I'm Devastated, Please Someone Understand Me

[Ruth Gil]

Hey.
I'm 16.

I got tinnitus on August 12th.

It has been an actual roller coaster of emotions.

I was doing a lot better but today something broke my heart.
Today I woke up with no hyperacusis so I wasn't wearing my earplugs to school. Everything was fine. Not too noisy. Not uncomfortable.

I was standing outside my school's gate waiting for my parents to pick me up, it was kinda late so there weren't that many cars passing by, plus I was a little distracted (I know my mistake) then all of the sudden an SUV (the kind people take to rallys) passed by and honked the loudest horn I've ever heard in my entire life and there was literally no other car in front of him. My tinnitus hasn't spiked but I know this made it very likely for a spike to come near so I stupidly started sobbing when my mom picked me up, when I got home, with my face wet, my brother looks at me and angrily asks me what happened, I told him and he was MERCILESS, even told my mom that I would need a shrink, that I'm going crazy.

But the cherry on the cake is that he actually called my dad (who has been quite supportive up until now, and who also suffers from tinnitus) and my dad called me to tell me that I'm indeed going crazy and that I'm taking away his peace and that he's going to have to quit his job for me and that I'm eventually going to give him a heart attack. I'm a lot better now that I poured my heart out to you guys, my other brother and my boyfriend. Still, I'm devastated.

Please show some support

 

[coffee_girl]

That is devastating to hear and i am so sorry this happened to you, your family seems to not understand how incredibly difficult life is for you currently and that is a major shame. If your ears are not spiking right now, it is a good sign that it will not spike...do you have a history of T getting worse immediately after a sudden noise? Life is so unfair when these things happen, and it is easy to feel alone in your struggles. That driver probably had no idea that he ruined your day with just a careless prank, so sorry again that you are now dealing with the repercussions.

I don't know your situation so I can't offer words of encouragement in that way, but I Really hope your parents' outburst was purely accidental and they don't mean the words they say. Wishing you the best, and hoping that your T/H does not get worse.

 

[1000]

I only can pray out for you as I pray for me and the rest of the ones suffering of hyperacusis and tinnitus.

 

[Ruth Gil]

If your ears are not spiking right now, it is a good sign that it will not spike...do you have a history of T getting worse immediately after a sudden noise?

No, my tinnitus doesn't 'react'. I sometimes get brief spikes that go away after 5 seconds, I think this is called fleeting tinnitus.

Thank you for your kind words.

 

[Vicki14]

Hey Ruth,
I think we can all understand how incredibly difficult and stressful this is for you to deal with. Unfortunately hidden conditions don't really get much sympathy or support. Your young and at a very important time in your life with exams etc and I can understand how tough this is. Stay strong and lean on those who can offer you unconditional support and strength, hopefully some form of credible help for this will be available in the not to distant future. You have your whole life ahead of you and try not to let this determine who you want to be. We are always here for support xx

 

[Sash]

It must be even more difficult for someone so young. Sometime people say things they don't really mean simply they are tired or having a bad day. Problem lies with them not you so please don't take it to heart.

Actually I get mine trying to clean out wax too around 9 months ago

 

[glynis]

@Ruth Gil ,
A warm welcome to Tinnitus Talk.
We are here around the clock to support you and know you're loved on here and we understand how you feel and what your going through.
I hope your dad comes on here with you as you need him now more than ever but he needs to know how he can support you better .
love glynis x

 

[JohnAdams]

I've had it now for 5 months, there are other people here that have had it for years. Not trying to one up you, I'm just saying we've all gone through what you are going through and trust us, there is still plenty of life in you, be patient please, there are treatments coming.

I have exhausted myself researching this and believe me, there has been A LOT of recent discoveries in the last 5 years and in the last 2 years multiple biotech companies have popped up and are right now pushing their drugs through trials. Help is on the way. I believe it with all of my mind.

 

[Striveon]

Hi Ruth, I can relate to you also, my sisters are so careless and threaten me to play loud music if I don't leave my room, if I'm in the living room, I have to leave because they play loud movies, I can't go out without them because they say they play loud music in the car and they are not going to deal with me, my little sister threatens me to turn off my fan at night when I'm sleeping so I can wake up.

It is pure bullying I know, but hey you're not alone girly, sometimes people don't understand how debilitating tinnitus can be. What if you try talking to your parents and cry your emotions out and tell them the kind of support you need.

Let them know how traumatic this event has been on you, that you simply reacting to the way you used to react. Try getting therapy to help you learn how to communicate things right and be able to improve and as I see you are improving, congratulations girly! I have hopes you'll get better, tinnitus is a mystery!

My aunt had hearing loss for 4 whole months and severe tinnitus and she cured, my uncle's father has had hearing loss since a young boy and he got tinnitus in his later years and his comes and goes for months, then leaves for months.

I'm here for you alright cheers!

 

[Ruth Gil]

trust us, there is still plenty of life in you, be patient please, there are treatments coming.

I have exhausted myself researching this and believe me, there has been A LOT of recent discoveries in the last 5 years and in the last 2 years multiple biotech companies have popped up and are right now pushing their drugs through trials. Help is on the way. I believe it with all of my mind.

Thank you for your optimism. I totally agree with you.

 

[Ruth Gil]

but hey you're not alone girly, sometimes people don't understand how debilitating tinnitus can be.

I'm here for you alright cheers!

Thank you so much for your sweet words of empathy. I hope things get better for you as well.