How Can You Live with Tinnitus When You Are Alone?

[Bill Bauer]

Evidently you haven't because it seems that you weren't fond of any of these women, nor did you take their pleasure into account.

I would tell you if the above were to be true. It isn't.

And anyone with even the smallest ounce of social awareness will tell you that there is a big difference.

I understand that. So if even that sucked, imagine how I would feel about "a relationship" or "a wife". It will have to be "a life without compromises" for me.

Never saw these women as anything more than tools for you to get your rocks off.

I never did, but that doesn't mean that I didn't care about them, wasn't thankful for them being in my life, didn't wish the best for them, didn't get emotionally close to them.

Piss poor at sex

It would be my partners who would have to be bad at sex for me to feel this way, but I can assure you that they were fine.

With how far your head is up your own ass

No, I am not oblivious to reality. Of course I am happy to acknowledge that everyone is different. Many of you are paying more for your addiction than what you get in return, and I feel sorry for you. I am just trying to show those who aren't actually addicted that there is another way.

 

[Bill Bauer]

p.s.

nor did you take their pleasure into account

In addition to exchanging daily e-mail messages with me, one of them (she was a professional in her 30s at the time) had been writing a daily dairy addressed to me. I didn't make her feel this way by not taking her pleasure into account and not getting emotionally close to her.

The fact that your predictions have been so off shows that you are the one whose model of the world is in need of being adjusted.

 

[linearb]

I just saw this post. I see your posts sometimes, and a lot of the time I am impressed (in a good way). Specifically I respect that you are able to enjoy solitude where you live and that you have had supplies like N100 masks since before the start of the pandemic. My policy of placing the people who smoke weed on my Ignore list might have gotten me to discard the "baby" (you) with the bathwater.

Having said the above, it wasn't very nice of you to make a post attacking me, when you knew that you are on my Ignore list and I would be unlikely to defend myself.

I am going to agree that my post was not very nice, that this was needless, and that I could have expressed all the same things in a way that would not have been condescending or snarky.

I also see that you have gotten some very hostile responses from other posters, resorting to lots of cursing and ad hominems, and that makes me sad.

I disagree with you on a lot, but you spend a lot of time here trying to offer advice and comfort to people.

I apologize for not making my point in a nicer way, and, really, whether or not you pursue or enjoy sex is not something that should matter to me at all -- nor should the choice of herbs I grow and inhale matter to you, I suspect?

Anyway, that's really all I've got to say -- I hope you see this. Some people have really gone off on you in ways that are just not reasonable or appropriate, I don't want any part of that, and to the extent I have poured fuel on that fire, I feel bad.

I fundamentally and radically view sex, human interactions and pornography a lot different than you do, but I should be okay with that because I'm hardly the sharpest knife in the drawer so it'd be a little myopic to assume I have it all figured out.

Bill, I will say, your tendency to put people on ignore, but then read and reply to their posts, and point OUT that you have them on ignore -- I find that pretty grating, because whatever your intent, it's easy to read that as a manipulative way to have a one sided conversation. I don't care if you have me on ignore, or not, but if you're going to take the time to reply to me, you don't really need to point it out, do you? If you can throw me a bone and knock it off with that, I would appreciate it. In any case I will try to be a better, more empathetic citizen in these interactions.

Yes, the irony of accusing you of a lack of empathy in a post where I went out of my way to be a dick to you is... well, I'd say ironic, but actually it just makes me look stupid.

 

[GlennS]

So I'm reading through this thread and unless my eyes are lying to me then the argument has a 3-year break and then picks up again? Why not let sleeping dogs lie?

They say never argue politics or religion. I've learned that this extends to any personal convictions which are tantamount to religion. This includes things like personal health (especially belief systems around diet/nutrition, vaccination), child rearing (especially home schooling advocates), and now, apparently, thoughts around whether/how to engage in relationships.

I actually have a LOT of thoughts on this matter but why bother sharing them when the discourse has proven to be nasty?

Here's the thing. Different strokes for different folks. It's hard for people to understand how others can have wildly different priorities. It becomes EASIER to understand that other people may not just be "doing life wrong" as you get older and realize that even you don't see life the same way you did 20-30 years ago anymore. It really humbles you. But early in life you tend to be filled with "received wisdom" about how to go about life. You've got a goal motivating you based on a leap of faith that it's worth striving for. But personal experience is the best teacher. There are a lot of things in life that turn out not to be all it's cracked up to be. I wish it were not the case, but it's true.

 

[Bill Bauer]

Bill, I will say, your tendency to put people on ignore, but then read and reply to their posts, and point OUT that you have them on ignore -- I find that pretty grating, because whatever your intent, it's easy to read that as a manipulative way to have a one sided conversation.

I think that when I put people on my Ignore list I end up not seeing most of their posts, so perhaps its a good idea to let them know, so that they don't expect a response from me. However, when I reply to the people on my Ignore list I make sure to read their responses. For what it's worth, you are now permanently off of my Ignore list. LOL

 

[Juan]

They say never argue politics or religion. I've learned that this extends to any personal convictions which are tantamount to religion. This includes things like personal health (especially belief systems around diet/nutrition, vaccination), child rearing (especially home schooling advocates), and now, apparently, thoughts around whether/how to engage in relationships.

That's wise haha.. .

We should all live in an old western movie where people barely talk hehehe :-P

Or in a silent movie. That'll be awesome T-wise.