Please Help... Night from Hell

[Jaybeee]

Please help, my lovely fellow sufferers. I thought I was getting better. I wasn't panicking so much and my T seemed to be quietening down. Yesterday evening I even managed to "sound out" the noise quite a bit and I was really pleased with myself. However when it came to bedtime my T was off my normal scale. I could hear it with my pillow speaker on full. I felt so cheated, like I was being punished for daring to think I was getting somewhere! In the end I had to take 5 mg Valium and I fell asleep. This morning it is quieter again but I guess that might be the Valium ?

How can I take this anymore? Doc gave me two weeks sick leave and I should go back next week. I can't imagine myself getting ready to face the world and pretending everything is ok. I currently can't eat and have lost so much weight.

Do long term meds reduce the T? I was worried about ototoxicity and didn't want to take anything long term but if my T doesn't settle down I guess I will have to use them?

Might my T still go away? I don't even know why it started, except I became very anxious over a blocked ear that has now cleared up.

Thanks for your support in helping me through

 

[Blackneq]

I know what u mean, every time i think its gone makes its return harder.The obvious answer is to not get ones hopes up and try to accept the fact that it might be permanent, but yea much harder to actually do it.

We are both in our first month so we still hope it will go away but at the same time that makes it worse.Indifference is the answer.

 

[Jaybeee]

@Blackneq are you taking any meds.

 

[Blackneq]

Not at the moment, my T is more of a WHOOSH so i can fall asleep relatively easy and that's a huge thing in this whole mess.

 

[fhs]

If the T is going up and down in volume then most likely a lot of it is panic/stress based which means when it's loud it's just going to be temporary. Baseline would be the lowest volume of T you had since recent onset. If you have a regular doctor I would ask for an ENT specialist because regular doctors don't know any better and just hand out Xanax and Valium without looking at the ototoxicity.

 

[Jaybeee]

@fhs I sincerely hope so. I had an excellent day yesterday. Barely audible. Back up again today though so I do hope my baseline is as yesterday! Edit. Though of course could have been reduced by Valium. I see a correlation with the weather though.

 

[Jomo]

My T has been getting a little tougher to deal with at night as well. (I dont use a sleep pillow) My left ear is my good ear when it comes to T. It is not nearly as focused as it is in my right ear so I sleep on the left. The past few days its been getting louder in the left for whatever reason. Best thing to do is lay flat and play whatever masking sound works best for you. Mine is the sound of the heat being turned up. I put it at a level where I can still hear my T but it takes the edge off and makes it much less intrusive. I then drift away to sleep and find myself laying on my left ear in the morning. Panicking always makes it worse and when that happens your best bet is stop trying to fight through the T and just get yourself back to a relaxed state. Hope this helps.

 

[Tommi_boi]

In my experience and with my T I've had days when it's been louder than ever, Ive had a spike that can last for two weeks and then I'll wake up and it's gone back to a normal low level.

I really believe that there are a few important points from that I've learnt from my friend Mr T:

1) it's got a kind of it's own and no matter what u do it will go away or come back as it wants.
2) Don't panic, T WILL calm down at some point , I bet u almost everyone has good days and bad days - just ignore it and it will act like a spoilt kid and give up for a bit
3) don't stress or get tired - these are the single most important factors that made mine louder

Anyway, botttom line is don't get sad or give up hope , you will be fine

 

[Julianv1975]

Hi all new to this forum. I have been a T sufferer since 2012. Mine was caused through a blast at work. I also have hearing loss in my left ear to accompany the T. Although I eventually habituated and have been living with it last month I was exposed to a loud blast and my T has spiked. Also my right ear has started to show signs of T. This last week my T has gradually been getting louder and louder at bedtime to the point that i am hardly sleeping much. I am a very light sleeper and although I eventually fall asleep either by listening to the TV or some music on my phone I wake up easily and then find it near impossible to fall back asleep. My T has multiplied in volume in both my ears. I consider myself quite strong minded but I find myself feeling really sad and bordering on S thoughts which is sort of scaring me a bit. I know that I need to give my new T time to habituate but I am finding it really hard. I wear a hearing aid on my left ear that helps to mask the T but I am worried that my right is getting worse with each passing day. I have been having a bad couple of days trying to get some sleep and I don't really know what to do. I have a trip planned for tomorrow on my motorbike which I have been planning for nearly a year and I am terrified that the T will totally ruin it. If you are thinking noise motorbike don't worry I use ear plugs all the time. My worry is that I will be away from home and away from my comfort zone. I am writing this after having only slept for two hours. T obviously keeping me awake. What should I do??

 

[AdamR]

Try not listenining the T so much. The more you focus on it the louder it "seems", as your brain is constantly fixated on the sound. Go back to work as well, when you're distacted the brain just doesn't pay attention to silly things.

You will habituate faster if you accept your condition may be permanent and that despite the horror stories here fo most people tinnitus has little or no impact on their quality of life. If your mindset is that T is an awful malady and your life will significantly change, then it probably will.

 

[Julianv1975]

Thanks managed a few more hours of sleep....hoping for a good day

 

[Ed209]

Please help, my lovely fellow sufferers. I thought I was getting better. I wasn't panicking so much and my T seemed to be quietening down. Yesterday evening I even managed to "sound out" the noise quite a bit and I was really pleased with myself. However when it came to bedtime my T was off my normal scale. I could hear it with my pillow speaker on full. I felt so cheated, like I was being punished for daring to think I was getting somewhere! In the end I had to take 5 mg Valium and I fell asleep. This morning it is quieter again but I guess that might be the Valium ?

How can I take this anymore? Doc gave me two weeks sick leave and I should go back next week. I can't imagine myself getting ready to face the world and pretending everything is ok. I currently can't eat and have lost so much weight.

Do long term meds reduce the T? I was worried about ototoxicity and didn't want to take anything long term but if my T doesn't settle down I guess I will have to use them?

Might my T still go away? I don't even know why it started, except I became very anxious over a blocked ear that has now cleared up.

Thanks for your support in helping me through

Jaybeee, tinnitus is very individual and takes everybody a different amount of time to overcome. Mine also varies, so I too get random spikes and loud days that are off the charts. It took time to totally embrace and accept this. I spent far too long looking for cures, reading negative stories, and fearing my situation. The fear stopped me doing a lot of everyday stuff which only tightened the hold that tinnitus had on me. My revelation came once I stopped fighting it and let go 100%. The intrusiveness dropped right off because of the change in my perception. It's a hugely powerful effect.

Give yourself time and go easy on yourself. Next time you hear your tinnitus, ignore it. With every ounce of strength you possess you must try not to emotionally react to it, because it only conditions your mind and central nervous system into seeing it as a threat. Just let the noise be and carry on with your day. Over time you will notice that you stop caring, and the noise will back off in your perception. The reality is that the noise doesn't change, but you just won't tap into it as much consciously.

It was an incredibly hard journey but I came out the other side and so can you. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

 

[Marie79]

Give yourself time and go easy on yourself. Next time you hear your tinnitus, ignore it.

So how do you ignore it? I am still having such a hard time with this. People that habituate say "If I think about it I can hear it but I can tune it out." I am better at not freaking out when I hear it but I don't know how to tune it out. I was just watching TV in the living room and could hear it even though I was watching TV and distracted. It's so hard for me to ignore it

 

[Michael Leigh]

So how do you ignore it? I am still having such a hard time with this. People that habituate say "If I think about it I can hear it but I can tune it out." I am better at not freaking out when I hear it but I don't know how to tune it out. I was just watching TV in the living room and could hear it even though I was watching TV and distracted. It's so hard for me to ignore it

@Marie79 Habituation takes time. The brain will accept the tinnitus, hears it and is not troubled by it and thus, our emotions are not adversely affected. The process of habituation happens automatically and cannot be forced. As Ed rightly says you will learn to ignore it. Although you have had tinnitus a while it still isn't a long time.

Are you using a sound machine at night by your bedside or attached to a pillow speaker? Contrary, to what some people believe, this helps the brain and auditory system to habituate to tinnitus. It would also be beneficial to use sound therapy during waking hours and at work if possible. Gentle nature sounds playing in the background, but not loud enough to draw one's attention. It takes time. You might also want to consider counselling with a hearing therapist.

My post: Answers to Hyperacusis and Habiuation, might be helpful in the link below.
Michael
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/answers-to-hyperacusis-and-habituation.12058/

 

[Marie79]

@Marie79 Habituation takes time. The brain will accept the tinnitus, hears it and is not troubled by it and thus, our emotions are not adversely affected. The process of habituation happens automatically and cannot be forced. As Ed rightly says you will learn to ignore it. Although you have had tinnitus a while it still isn't a long time.

Are you using a sound machine at night by your bedside or attached to a pillow speaker? Contrary, to what some people believe, this helps the brain and auditory system to habituate to tinnitus. It would also be beneficial to use sound therapy during waking hours and at work if possible. Gentle nature sounds playing in the background, but not loud enough to draw one's attention. It takes time. You might also want to consider counselling with a hearing therapist.

My post: Answers to Hyperacusis and Habiuation, might be helpful in the link below.
Michael
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/answers-to-hyperacusis-and-habituation.12058/

Thank you Micheal You are always so helpful. I use everything. I just feel like I will never habituate as it's been over a year. Shouldn't I be here already? Yes I am "better" but not to the point of habituation that I keep hearing about.

 

[Michael Leigh]

@Marie79 I agree with you Marie that a year is quite a while and it would be nice to have habituated by now. However, we are all different. It is for this reason I mentioned being referred to a hearing therapist for counselling. Please do not dismiss the idea, as I've had treatment with a hearing therapist twice in 20 years for my tinnitus with good results.

Most hearing therapists and audiologists that work with tinnitus patients using talk therapy/counselling, also have tinnitus because it is the only way (I believe) they can do their job effectively, as they will know how the condition affects a person emotionally and this is the crux of the matter. It is the way tinnitus affects a person's moods and emotional well-being. With good treatment via a Hearing Therapist/Audiologists a lot can be achieved. A good therapist will teach you how to look at your tinnitus differently and over time the tinnitus will be pushed further into the background making it less intrusive. S/he will mostly likely suggest using sound therapy along with counselling.

The Audiologist that you mentioned a while back in this forum that showed you some slides about tinnitus, and gave you the impression that TRT or CBT is something that you could do yourself, I wouldn't recommed. I am not saying that you need these treatments but they are an option. Talk therapy/ counselling and using sound enrichment as I've suggested might be enough. Although you have done well on your own I feel you need some more help. I know you are concerned about Anti-depressant making your tinnitus worse but in many cases they prevent a person from becoming too down with tinnitus. They act as a safety net. Again, this option shouldn't be dismissed. There are alternatives like: St John's Wort, it is herbal and good for stress and mild depression. I take it as my tinnitus ranges from complete silence, mild, moderate and severe.

Tinnitus forums can be good places to get support but where tinnitus is more problematic one to one treatment with a tinnitus professional I feel is needed. Consider having a word with your GP about my suggestions and getting a referral to see a Hearing Therapist/Audiologist that teaches tinnitus patients how to manage their tinnitus. More is explained in my article: Tinnitus, A Personal View. You can access it by clicking on my "Avatar" and look under "started Theads" it's in the list.

I wish you well.
Michael

 

[Steve Hubert]

I agree with much of what is said here in terms of habitation. That said everyone is different and so is there T. Habitation does make it tolerable, however, oftentimes T can worsen due to subsequent events-trauma, medication, and hearing loss. It's not a linear process.