My Story — Some Positivity for You

[Shem]

Just a small note to pass on some positivity - I'm fairly new to tinnitus as well, I've had it for 2 months now following sudden unexplained severe hearing loss in one ear. Basically woke up one morning with a very loud ringing and no hearing in one ear. Like most of you, I was very distraught at first, needed meds and masking to sleep. The ringing was VERY loud, never stopped. I was using masking all the time, just to function at work. I was seeing an ENT, trying to regain hearing with some success, but still do not have functional hearing in the one ear. I was told "you will get used to it", and I would think to myself that there is absolutely no way I could ever get used to this blaring ringing in my ear and that these people just don't understand the severity.

So - after a few months, things are MUCH better. Sorry to say, the tinnitus is the same, but it does not bother me nearly as much. I don't think about it much at all - still bothersome when I go from a place with background noise to a silent setting, but it's no longer the anxiety panic-inducing reaction that I had at the beginning. It can be annoying, but that's about it. I now sleep soundly at night with no masking or drugs, despite the ringing. Keep in mind, when this first began, I could not even imagine being able to function with the Tinnitus.

So what changed? It's a good question that I've been thinking about.

1. Realizing it can't hurt you. Physically, tinnitus cannot hurt you. You need to drill that into your head. The "harm" is all coming from within, and completely under your control.

2. Acceptance. Accept that this is your new normal. Sure, it may get better at some point - it does for many people, there might be a miracle drug at some point, but for now at least, this is where you are at. Things will probably not drastically improve anytime soon. I do not have any expectation that I will get better, and I'm ok with that. If I'm wrong - fantastic, but for me at least, acceptance is liberating. You can stop obsessing over what drugs, research, etc etc are coming.

3. Fake it till you make it. Keep doing what you normally do. Stay busy. Continue to do what you do, even if it's a struggle at the beginning, and feels like you are playing a part. Keep doing it. The busier you are, the less you will think about your tinnitus. Over a little bit of time, you will see that one day, you are no longer just "acting" fine, but actually feeling fine too.

4. Don't obsessively browse these forums. Tinnitus seems to get worse the more attention you give it. Set a limit, maybe 1 visit per day. Also, it's important to keep in mind that there is selection bias going on here. The people who end up here (including myself, and you if you are reading this) are those that have chronic or severe tinnitus, but I also believe that many who find relief simply vanish, while those that do not, remain. You are getting the filtered stories of those that have not found relief, but not nearly as many from those who find relief.

5. Steer clear of medications and masking if possible. This worked for me - but each person needs to decide what works for them. During the first couple of weeks I occasionally took some meds to help me sleep, but I didn't feel like it was a viable long term solution, so I tried to limit intake. Also during the first few weeks, I relied heavily on masking, both at night and during the day. It got to the point where I would panic if I had to leave my office or go anywhere where I would not be able to apply masking. That also was not a viable long term solution, so I decided to cut out the masking. The first couple of days was rough, but after that it got much easier. I believe that cutting out masking dramatically sped up the habituation process. I'm not saying you have to sit around in complete silence, I play music at a low volume in my office sometimes, but I avoid the white noise type masking where I can't hear the ringing.

6. Don't freak out when there is a spike. It's almost certainly transient. I know when I am exposed to sustained loud noise, my tinnitus may spike for a couple of days. No big deal. It can't hurt me (rule #1), but it certainly can be annoying.

So that's pretty much it. I know it's hard, and easy to fall into a pattern of despair, but resist that. Things WILL get better, whether or not your tinnitus decreases. Hopefully your tinnitus vanishes, but even if it does not, life goes on, it can't hurt you. You'll be fine.

-Shem

 

[ajith]

It's absolutely what Iam feeling now.

 

[fishbone]

Just a small note to pass on some positivity - I'm fairly new to tinnitus as well, I've had it for 2 months now following sudden unexplained severe hearing loss in one ear. Basically woke up one morning with a very loud ringing and no hearing in one ear. Like most of you, I was very distraught at first, needed meds and masking to sleep. The ringing was VERY loud, never stopped. I was using masking all the time, just to function at work. I was seeing an ENT, trying to regain hearing with some success, but still do not have functional hearing in the one ear. I was told "you will get used to it", and I would think to myself that there is absolutely no way I could ever get used to this blaring ringing in my ear and that these people just don't understand the severity.

So - after a few months, things are MUCH better. Sorry to say, the tinnitus is the same, but it does not bother me nearly as much. I don't think about it much at all - still bothersome when I go from a place with background noise to a silent setting, but it's no longer the anxiety panic-inducing reaction that I had at the beginning. It can be annoying, but that's about it. I now sleep soundly at night with no masking or drugs, despite the ringing. Keep in mind, when this first began, I could not even imagine being able to function with the Tinnitus.

So what changed? It's a good question that I've been thinking about.

1. Realizing it can't hurt you. Physically, tinnitus cannot hurt you. You need to drill that into your head. The "harm" is all coming from within, and completely under your control.

2. Acceptance. Accept that this is your new normal. Sure, it may get better at some point - it does for many people, there might be a miracle drug at some point, but for now at least, this is where you are at. Things will probably not drastically improve anytime soon. I do not have any expectation that I will get better, and I'm ok with that. If I'm wrong - fantastic, but for me at least, acceptance is liberating. You can stop obsessing over what drugs, research, etc etc are coming.

3. Fake it till you make it. Keep doing what you normally do. Stay busy. Continue to do what you do, even if it's a struggle at the beginning, and feels like you are playing a part. Keep doing it. The busier you are, the less you will think about your tinnitus. Over a little bit of time, you will see that one day, you are no longer just "acting" fine, but actually feeling fine too.

4. Don't obsessively browse these forums. Tinnitus seems to get worse the more attention you give it. Set a limit, maybe 1 visit per day. Also, it's important to keep in mind that there is selection bias going on here. The people who end up here (including myself, and you if you are reading this) are those that have chronic or severe tinnitus, but I also believe that many who find relief simply vanish, while those that do not, remain. You are getting the filtered stories of those that have not found relief, but not nearly as many from those who find relief.

5. Steer clear of medications and masking if possible. This worked for me - but each person needs to decide what works for them. During the first couple of weeks I occasionally took some meds to help me sleep, but I didn't feel like it was a viable long term solution, so I tried to limit intake. Also during the first few weeks, I relied heavily on masking, both at night and during the day. It got to the point where I would panic if I had to leave my office or go anywhere where I would not be able to apply masking. That also was not a viable long term solution, so I decided to cut out the masking. The first couple of days was rough, but after that it got much easier. I believe that cutting out masking dramatically sped up the habituation process. I'm not saying you have to sit around in complete silence, I play music at a low volume in my office sometimes, but I avoid the white noise type masking where I can't hear the ringing.

6. Don't freak out when there is a spike. It's almost certainly transient. I know when I am exposed to sustained loud noise, my tinnitus may spike for a couple of days. No big deal. It can't hurt me (rule #1), but it certainly can be annoying.

So that's pretty much it. I know it's hard, and easy to fall into a pattern of despair, but resist that. Things WILL get better, whether or not your tinnitus decreases. Hopefully your tinnitus vanishes, but even if it does not, life goes on, it can't hurt you. You'll be fine.

-Shem

You make some valid points. Masking can be quite helpful, for those that have LOUD/intrusive tinnitus. For some masking is a must because, their tinnitus is just way too strong and it is needed. You seem to be on the right track, good job

 

[Ayung]

Thank you for your advice

 

[Why?]

This is my perception on forums. I appreciate reading what others are going through. What works & doesn't work for them. What their level of anxiety is & what they fear the most when their anxiety is peaking. I believe forums are the place to state negative emotions, much like crying on a loved one's shoulder. Finding out someone is feeling what you're feeling, suffering like you're suffering. Someone cares enough to stand up & say they are @ the edge of a cliff - asking does anyone care? Then those forum members who do care reach out & touch your heart. My opinion my feelings. My gratitude - thank you for caring about all of us who are suffering @ the cliff's edge

 

[Shem]

You make some valid points. Masking can be quite helpful, for those that have LOUD/intrusive tinnitus. For some masking is a must because, their tinnitus is just way too strong and it is needed.

Thanks for the comment, and I agree 100%. Everybody has to figure out what works or them. I'm sure some people have it way worse than me. For myself, masking gave me immediate relief, but there was a significant rebound effect as soon as I removed the masking. As soon as the background noise was gone, the tinnitus would hit me like a freight train, to the point where I would get anxious if I knew I was going to be in a situation where I would not be able to mask (ie leaving my office, meetings, etc). I spent a few really rough days without masking, but over a week or so it got much easier, to the point now, several months later, where I really don't need it.

But as you say, that's my experience. Others certainly may have a different path.

 

[Thereisnogod]

Thanks for your post. However, I find it rather annoying when people say with such certainty that it WILL get better (saying it CAN get better makes more sense to me). Maybe it did for YOU. For some people it WON'T get better and perhaps even worse. I don't get the fact people keep fixating on ''tinnitus isn't harmfull'' as something positive. I know it is not harmfull (and I doubt most people on here are feeling the way they do because think it might be harmfull) and in fact I find that more frustrating because that basically means it doesn't kill you, thus torturing you for the rest of your life without an end. Lastly, my apologies for being negative but it's just the way I feel about the things you've mentioned. Hopefully your post will have a better impact on others. Peace.

 

[Shem]

You make some fair points. I probably should have framed it more in terms of what worked "for me" as oppose to framing it like I did. Understand that my intentions are in the right place. When I wrote it, I knew what was working for me, and was simply trying to share that with others who might find it helpful and I think the post is probably more suited to those for whom Tinnitus is a new phenomenon. For myself, I knew from the beginning (as do most, as you say) it was not physically harmful, but drilling that mantra into my head and really taking it to heart helped reduce my anxiety, which was very high at the time.

Also understand, the tinnitus has not improved over time - what has changed is how I deal with it. I'm not saying that anybody's tinnitus will improve. In fact, (again, for me), accepting that it won't improve and trying to move forward from that point made a big difference. It's an internal battle, and in that sense, I do think it can improve for everybody - whether it be a similar path to mine, or something different that works for them.

 

[anusha]

I totally agree with number 4. I have heard so many success stories of tinnitus gone in real life than on internet. Especially on the forums. If i search on internet there is 1/10 success stories. My neighbor found out for me the 4 scenarios of ear drum perforation and its closed and ringing stopped for everyone. I don't read that on internet more. I think who have healed should remember and write but people forget once its healed and never write.

 

[emmalee]

Thank-you for this post @Shem, I feel much better having just read it. I realize it was written in December, 2017, however I am very new here and I am seeking out as many positive posts as I can.

 

[TinA#7oct]

Shem, A great post detailing your pathway to recovery. Thank you for sharing hope!

Right at that waking moment, when consciousness slowly emerges from sleep
There can be a wisp of silence........... before tinnitus sounds it's first loud beat.

Shem, Thankyou again! TinA#7oct

 

[dpdx]

Just a small note to pass on some positivity - I'm fairly new to tinnitus as well, I've had it for 2 months now following sudden unexplained severe hearing loss in one ear. Basically woke up one morning with a very loud ringing and no hearing in one ear. Like most of you, I was very distraught at first, needed meds and masking to sleep. The ringing was VERY loud, never stopped. I was using masking all the time, just to function at work. I was seeing an ENT, trying to regain hearing with some success, but still do not have functional hearing in the one ear. I was told "you will get used to it", and I would think to myself that there is absolutely no way I could ever get used to this blaring ringing in my ear and that these people just don't understand the severity.

So - after a few months, things are MUCH better. Sorry to say, the tinnitus is the same, but it does not bother me nearly as much. I don't think about it much at all - still bothersome when I go from a place with background noise to a silent setting, but it's no longer the anxiety panic-inducing reaction that I had at the beginning. It can be annoying, but that's about it. I now sleep soundly at night with no masking or drugs, despite the ringing. Keep in mind, when this first began, I could not even imagine being able to function with the Tinnitus.

So what changed? It's a good question that I've been thinking about.

1. Realizing it can't hurt you. Physically, tinnitus cannot hurt you. You need to drill that into your head. The "harm" is all coming from within, and completely under your control.

2. Acceptance. Accept that this is your new normal. Sure, it may get better at some point - it does for many people, there might be a miracle drug at some point, but for now at least, this is where you are at. Things will probably not drastically improve anytime soon. I do not have any expectation that I will get better, and I'm ok with that. If I'm wrong - fantastic, but for me at least, acceptance is liberating. You can stop obsessing over what drugs, research, etc etc are coming.

3. Fake it till you make it. Keep doing what you normally do. Stay busy. Continue to do what you do, even if it's a struggle at the beginning, and feels like you are playing a part. Keep doing it. The busier you are, the less you will think about your tinnitus. Over a little bit of time, you will see that one day, you are no longer just "acting" fine, but actually feeling fine too.

4. Don't obsessively browse these forums. Tinnitus seems to get worse the more attention you give it. Set a limit, maybe 1 visit per day. Also, it's important to keep in mind that there is selection bias going on here. The people who end up here (including myself, and you if you are reading this) are those that have chronic or severe tinnitus, but I also believe that many who find relief simply vanish, while those that do not, remain. You are getting the filtered stories of those that have not found relief, but not nearly as many from those who find relief.

5. Steer clear of medications and masking if possible. This worked for me - but each person needs to decide what works for them. During the first couple of weeks I occasionally took some meds to help me sleep, but I didn't feel like it was a viable long term solution, so I tried to limit intake. Also during the first few weeks, I relied heavily on masking, both at night and during the day. It got to the point where I would panic if I had to leave my office or go anywhere where I would not be able to apply masking. That also was not a viable long term solution, so I decided to cut out the masking. The first couple of days was rough, but after that it got much easier. I believe that cutting out masking dramatically sped up the habituation process. I'm not saying you have to sit around in complete silence, I play music at a low volume in my office sometimes, but I avoid the white noise type masking where I can't hear the ringing.

6. Don't freak out when there is a spike. It's almost certainly transient. I know when I am exposed to sustained loud noise, my tinnitus may spike for a couple of days. No big deal. It can't hurt me (rule #1), but it certainly can be annoying.

So that's pretty much it. I know it's hard, and easy to fall into a pattern of despair, but resist that. Things WILL get better, whether or not your tinnitus decreases. Hopefully your tinnitus vanishes, but even if it does not, life goes on, it can't hurt you. You'll be fine.

-Shem

Sorry but my loud/severe/intrusive tinnituts and severe hyperacusis is bad, it brings me harm as I cant sleep, focus, concentrate. I Cant hold a job no more or do any menial tasks, sometimes typing up on laptop is hard for me how loud tinnitus can be.