Hi everyone,
First I wanna say if this post offends anyone, I'm sorry, it's not my attention, I'm just venting.
I've had tinnitus for 1 month and I posted a few times but I want to say my story and what I think of T and this forum and life with T in general.
I'm 32, I'm married, I got a son and I was living life just fine up until a month ago.
So I'll start off by saying my t was pretty low, a simple fan or tv would mask the noise, not so much anymore, only because I choose not to wear ear plugs, people on here say the minute they go outside they put ear plugs in there ears when they drive in a car when they go to a restaurant when they're just taking a walk, I don't understand what kinda life is that, my thought is that if you have to live in a bubble, cause that's pretty much what it is, then you shouldn't live at all.
My T gets loud, goes low, gets loud, goes low, there's no controlling it if you wear ear plugs or not, if you smoke, drink, eat salt, drink coffee, you really never know what is spiking it, it's all a guessing game so live the best you can if you can.
My ENT says my eustachian tubes are inflamed very bad, that's pretty much what is causing my T but I'm not very hopeful that it will go away, I was hopeful but because of this forum because everything on here is horror especially when I read about people with the same problem I have, yet they've had T for 20 years, but for some stupid reason I'm addicted to this forum like a drug just reading and reading and reading. I believe that this T is hell on earth and nothing less, it's so unpredictable it makes me feel so hopeless, I cry and cry and cry, I feel sorry for myself, for my family and then I get angry that even if I habituate to the noise, I gotta wear ear plugs wherever I go basically and I can't stay in the silence and I can't stay where it's to noisy, so pretty much stay in a bubble with a white noise machine, I tell you now it's not a life, it's hell on earth, and the thought of leaving this life is not far from my thoughts.
My work consist of me driving constantly and this forum pretty much says that the damn bumps in the road and pavement is no good for your ears it spikes t, it's just amazing how it takes away the simplest things in life like going to a movie is a problem, now driving is a problem, the ambulance truck that passes by is a problem.
Last week I went to a bar with friends with no ear plugs because I refuse to live in a bubble and all I can think about is how my friends are drinking and having fun and my thoughts are is my t gonna be louder and stay louder forever after this night, it's depressing.
I'm mad at life, now I could not sleep because yesterday I drove 100 miles and my t has not gone down and seems to get louder every day, so my options are wear ear plugs, and live in a bubble, and stop salt, and don't eat fast foods, and don't smoke, and don't drink, and don't drive too long, and don't go to movies, and don't go to bars and restaurants, and pretty much just stand still with a white noise machine or have t spike constantly and the best part is even if I do just stand still with a white noise machine it still spikes, lol life sucks, your thoughts....?
First I wanna say if this post offends anyone, I'm sorry, it's not my attention, I'm just venting.
I've had tinnitus for 1 month and I posted a few times but I want to say my story and what I think of T and this forum and life with T in general.
I'm 32, I'm married, I got a son and I was living life just fine up until a month ago.
So I'll start off by saying my t was pretty low, a simple fan or tv would mask the noise, not so much anymore, only because I choose not to wear ear plugs, people on here say the minute they go outside they put ear plugs in there ears when they drive in a car when they go to a restaurant when they're just taking a walk, I don't understand what kinda life is that, my thought is that if you have to live in a bubble, cause that's pretty much what it is, then you shouldn't live at all.
My T gets loud, goes low, gets loud, goes low, there's no controlling it if you wear ear plugs or not, if you smoke, drink, eat salt, drink coffee, you really never know what is spiking it, it's all a guessing game so live the best you can if you can.
My ENT says my eustachian tubes are inflamed very bad, that's pretty much what is causing my T but I'm not very hopeful that it will go away, I was hopeful but because of this forum because everything on here is horror especially when I read about people with the same problem I have, yet they've had T for 20 years, but for some stupid reason I'm addicted to this forum like a drug just reading and reading and reading. I believe that this T is hell on earth and nothing less, it's so unpredictable it makes me feel so hopeless, I cry and cry and cry, I feel sorry for myself, for my family and then I get angry that even if I habituate to the noise, I gotta wear ear plugs wherever I go basically and I can't stay in the silence and I can't stay where it's to noisy, so pretty much stay in a bubble with a white noise machine, I tell you now it's not a life, it's hell on earth, and the thought of leaving this life is not far from my thoughts.
My work consist of me driving constantly and this forum pretty much says that the damn bumps in the road and pavement is no good for your ears it spikes t, it's just amazing how it takes away the simplest things in life like going to a movie is a problem, now driving is a problem, the ambulance truck that passes by is a problem.
Last week I went to a bar with friends with no ear plugs because I refuse to live in a bubble and all I can think about is how my friends are drinking and having fun and my thoughts are is my t gonna be louder and stay louder forever after this night, it's depressing.
I'm mad at life, now I could not sleep because yesterday I drove 100 miles and my t has not gone down and seems to get louder every day, so my options are wear ear plugs, and live in a bubble, and stop salt, and don't eat fast foods, and don't smoke, and don't drink, and don't drive too long, and don't go to movies, and don't go to bars and restaurants, and pretty much just stand still with a white noise machine or have t spike constantly and the best part is even if I do just stand still with a white noise machine it still spikes, lol life sucks, your thoughts....?