For those of you, who are staying at home for the majority of the time, how are you doing mentally? What's your situation? Do you still work? How do you work without making yourself worse? Do you have friends that come over? Is your family supportive? How do you get through the days without going crazy? Do you still have hope that your hyperacusis can get better?
Life is hell.
We're all suffering with you. I know it isn't much consolation but some people are suffering far worse than we are. They'd kill for a safe place to sleep and eat everyday LOL.
Mentally it's up and down. some days I'm optimistic, convinced that if I get into a solid routine, consistent noise exposure to non-noxious sounds, low inflammatory carnivore diet, fasting... I'll heal. Then other days I'm chain smoking cigarettes and binge eating LMFAO. Not conducive to recovery.
I'm about to get a job working from home I guess. Data entry. Minimal noise exposure hopefully. Maybe that'll get me more into a routine.
I'm not super worried about worsening to be honest... I think i would've worsened already since my severe onset in 2022. I've been more or less baseline since then. Like you said, there are stages to this emotionally. You come to grips with it in a way. although I definitely could faceplant at some point, especially if I get worse. But part of this -- at least it seems -- is relaxing into our reality. Stop being afraid of every little noise, even if it's kinda painful. That little clicking in the walls, a lawnmower going off, the garbage guy coming through -- it probably won't make you worse, so just chill. Just avoid those super traumatic noises close to your ears or whatever.
No friends. No GF. No community except randoms on the internet. LMFAO.
Family is supportive. Just my mom letting me live in her quiet condo in SoCal.
On my good days, I meditate a lot. Literally meditate for 20-30 minutes. Take a break. 2 hours later, same thing. At one point, I was meditating for damn near 3 hours a day. Quite literally imagining a future where I heal from this. Once you get good at meditation, it actually feels real that it could happen.
I was able to pull off an 8 day dry fast recently, hoping it would help. Sadly, dry fasting didn't LOL. Although I still believe in it. Just gotta be more consistent along with the carnivore diet.
And yes, I still have years of hope left. I mean there's no alternative... suicide? Nah. Things are still pretty damn good, looking at the big picture. Safe, quiet place to sleep. Sunlight through the window. Occasional fresh air with earmuffs on. Food. My mom. Mostly quiet dogs. Getting a job that pays shit but will at least give me some degree of self-worth.
It's hard to be grateful sometimes but yeah, like I said, some people would trade what we have. Imagine doing life in a Supermax prison. 23 hour lockdown, like El Chapo LMFAO. I bet he would take noxacusis in a heartbeat.
Anyway, I'm not sure how bad you are... I'm not catastrophic but definitely severe. Can't even make my own bed without earmuffs on.
Fucked up condition but hey... there's still hope. This is just our challenge.
It's like one dude told me once: "even if your life was perfect, you'd still find something to complain about."
That little comment has stuck with me because it's true. Give me perfect ears and a busy life, and I'd still be thinking it's somehow not good enough, which is kinda how I thought before I got noxacusis.
The reality is -- noxacusis or no noxacusis -- there are always tough challenges in life. Happy, successful people meet them with consistently solid decision making. Unhappy people don't. Just gotta find a modality of healing and attack it with a consistent mindset day in, day out. A slow, steady onslaught.
Easier said than done with this fucking thing though, I know.