My Days Are Getting Better

[Jazzer]

There is still no cure for tinnitus, and no treatment to reduce tinnitus noise.

I have a severe and constant form of this condition.
My feelings vary between wishing I was dead, to wishing I could hit on a much better way to cope.

Is it possible to:
'make the best of a (very) bad job?'

My belief is that we have to attempt to reach a stage where we hear our noise, and feel okay with it.
I literally practice this on a daily basis.

I can relax deeply - ask my tummy to take over my breathing - hear my noise - and repeat my mantra.

"I hear it - and I'm okay,
I hear it - and I'm okay...."
I gradually drift away to somewhere peaceful.

I actually practice 'being okay with my noise.'
My days are getting better.....x

Dave x
Jazzer

 

[emmalee]

My days are getting better.....x

Nice to hear this Dave.

 

[Jazzer]

Nice to hear this Dave.

I've been advocating this method for a long time now Ems - but I don't know if anybody else has tried it successfully?

 

[emmalee]

I've been advocating this method for a long time now Ems - but I don't know if anybody else has tried it successfully?

I have been doing your "soft jaw technique" and it works beautifully. My meditation of choice is yoga, it works wonders, thankfully.

 

[Jazzer]

I have been doing your "soft jaw technique" and it works it works beautifully. My meditation of choice is yoga, it works wonders, thankfully.

I'm so pleased Ems.
The soft mouth, hanging jaw technique was specifically the brain child of my psychotherapist from 25 years ago, so I mustn't take the credit, but it is a great help towards relaxation and meditation isn't it?
Take care,
Dave x

 

[Starthrower]

I've been advocating this method for a long time now Ems - but I don't know if anybody else has tried it successfully?

Hugs @Jazzer...me me me too....

I have learned though - this is something one has to find out and experience - rather than people harping on them about it.

So I listen or read everyone's experiences knowing one day they will understand. No one could have gotten that message to me back in 2002 and sometimes we just need to rant or write or cry or complain and stuff and have someone listen without judgement or what we should be "doing".

So glad you have experienced better days.

I still have my setbacks and it sucks but...oh well.

 

[emmalee]

I'm so pleased Ems.
The soft mouth, hanging jaw technique was specifically the brain child of my psychotherapist from 25 years ago, so I mustn't take the credit, but it is a great help towards relaxation and meditation isn't it?
Take care,
Dave x

It really is a great help. Thanks again for sharing it.

I use the 4, 7, 8 breathing technique, also. The yoga instructor I follow brought it to my attention. What you do is breath in for the count of 4, hold for the count of 7 and then release for the count of 8. I do this several times in a row if I am feeling particularly stressed.

Meditation and relaxation techniques can be very helpful when dealing with tinnitus. It is not a cure, but it can help you to de-stress. One only has to commit to giving it a go.

 

[Jazzer]

I still have my setbacks and it sucks but...oh well.

Me too Star - I'm not home and dry,
but I am better....x

 

[billie48]

"I hear it - and I'm okay,
I hear it - and I'm okay...."
I gradually drift away to somewhere peaceful.

Glad to hear that you are feeling better, Jazzer. You may already know it, this method of saying to self 'I hear it. I....' is the backbone of the technique shared by IWLM in his most-read success story 'Back to Silence'. To me, this is a form of mindfulness where one acknowledges a feeling/sensation with no negative and emotional response while trying to show acceptance or openness to the sensation/feeling. This tends to create a buffer between the unpleasant sensation and the brain, allowing the latter to gradually learn to cope with it.

 

[Jazzer]

Glad to hear that you are feeling better, Jazzer. You may already know it, this method of saying to self 'I hear it. I....' is the backbone of the technique shared by IWLM in his most-read success story 'Back to Silence'. To me, this is a form of mindfulness where one acknowledges a feeling/sensation with no negative and emotional response while trying to show acceptance or openness to the sensation/feeling. This tends to create a buffer between the unpleasant sensation and the brain, allowing the latter to gradually learn to cope with it.

Hi Billie.
I tried the 'Back to Silence' method but I couldn't make it work for me.
(Hearing it - then writing down whatever the response is.)
There are similarities but also differences.

My method depends on achieving peace/comfort first - every time - by meditation - then using the mantra to reinforce the feeling I have managed to achieve.

I had to prove to myself that peace/comfort was actually achievable first - not just a random response.

I feel lucky to have hit on something that makes a difference for me.

(Incidentally - I always felt that the BTS method was misnamed.
For me - meditational methods give me greater peace, but not silence.
But then 'concepts' have to be specifically right on target if they are going to work for you.
All of this just my views, of course.)

 

[billie48]

My method depends on achieving peace/comfort first - every time - by meditation - then using the mantra to reinforce the feeling I have managed to achieve.

Great for you Jazzer. I am familiar with your approach. I think it is a forum of mindfulness meditation where one learns to relax and achieve a state of peaceful, relax state first and then the practitioner brings awareness into an unpleasant feeling/sensation, such as an anxious feeling, while maintaining a non-judgemental, embracing attitude with openness. Speaking to self with positive affirmation will then help the brain to realize that it is ok to co-exist with that unpleasant sensation. I have heard people use this mindfulness meditation to help them cope with chronic conditions, such as pain, anxiety, panic attacks, etc. In the end, I think the brain slowly realize that it can co-exist with the feeling/sensation to the point that the pre-frontal cortex takes over from the amygdala in processing the sensation, and then it no longer functions in the fight or flight mode. Then we can begin to feel more normal again and healing can begin, if slowly. My humble 2 cents.

 

[Jazzer]

Great for you Jazzer. I am familiar with your approach. I think it is a forum of mindfulness meditation where one learns to relax and achieve a state of peaceful, relax state first and then the practitioner brings awareness into an unpleasant feeling/sensation, such as an anxious feeling, while maintaining a non-judgemental, embracing attitude with openness. Speaking to self with positive affirmation will then help the brain to realize that it is ok to co-exist with that unpleasant sensation. I have heard people use this mindfulness meditation to help them cope with chronic conditions, such as pain, anxiety, panic attacks, etc. In the end, I think the brain slowly realize that it can co-exist with the feeling/sensation to the point that the pre-frontal cortex takes over from the amygdala in processing the sensation, and then it no longer functions in the fight or flight mode. Then we can begin to feel more normal again and healing can begin, if slowly. My humble 2 cents.

Billie - I have to tell you - that was beautifully put, and exactly right.
You have sussed out perfectly where I am coming from.
I weighed and balanced every word you wrote
- and you have it dead right.
Thank you my friend - thank you for taking the trouble.
Dave x
Jazzer

 

[emmalee]

My humble 2 cents.

Your humble "2 cents" is priceless, billie. Thank-you for your thoughts.

 

[TLion]

Jazzer, i would be interested if you protect yourself from everyday noises like driving in a car on the highway etc. Or going to the restaurants. I'm still not sure about this topic.

 

[Jazzer]

Jazzer, i would be interested if you protect yourself from everyday noises like driving in a car on the highway etc. Or going to the restaurants. I'm still not sure about this topic.

TL - I protect whenever the ambient noise bothers me.
My tinnitus is SSNHL induced.
Jazz bands that consistently played too loud.
Noise did the damage - more loud noise WILL do more damage.
As far as I am concerned, the so called damage from over protecting idea, is a myth.
I always have plugs in my shirt pocket when out and about.
I rarely put them in for normal circumstances.
But in restaurants I always use them, if kids are shrieking in supermarkets yes, the ferocious air system hand driers in toilets, yes, when I am vacuuming, yes.
Not necessary for me in normal driving conditions.
I will leave the kitchen when my wife uses a blender etc...
One well meaning gent on the forum said that protecting against hand driers was ridiculous.
He clearly does not have my level of Tinnitus, or my level of discomfort.
I would strongly advise you to protect if you are experiencing discomfort or anxiety.
Don't allow anybody else to determine 'when.'
They do not have your lug'oles, or your Tinnitus.
ie - they are guessing, while you take the risk.
All of the above is just my opinion of course.
Best wishes
Dave x
Jazzer

PS - my caution is pretty much in line with the
@Bill Bauer School of thought.

 

[TuxedoCat]

@Jazzer

Hi Jazzer, I read in one of your posts that you have a twin brother. Are you identical twins and does he have ear troubles as well? Just curious about genetics vs environmental factors. Many thanks, TC

 

[Jazzer]

Hi TC
- no, we are non-identical twins
known as dizygotic or fraternal.
He has no hearing problems whatsoever.
With this photograph we won a baby show.

Ever since then, of course, it's been all down hill.

 

[TuxedoCat]

Hi TC
- no, we are non-identical twins
known as dizygotic or fraternal.
He has no hearing problems whatsoever.
With this photograph we won a baby show.

OMG, Two times the cuteness!

 

[Jazzer]

OMG, Two times the cuteness!

TC - I love you, as you know,
but you're a smooth talker......haha,
Dave x

 

[TuxedoCat]

TC - I love you, as you know,
but you're a smooth talker......haha,
Dave x

What???? You don't think you're cute? Come on, babies are major cuteness. Although, there is a hint in the picture that the two of you might have different personalities. Had you not identified yourself, I think I may have been able to pick you out based on the pictures of you as an adult.

Anyway if you want me to be serious then here goes - the reason I asked about you and your twin is that over on the ATA Facebook page they've posted a study done in Sweden where they looked at the incidence of tinnitus in adopted children, in their adoptive parents and their biological parents.

This is from the ATA's Facebook page -
"The findings (of the study) suggest that genetic factors are associated with the familial clustering of clinically significant tinnitus with no shared-environment association, revealing that the transition from negligible to severe tinnitus may be associated with genetic factors." https://jamanetwork.com/…/jamaotolaryng…/fullarticle/2721030

The idea that there may be a genetic component is not new, so the study adds to the evidence. However, if you were an identical twin and only you had tinnitus I would have been left with the feeling that environmental factors, such as you being a musician, may still play a large role. (I've also assumed your brother was not a musician as an adult.)

Take care, TC

 

[Digital Doc]

TL - I protect whenever the ambient noise bothers me.
My tinnitus is SSNHL induced.
Jazz bands that consistently played too loud.
Noise did the damage - more loud noise WILL do more damage.
As far as I am concerned, the so called damage from over protecting idea, is a myth.
I always have plugs in my shirt pocket when out and about.
I rarely put them in for normal circumstances.
But in restaurants I always use them, if kids are shrieking in supermarkets yes, the ferocious air system hand driers in toilets, yes, when I am vacuuming, yes.
Not necessary for me in normal driving conditions.
I will leave the kitchen when my wife uses a blender etc...
One well meaning gent on the forum said that protecting against hand driers was ridiculous.
He clearly does not have my level of Tinnitus, or my level of discomfort.
I would strongly advise you to protect if you are experiencing discomfort or anxiety.
Don't allow anybody else to determine 'when.'
They do not have your lug'oles, or your Tinnitus.
ie - they are guessing, while you take the risk.
All of the above is just my opinion of course.
Best wishes
Dave x
Jazzer

PS - my caution is pretty much in line with the
@Bill Bauer School of thought.

Well said, and I follow a similar plan.

Definitely yes for the vacuum, and the paper shredder, and not for driving. I bring them to supermarkets and restaurants, but only use them if it is loud at this point.

 

[Jazzer]

. (I've also assumed your brother was not a musician as an adult.)

Correct TC.
We were in a Salvation Army band from age 10 to age 18.
I had heard the golden tones of Louis Armstrong by this time, and needed to trade my hymn tune book for a jazz repertoire.
We both left the Sall Ann in 1959, me to learn everything I needed to know to be a pro jazz trombonist.
Mick never played again but started learning his craft as a Motor Racing photographer.
He became the best.
(Look him up on Google and Amazon.)
I believe he took this photo in 1960.

 

[Jazzer]

"I hear it - and I'm okay,
I hear it - and I'm okay...."
I gradually drift away to somewhere peaceful.

I have severe tinnitus etc....
I know that I cannot cure it, or get rid of it.
Deciding to ignore it simply does not work for me.
So what else if anything can I try?

If I do nothing, simply brood on my misfortune, things quickly go from bad to worse.
If I start to contemplate other desperate measures, I experience desolation.
If I continuously post on this aspect is there any possibility that I might make other severe sufferers feel even worse, and drag them down along with me?

I sometimes feel very angry about what has happened to me.
I lost my entire way of life 'FFS!'
I very nearly lost everything.
But where will 'living angry' get me?
Who can I get angry with?
Who do I get in touch with?
The creator I suppose, for his/her wretchedly inadequate hearing system deficit.
We could be forgiven for thinking he/she should have made a much better job of it.
Attention to detail etc......

Is there a better way of living with Tinnitus.
Is peaceful co-existence a possibility.
I am always experimenting with meditational aspects.
I know that some members will see this very thought as 'mumbo-jumbo-crap!' - and I actually don't blame them.
Acceptance is a compromise after all.
But the simple method that I mentioned above is tending to help me folks.

Just meditation - a mantra - auto suggestion, etc..
........but if it works.......?

 

[Lane]

I am always experimenting with meditational aspects. ...... Just meditation - a mantra - auto suggestion, etc..

In case you're interested, I've learned that the HU mantra helps me "transmute" my "sense" of tinnitus to a degree, making it a bit more tolerable. I find it especially helpful when I sometimes wake up in the night, and notice my "system" is heading into a panic mode, as the tinnitus "zeroes in" on me. There's times at night when by just singing this mantra silently within myself, I can get that "zeroing in" sensation to stop within seconds, and I can then get back to sleep. Doesn't work everytime, but I'd say about 75%+.

I also turn on a live recording of it before going to bed at a very low volume, which I've also found helpful. They make references to God and love in these videos I'm linking to, but if that doesn't resonate with you, then just disregard it. Personal beliefs most likey wouldn't affect whether it works for a person or not. Also, I've been using this mantra for many years, so I don't know whether any transmuting effect I enjoy would be as helpful for others, or work as quickly. But it might! -- All the Best...

 

[Jazzer]

In case you're interested, I've learned that the HU mantra helps me "transmute" my "sense" of tinnitus to a degree, making it a bit more tolerable. I find it especially helpful when I sometimes wake up in the night, and notice my "system" is heading into a panic mode, as the tinnitus "zeroes in" on me. There's times at night when by just singing this mantra silently within myself, I can get that "zeroing in" sensation to stop within seconds, and I can then get back to sleep. Doesn't work everytime, but I'd say about 75%+.

I also turn on a live recording of it before going to bed at a very low volume, which I've also found helpful. They make references to God and love in these videos I'm linking to, but if that doesn't resonate with you, then just disregard it. Personal beliefs most likey wouldn't affect whether it works for a person or not. Also, I've been using this mantra for many years, so I don't know whether any transmuting effect I enjoy would be as helpful for others, or work as quickly. But it might! -- All the Best...

Thank you very much Lane.
Exactly the kind of thing that I am interested in.
I do not have a faith.
Some of my good friends, who are believers, tell me that they have a personal relationship with the living God.
Unfortunately I have never found a point of contact.

I think of meditation as being an attempt to contact my deepest self.
I tend to feel that various mantras would take me there.

I will certainly give this a go.
Thanks again Lane.
Dave x

 

[TuxedoCat]

I believe he took this photo in 1960.

Wow, that's truly life in the fast lane. I wonder if the guy made it or did Mick catch the driver's last breath before he went to the big raceway in the sky? -TC

 

[Jazzer]

Hi @TuxedoCat
The driver was Jim Leighton - at Druids Bend at Brands Hatch.
His front wheel had run up over the rear wheel of the car in front, which flipped him.
Mick told me that drivers were not strapped in in those days.
He was thrown out on the track immediately after this crash.
The crowd on Druids all stood up and gasped as he writhed on the track.
The ambulance took him away.
A couple of hours after the prang an announcement was made over the tannoy.
"Ladies and gentlemen - Jim is alright.
Multiple bruises - torn ligaments but no broken bones."
Being taken on a single lens reflex camera, Mick knew he had taken it at exactly the right moment because as the shutter goes across, the last image you see through the viewfinder is the picture, before it blacks out.
Mick got Brian, his older brother, to take him up to London to the newspaper offices, on the back of a motor scooter, so it could come out on the front page and centre spread in the early editions the next morning.
It has been printed all round the world several times.
Not bad for a rookie seventeen year old.