Ridiculous Spike — Really Need Some Support

[jadebug]

Hey guys I'm so sorry I'm always posting new threads but I really need some help right now. I was really having a good day. I went to a TMJ doctor who made a night guard for me in hopes that it will have some positive effect on my tinnitus. It gave me hope. I also met with my therapist today and I felt more positive.

Then after dinner I was sitting in my living room watching some videos on YouTube like the old me would (not with headphones though) and then suddenly I get this really loud ringing in my left ear like fleeting tinnitus. This has happened a few times before and it's just gone away within seconds but this time the volume only decreased by half so now I have a completely loud and new tone that's freaking me out. I'm so scared. It's not going away and it's been hours. I was doing so well with my T for the past few days and it even seemed like it decreased.

To make matters even worse I just had a huge fight with my boyfriend. He was supposed to come over and see me today before he went on vacation but said his car wasn't starting. I understood but then when my new T tone started I called him crying in desperate need for support and found out he was with friends. He told me he couldn't deal with this drama right now and turned his phone off. I feel so alone. I have no one to talk to right now. Please can you guys try and cheer me up or chat with me? I'm shaking and can't stop crying.

 

[Kolisar]

Hi @jadebug, you never need to apologize for posting. This is the very reason TT exists, and the reason we are all here. We are all here seeking support and to provide it.

I'm sorry your BF can't "deal with the drama". In his defense (and I certainly am NOT defending his actions), he does not understand tinnitus, and does not understand how devastating it can be (including driving some of us to attempt suicide).

We do, and we are here. You will always have someone to "talk" to here.

 

[butterfly75]

I'm so sorry @jadebug We're here for you! You're not alone. There are so many people who care about you and are going through the same thing right now. It sounds like a temporary spike. But don't panic over if it's temporary or permanent because focusing on it will only make you feel worse. Just breathe and say to yourself "I'm not in any danger. I'm safe. I'm afraid right now and I'm having a lot of anxiety but I'm not in any danger. I'm okay." Try to just make it through the rest of the day and just keep assuring yourself that you're safe. Do you have anyone else to talk to? Parent, sibling, relative? When you're feeling like this, it can really help to have someone to talk to. Try to distract yourself if you're alone. Turn on the TV, surf the internet, anything to keep your mind occupied. Find natural ambient noise videos on Youtube like rain, thunder or crickets and keep it on the background. If there's anyone you can talk to try to reach out to them. It's isn't good to be alone in the house when you feel like this. It's going to be okay! The anxiety is going to fade and you're going to feel calm again.

 

[jadebug]

I'm so sorry @jadebug We're here for you! You're not alone. There are so many people who care about you and are going through the same thing right now. It sounds like a temporary spike. But don't panic over if it's temporary or permanent because focusing on it will only make you feel worse. Just breathe and say to yourself "I'm not in any danger. I'm safe. I'm afraid right now and I'm having a lot of anxiety but I'm not in any danger. I'm okay." Try to just make it through the rest of the day and just keep assuring yourself that you're safe. Do you have anyone else to talk to? Parent, sibling, relative? When you're feeling like this, it can really help to have someone to talk to. Try to distract yourself if you're alone. Turn on the TV, surf the internet, anything to keep your mind occupied. Find natural ambient noise videos on Youtube like rain, thunder or crickets and keep it on the background. If there's anyone you can talk to try to reach out to them. It's isn't good to be alone in the house when you feel like this. It's going to be okay! The anxiety is going to fade and you're going to feel calm again.

Thank you so much for the support and advice. Sadly I don't have anyone to talk to right now about this. My mom is asleep (she normally tries to calm me down), my dad gets mad when I talk about T because I "just need to stop thinking about it", and now my boyfriend doesn't care at all. He thinks it's ridiculous I come to this forum at all. He's normally very supportive but today he's just so insensitive. Saying that it's not normal for people to come on the internet and complain about ailments or medical problems. But you guys mean so much to me and have saved me. I'm watching TV with my dad right now so hopefully that will help calm me.

 

[Bill Bauer]

This has happened a few times before and it's just gone away within seconds but this time the volume only decreased by half so now I have a completely loud and new tone that's freaking me out. I'm so scared. It's not going away and it's been hours. I was doing so well with my T for the past few days and it even seemed like it decreased.

I am sorry you had to experience this. I've had my share of spikes...

Polls like
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/the-longest-tinnitus-spike-you-have-had-poll.5903/
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/poll-how-long-was-your-longest-spike.22099/
and
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/poll-how-long-do-your-tinnitus-spikes-usually-last.23110/

show that temporary spikes can last for days, weeks, or even months. There is still a relatively high chance that what you are experiencing is temporary. I would only conclude that it is permanent in case it doesn't improve for over 2 months, and even in some of those cases, I would be wrong, because the spike would actually end up being temporary (as evidenced by those polls).

 

[jadebug]

I am sorry you had to experience this. I've had my share of spikes...

Polls like
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/the-longest-tinnitus-spike-you-have-had-poll.5903/
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/poll-how-long-was-your-longest-spike.22099/
and
https://www.tinnitustalk.com/threads/poll-how-long-do-your-tinnitus-spikes-usually-last.23110/

show that temporary spikes can last for days, weeks, or even months. There is still a relatively high chance that what you are experiencing is temporary. I would only conclude that it is permanent in case it doesn't improve for over 2 months, and even in some of those cases, I would be wrong, because the spike would actually end up being temporary (as evidenced by those polls).

Thank you it helps to know that for most people spikes improve! I was just so worried because this was the first major spike that I had and noticed start. All the other times my T seemed louder I either woke up with it like that or noticed randomly during the day that it sounded differently.

 

[missingsilence]

Hey jadebug,

sorry that you have to go through this right now. I'm relatively new to this, but I had a new tone or a loud spike suddenly appear and I found that after going to sleep with white noise, the next morning I was better. A relaxing tea and a warm shower before sleep help a bit as well. I have mixed feelings about melatonin as I tend to find myself waking up in the middle of the night when taking it.

It's good that your with your dad right now, just being with someone can really help to know that you are not alone. It is hard for people to understand just how debilitating this can be and a lot of people don't fully comprehend how severe it can be or they lack patience. In my experience it has been very hard on my loved ones as well, and while they try to support me they too cannot take it sometimes. I am by no means defending your boyfriend but it can be hard for others to fully comprehend what we go through.

I wish you the best and I hope you feel better soon!

 

[glynis]

Hi @jadebug ,
I'm sorry your feeling down ,we are always here for you around the clock to give you support .
It is hard for people to understand what we go through but we totally understand .
Sending lots of love and hugs your way...
Love glynis xxx

 

[Vicki14]

@jadebug Awh I hope you're feeling a bit calmer now! I understand that panic and anxiety and is the worst feeling ever! This whole thing is tough and those who don't have it hav absolutely no idea how this can affect you. I've just experienced a new spike and am just trying to hold on!! Hugs xx

 

[jadebug]

Hey jadebug,

sorry that you have to go through this right now. I'm relatively new to this, but I had a new tone or a loud spike suddenly appear and I found that after going to sleep with white noise, the next morning I was better. A relaxing tea and a warm shower before sleep help a bit as well. I have mixed feelings about melatonin as I tend to find myself waking up in the middle of the night when taking it.

It's good that your with your dad right now, just being with someone can really help to know that you are not alone. It is hard for people to understand just how debilitating this can be and a lot of people don't fully comprehend how severe it can be or they lack patience. In my experience it has been very hard on my loved ones as well, and while they try to support me they too cannot take it sometimes. I am by no means defending your boyfriend but it can be hard for others to fully comprehend what we go through.

I wish you the best and I hope you feel better soon!

Hey thanks for the advice and support! Thankfully I think the weird spike went away (fingers crossed) although my T is really loud today. I've been reading a lot of your posts and threads and feel exactly the same. I too am a college student and I'm terrified about starting classes back up. Are you going to be going back to school as well or are you gonna take some time off?

 

[jadebug]

@jadebug Awh I hope you're feeling a bit calmer now! I understand that panic and anxiety and is the worst feeling ever! This whole thing is tough and those who don't have it hav absolutely no idea how this can affect you. I've just experienced a new spike and am just trying to hold on!! Hugs xx

Feeling calmer today and I think the spike went away although today seems to be a loud T day for me. Trying to hang in there but just feeling really down and worried about the future and if I'll be able to achieve my goals with T. Hope your spike is subsiding as well. You're strong I know it you can do this!

 

[missingsilence]

Hey thanks for the advice and support! Thankfully I think the weird spike went away (fingers crossed) although my T is really loud today. I've been reading a lot of your posts and threads and feel exactly the same. I too am a college student and I'm terrified about starting classes back up. Are you going to be going back to school as well or are you gonna take some time off?

Glad to hear you're feeling better! I'm still struggling quite a bit, arguably more than ever so I won't be going back yet. I am postponing college until I feel like I can cope on a day to day basis and focus on studying. I tried staying on top of my studies when it got worse but it didn't work out for me.

Are you starting classes soon?

Feel free to message me if you want to talk.

 

[jadebug]

Glad to hear you're feeling better! I'm still struggling quite a bit, arguably more than ever so I won't be going back yet. I am postponing college until I feel like I can cope on a day to day basis and focus on studying. I tried staying on top of my studies when it got worse but it didn't work out for me.

Are you starting classes soon?

Feel free to message me if you want to talk.

Although I don't feel as depressed and scared as yesterday and am so grateful that awful sound in my ear left I'm having a really hard time coping still as well. It's hard being this young with intrusive T. I just want to be like everyone else my age and get myself established and obtain my dream job but it feels like T is trying to steal that away from me.

I think it's very wise and admirable that you're taking time for yourself and trying to be able to better cope with this awful thing before going back to school. I wish I could do the same honestly but since I'm in a nursing program I can't take a break or else I wouldn't be allowed back in and then the last two years I spent working so hard would have all been for nothing so for me I have to at least try. That and my parents don't really get that T is such a big deal to me and would be so disappointed in me if I stopped going to school. I'm so scared though. I used to be a really great student and a perfectionist so it's going to be near impossible for me to make it through. I'm starting the first week of September.

Thanks! Feel free to message me if you ever need someone to talk to or are ever in a low place! I get what it's like to be young and feel hopeless and like life is over because of T. I wish you the best and I really hope you find a solution or your T dimishes/becomes easier to deal with. Keep us all updated!

I also experience that ear fullness you mention in your posts and have no idea why it's happening. It can be just as annoying as T. My doctors think it's TMJ related so definitely check that out. Jaw issues can cause a number of ear related problems since the ear structures are so close to the jaw joint. I also heard it can cause dizziness. Explore all the options and try to remain as positive as possible. That's what I've been doing and it's the only thing that's keeping me sane. Best of luck!

 

[missingsilence]

Although I don't feel as depressed and scared as yesterday and am so grateful that awful sound in my ear left I'm having a really hard time coping still as well. It's hard being this young with intrusive T. I just want to be like everyone else my age and get myself established and obtain my dream job but it feels like T is trying to steal that away from me.

I think it's very wise and admirable that you're taking time for yourself and trying to be able to better cope with this awful thing before going back to school. I wish I could do the same honestly but since I'm in a nursing program I can't take a break or else I wouldn't be allowed back in and then the last two years I spent working so hard would have all been for nothing so for me I have to at least try. That and my parents don't really get that T is such a big deal to me and would be so disappointed in me if I stopped going to school. I'm so scared though. I used to be a really great student and a perfectionist so it's going to be near impossible for me to make it through. I'm starting the first week of September.

Thanks! Feel free to message me if you ever need someone to talk to or are ever in a low place! I get what it's like to be young and feel hopeless and like life is over because of T. I wish you the best and I really hope you find a solution or your T dimishes/becomes easier to deal with. Keep us all updated!

I also experience that ear fullness you mention in your posts and have no idea why it's happening. It can be just as annoying as T. My doctors think it's TMJ related so definitely check that out. Jaw issues can cause a number of ear related problems since the ear structures are so close to the jaw joint. I also heard it can cause dizziness. Explore all the options and try to remain as positive as possible. That's what I've been doing and it's the only thing that's keeping me sane. Best of luck!

Thank you Jadebug,

I understand, it sometimes feels like T has robbed me of my future, everyone is our age is out there living normal lives and not worrying about issues like T. I used to be among the best in my class and after my T got worse I was slipping and that hurt me a lot.

It's good that you are trying to do your best in school, I understand that leaving would not be an easy option. I hope it gets better with time. A doctor I saw now also is investigating the possibility of my jaw having an impact on my symptoms. I'll see how this develops with more time.

I wish you the best and good luck at school!

 

[Jordyn]

idk how old you are or how long u been dating ur bf but uhmmmm ... dump him. before i married my hubby he was the only reason i didn't lose my my sh*t with tinnitus. you will need a more solid support system than that.

as far as your T, i had this approximate issue when i had my neck propped up really steep a few times. sounded like fleeting T but lasted longer. i wonder if you have a pinched nerve? any neck or shoulder pain?

 

[jadebug]

Thank you Jadebug,

I understand, it sometimes feels like T has robbed me of my future, everyone is our age is out there living normal lives and not worrying about issues like T. I used to be among the best in my class and after my T got worse I was slipping and that hurt me a lot.

It's good that you are trying to do your best in school, I understand that leaving would not be an easy option. I hope it gets better with time. A doctor I saw now also is investigating the possibility of my jaw having an impact on my symptoms. I'll see how this develops with more time.

I wish you the best and good luck at school!

I also was one of the best in my class and I'm hoping that I can actually keep that up but I'm unsure. I'm sure one day you'll be able to return to your studies and be at the top of your class again. Time is very important with T. Thank you! Keep the forum updated on your progress if you can! I'd be really interested in seeing if your jaw issues could be causing your T and other weird symptoms.

 

[jadebug]

idk how old you are or how long u been dating ur bf but uhmmmm ... dump him. before i married my hubby he was the only reason i didn't lose my my sh*t with tinnitus. you will need a more solid support system than that.

as far as your T, i had this approximate issue when i had my neck propped up really steep a few times. sounded like fleeting T but lasted longer. i wonder if you have a pinched nerve? any neck or shoulder pain?

I'm 20 and I've been dating my bf for a year and a half. He's normally a really supportive person but since we're young he wants to hang out a lot with his friends, which I understand but it kind of hurts sometimes when it feels like he chooses them over me and isn't there for me when I need him most. That's a whole other issue though and at least I'm getting some support with him.

My parents are much worse than him. My dad will actually get mad or yell at me that I'm talking about this again and tell me it's my fault it's bothering me so much because I always think about it. My mom gets really upset when she hears how I'm suffering so while she gives me support and comes to doctors appointments with me she constantly is saying that she doesn't know what else she can do for me.

At this point I feel like I'd rather just be dead. I'm such a burden to everyone and I'm constantly miserable. Now that you mention it during that incident I did have some neck pain during the day. My doctors think I'm having TMJ issues so hopefully when I get my night guard I may experience some relief.

 

[Jordyn]

you are going to be met with many ppl who don't understand - when i hear myself saying what it's like to people i hear a huge discrepancy myself of how it feels and how i'm describing it feels cause words just don't cut it. that's why you have us here. we get it only because we got it as well. it's more than annoying - everyone you know can walk away from annoying sounds if they want and sleep tight when they want. they don't know what this is like. so be among people who are either sympathetic or understand you like we do. ❤

I'm 20 and I've been dating my bf for a year and a half. He's normally a really supportive person but since we're young he wants to hang out a lot with his friends, which I understand but it kind of hurts sometimes when it feels like he chooses them over me and isn't there for me when I need him most. That's a whole other issue though and at least I'm getting some support with him.

My parents are much worse than him. My dad will actually get mad or yell at me that I'm talking about this again and tell me it's my fault it's bothering me so much because I always think about it. My mom gets really upset when she hears how I'm suffering so while she gives me support and comes to doctors appointments with me she constantly is saying that she doesn't know what else she can do for me.

At this point I feel like I'd rather just be dead. I'm such a burden to everyone and I'm constantly miserable. Now that you mention it during that incident I did have some neck pain during the day. My doctors think I'm having TMJ issues so hopefully when I get my night guard I may experience some relief.

 

[jadebug]

you are going to be met with many ppl who don't understand - when i hear myself saying what it's like to people i hear a huge discrepancy myself of how it feels and how i'm describing it feels cause words just don't cut it. that's why you have us here. we get it only because we got it as well. it's more than annoying - everyone you know can walk away from annoying sounds if they want and sleep tight when they want. they don't know what this is like. so be among people who are either sympathetic or understand you like we do. ❤

Thank you I'm so grateful to this community. I don't know what I would do without the support. My T is roaring loud right now and I'm trying not to have a breakdown. I just wish I had some way to escape this torture.

 

[Jordyn]

idk how loud it is for you but i have an aromatherapy diffuser that got me through a spike when trying to sleep. it would be pretty loud for me when i tried to sleep but the diffuser somehow masked it without making too much noise itself.

 

[jadebug]

idk how loud it is for you but i have an aromatherapy diffuser that got me through a spike when trying to sleep. it would be pretty loud for me when i tried to sleep but the diffuser somehow masked it without making too much noise itself.

Thank you I have been trying to find things that mask my T. I have two types of sounds so what works for one usually makes the other worse. I'll try the diffuser though thanks a bunch!

 

[butterfly75]

At this point I feel like I'd rather just be dead. I'm such a burden to everyone and I'm constantly miserable. Now that you mention it during that incident I did have some neck pain during the day. My doctors think I'm having TMJ issues so hopefully when I get my night guard I may experience some relief.

I'm so sorry @jadebug I know exactly how you feel If you ever need to talk my inbox is open Hope things get better for you.

 

[jadebug]

I'm so sorry @jadebug I know exactly how you feel If you ever need to talk my inbox is open Hope things get better for you.

Thank you so much! You always reply to my posts, which I appreciate so so much, and I see what encouraging things you're always writing on others posts as well. You're such a ray of sunshine despite your suffering and this community is lucky to have someone like you. I hope things get better for you as well!