Help. I'm in a Horrible Horrible Place.

[ICanDealWIthThis]

Third night of tinnitus. I can't fall asleep. The fan doesn't block it out. Water sounds and white noise can block it, but only at a volume that they keep me awake. I'm pacing around, drinking water, trying everything I can. I've dozed off but It's just little bouts of half-sleep.

Also my right ear (the one closest to the blast) is hurting. Is my hearing just going? In a weird way I almost wish I'd go deaf so I can be free from the whine.

I've never felt so low. I've never felt so hopeless. It's like I'm grieving my past life and trying to settle into my new life of misery, and it hasn't even been a week.

People said it gets rough adjusting at first, but I had no idea it would be like this. Please say something, anything, to keep me losing my mind.

 

[Marie79]

Are you able to get prescribed Xanax just to help you through this beginning? You are so new in and it will probably go away. DO NOT read the horror stories. I messed myself up with that.

 

[Michael Leigh]

People said it gets rough adjusting at first, but I had no idea it would be like this. Please say something, anything, to keep me losing my mind.

Tinnitus does improve with time. Please click on the links below and read my articles: Tinnitus, A Personal View and Hyperacusis, As I see it. Try to read them in full and not skim through them. Try not to sleep in a quiet room at night as this will make you focus on the tinnitus more. Use sound enrichment. More is explained in the articles.

All the best
Michael
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/tinnitus-a-personal-view.18668/
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/hyperacusis-as-i-see-it.19174/

 

[TuneOut]

@ICanDealWIthThis,

I know how you feel. I've been there. And things will get better. You will feel better. You will get past this place, with some time. Try to relax and get some sleep, my friend.

 

[PaulBe]

Most of us have been exactly where you are. I didn't hear it when I slept, which became a workable incentive to sleep.

 

[jjflyman]

Also my right ear (the one closest to the blast) is hurting

In my experience with T (both 12 years ago and currently) Pain and "fullness" is normal with a acute noise induced Tinnitus, so is sensitivity to noise and changes in pressure.This will improve over the next few months. Can you give some detail on what happened with the firework? how close were you, how loud was it....ect.
I know your worried and depressed right now, but the good news is there is a very good chance the Tinnitus will fade over time, and you will improve greatly, possibly fading to zero. The bad news is it will take a long time. Sometimes as long as 2 years to fully fade. Some members here have had T for many years (from many reasons) and for them it is unfortunately a permanent condition, but most people who are exposed to a loud noise, the T is temporary and will slowly fade within 1-2 years.

 

[Lex]

I got T and H almost a year ago. It was hell. I was in a horrible place back then, then things got better. But the cycle continues -- horrible, better, horrible, better. Currently, I'm back in a horrible place and thisclose to giving up. But I remind myself that I fought for almost a year, I can do this. I made a promise to myself that I'll last for as long as I can.

I believe you can, too. Most people get better, habituate, or both. But you have to give it time.

 

[slipware]

Don't read doom and gloom posts, have you had prednisone or seen an ENT specialist? It's very early days, don't give up hope of it improving.

 

[Sweetiepiestef]

My T was super loud the first week and a half. It was a scary and screaming high pitched sound. Mind you I am only into my 3rd week with T so I am no expert but it quieted down a lot at the end of the 2nd week. See if you could take some melatonin to get some rest. It seems to lower mine to a small level. I know what works for one might not work for another but it might not hurt to try? Good luck and hugs!

 

[Bill Bauer]

Amitriptyline is non-addictive. I was able to use it as a sleeping pill. After taking 10 mg (or 7.5 mg), I would not feel drowsy the next morning.
There is hope that you will be ok, see the studies described at
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/spontaneous-recovery-stats-over-70-recover-3-studies.21441/
People in those studies got their tinnitus as a result of gunshots. So their cases are similar to your case. As you can see, most of them had recovered. You may consider HBOT therapy. Search this site to learn more about HBOT.

 

[ICanDealWIthThis]

Hey thanks a million, everyone. I managed to get to sleep eventually with the white noise, and miraculously, I took the earbuds out several hours later and managed to doze off without hearing it. I think this means I don't hear it in my sleep. I'm pretty sure that my intermittent sleep was due to the white noise generator, so tonight I'll have it switch off after 30 minutes or so.

I was able again to take a walk this morning and let the ambient noise block it out. That's also a good sign. It's more or less back to the level it was yesterday morning.

This gives me hope.

Still, I feel totally rattled from last night. I feel like that dark place I was in scarred me emotionally, even if I can move on.

I'm seeing an ENT today. I hope I can get something for the sleep if it continues to be a problem, and maybe get some meds to help speed the recovery. I also just need more information about people who've had an incident like mine.

 

[Bill Bauer]

I managed to get to sleep eventually with the white noise, and miraculously, I took the earbuds out several hours later and managed to doze off without hearing it.

If you read this forum, you will see that many recommend to stop using earbuds, or even over-the-ear headphones (even at low volume). You can get a sound machine
https://www.amazon.com/Cherry-Koala-Concentration-Relaxation-Sufferers/dp/B01FRW2WBA or even
https://www.amazon.com/Sound-Oasis-S-5000-Deluxe-Therapy/dp/B018KUVEOM
or you can use your computer + speakers + YouTube...

You may want to stay away from moderately loud noises that healthy people don't even notice (e.g., blender, vacuum cleaner, lawn mower). Listen to your body - if noises like that feel uncomfortable, try not to be around them, or wear ear protection (ear plugs or Peltor muffs)
https://www.amazon.com/PELTOR-Ear-Muff-Headband-X5A/dp/B00BBCTQK6

 

[Bill Bauer]

I hope I can get something for the sleep if it continues to be a problem

My ENT wouldn't prescribe anything like that. You need to get your family doctor to do that. You can also show up at the emergency late in the evening, and they can give you a couple of days' supply...

 

[GregCA]

If you read this forum, you will see that many recommend to stop using earbuds, or even over-the-ear headphones (even at low volume).

If you want professional advice about it, ask real professionals around you (ENT doctors, audiologists, neurotologists, tinnitus doctors). You'll see they can have a very different take on this.

 

[Bill Bauer]

If you want professional advice about it, ask real professionals around you (ENT doctors, audiologists, neurotologists, tinnitus doctors). You'll see they can have a very different take on this.

I don't know anything about neurotologists and tinnitus doctors.

I know that ENTs and audiologists don't know much about tinnitus. They don't know the prognosis, they don't know what can be done to get better, and they don't know what makes it worse.

 

[GregCA]

I know that ENTs and audiologists don't know much about tinnitus.

Most of the ones I've met were reasonably knowledgeable about it. They may not have known the latest and greatest research, but they were all knowledgeable about what it is in high level and what the leading theories behind it were. Some of the audiologists I saw volunteered that they also suffered from T.

We may not like that they tell us there isn't any cure or any reliable way to manage the symptoms, but that doesn't make them ignorant: it just means they tell it like it is. It's rough to hear and we can certainly fault them for lacking tact at times, but the state of the art isn't necessarily their fault.

They don't know the prognosis

Nobody on earth knows. It seems unfair to ding them for being unable to do what nobody else on earth can do either.

they don't know what can be done to get better

Nobody on earth knows. It seems unfair to ding them for being unable to do what nobody else on earth can do either.

they don't know what makes it worse.

They certainly have a larger patient list than any forum self appointed expert (my neurotologist alone has a few thousand patients). That's a statistically significant data set to come up with reasonably valid conclusions. If a statistically significant amount of patients came and said "this made my T worse", I don't think they'd withhold that information from you.

 

[Bill Bauer]

We may not like that they tell us there isn't any cure or any reliable way to manage the symptoms, but that doesn't make them ignorant: it just means they tell it like it is.

I disagree. They tell us that it is permanent, and don't tell us that there is a relatively high chance that T will get quieter or even disappear.
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/poll-did-the-severity-of-your-tinnitus-change-over-time.22707
What they say contradicts all of the studies I could find on the subject
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/spontaneous-recovery-stats-over-70-recover-3-studies.21441/
as well as the experiences of people on this forum. Note, these are not the Latest studies - some were done in 1980s or 1990s. If T is so common, you would expect those professionals to be aware of the studies regarding its prognosis.

 

[Mkc28]

Well I've been to two Ent.'s and both said no pressure in ear and that's about it. At least no one has told me it's permanent but no more advice. No mention of Audiologists, Neurotologists etc. I do have another appt. with last ent. who gave me a water pill which made it worst! So I guess I'll see what more he has to say. My dentist gave me more info than them.

 

[GregCA]

They tell us that it is permanent, and don't tell us that there is a relatively high chance that T will get quieter or even disappear.

None of the guys I've seen (and I've seen quite a few!) told me it was permanent. Where do you get that they tell us it is permanent?

A lot of what you will get out of a doctor is what you put in. If you don't challenge, drive, question, and generally come in with enough knowledge to ask intelligent questions, you are likely to come out very underwhelmed. It takes both the patient and the doctor to make a consultation fruitful.

Have you actually asked your doctors "is there a chance that T will get quieter or even disappear?"

 

[ICanDealWIthThis]

I went to the ENT, and my hearing test came back totally normal. So that's the good news.

The ENT himself told me not to worry, and come back in 6 weeks if it persists. He was perfectly polite and courteous, but I did get a subtle vibe that he didn't think it was more than me obsessing over it. He said everyone has some degree of ringing. He asked if I was the kind of person that worries about things (I had to say I am).

He didn't prescribe meds, but he did say to cut back on salt, chocolate, and coffee (they raise BP which makes the T worse). He said to keep some music on in the background if I can and try not to stress about it.

So I am reassured to some degree. The hearing test results definitely help, and the doctor seemed pretty unconcerned, so I guess I'll just keep waiting it out. As long as I can sleep, I'm happy.

 

[Bill Bauer]

Have you actually asked your doctors "is there a chance that T will get quieter or even disappear?"

I did. The doctor's response was "if it doesn't go away after one year, it is permanent." I wish he were to tell me that there is a relatively high chance that it will get quieter, and that there is a relatively high chance that it will disappear within the first 12 months. I was at his office 3 days after the onset of my T and 14 days after my acoustic trauma. He didn't offer any of those injections and he refused to extend my 7 day course of prednisone.

 

[Bill Bauer]

Where do you get that they tell us it is permanent?

Many posts on this forum describe those ENT visits as ENTs advising the posters to get used to T (implying T is permanent).

 

[GregCA]

Many posts on this forum describe those ENT visits as ENTs advising the posters to get used to T (implying T is permanent).

Telling you to get used to it doesn't imply it's permanent. It's giving you a piece of advice that will work whether it's permanent or not.

You also have to exercise some judgement when reading many posts complaining about something: there is a sampling bias in this community, in addition to the natural bias that humans have in reporting bad experiences (vs good experiences - which are "expected"). I doubt you are going to find posts where people state "oh and the ENT didn't tell me it was permanent" even when that fact didn't happen. It's easier to list things that actually happened rather than the large amount of things that didn't happen.

I don't doubt you've had a bad experience with your ENT doctor (and s/he may indeed be a bad doctor), but I think your generalization is unwarranted.

 

[GregCA]

He didn't offer any of those injections and he refused to extend my 7 day course of prednisone.

Did your dissatisfaction with this doctor lead you to consult another one?

 

[Jake007]

As long as I can sleep, I'm happy.

Me to ha! Sleep is nice. If ambient noise blocks out your t and you have no hearing loss the odds are in your favor. Do what you can to take your mind off of it, try not to think about it. Protect your ears for now so it don't get worse. And through my experience audiologist are more experienced with tinnitus. Mine was anyway.

 

[Bill Bauer]

Did your dissatisfaction with this doctor lead you to consult another one?

I asked my family doctor to send me to another ENT. Back in March, my family doctor warned me that ENT will not treat my case (someone who has had T for a month) as urgent. I didn't realize HOW not urgent it was going to be. My family doctor told me that ENT's receptionist will call me to setup an appointment. I still haven't heard from the receptionist(!) I live in Canada, but even by Canadian standards this is taking too long. I guess this ENT knows that there is nothing he can do for me.

Another thing to keep in mind is that things like injections and prednisone are effective when taken early on. I was fortunate enough to be at the doctor's office early enough for these things to still be effective. Yet the doctor never offered any of these treatments to me.

 

[TuneOut]

If you want professional advice about it, ask real professionals around you (ENT doctors, audiologists, neurotologists, tinnitus doctors). You'll see they can have a very different take on this.

What is the consensus?

 

[Tinker Bell]

Another thing to keep in mind is that things like injections and prednisone are effective when taken early on. I was fortunate enough to be at the doctor's office early enough for these things to still be effective. Yet the doctor never offered any of these treatments to me.

I really think it depends on the skill level and expertise of the doctor. The first ENT that I saw ordered an MRI and prescribed an oral steroid. I called her back with additional questions, including whether I could try intratympanic injections. She did not do them and claimed that they only work in 1 percent of cases. I have no idea where she got that stat, it doesn't match anything I've read or been told since.

So I went to a second ENT. He was great. Very thorough, spent 90 minutes with me and made sure to answer all of my questions as best he could and promised to look into anything he did not know. He even called me at home the next day to give me more information, and called two other times to offer more info and check in on me. I asked him about injections. He did not do them, but he agreed they were worth trying and referred me to an ENT specialist who could.

Not even a week later, I was able to see that specialist. He was amazing, definitely an expert in his field and he specializes in ear conditions. He sees patients with both hearing loss and tinnitus nearly every day.

So I'm glad that I pushed. I think the first doctor was okay, but just not as knowledgeable as the other two ENTs.

 

[GregCA]

What is the consensus?

I don't know about the global consensus, but out of the professionals I've consulted with, all of them (and there's been quite a few of them - ENT docs, audiologists, neurotologist, tinnitus "expert" in UCSF) have told me that headphones were totally OK, as long as the volume was kept to a reasonable level.
Note the bolded caveat.

 

[GregCA]

My family doctor told me that ENT's receptionist will call me to setup an appointment. I still haven't heard from the receptionist(!) I live in Canada, but even by Canadian standards this is taking too long.

Have you contacted them to see if you somehow fell through the cracks?