I understand your need to vent. Something weird and charming happened to me a few years ago. I moved to a quiet place far from my precedent troubles. I sat in the calm and i figured out i enjoyed it despite the noise in my head. It is very strange to explain. Hearing a blazing tinnitus and feeling very calm.
I now enjoy sitting in a quiet room. I lay down in my comfy little bed with delight. When i go to bed i feel like my head is exploding and i think "what an horrible noise" but at the same time i am relaxed and enjoy the quiet. I sleep like a baby.
I wish i could help people enjoy calmness like i do. Because i discovered it was possible even with a loud tinnitus (and hear mine over a busy street).
I hope at least your are sleeping well. Do you use masking or distracting techniques ?
First, to Philip: You and your venting are welcome! That's why we all are here. We support each other because even those who love us, and try to help, can't really understand what it's like to have tinnitus, just like I can't truly understand what it would be like to have a severe vision impairment.
Oh, and if it makes you feel better: Garrison Keillor, the famous American humorist and creator of the "Prairie Home Companion" radio show, also hears the "crickets." He has occasionally commented on them in posts and on his show. Keillor has had tinnitus for years. Me, I generally have the buzzing/ringing that sometimes is a gentle hum, escalating to the tea kettle.
Now to Daedalus: I was very taken with your post, as I am working hard on the anxiety/behavioral side of my tinnitus (I consider tinnitus, for many people, to have two sides: the behavior/emotional part, where you work with psychiatrists and therapists and meditative healers; and the brain/ear part, where you bring in the neurologists, the ENTs, etc). I have been seeing a cognitive behavioral therapist who has been tremendously helpful. We focus a lot on the classic CBT concept of objection (fighting against a problem or something imposed on you that makes you feel powerless and out of control) and acceptance (understanding there is much we can't control and then accepting, even embracing, what is challenging you). Some Eastern spiritual practices also employ this.
It seems to me that you have achieved the ability to "accept" and embrace your tinnitus, which can be so hard to do. And in doing so, you found calm. Would you describe it in that way? I know you told Sherri you didn't do anything special to "make" it happen. All the same, it seems you made a conscious, brave decision to enter a quiet place, stop fearing the noise (and fear is such a big part of anxiety), and see what happened.
I may post a thread and ask others about mindful side of accepting tinnitus, which I think could be a big part of habituation for many of us. I have read other good posts here over the months regarding mediation, mindful practices, etc -- things I am learning but still know little about. I can't really find any mediation CDs or CBT books specific to tinnitus. I think this area is greatly overlooked in the treatment of this disorder.
So thanks for getting me thinking, Daedalus, and opening my eyes (and ears!) to new possibilities.
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