Hi,
I know what it's like to have debilitating tinnitus, and today, it's 99% gone. It's not the first thought I have when I wake up in the morning. My stomach no longer churns when I have the 'eeeee' sound. Although my anxiety from getting tinnitus may always be with me, I know I have survived. And it does get better despite my consuming thoughts. I know I should have written my success story earlier, so better late than never.
May 2014. I remember my ear making a popping noise in the middle of Panera Bread, and then the 'eeeee'. I assumed it would just go away the next day. It didn't. It just got LOUDER. I woke up and I had extreme pressure in my head, and the room was spinning, accompanying an ever so loud 'eeeeee' sound. I could hear the sound over everything, even the shower. My body went into flight or fight mood, I begged to be committed. That's how bad it got for the year. I just remember the pain and sadness I was in, and my family who just comforted me in any way they could.
I went to several ENTS, who told me to live with it, my mother shouted back at the doctor. I was 23 at the time and I just finished college, starting my new career. I told them how I was at a music festival a week before, I assumed it was an acoustic trauma and starting blaming myself. Oh, I hated myself so much. Why why why did I have to go that EDM festival?! Why did I stand close to the stage?! The blame set in, and I fell into a deep depression. I didn't eat. I cried on the way to work and back, no one could empathize with me. I felt so alone. I stopped going out and isolated myself, and of course, anything to do with music. The thing I loved the most.
Then, one particularly bad day, I went to my GP, and she prescribed me prednisone. I woke up in the middle of the night and heard silence for the first time in 8 months. I cried of bliss. Once the steroids were out of my system, the 'eeeee' came back with a vengance. However, this got me thinking, this could be an inflammation issue.
My jaw has always clicked after a bad wisdom removal, could this be a TMJD problem? You must be your own advocate for your health, unfortunately, if the answer is not in a doctor's textbook, they can't help you. Many doctors dismissed me until one clever ENT touched my jaw, he said, you may have a jaw problem, not an ear problem. I went to a dentist and they confirmed my jaw was misaligned. I religiously wore a splint for 6 months, and low and behold, my jaw stopped clicking and clenching. The 'eeeeee' sound was finally dissipating after 2 years. Yes, 2 years!!! Oh, and my face wasn't so swollen anymore.
I started seeing a chiropractor as well, my back and neck were extremely swollen. I started getting allergy shots, this helped too. In my brain, I was doing everything I could to eliminate the inflammation. I went to a massage therapist to do neuromuscular therapy on my jaw, it worked wonders, that even my ENT asked for his information so he could help his patients with tinnitus.
Then, last year, I can't remember the date, but I woke up in silence. It took 4 years.... 4 years for the inflammation to die down. I live a normal life, I go to bars and movies and drink. I go to concerts with earplugs and I stand in the back (all my friends understand that I need to be far away). I saw Radiohead. My life isn't on hold anymore.
I never ever thought it would get better, and it did.
<3
Kara