Struggling really hard here, I am having horrible days.
I have this dilemma... at 20 months since inception my tinnitus has become almost unbearable, I do manage to fall asleep without masking but when I wake up, typically 2-3am, the tinnitus is so horrid that I need to mask or I go mad. It has also a nervous/vibratory quality, it's not just the sound, it hits my whole body. There are very few tracks that work in giving me relief, things with crikets, but they have to be high volume and not all work. This one
with headphones and volume at level 6 in my samsung mobile manages to keep my mind off it, but normal sounds of rain/ waterfalls/ trains etc do not work. Music is completely below my tinnitus frequency so I hear it completely (I hear it during a jet flight and in a loud restaurant, loud traffic...). I cannot bear it during the day anymore for long, my stomach twists and I feel sick, like I want to die, but if I mask for a prolonged time the tinnitus gets even worse.
I have hearing aids with white and pink noise that are effective in masking the sound but same story, if I put them on I get temporary relief but then the tinnitus becomes worse, sometimes permanently worse if I keep them for long like most of the day.
The usual nightmare, the things that work in relieving it short term make it worse.
Should I keep searching for sounds that mask it without worsening it? They do not seem to exist from my experience so far. I read of people listening to music and the radio, I wish I could do that. In the early days that was enough to mask it but the constant worsening I had from inception has now left me with a maddening tinnitus, I am desperate, look at my kids and run to cry in the bathroom because I want to die. It's horrible. Sorry this is not the suicide thread, just venting. Anyway if anyone has any advice on masking please let me know. Thanks in advance.