The Next Time Someone Doesn't Sympathize with Your Tinnitus Suffering, Maybe You Should Do This

[JasonP]

The sad part is that many humans don't sympathize with something unless they go through it themselves, then they start to understand the pain. For example, when I was a little kid I was taught that other kids went hungry and were starving and I thought well that sounds bad but I didn't realize HOW bad it was until I was starving myself one day. Fortunately, for me it it wasn't for long. Now, when I hear about starving kids and I think back to that time it hits home. Its like the old adage, "when the shoe is on the other foot". Now about the tinnitus and how to help people understand better......

What you can do is use a software program called Audacity or something else like a frequency generator, white noise generator, etc. and record the tones and static and buzzing that make up your tinnitus. Put it on a LONG playing mp3 file, for example, 24 hours long. Then put it on an mp3 player and tell them to listen to it all day on headphones. (Of course it should be at a safe level). I would imagine more people than not, would take those headphones off before 24 hours was up. I think this is a great way for them to understand what you go through. Thumbs up if you think this is a good idea.

 

[LeQuack]

No I think they still won't understand. Because they know they can always stop listening to it whenever they want. There is no fear, no depression and hopelessness that you feel with tinnitus. It's not just hearing the sound, that's just the start.

 

[gotyoubynuts]

No I think they still won't understand. Because they know they can always stop listening to it whenever they want. There is no fear, no depression and hopelessness that you feel with tinnitus. It's not just hearing the sound, that's just the start.

They might understand if they were kidnapped, put black masks on, thrown into a small room, tinnitus sounds blasting for a few days. The horror could be equal then... until it's over for them but not for us.

 

[Gosia]

How do you want to convince anybody to take part in the experiment, to begin with ? only very close relatives could do that and those are usually sympathizing with us. It's in human nature to pretend that the problem doesn't exist rather than embrace it . Our condtion scares people so it's difficult to make it talk about wildly. Not to mention that if they wanted to take the risk for themselves seriously they would have to renounce many loud activities they like so ...I tried to raise their conciousness - a waste of time. Although T is very common, it's still not common enough to become a social issue.

 

[Gosia]

* to make it talked about widely.. ( sorry; comp problems..)

 

[glynis]

I had some good advice off a counsellor.
He said we don't have to justify our illness and how it effects us to anyone.
We are in control and our doctors know our condition.
I just say my ears are giving me a hard time so bear with me and if they ask questions I will gladly give them a reply....lots of love glynis

 

[Alue]

They wouldn't listen to it for more than 60 seconds. A lot of people just don't have empathy for others. They only care about themselves. That's just the world we live in.

The thing that irritates me the most, is my tinnitus was cause by an incident at work that should never have happened. The person that caused it and management, HR, etc. all think it's not a big deal since I have normal hearing still. Everything was minimized and I was told I'm not allowed to talk about it. Meanwhile it has turned my life into a nightmare.

 

[GregCA]

No I think they still won't understand. Because they know they can always stop listening to it whenever they want. There is no fear, no depression and hopelessness that you feel with tinnitus. It's not just hearing the sound, that's just the start.

Exactly.
If all of us with T were told "it's going to go away in <fill in the blank with some short/mid term deadline>", we'd feel extremely relieved, in a much better mood, and coping much better, because we would see the light at the end of the tunnel (I'd cope much better if someone told me "dude you have to live with this for another year, then it'll go away for sure").

It's the inability to escape it in perpetuity that make this annoying stimulus so stressful, and that condition cannot be reproduced in a "sympathy experiment".

 

[Mike82]

Now about the tinnitus and how to help people understand better......

Why do they need to?

I'm sure my girlfriend gets period pain every month, but I don't find myself punching my stomach, or giving myself nosebleeds, to prove that I can empathise. What difference would it make?

I'm all for raising awareness to help prevent people from getting tinnitus - it would have helped me! - but as for the fact that the ringing in my ears annoys me constantly, it's my cross to bear and all the empathy in the world won't change that.

 

[Alue]

Exactly.
If all of us with T were told "it's going to go away in <fill in the blank with some short/mid term deadline>", we'd feel extremely relieved, in a much better mood, and coping much better, because we would see the light at the end of the tunnel (I'd cope much better if someone told me "dude you have to live with this for another year, then it'll go away for sure").

It's the inability to escape it in perpetuity that make this annoying stimulus so stressful, and that condition cannot be reproduced in a "sympathy experiment".

Exactly! I've had kidney stones. While awful and worse in the short term than tinnitus, you know there is an end to the pain. I've been through a lot, I can endure a lot if I know there is an end, but this perpetual noise that affects every aspect of my life and will never go away is one of the worst things I've had happen to me.

 

[GregCA]

Why do they need to?

I'm sure my girlfriend gets period pain every month, but I don't find myself punching my stomach, or giving myself nosebleeds, to prove that I can empathise. What difference would it make?

I'm all for raising awareness to help prevent people from getting tinnitus - it would have helped me! - but as for the fact that the ringing in my ears annoys me constantly, it's my cross to bear and all the empathy in the world won't change that.

I think the point is that most people are under the impression that it is a benign condition (when they know what it is, that is: the first psychiatrist I went to did not even know what tinnitus was), and because of that, the amount of resources allocated to finding a "cure" (or anything that can relieve us anyway) is somewhat proportional to the seemingly low importance of this condition.
I'm not sure empathy is the main goal (although it sure is nice when people understand the hell you're going through rather than dismissing you as if you were a weakling who just needs to toughen up).

 

[GregCA]

Exactly! I've had kidney stones. While awful and worse in the short term than tinnitus, you know there is an end to the pain. I've been through a lot, I can endure a lot if I know there is an end, but this perpetual noise that affects every aspect of my life and will never go away is one of the worst things I've had happen to me.

Same here. I had kidney stones and I would trade my T in a heartbeat: KS pain is bounded in time (and can be alleviated a good deal with meds).

 

[Tamika]

Exactly! I've had kidney stones. While awful and worse in the short term than tinnitus, you know there is an end to the pain. I've been through a lot, I can endure a lot if I know there is an end, but this perpetual noise that affects every aspect of my life and will never go away is one of the worst things I've had happen to me.

I agree. For me T is the hardest thing ever, and I've been through plenty of challenges. I've had a couple of serious very painful things happen that have landed me in hospital on morphine. One was kidney pain and the other an accident where my body broke through a car windscreen - extreme pain, time in wheelchair etc. I'd trade going through all that again to be rid of T.

 

[Enid]

Whenever I mention my tinnitus its oh yes iv that too, its just the sound passing through eae hairs, you'll soon get used to it, play the radio on a static channel, nothing your gp can do, oh you should forget about it and think of something else. In actual fact my gp has been sympathetic even if she's convinced its earwax and olive oil and an ear syringe will sort me out!!

 

[Beste]

My bf told me today that she showed her tinnitus sound to her boyfriend and his reaction was "Oh God! How is it possible! I'd kill myself"

I know I'd do the same thing as him 4 months ago..