Petrified

[Scottrock]

Hi All,

Just woke up from a sleep after a 12 hour/3 flight trip home. Protected the ears well at the airports and on the flights and in the taxi on the way home I was excited because I couldn't hear my T at all. Took a couple of Panadol Night caps and went to bed with some music on hoping/wishing that I would wake up and T would be gone.

It's worse than ever and I am in the midst of a massive anxiety attack. Have reduced hearing on right ear. Just when I thought I had a handle on it!! I feel weak and am experiencing a real sense of hopelessness. I don't understand how the T can be so quiet one minute then squealing the next. I want to rush off to the doctor but know that it would be waste of time. I am shaking - absolutely petrified about the now and more so of the future.

Not sure how I'm gonna cope when going back to work in a couple of days. Can't focus on anything but the T. Please tell me this gets better!!!!!
As I type this it has subsided again. I know - I have to 'harden up' and deal with it!!

 

[Jason Goodwin]

Hi mate
Just hang in there. Mine is up and down also and really loud tonight. Try and distract yourself straight away. Do you have any meds that will calm your nerves and help break the fight or flight anxiety cycle?. I know what you are going through. No BS. I know how hard it is. Just stay strong. This will pass.

 

[Steve Feldo]

Hey Scott, mine was fine on Christmas Day, fell asleep for 10 minutes in front of the TV and it was blaring louder than ever for no reason. By 27th, it was pretty much back to normal levels. I'm new to Tinnitus too and the unpredictable nature is a nightmare but I find stressing makes it much worse. Hang in there buddy. Steve

 

[Lex]

Hi @Scottrock, I have what I consider mild T but to be honest, it isn't mild. I can hear it above most AC systems, so that should give you an idea of its loudness. It also changes a lot, so I sometimes get a high tinny ding, sometimes cicada sounds, sometimes whooshing noises. It would also randomly amplify for a few seconds before changing sounds.

But I barely notice the T because the H consumes my whole being. However, back when I had only T, I was convinced my life was over. Welp, H entered the picture a week later to tell me that I ain't seen nothing yet.

I'm not saying I have it worse than you (because I wouldn't know that). What I'm trying to say is that your mind will latch onto whatever it focuses on. So strive to educate yourself about T but avoid stressing over it. It's not easy but I noticed that my ears are at their most painful when I'm at the height of stress. I assume T and H are similar in that regard.

 

[PaulBe]

Scott, you're tired. Your nervous system is crying out for a decent rest. it may take a few days for it to simmer down...and you are just getting to know the musical variety show that is tinnitus and HF hearing loss. It doesn't generally get much better, you just get better around it.

 

[maltese]

Every time I wake up my tinnitus is different.

Hum. Noise. High pitched. Low pitched. Crickets. All of the above. Volume is more constant but it varies a bit as well. I got used to it and I don't wake up with anxiety 95% of time. And it's not a full-blown panic attack as it used to be. Just a bit of anxiety. It gets better, indeed!

You just need to feel better for a moment, forget about T. You will see you can be perfectly happy human being, with or without tinnitus. Then you will feel like crap again. After some days you will recover again. And fell like crap again. And again and again.

And then your brain will learn that you always will recover and feel happy again and bad days will slowly stop being such a hell. You can't skip those bad days, Sorry. They are a part of the process.

Do something fun like watching a movie or playing a game even if you don't feel like it! Force yourself to have "fun" even if you're miserable inside. "Fake it till you make it". It's the first, small step you need to take.

 

[Scottrock]

Thanks to you all. Guess I'm just feeling lost and pathetic at the moment. I drifted off to sleep again (just exhausted)and woke in a much better place. Gonna spend the rest of the day having a movie marathon with my wife and daughters.
It the fear that I'm struggling with for the first time in my life. I know that you all know exactly what I'm going through. My life is family and music. My family has been fantastic, and the music - well I'll get back to it at some stage soon I hope, perhaps not in the manner that I've been accustomed to. I was meant to be flying to Dubai tomorrow in preparation for a NYE gig, but cancelled. Can't even think about singing or playing at the moment. And I reckon you all know where I'm at - I'm sure you have all had to make lifestyle changes and adjustments.
Might start back at the gym in the morning.
For now though, a few more films and relaxation.
Your support is 'gold', and very much appreciated. I'll try my hardest not to have any more melt downs. Not sure how successful I'll be, but will have a genuine crack at doing so.
Cheers,
Brett

 

[Ed209]

Hi All,

Just woke up from a sleep after a 12 hour/3 flight trip home. Protected the ears well at the airports and on the flights and in the taxi on the way home I was excited because I couldn't hear my T at all. Took a couple of Panadol Night caps and went to bed with some music on hoping/wishing that I would wake up and T would be gone.

It's worse than ever and I am in the midst of a massive anxiety attack. Have reduced hearing on right ear. Just when I thought I had a handle on it!! I feel weak and am experiencing a real sense of hopelessness. I don't understand how the T can be so quiet one minute then squealing the next. I want to rush off to the doctor but know that it would be waste of time. I am shaking - absolutely petrified about the now and more so of the future.

Not sure how I'm gonna cope when going back to work in a couple of days. Can't focus on anything but the T. Please tell me this gets better!!!!!
As I type this it has subsided again. I know - I have to 'harden up' and deal with it!!

It's totally normal for tinnitus to behave like this. I can wake up after a nap with a siren going off in my head. It's an absolutely awful cocophony of noise when I think about it. I no longer care so much what noise I wake up to because my Brain is sort of bored of listening. I got to this stage by just ignoring the noise and trying my best not to emotionally react to it.

The longer you have it the easier it gets, so long as you don't give it any attention. First and foremost you MUST get your anxiety under control.

Try not to worry mate; you'll be fine in the long run.

 

[JasonP]

Hi All,

Just woke up from a sleep after a 12 hour/3 flight trip home. Protected the ears well at the airports and on the flights and in the taxi on the way home I was excited because I couldn't hear my T at all. Took a couple of Panadol Night caps and went to bed with some music on hoping/wishing that I would wake up and T would be gone.

It's worse than ever and I am in the midst of a massive anxiety attack. Have reduced hearing on right ear. Just when I thought I had a handle on it!! I feel weak and am experiencing a real sense of hopelessness. I don't understand how the T can be so quiet one minute then squealing the next. I want to rush off to the doctor but know that it would be waste of time. I am shaking - absolutely petrified about the now and more so of the future.

Not sure how I'm gonna cope when going back to work in a couple of days. Can't focus on anything but the T. Please tell me this gets better!!!!!
As I type this it has subsided again. I know - I have to 'harden up' and deal with it!!

I don't know if this would help but you could research it and check out the reviews on Amazon. I was really all over the place with my mood last night. Today, I took some lithium orotate and it kind of relaxed me. It is a natural supplement that is made by several different manufacturers. I know it isn't a placebo because I noticed my eye get slightly dry (I wear contacts). I really wasn't expecting much at all either, especially in the short term. The other thing I suggest is getting some hearing aids with maskers just to chill you out if you get loud ringing. It takes time for sure to get over it. My main problem has been mood destabilization but I am either bipolar II or have a circadian rhythm disorder. The more I fix that, the more I can deal with T. In fact, I'm so chilled now that the T isn't bothering me even when thinking about it. If I can find that point consistently, I will be able to fight the feelings of T when I notice it even easier and it will be tuned out more and more! There has been many times this month where I have not noticed it. I guess I will see what happens but wish you the best!