How Do You Cope with Your Work?

[Christophe_85]

Hello everyone,

Tomorrow I go back to my work after a long break due to depression...

I am quite afraid because I remember having very long days hearing tinnitus at work... Or was it because I really felt bad? I am not sure...

From your side, what kind of work do you do?

And how do you cope with it everyday?

All the Best!

Christophe

 

[Kolisar]

Hi @Christophe_85.

Depression does affect tinnitus. They can actually create a vicious cycle where the tinnitus makes the depression worst, and the depression then makes the tinnitus worse. For many of us, you cannot get away from the tinnitus, no matter how hard you try.

For my work, it is mainly at a desk, working with computers. Occasionally I end up in a lab space for a couple weeks, and the lab space is rather loud because of all the computers, servers, and other equipment.

I honestly do not know how I cope with it, I just keep going because I don't really have any other choice. I need to work to pay my bills, and I have to be in the office, or in the lab to work. I will listen to music with headphones (which is NOT recommended with tinnitus, see the following post for details https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/headphones-and-tinnitus.12062/ ), but otherwise, I just deal with it.

 

[supernovae]

Hi @Christophe_85
I am a computer engineer so as @Kolisar I work mainly at my desk. Even though I work in a open space office, it is normally quiet.
I actually find working one of the few "activities" that makes me forget about T for some time, since I tend to be really focused on the task I am working on. I actually never mentioned T to my colleagues in order to reduce as much as possible the situations when I am aware of it.
I believe it is an important step for you to come back to work and you should use that time to just drift your mind away from T.

Best of luck

 

[glynis]

Christophe_85,
Wishing you all the best for your return to work.
Just go at your own pace and keep pressure down and one or two short breaks and I'm sure you will be fine...
Let us know how your first day back went.
I work in a school and back to work today after the big summer break so looking forward to meeting the new classes.
Love glynis

 

[Christophe_85]

Hi @Christophe_85.

Depression does affect tinnitus. They can actually create a vicious cycle where the tinnitus makes the depression worst, and the depression then makes the tinnitus worse. For many of us, you cannot get away from the tinnitus, no matter how hard you try.

For my work, it is mainly at a desk, working with computers. Occasionally I end up in a lab space for a couple weeks, and the lab space is rather loud because of all the computers, servers, and other equipment.

I honestly do not know how I cope with it, I just keep going because I don't really have any other choice. I need to work to pay my bills, and I have to be in the office, or in the lab to work. I will listen to music with headphones (which is NOT recommended with tinnitus, see the following post for details https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/headphones-and-tinnitus.12062/ ), but otherwise, I just deal with it.

Hello Kolisar,

I agree with you regarding the vicious circle...

I also work in front of a computer, it is not that loud but still when I discuss and share things with colleagues it can be loud...

Fortunatly I don't work in a open-space anymore !

Even without T and H I really didn't like this kind of work environnment !

For me too I also have to work to pay my bills and different things...

So you listen to your headphones everyday ?

 

[Christophe_85]

Hi @Christophe_85
I am a computer engineer so as @Kolisar I work mainly at my desk. Even though I work in a open space office, it is normally quiet.
I actually find working one of the few "activities" that makes me forget about T for some time, since I tend to be really focused on the task I am working on. I actually never mentioned T to my colleagues in order to reduce as much as possible the situations when I am aware of it.
I believe it is an important step for you to come back to work and you should use that time to just drift your mind away from T.

Best of luck

Hello supernovae,

Good for you if the open-space is normally quiet !

Thank you for your wise message and yes in fact I am happy to go back to my work... Even if mornings can be difficult to wake up and be motivated to face the whole day...

How did you get your T ?

 

[Christophe_85]

Christophe_85,
Wishing you all the best for your return to work.
Just go at your own pace and keep pressure down and one or two short breaks and I'm sure you will be fine...
Let us know how your first day back went.
I work in a school and back to work today after the big summer break so looking forward to meeting the new classes.
Love glynis

Hello Glynis !

Thank you for your kind message...

Today was very ok with most of my colleagues were welcoming me very nicely...

Not too loud in the school where you are ?

All the Best !

Christophe

 

[glynis]

Hi @Christophe_85,
Glad your first day back went well for you!
Had a lovely first day of term and lots of laughs and smiles ....
Ears still naughty as ever
..Love glynis

 

[Kolisar]

So you listen to your headphones everyday ?

I do, as much as possible, I know I should not, and I certainly would never recommend it for anyone, regardless of if they have tinnitus. I won't go into my reasons for using them as this is your post and I want to keep it focused on your questions and providing you the support you are requesting.

 

[Alue]

I don't cope well. I'm forced to work in an noisy office (there is a server in my office and there's smooth walls and smooth ceiling that just amplify the noise). There are a lot of other loud noises that I occasionally work around. Work cause my T and H too.

 

[supernovae]

How did you get your T ?

Indoor concert. It started mild but a second moderate noise exposure made it worst (and gave me H as well) . It was really hard to cope with for the first months, specially because T used to fluctuate a lot in response to external noises. Lately it has been quite stable (apart from a really bad spike a couple of nights ago out of nowhere) which makes easier to deal with it

 

[Mentos]

I play radio at my Desk which masks my T (fortunately my mates don't mind it), and I try to focus on my tasks. Still difficult especially at meetings in silent conference room as that's where I notice my T most

 

[Christophe_85]

Hi @Christophe_85,
Glad your first day back went well for you!
Had a lovely first day of term and lots of laughs and smiles ....
Ears still naughty as ever
..Love glynis

Thanks Glynis !

So everyday after your work, your ears feel bad ?

 

[Christophe_85]

I do, as much as possible, I know I should not, and I certainly would never recommend it for anyone, regardless of if they have tinnitus. I won't go into my reasons for using them as this is your post and I want to keep it focused on your questions and providing you the support you are requesting.

The thing is if you don't listen too loud it should not be a problem...

But yes I wouldn't listen to any headphones but this is because I am scared of that...

 

[Christophe_85]

Indoor concert. It started mild but a second moderate noise exposure made it worst (and gave me H as well) . It was really hard to cope with for the first months, specially because T used to fluctuate a lot in response to external noises. Lately it has been quite stable (apart from a really bad spike a couple of nights ago out of nowhere) which makes easier to deal with it

So now can you go out with friends, in bars per example ?

 

[Christophe_85]

I play radio at my Desk which masks my T (fortunately my mates don't mind it), and I try to focus on my tasks. Still difficult especially at meetings in silent conference room as that's where I notice my T most

Hello Mentos,

You put the sound very low ?

 

[supernovae]

So now can you go out with friends, in bars per example ?

In the beginning I did not, specially because T got much worse after being into a bar for some hours without ear protection. That was after a month from the initial T onset and at that time I did not have much knowledge about T...
Then I lived some months in almost complete isolation, every "loud" noise would spike my T, even people talking around me, no matter what ear protection I used. I believe that behaviour was magnified by H. I followed some advices from the forum, like sleeping at night with sound enrichment and gradually things got a bit better. I still have H but it is much milder than before. And also something in my mind changed. Lately I started again to go out to restaurants and bars. Last weekend I even went to the cinema and I did not notice any change in the T. Of course I am not ready for concerts or clubs (and I am not sure I will ever will) but I want to get my life back little by little.

 

[Mentos]

Hello Mentos,

You put the sound very low ?

Honestly I

Hello Mentos,

You put the sound very low ?

Hi Christophe,
Since my T onset (March '15, rock concert that I'll never forget) I tried many strategies: in-ear white noise maskers, rainsounds at my desk, radio, pink noise, etc. None of them is perfect and I struggle everyday to do something productive at work. I put the sound pretty low (rain sounds, radio), sometimes I work with only in-ear maskers). Somewhow still I have HUGE concentration problems at work, mainly because I have conceptual work and not task based. Other aspects of life I manage somehow, I can sleep, socialize, relax at home after work, I read in the afternoons and evenings to relax and take my mind away from T. But work is hell and frustration for me. What I honestly consider is to change my job to less paid but more tasks based so that I would not have to think about what to do, but to have tasks and execute them. This seems easier. When I developed T I thought it would be easier to deal with, but it's a beast that I have to fight till the end of my days. The thought is so depressing that I don't really think to much about the future but a rather focus everyday how to get through the day keeping my emotions under control. I know it's partially about acceptance, but not only this. I have not only accept lack of silence, but what's the most depressing I feel I lost my brain, usually I cannot think logically anymore, T is always on my mind, my thoughts meander around it 24/7. No masking can change that, I always remember it's there and even though my emotional reaction to it is on a much better level than it used to be in the beginning, I feel there's maybe 10% of my brain capacity left vs. what it was prior to T. Hence in general I gave up any plans regarding my future, I focus everyday to get through the day with as little anxiety and depression as possible. I don't hope for a long life anymore, I wish for it to be short as everyday is a suffering for me.

Sorry for being so negative and bitter, perhaps I should not be because you just try to get your life back and probabely more encouragement is what you need right now, but at times I still can't belive how 2h of fun 2.5ago at rock concert ruined my life and impacts almost every aspect of my life: work, leasure, relations with my wife and my life plans. I will nerver fogive myself for doing it to myself at this bloody concert.

 

[JoyBenz007]

I don't cope well in my quiet office.... I put a fan on or heater and listen to some music, I'd be lying if I said tinnitus hasn't affected my work.

 

[Fangen]

I work at a regular office and usually, it is not that loud as we are only 25 people sitting together and we try to be quiet so people can work in peace. But still enough sound that I don't sit and think about my T all the time.

 

[TheDanishGirl]

I am too sick to work at the moment due to the depression and anxiety. I really doubt if I will ever be able to work full hours ever again.

I applaud the people who can still maintain work while suffering from T....I don't know how you do it.

 

[Mentos]

I am too sick to work at the moment due to the depression and anxiety. I really doubt if I will ever be able to work full hours ever again.

I applaud the people who can still maintain work while suffering from T....I don't know how you do it.

@TheDanishGirl I guess it's also a matter of motivation (still I don't know how loud is yours and if it's maskable). I simply can find no motivation in me to give out all at work as I used to. Perhaps if I wanted to I would be able, but I have a constant feeling what's the point in it? What are the money for if life is miserable because of T? Will the money make me happy? No chance, I will still have these head noises with me. I used to work both for pleasure and for money. Now, there's no pleasure just frustration, and money mean nothing to me. So I very often wander how T people find motivation to work and what drives them?

 

[Christophe_85]

Honestly I


Hi Christophe,
Since my T onset (March '15, rock concert that I'll never forget) I tried many strategies: in-ear white noise maskers, rainsounds at my desk, radio, pink noise, etc. None of them is perfect and I struggle everyday to do something productive at work. I put the sound pretty low (rain sounds, radio), sometimes I work with only in-ear maskers). Somewhow still I have HUGE concentration problems at work, mainly because I have conceptual work and not task based. Other aspects of life I manage somehow, I can sleep, socialize, relax at home after work, I read in the afternoons and evenings to relax and take my mind away from T. But work is hell and frustration for me. What I honestly consider is to change my job to less paid but more tasks based so that I would not have to think about what to do, but to have tasks and execute them. This seems easier. When I developed T I thought it would be easier to deal with, but it's a beast that I have to fight till the end of my days. The thought is so depressing that I don't really think to much about the future but a rather focus everyday how to get through the day keeping my emotions under control. I know it's partially about acceptance, but not only this. I have not only accept lack of silence, but what's the most depressing I feel I lost my brain, usually I cannot think logically anymore, T is always on my mind, my thoughts meander around it 24/7. No masking can change that, I always remember it's there and even though my emotional reaction to it is on a much better level than it used to be in the beginning, I feel there's maybe 10% of my brain capacity left vs. what it was prior to T. Hence in general I gave up any plans regarding my future, I focus everyday to get through the day with as little anxiety and depression as possible. I don't hope for a long life anymore, I wish for it to be short as everyday is a suffering for me.

Sorry for being so negative and bitter, perhaps I should not be because you just try to get your life back and probabely more encouragement is what you need right now, but at times I still can't belive how 2h of fun 2.5ago at rock concert ruined my life and impacts almost every aspect of my life: work, leasure, relations with my wife and my life plans. I will nerver fogive myself for doing it to myself at this bloody concert.

Hello Mentos,

Don't be sorry ! I understand you totally !

Same for me I don't really want to live too long, especially if T and H could increase with time...
I got back to work because I have to and it is not too loud for me... But some days I just want not to get up and just stay in the bed as long as possible... To run away in my dreams...

Did you feel pain or anything at this concert back in 2015 ?

Do you wife understand your situation or not so much ?

 

[Christophe_85]

In the beginning I did not, specially because T got much worse after being into a bar for some hours without ear protection. That was after a month from the initial T onset and at that time I did not have much knowledge about T...
Then I lived some months in almost complete isolation, every "loud" noise would spike my T, even people talking around me, no matter what ear protection I used. I believe that behaviour was magnified by H. I followed some advices from the forum, like sleeping at night with sound enrichment and gradually things got a bit better. I still have H but it is much milder than before. And also something in my mind changed. Lately I started again to go out to restaurants and bars. Last weekend I even went to the cinema and I did not notice any change in the T. Of course I am not ready for concerts or clubs (and I am not sure I will ever will) but I want to get my life back little by little.

That's a good story, a positive one !

What movie did you see ?

To me I don't see myself going to the Cinema, even TV is too loud most of the time !

 

[Christophe_85]

I don't cope well in my quiet office.... I put a fan on or heater and listen to some music, I'd be lying if I said tinnitus hasn't affected my work.

Yes I agree that in very quiet places we can have the opposite effect, to hear our T too much !

Do you work full-time ?

Are you close to your office ?

 

[Mentos]

Hello Mentos,

Don't be sorry ! I understand you totally !

Same for me I don't really want to live too long, especially if T and H could increase with time...
I got back to work because I have to and it is not too loud for me... But some days I just want not to get up and just stay in the bed as long as possible... To run away in my dreams...

Did you feel pain or anything at this concert back in 2015 ?

Do you wife understand your situation or not so much ?

No pain at that concert, nothing. My wife is supportive, she's got T as well but she somehow copes much better than me. At least it does not affect her work nor other aspects of life and she's not depressed. I tried to tapper off my ADs since yesterday perhaps I'm not ready for it yet and that impacted my mood. Please ignore what I wrote before, life can still be good for us with many good moments, we just need to cherish good moments and survive bad ones. I'm doing it for over 2.5years and I'll continue this way. Stay strong and good luck at work. I hope you'll find some pleasure in your profesional career!

 

[Tweaker]

General office noise from people talking doesn't bother me. I get bothered by air con noises and computer fans or any high pitched background noises. I find it hard to block them out. They seem to make my T more noticeable. Also stress at work is a big factor.

 

[supernovae]

What movie did you see ?

I used to be part of a film club before T, so I decided to attend to an event where they were showing Blade Runner.
Not a very loud movie but I kept my custom earplugs in (17db reduction)

 

[linearb]

I write software from my house in the woods all day; when my ears are really bad, I complain to my coworkers about it and then keep making software anyway because I have a lot less control over my tinnitus than I do over whether or not my bills get paid.

 

[Fangen]

Yes I agree that in very quiet places we can have the opposite effect, to hear our T too much !

Do you work full-time ?

Are you close to your office ?

I work full time
I live 15 min away from the office by subway, wear plugs or noise cancelling headphones to and from work