MemberI think much of it comes down to acceptance. The less we fight against it the better, but this pretty significant milestone can be hard to reach. I had to change my entire lifestyle but I had no choice really. My philosophy is to try and adapt to all the challenges that life throws at us, and tinnitus isn't my first rodeo when it comes to extremely debilitating health conditions. I think my history helped me resolve my issues with the screaming noise that I have in my head. The alternative is to fight against the T, which in my opinion only strengthens the stranglehold it has on us, and really doesn't help. If we can reduce other life stresses, as well, then we improve our chances of getting our life back on track.
The Power of Accepting
- Thread starter fishbone
- Start date
I think much of it comes down to acceptance. The less we fight against it the better, but this pretty significant milestone can be hard to reach. I had to change my entire lifestyle but I had no choice really. My philosophy is to try and adapt to all the challenges that life throws at us, and tinnitus isn't my first rodeo when it comes to extremely debilitating health conditions. I think my history helped me resolve my issues with the screaming noise that I have in my head. The alternative is to fight against the T, which in my opinion only strengthens the stranglehold it has on us, and really doesn't help. If we can reduce other life stresses, as well, then we improve our chances of getting our life back on track.
- Oct 14, 2016
- 1,270
- Tinnitus Since
- All my life, but got worse 2016
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Noise induced / Concert
Dear @TLion - please forget all about shame.
We have all been cast in the role of heroes, which we would never have chosen - we were not cut out for it, but we were given no choice.
Tinnitus has turned our lives into survival courses.
We are all searching for relative comfort, a way to alleviate the suffering we face, and it is far from easy.
Sometimes I think that the apparently brave ones are simply better at the putting a brave face on things.
Very best wishes to you TL, and keep coming back on here, maybe we can all figure something out together; it's nice to have the company anyway,
Dave
Jazzer
- May 5, 2016
- 2,594
- Tinnitus Since
- 1988
- Cause of Tinnitus
- loud noise and very bad sickness
Thanks! My dogs are doing fine, the sick one is doing ok so far. She is on 4 meds right now and it's helping her live and survive
Absolutely true. Decide to be happy. Not just for tinnitus. For everything. Exercise every day. It's the miracle cure. Have lots of love and sex in your live. Live and be happy, whatever the struggles
I have problems far worse than my tinnitus and I know people far worse than me.
I have problems far worse than my tinnitus and I know people far worse than me.
I remember reading a quote somewhere, years ago, regarding the importance of "acceptance":
"My serenity is directly proportional to my level of acceptance."
So, they implied that their acceptance of people, things and situations, as they are, was essential in order for them to have piece of mind.
When I was young, I would really add to my anger, resentment and frustration levels by not accepting people, things and life's situations as they were. Which made life even more difficult for me.
"My serenity is directly proportional to my level of acceptance."
So, they implied that their acceptance of people, things and situations, as they are, was essential in order for them to have piece of mind.
When I was young, I would really add to my anger, resentment and frustration levels by not accepting people, things and life's situations as they were. Which made life even more difficult for me.
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IMO do not compare your pain/suffering to someone else. I learned that it's not productive. Your pain/suffering is your own and you should never feel guilty about it and other should never judge you for it.
back in my teenage shroom days my close friend in shrooming said something profound while on shrooms,
"don't expect, accept".
still holds true to this day.
"don't expect, accept".
still holds true to this day.
- May 5, 2016
- 2,594
- Tinnitus Since
- 1988
- Cause of Tinnitus
- loud noise and very bad sickness
Expectations/Attachments can shatter the heart/mind/soul. The less of each, the better we shall be....
no dude, I expect that if I follow Jesus's teachings and don't live in sin, that I will be judged worthy to live in the New Jerusalem for all eternity. That is a total expectation because God has proclaimed it and it is the truth. Like 2+2=4.
- May 5, 2016
- 2,594
- Tinnitus Since
- 1988
- Cause of Tinnitus
- loud noise and very bad sickness
I am talking earthly expectations/attachments, flesh expectation/attachments...NOT what Jesus has promised and the expectations from our heavenly father.....
- Jul 29, 2018
- 125
- 63
- Tinnitus Since
- 07/2018
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Phone ring tone directly in my ear/hearing loss 15% l, 25% r
Hi Fishbone It is hard to argue with you, for acceptance is really the best way forward. I must admit though that it is like finding balance, easy to say, and not always easy to acheive. But, I will admit, when you write, I do read and listen. As I start down this road, and as I am living with good days which gives me hope it will fade, or dare I hope heal (I do experience periods of silence which I am grateful for, and aware that that statement can not be made by everyone with T), and then not so good days where my ears are angry for lack of any other phrase, and my hope in the future is challenged (today as my right ear rings clear and loud), I do find solace in your words as they help me look past my moments of distress to a future with all sorts of possiblitities. Thank you for your posts, they are timely and appreciated.
JohnCC
JohnCC
- Oct 14, 2016
- 1,270
- Tinnitus Since
- All my life, but got worse 2016
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Noise induced / Concert
Our bodies are mere vessels, nothing more. We won't take it with us after death, just enjoy life now because time will fly by mighty fast! =D
Mishal Almutairi
Member
- Jul 15, 2018
- 17
- Tinnitus Since
- 2017 December
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Wisdom removal with high dose Antibiotics
@fishbone @glynis - Sometimes a lot of people wake up with a low mood, and low energy & the day starts off badly. Do you think that most people feel bad as the default? People like my mom wake up full of life, regardless of any health issues and she has macular and tinnitus. I ask her many times, how do you feel physically, she says fine and full of energy. I ask you aren't dead tired in the mornings? Don't feel like you need hours to snap into yourself? I think a lot of hopelessness like many others here, is actually also spurred by feeling physically unwell too. I hate the mornings. When sun goes a way, I feel fine regardless of anything. What gives. Why are the early times of the day so hard physically and mentally? Is my mind to blame?
Tinnitus is one issue, theres muscle fasciculations 24/7, visual snow, migraines etc you get the point. It compounds, it shows itself the moment I'm up. Why do some people feel better than others do even with chronic dis-ease? Does that make it easier for them to face their problems? Is my mind the culprit? x
Tinnitus is one issue, theres muscle fasciculations 24/7, visual snow, migraines etc you get the point. It compounds, it shows itself the moment I'm up. Why do some people feel better than others do even with chronic dis-ease? Does that make it easier for them to face their problems? Is my mind the culprit? x
I once played a U.K. tour with a black lady Gospel/Blues singer, which culminated at the Edinburgh Jazz Festival.
She was good at both.
I said to her "you sing those gospel songs with such conviction."
Noticing a degree of surprise in my voice, she said "Listen here boy, (1 was 60 - she was 50), if you take religion away from our black asses (arses) we ain't got nuthin' left...!!"
I do like talking to believers - it always amazes me where they get their conviction from.
I might just learn something.
She was good at both.
I said to her "you sing those gospel songs with such conviction."
Noticing a degree of surprise in my voice, she said "Listen here boy, (1 was 60 - she was 50), if you take religion away from our black asses (arses) we ain't got nuthin' left...!!"
I do like talking to believers - it always amazes me where they get their conviction from.
I might just learn something.
- Aug 29, 2015
- 7,069
- Tinnitus Since
- 2004
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Meniere's Disease
@Mishal Almutairi ,
I wake up ok some days and like today really tired but was 4 AM before I fell asleep and will take an our to come round a bit.
If you are on medication that can also effect on how you wake up.
love glynis
I wake up ok some days and like today really tired but was 4 AM before I fell asleep and will take an our to come round a bit.
If you are on medication that can also effect on how you wake up.
love glynis
This is very inspiring fishbone. How old are you? I was 20 when I first got health problems and I definitely didn't go down the route of acceptance.Hi guys/gals it's your local helper fishbone. I am writing another post and sharing a story from my life and my struggles and triumphs and I hope it can help someone out.
Some of you who regularly read my posts, kinda have an idea as to what I go through day in and day
out in my life. I have brutal ringing/high pitched in both ears and it's not maskable. I have very bad body pain, all over my body from my fibromyalgia, 2 4-7.
recently I had a promotion in my martial arts and we had to do stuff, that a normal person would pass out from. My body is beat up , my mind is tierd...I am not a normal person (in that sense). I have pain and ringing and deal with being alone 2 4 7. It's a tough life, but I guess I was chosen to live it and thrive in it.
For the past 2 days, I have had a very nasty head pressure (I always have these, but lately its been more difficult). My whole face feels very tense and I feel pain and a bad sensation in my jaws. I was talking to my friend last night. He was telling me that his ankles hurt, I was like you are very lucky. My whole body is in pain from head to toe, my ears are ringing and it's hell and my face and jaws are in pain.
He asked if i am taking any meds/pain killers for it. I said, no, I am just handling the pain and smiling and living my life.
He said, how can you handle such misery and horror like this and not get emotional over it and not lose it.
I said, because losing it will not make my ringing go away. Losing it will not make my fibro go away. Losing it will not make my jaws, headaches and pains go away.
I simply told him that I ACCEPT my issues and don't challenge it. I use to not be this way when I was younger, I'd fight it, get angry and just not accept it. All that did was make my issues worst and not help. When I use to challenge my issues, it simply ramped up my stress, and made my tinnitus much much worst.
Now I know myself pretty well and I have been dealing with these issues for quite awhile. Still at times, I get new surprises that hit me upside the head. I have been to many doctors and tried my best, to resolve my issues and I had lots of high hopes. Nothing worked and no answers, when I got to that point...I knew that acceptance was key and fighting it would just not make this stuff go away.
I live by the motto - IT IS-WHAT IT IS. Life can be pretty obvious and I accept it. I have ringing that is brutal, I accept it. I have fibro/body pain, I accept it. I have pain in my face and head, I accept it. I lost my parents and family, it's very hard but I accept it. Accepting does not mean we give up, in reality it means we WIN. Fighting things all the time, drains your body and mind. For me at least, that's a no win situation. I share this story/post with you because I care for this forum and know a lot of you hurt, just like I do, daily.
We need to at times, go to doctors and get help...I am 100% for that. I am always for seeing a professional and hopefully getting help, so I am all for it. I am probably one of the MOST positive people on this forum and I love helping people. I share my stories, with folks to give you an inspiration and let you know that in life...we can still be positive and encouraging, even when we have a VERY difficult and challenging life. Our attitudes and mindset are what makes us truly unique and special. This was an emotional post for me to write, but If I can help anyone and motivate them, then this post must be seen.
Even with all my hardships, I still look forward to a new day and challenge and love the 1 life I have.
Never give up, in your life and always move forward my friends
***This is post from my life, my point is to hopefully not offend anyone, just to share something that can help you, live a better life***
- Oct 14, 2016
- 1,270
- Tinnitus Since
- All my life, but got worse 2016
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Noise induced / Concert
Sex leads to screams, screams lead to worse T, which leads to flailing and writhing on the floor. No, better to be safe and abstain completely...it will help your T.
I'm with you there brother- sex is a real respite.
It connects mind and body, as does this other wretched piece of shit!!
(...apologies are in order for mere standard pieces of shit.....no offence intended!)
- May 5, 2016
- 2,594
- Tinnitus Since
- 1988
- Cause of Tinnitus
- loud noise and very bad sickness
Acceptance is never about it being easy. Life can still be very difficult, even if we accept what is going on. The acceptance can empower us and unleash that strength that we never though we had before. Today I was thinking of the HELL I have been through, since my mom and dad died almost 5 years ago. I had mild to intrusive tinnitus when they were alive, I had the muscular/bone/auto immune disease when they were alive. Evolution rids me of my parents/family and now the tinnitus is intrusive/scary. The body pain is way worst, things are more intense.
I accept my issues. I accept my challenges. I accept my sacrifices that must be made to make life better for myself and my dogs. I accept it and don't battle my obstacles and not battle my inner soul. These kinds of battles just drain you and in the end THEY win and not us. No matter how hard life is and how bad our back is against the wall, acceptance goes a long way.
I accept my issues, but at the same time I create a life plan... that can help me live a better life. I don't just accept and say "Life I give up". Acceptance is all about not fighting yourself, not fighting at all. Stay calm, understand what is going on and try to make your life better.
Getting all mad and angry will NOT help the tinnitus. Anger and inner conflict can just add stress and stress CAN make tinnitus louder. Stress CAN wreak havoc on the immune system.
I did not think like this in my 20s. As I got older and started getting more and more issues, my way of thinking simply shifted and I am glad I was humbled by my experiences and now I can share it and help people in their lives....
Bless....
- Aug 29, 2015
- 7,069
- Tinnitus Since
- 2004
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Meniere's Disease
@fishbone ,
like yourself life gave me a lot to cope with including Meniere's and sever Bilateral tinnitus.
The times I have felt like giving up and disappearing off the face of the earth just to escape and not to bother family and friends.
We have a right to fight to be happy and grasp every chance as it comes along with both hands.
I am lucky to have a loving close family and grandchildren whom I treasure and I devote my life to supporting Tinnitus Sufferers and Meniere's on and off the forum and Facebook group.
Life with tinnitus can be hell but having support around us is so important and emotional support also to look after our Mental wellbeing.
love glynis
like yourself life gave me a lot to cope with including Meniere's and sever Bilateral tinnitus.
The times I have felt like giving up and disappearing off the face of the earth just to escape and not to bother family and friends.
We have a right to fight to be happy and grasp every chance as it comes along with both hands.
I am lucky to have a loving close family and grandchildren whom I treasure and I devote my life to supporting Tinnitus Sufferers and Meniere's on and off the forum and Facebook group.
Life with tinnitus can be hell but having support around us is so important and emotional support also to look after our Mental wellbeing.
love glynis
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