Dear all,
I would like to share my whole story, in the hope to get some support, that maybe someone can relate and to warn others in their early days of noise induced tinnitus, if they might read it.
I am 32 years old, male, from Germany, I have always loved loud music, was going to concerts, used headphones loudly, played music in the car loudly … without giving a second thought to my hearing, as it always went well …
I developed tinnitus after an indoor concert about 10 years ago. First, it was a bit distracting, but it went down very quickly to a level where I would only hear it in silent situations – and even then it was quiet. It did not bother me at all – and so again, I did not give it a second thought and continued with the loud music.
That was until 4 months ago. I have been to another indoor concert. It was a concert of Limp Bizkit, a Band I always wanted to see since I was a kid … now it "finally" happened. Little did I know, it would change my life for the worst…
I went with my old school friends, so the retro feeling was perfect. It has been an amazing evening, we had a lot of fun. I just finished my exam and engaged with my GF, I was so happy that I could celebrate it this way. I was enjoying the time so much that I did not think about ear protection … even though I knew an indoor concert already gave me T the last time, and there I was a lot younger.
From this evening on, everything spiraled down very quickly into negativity.
So after this concert I got loud Tinnitus, very high pitched ringing in the middle oft he head. ENT hearing test showed a 40 dB dip at 4 kHz. I took meds (cortisone pills and infusions) which did not help. I got very depressed and thought my life was over. I went to HBOT which also did not help … but somehow, after 3 months, I noticed a difference. I had a problem in the family coming up which distracted me from my tinnitus thoughts. It felt like the tinnitus related anxiety was exchanged by the family stress anxiety … I was still feeling bad, but tinnitus was not an issue in this time. I do not know if you can call that habituation, maybe it would have stayed that way … or maybe not.
But then I did something really stupid. Much more stupid than all the stuff before. A friend invited me over, he got a new car. We were driving in it, it had a big car hifi stereo installed. He wanted to show me how good it was. Since I thought I habituated and felt well again, and since I got earplugs with me which I then inserted, I said OK, but just for a short time please. He cranked it up and the base was massive … I do not know why I did not ask him to put it down or why I did not leave the car … or why I just said NO … I just can't explain why this happened. Seems like it was pure stupidity then ….
Instantly, my ears felt full and my tinnitus was back like before... no wonder this unhabituated me. Of course I fell in a deep, dark hole. I went to HBOT again just to feel a little more save and also did a hearing test at the ENT. It did not show any damage like before … at that point I still thought, well that's good, seems like nothing happened. Even the hearing damage from the concert healed, as it seemed.
After some days, I developed a second tone. It sounds like having a cricket placed in the right ear. It is intermittent, sometimes it is chirping gently, sometimes it sounds like the crickets are on crack. Loudness and duration of the sound do also vary.
Of course, this sound scared me a lot, but I adjusted the best I could. I developed a mild hyperacusis, but I did not feel the urge to protect against everyday to moderate sounds. I did not yet discover Tinnitus Talk at that time.
Which led me to my next mistake. I had a professional cleaning at the dentist. I knew it could get loud, so I brought my earplugs. I put them in, the dentist did ultrasonic cleaning. I asked him in advance if it is loud, and he said, it's ok, and it won't be long. I trusted him ….
I do not know what the experience would have been like without earplugs, but I felt like the occlusion effect ramped up the volume massively … I was left with a spike and a new white-noise tone that appears in my right ear when I hear certain frequencies, like fans or hair driers. I was so desperate, so the ENT did a hearing test again …. And again no damaged shown on that. I said there must be something to it as noise always makes it worse … so he said we will check the inner ear. Unfortunately I did not know what the tympanometry does to your ears … so I did an OAE test (harmless) and the tympanometry … I thought it is that loud because I have hyperacusis … I trusted the ENT as he knew I had acoustic trauma and would not do a procedure that even harms me more … but when I checked what this test is all about (95 dB right in your ear with headphones), I knew I was screwed. Tinnitus spiked and changed again. Since then, I am having 5 different tones, coming and going, 3 of them 24/7, two intermittent ones, and regularly I get little spikes for a few minutes with new random high pitch squeaks. It feels like every time I listen, I hear something different in my ears. My hyperacusis got worse, certain sounds cause TTTS and I developed phonophobia, plugging my ears all day since moderate noises already caused spikes in the last weeks.
I do not know where this is going … I am isolating myself in the fear of sound, if I try to go "unplugged" my tinnitus spikes and I get massive anxiety attacks for days, I am afraid of wax buildup because I use plugs everyday … I am afraid to not be able to ever habituate to this concert in my head as there is always something new and scary … everyday it get's harder to get up and go to work … I am not smiling anymore and people around me are noticing it … yet noone can understand what I am going through … I feel my relationship is endangered and everything is just getting worse and worse ….
Anyone who had a similar experience with multiple noise exposures in a short time? Is there any hope?
Anyone who can relate and has some advise for me, maybe?
Those who plug their ears all the time: how do you get your wax out safely?
Where do you get you extended audiograms? Here in Germany, noone knows about those … I just would like to know what damage I have done
This whole situation is eating me alive and I feel so damn guilty …. It feels like having lost everything in life.
I feel so cornered and left alone since noone can help my ears and noone understands the psychological battle I am going through … everything became such a struggle ... every day is just about avoiding the development of new tones and spikes .... where should all this ever end?
I would like to share my whole story, in the hope to get some support, that maybe someone can relate and to warn others in their early days of noise induced tinnitus, if they might read it.
I am 32 years old, male, from Germany, I have always loved loud music, was going to concerts, used headphones loudly, played music in the car loudly … without giving a second thought to my hearing, as it always went well …
I developed tinnitus after an indoor concert about 10 years ago. First, it was a bit distracting, but it went down very quickly to a level where I would only hear it in silent situations – and even then it was quiet. It did not bother me at all – and so again, I did not give it a second thought and continued with the loud music.
That was until 4 months ago. I have been to another indoor concert. It was a concert of Limp Bizkit, a Band I always wanted to see since I was a kid … now it "finally" happened. Little did I know, it would change my life for the worst…
I went with my old school friends, so the retro feeling was perfect. It has been an amazing evening, we had a lot of fun. I just finished my exam and engaged with my GF, I was so happy that I could celebrate it this way. I was enjoying the time so much that I did not think about ear protection … even though I knew an indoor concert already gave me T the last time, and there I was a lot younger.
From this evening on, everything spiraled down very quickly into negativity.
So after this concert I got loud Tinnitus, very high pitched ringing in the middle oft he head. ENT hearing test showed a 40 dB dip at 4 kHz. I took meds (cortisone pills and infusions) which did not help. I got very depressed and thought my life was over. I went to HBOT which also did not help … but somehow, after 3 months, I noticed a difference. I had a problem in the family coming up which distracted me from my tinnitus thoughts. It felt like the tinnitus related anxiety was exchanged by the family stress anxiety … I was still feeling bad, but tinnitus was not an issue in this time. I do not know if you can call that habituation, maybe it would have stayed that way … or maybe not.
But then I did something really stupid. Much more stupid than all the stuff before. A friend invited me over, he got a new car. We were driving in it, it had a big car hifi stereo installed. He wanted to show me how good it was. Since I thought I habituated and felt well again, and since I got earplugs with me which I then inserted, I said OK, but just for a short time please. He cranked it up and the base was massive … I do not know why I did not ask him to put it down or why I did not leave the car … or why I just said NO … I just can't explain why this happened. Seems like it was pure stupidity then ….
Instantly, my ears felt full and my tinnitus was back like before... no wonder this unhabituated me. Of course I fell in a deep, dark hole. I went to HBOT again just to feel a little more save and also did a hearing test at the ENT. It did not show any damage like before … at that point I still thought, well that's good, seems like nothing happened. Even the hearing damage from the concert healed, as it seemed.
After some days, I developed a second tone. It sounds like having a cricket placed in the right ear. It is intermittent, sometimes it is chirping gently, sometimes it sounds like the crickets are on crack. Loudness and duration of the sound do also vary.
Of course, this sound scared me a lot, but I adjusted the best I could. I developed a mild hyperacusis, but I did not feel the urge to protect against everyday to moderate sounds. I did not yet discover Tinnitus Talk at that time.
Which led me to my next mistake. I had a professional cleaning at the dentist. I knew it could get loud, so I brought my earplugs. I put them in, the dentist did ultrasonic cleaning. I asked him in advance if it is loud, and he said, it's ok, and it won't be long. I trusted him ….
I do not know what the experience would have been like without earplugs, but I felt like the occlusion effect ramped up the volume massively … I was left with a spike and a new white-noise tone that appears in my right ear when I hear certain frequencies, like fans or hair driers. I was so desperate, so the ENT did a hearing test again …. And again no damaged shown on that. I said there must be something to it as noise always makes it worse … so he said we will check the inner ear. Unfortunately I did not know what the tympanometry does to your ears … so I did an OAE test (harmless) and the tympanometry … I thought it is that loud because I have hyperacusis … I trusted the ENT as he knew I had acoustic trauma and would not do a procedure that even harms me more … but when I checked what this test is all about (95 dB right in your ear with headphones), I knew I was screwed. Tinnitus spiked and changed again. Since then, I am having 5 different tones, coming and going, 3 of them 24/7, two intermittent ones, and regularly I get little spikes for a few minutes with new random high pitch squeaks. It feels like every time I listen, I hear something different in my ears. My hyperacusis got worse, certain sounds cause TTTS and I developed phonophobia, plugging my ears all day since moderate noises already caused spikes in the last weeks.
I do not know where this is going … I am isolating myself in the fear of sound, if I try to go "unplugged" my tinnitus spikes and I get massive anxiety attacks for days, I am afraid of wax buildup because I use plugs everyday … I am afraid to not be able to ever habituate to this concert in my head as there is always something new and scary … everyday it get's harder to get up and go to work … I am not smiling anymore and people around me are noticing it … yet noone can understand what I am going through … I feel my relationship is endangered and everything is just getting worse and worse ….
Anyone who had a similar experience with multiple noise exposures in a short time? Is there any hope?
Anyone who can relate and has some advise for me, maybe?
Those who plug their ears all the time: how do you get your wax out safely?
Where do you get you extended audiograms? Here in Germany, noone knows about those … I just would like to know what damage I have done
This whole situation is eating me alive and I feel so damn guilty …. It feels like having lost everything in life.
I feel so cornered and left alone since noone can help my ears and noone understands the psychological battle I am going through … everything became such a struggle ... every day is just about avoiding the development of new tones and spikes .... where should all this ever end?