleted.
Is there ANYONE you could call on to help you just a little.

Eve

I live in Pittsburgh, PA and would love a visit. Just PM me.

 

[Nanny chocolate]

@spinnaker
Sadly I'm in the U.K. so a visit is not possible by me.
Do you have a Facebook local tinnitus group? We all know what is like to be completely floored by severe tinnitus so I wonder if you might find a more local contact?

A daily text or email from someone might just give you a little uplift.
Eve

 

[spinnaker]

@spinnaker
Sadly I'm in the U.K. so a visit is not possible by me.
Do you have a Facebook local tinnitus group? We all know what is like to be completely floored by severe tinnitus so I wonder if you might find a more local contact?

A daily text or email from someone might just give you a little uplift.
Eve

No I hate Facebook.

And thanks for the kind thought, that helps.

 

[Nanny chocolate]

Shame about Facebook but hopefully someone closer to you will pick up on your post.
You are a tinnitus veteran and you've managed for all these years somehow. Living alone might make your tinnitus feel even more debilitating. First line is not meds but to get some support - human contact.
Wishing you to feel better.
Eve

 

[glynis]

@spinnaker,
Shame we all live so far away from each other.

love glynis

 

[spinnaker]

Shame about Facebook but hopefully someone closer to you will pick up on your post.
You are a tinnitus veteran and you've managed for all these years somehow. Living alone might make your tinnitus feel even more debilitating. First line is not meds but to get some support - human contact.
Wishing you to feel better.
Eve

Well I had to go to meds. Got some Xanax today from my PCP. I hope it lets me relax, sleep and at least reduces the sound as it has for some. Please hold me in your good thoughts.

 

[Lynny]

I also was 100% sure I'd lose my job. I was sleeping an hour a night, tops. Was barely functional. 3 years later I've earned two promotions and while I can't say I tripled my salary like @linearb - I have added nearly 50%. Much like both of you, I work at a large multi-national holding company.

The first year sucks but human nature is to adapt. Ironically I sleep better now than I have in most of my life.

So much respect for you and @linearb

I hate the word but its quite inspiring

 

[spinnaker]

So much respect for you and @linearb

I hate the word but its quite inspiring

Dittos give me hope.
Hope Candy is still listening!

 

[spinnaker]

@spinnaker
Sadly I'm in the U.K. so a visit is not possible by me.
Do you have a Facebook local tinnitus group? We all know what is like to be completely floored by severe tinnitus so I wonder if you might find a more local contact?

A daily text or email from someone might just give you a little uplift.
Eve

Actually after rereading my response, I meant ANYONE. Not that you still aren't welcome if you want to jump on a plane.

 

[slc]

Hello Spinnaker, I'm not a big Amazon fan , but I think they bought out Whole Foods. Maybe there is a way you can get a Whole Foods delivery to your house assuming that the price is not too overwhelming .

Just got back from visiting a friend in Boston on a bad day ( which I know doesn't touch the bad days that you are now having ) so that was six hours in the car. Way too much !

Hope the Xanax helps. Xanax or Klonopin are the 2 most common off label go-to drugs with some studies backing them up so there is a reasonable chance it offers some relief.

I'm big into holistic approaches but the western drugs can sometimes break the painful cycle in my experience.

Hugs,
Stephan

 

[Nanny chocolate]

Your part of your Country sounds good so you never know!
Eve
@spinnaker