It Got the Best of Me: Struggling with Worsening Tinnitus, Hyperacusis, and Anxiety

Maddog

Member
Author
Mar 10, 2019
7
Tinnitus Since
2008
Cause of Tinnitus
Unknown
Hello!

I am a 31-year-old man who has been suffering from tinnitus since I was 14. I do not really know the exact cause because it started suddenly in the middle of the night around 3 AM and never went away. It might be noise induced since I was listening to a lot of music with headphones at the time.

At first, I was coping well because it was quiet and easily maskable, so habituation worked for me.

Then, when I was 25, I experienced another noise trauma. A "friend" blasted loud music in the car, and I caught a cold at the same time. My tinnitus went from being a background noise to a foreground one. I cannot really explain it, but now it is much harder to mask. It has become louder and more invasive than before. I went to an ENT, but they told me I had no hearing loss. There was a little bit of fluid in my ear, but that was it.

Now, at 31, I have started developing mild hyperacusis, and my tinnitus has become multi tonal. This has made me paranoid about every sound. I spend hours Googling things like "slamming door decibels" to check whether everyday noises could be causing damage. I feel like every loud sound adds to my tinnitus, making it worse.

I am scared to leave my apartment and cannot even enjoy things I used to love because I constantly hear this awful sound. Sometimes, I think about all the really loud events I have experienced and feel like my body is broken, like it will never recover from these noises.

I am in great distress. I fear death more than anything, yet at the same time, I feel like it would be the only way to finally experience silence. I have never had these thoughts before, and they scare me. My girlfriend is scared too.

Tinnitus is so complex. It feels like we would need alien technology to cure it, and that thought terrifies me.

The only thing that gives me a few minutes of relief is a hot shower because it drowns out the sound.

Other symptoms I experience:
  • Muffled ears almost all the time, especially at night
  • Jaw movement causes little cracks in my ears, sometimes loud
  • A constant stuffy feeling in my nose, but high up near my eyes. I had this as a kid before having my adenoids removed. I am not sure if that is relevant
  • Tension and sensitivity in my teeth, even after getting my wisdom teeth removed. It feels almost the same
  • Occasional hypersensitivity to touch, like my teeth hurting when I touch paper with dry fingers or feeling irritated by clothing on my skin. It seems like my nerves flare up for no reason, and I wonder if it is linked to my tinnitus
  • Moderate or loud sounds sometimes affect my balance
I am probably forgetting some details because there is so much going through my mind.

Thank you so much if you took the time to read this. I really hope there will be a cure or at least some real relief one day.
 

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