- May 5, 2016
- 2,594
- Tinnitus Since
- 1988
- Cause of Tinnitus
- loud noise and very bad sickness
Hey TT, (Warning- long/emotional post)
It's the local helper Fish and I wanted to write another motivational thread for those that at times seem lost and see no hope. My posts are here to inspire people and not insult people. This post is simply reflecting some of my experiences and hopefully it can help someone out.
Guys/gals my life is filled with so so much affliction, it's a chore to live life at times. Daily issues and illnesses that are here. No one to bring me that nice hot cup of soup when I am sick. I do not have access to @Jazzer and his pussycats, I do have 3 loving little dogs and i cuddle them a lot
This year has been another difficult year for me, it's been hell and we still have 2 months to go. In April I was having insane headaches, daily. The pressure was so so bad that it amplified my tinnitus to a new demon level. I do blame myself though, the 5-6 months prior to that I was eating very badly and just being lazy. I got these headaches and I ended up going to ER and they never asked about my lifestyle, my eating habits, stress levels, non of that. They simply see that I have a high blood pressure and they pumped me with meds and I felt worst. It did not end there, I ended up in the hospital for close to 5 days. Pumped with more pills and doctors telling me that I had no chance of living a normal life unless I was taking pills for the rest of my life
I am laying in a hospital bed, while my only support I had my 3 little dogs (2 of them sick and need meds 4 times a day) were caged up in my pad for close to 20+ hours a day. One of my dogs is 17 years old and I was very afraid of losing him. I have no parents, no family, these little people, my willpower are what keeps me going and alive each day.
One day in the hospital became another and another and another. The nurses and their doctors never asked about my lifestyle, how I eat, my support system, my diet, my stress....non of that. They just pushed pills and fear on me. You need to take these pills if you want to live your life.
I was scared and frustrated, so I gave in and went home and began taking their pills. I was on them pills for 7 days and each day I could not get off the couch. I could not even walk to the bathroom without being dizzy and everything was abstract to me. My depression was back in full force, I was having a hard time seeing and thinking, It was scary. I called some distant family and they never cared to call me back back and check to see if I was ok.
i was in another fight for my life and I knew that if i remained a victim to this oppression then my life was pretty much over. I had no control of my daily living and It was very scary and it was a mess. All alone in my pad with 3 dogs that needed love and meds and they need a functional owner to take care of them. I couldn't even take care of myself.
Through my willpower and my drive and my faith I stopped taking them pills and I weened of them. It was affecting me real bad. My stomach was cramping all day. I had dizziness for 3-5 hours a day and this continued on for about almost 2 months after I was off the pills. It was brutal and it was hell. I kept telling myself daily that THINGS ARE GOING TO BE OK. YOU ARE GOING TO BE OK. YOU WILL BEAT THIS. I PROMISE YOU.
Lots of tears flowed, lots of hope was needed. Lots of healing needed to come. I knew it was a slow process for me. It is always a slow process for me. I told myself that I needed to go to the gym and do more, to beat this demon that was eating me up daily. Lets not forget my ears are always loud and somewhat deaf to sounds as well.
I started going to the gym and I slowly turned my afflictions around. It took me about 3 months to turn this hell around and see some light.
......................................
About three months ago, I mad a bad choice and at very bad at certain places and I ruined my stomach. It messed me up and made my life a living hell. daily stomach pain, daily burning in throat and stomach. I could not eat anything. Even water burned my throat. I was like, geez another hell hole that I have to deal with. Affliction cane again for me. 3 months of PURE hell was upon me. I was losing weight and becoming a skeleton and i was feeling very sick. If I lost more weight, I would have ended up in the hospital.
I could not walk without being dizzy. I had to force myself to drive my car and walk the supermarket while feeling like i was going to faint. I had to wear more t-shirts because I did not want my friends to see the once muscular soul, now looking like a skeleton. It was both a mental and physical torture. I was scared. Each day i was checking my scale and hoping that I did not lose more weight and hoping that I would not hurt my body more. I was advised to eat bland food and basically eat like a rabbit. This was making me sick and I was losing energy to live a life.
I went to Drs and had multiple exams. I passed all of them and I finally said the hell with this. I took matters into my own hands and did more research and talked with everybody that I knew. I listened and learned about my issue and put a plan together.
There was no way in hell I would let this beat me. I learned lots of lessons from my hospital experience and I used it to fight this devil. Guys/gals it took me over 3+ months to beat this issue. I had to take action daily, my life depended on it. My dogs depended on me.
This post was long but it shows you courage and willpower THAT ALL OF US HAVE! If I did nothing and just did was my affliction wanted me to do, Id still be on my pills and laying on the couch and feeling helpless. I'd be a walking stick and very sick and still not being able to eat food.
This is 6 months of hell that I have endured, on top of my tinnitus and my fibromylagia. Read this post and get inspired. I for damn sure am not tooting a horn here, I am telling you guys/gals that even in affliction we can still try to do things can get better....
NEVER LOSE HOPE, NEVER!
PS- I am eating well now and I have returned to the gym and my martial arts. I will never forget these lessons. I carry them and use them in the future to better my life and the life of others.
It's the local helper Fish and I wanted to write another motivational thread for those that at times seem lost and see no hope. My posts are here to inspire people and not insult people. This post is simply reflecting some of my experiences and hopefully it can help someone out.
Guys/gals my life is filled with so so much affliction, it's a chore to live life at times. Daily issues and illnesses that are here. No one to bring me that nice hot cup of soup when I am sick. I do not have access to @Jazzer and his pussycats, I do have 3 loving little dogs and i cuddle them a lot
This year has been another difficult year for me, it's been hell and we still have 2 months to go. In April I was having insane headaches, daily. The pressure was so so bad that it amplified my tinnitus to a new demon level. I do blame myself though, the 5-6 months prior to that I was eating very badly and just being lazy. I got these headaches and I ended up going to ER and they never asked about my lifestyle, my eating habits, stress levels, non of that. They simply see that I have a high blood pressure and they pumped me with meds and I felt worst. It did not end there, I ended up in the hospital for close to 5 days. Pumped with more pills and doctors telling me that I had no chance of living a normal life unless I was taking pills for the rest of my life
I am laying in a hospital bed, while my only support I had my 3 little dogs (2 of them sick and need meds 4 times a day) were caged up in my pad for close to 20+ hours a day. One of my dogs is 17 years old and I was very afraid of losing him. I have no parents, no family, these little people, my willpower are what keeps me going and alive each day.
One day in the hospital became another and another and another. The nurses and their doctors never asked about my lifestyle, how I eat, my support system, my diet, my stress....non of that. They just pushed pills and fear on me. You need to take these pills if you want to live your life.
I was scared and frustrated, so I gave in and went home and began taking their pills. I was on them pills for 7 days and each day I could not get off the couch. I could not even walk to the bathroom without being dizzy and everything was abstract to me. My depression was back in full force, I was having a hard time seeing and thinking, It was scary. I called some distant family and they never cared to call me back back and check to see if I was ok.
i was in another fight for my life and I knew that if i remained a victim to this oppression then my life was pretty much over. I had no control of my daily living and It was very scary and it was a mess. All alone in my pad with 3 dogs that needed love and meds and they need a functional owner to take care of them. I couldn't even take care of myself.
Through my willpower and my drive and my faith I stopped taking them pills and I weened of them. It was affecting me real bad. My stomach was cramping all day. I had dizziness for 3-5 hours a day and this continued on for about almost 2 months after I was off the pills. It was brutal and it was hell. I kept telling myself daily that THINGS ARE GOING TO BE OK. YOU ARE GOING TO BE OK. YOU WILL BEAT THIS. I PROMISE YOU.
Lots of tears flowed, lots of hope was needed. Lots of healing needed to come. I knew it was a slow process for me. It is always a slow process for me. I told myself that I needed to go to the gym and do more, to beat this demon that was eating me up daily. Lets not forget my ears are always loud and somewhat deaf to sounds as well.
I started going to the gym and I slowly turned my afflictions around. It took me about 3 months to turn this hell around and see some light.
......................................
About three months ago, I mad a bad choice and at very bad at certain places and I ruined my stomach. It messed me up and made my life a living hell. daily stomach pain, daily burning in throat and stomach. I could not eat anything. Even water burned my throat. I was like, geez another hell hole that I have to deal with. Affliction cane again for me. 3 months of PURE hell was upon me. I was losing weight and becoming a skeleton and i was feeling very sick. If I lost more weight, I would have ended up in the hospital.
I could not walk without being dizzy. I had to force myself to drive my car and walk the supermarket while feeling like i was going to faint. I had to wear more t-shirts because I did not want my friends to see the once muscular soul, now looking like a skeleton. It was both a mental and physical torture. I was scared. Each day i was checking my scale and hoping that I did not lose more weight and hoping that I would not hurt my body more. I was advised to eat bland food and basically eat like a rabbit. This was making me sick and I was losing energy to live a life.
I went to Drs and had multiple exams. I passed all of them and I finally said the hell with this. I took matters into my own hands and did more research and talked with everybody that I knew. I listened and learned about my issue and put a plan together.
There was no way in hell I would let this beat me. I learned lots of lessons from my hospital experience and I used it to fight this devil. Guys/gals it took me over 3+ months to beat this issue. I had to take action daily, my life depended on it. My dogs depended on me.
This post was long but it shows you courage and willpower THAT ALL OF US HAVE! If I did nothing and just did was my affliction wanted me to do, Id still be on my pills and laying on the couch and feeling helpless. I'd be a walking stick and very sick and still not being able to eat food.
This is 6 months of hell that I have endured, on top of my tinnitus and my fibromylagia. Read this post and get inspired. I for damn sure am not tooting a horn here, I am telling you guys/gals that even in affliction we can still try to do things can get better....
NEVER LOSE HOPE, NEVER!
PS- I am eating well now and I have returned to the gym and my martial arts. I will never forget these lessons. I carry them and use them in the future to better my life and the life of others.
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