Tinnitus and Me After 30 Years

[canuhearmenow]

I have drug induced tinnitus and this October with be 30 years since its onset. I remember the day it came on me like it was yesterday and it never left. It ranges from a high-pitched whistle to a hiss, to a combination of both, and at times sounds exactly like the sound Cicada make when they come out.

At first I thought it was a sign I was losing my mind and it worried me quite a bit, but I made the conscious decision early on I was not going to let it get the best of me, was going to go on with my life and that's exactly what I've done. I was not familiar with the term habituate before joining the forums today but that describes it perfectly:

"to accustom (a person, the mind, etc.), as to a particular situation
to cause habituation, physiologically or psychologically."

I told my doctor about it when it first appeared but all he did was look into my ears with his scope and said he couldn't see anything. Personally, I do not have faith in going to the doctor and haven't gone in several years for anything, much less tinnitus.

I've seen ads on TV touting remedies but have never tried any of them or done anything to try to alleviate it. I figured after living with it all these years, what's the point in spending money every month on something I learned to live with years ago?

It hasn't been a bed of roses by any means. The more tired I become the louder it gets and there have been times in the past when I went to bed just to get some relief. There have also been times when I lie down to go to sleep that it's loud enough it prevents me from going to sleep. But these are random events, seldom in nature and the older I get the less it bothers me. Sometimes it is barely noticeable, usually in the mornings and there are times when I realize I haven't been aware it at all, which makes me aware of it again.

I love listening to music and living in an apartment complex I only use headphones to listen to it. I keep my music collection in digital format on my laptops and if I'm online I'm listening to music, as I am now. If I spend several hours it tends to make it louder but only temporarily and I don't see any difference in it the net day. Somebody asked me once why would I do something that made it worse? Because I do not let it rule my life.

I live a normal life in every sense of the word and do not let tinnitus dictate what I can and cannot to, or limit me in any fashion or form. It is no longer an affliction, after 30 years it's become a part of my life. It occupies my ears but it does not occupy my mind. I fully expect it to be with me the rest of my life but it concerns me not in the least.

Don't get me wrong. I'm no pillar of stone. I have feeling and issues just like anyone else. I truly feel empathy for the people I see post about how severely it affects them and especially those who feel they can't go on, which is why I joined the forums. I know none of this make the noise in your head any less severe, but I hope it helps make dealing with it just a little easier.

There is life after tinnitus, it's up to you to make the most of it.

 

[cviechec]

Inspiring, what caused your T? I also have drug induced T, by measly Ibuprofen believe it or not. Not sure I can see myself living 30 years with this shit, maybe I can still hold out hope, even though that might be unhealthy.

 

[canuhearmenow]

Inspiring, what caused your T? I also have drug induced T, by measly Ibuprofen believe it or not. Not sure I can see myself living 30 years with this shit, maybe I can still hold out hope, even though that might be unhealthy.

Let's just say it wasn't Ibuprofen. That part of my life is long since over but I still live with the consequences of my actions all these years later.

I don't know why you would say that holding out hope might be unhealthy. I'm not suggesting they're going to come up with a miracle drug or cure and everything is going to be hunky-dory, but the alternative is defeatism.

Over time it's gotten easier to deal with for me. I can't say it's any less loud than it was 20 years ago, but I can say it's easier to live with.

I was an avid gamer and played in a small room from the time I woke up late into the night till I fell out. After I got really tired it would start to sound like it was echoing off the walls and so loud I would have to go to bed to get some relief, even if I didn't want to stop playing the game.

These days it's not nearly as disruptive to me. I hear it from the time I wake up till I fall asleep in varying, wavering tones and sounds, but like I said, it occupies my ears, not my mind.

I hate to sound like a 12 Step Program, which I hate with a passion, but take it one day at a time. If you can make it through today tomorrow might not be so bad.

 

[threefirefour]

I really wish there was a tag to help separate the habituation stories from actual success stories

 

[Tinker Bell]

I really wish there was a tag to help separate the habituation stories from actual success stories

There isn't because stories of tinnitus actually, 100 percent going away after the initial couple weeks are incredibly rare. I'm familiar with one poster who had it go away after a year, but they're back and dealing with tinnitus again.

 

[alyssalee97]

this was very inspiring! thank you for posting it!!!

 

[robertmaverick]

I have drug induced tinnitus and this October with be 30 years since its onset. I remember the day it came on me like it was yesterday and it never left. It ranges from a high-pitched whistle to a hiss, to a combination of both, and at times sounds exactly like the sound Cicada make when they come out.

At first I thought it was a sign I was losing my mind and it worried me quite a bit, but I made the conscious decision early on I was not going to let it get the best of me, was going to go on with my life and that's exactly what I've done. I was not familiar with the term habituate before joining the forums today but that describes it perfectly:

"to accustom (a person, the mind, etc.), as to a particular situation
to cause habituation, physiologically or psychologically."

I told my doctor about it when it first appeared but all he did was look into my ears with his scope and said he couldn't see anything. Personally, I do not have faith in going to the doctor and haven't gone in several years for anything, much less tinnitus.

I've seen ads on TV touting remedies but have never tried any of them or done anything to try to alleviate it. I figured after living with it all these years, what's the point in spending money every month on something I learned to live with years ago?

It hasn't been a bed of roses by any means. The more tired I become the louder it gets and there have been times in the past when I went to bed just to get some relief. There have also been times when I lie down to go to sleep that it's loud enough it prevents me from going to sleep. But these are random events, seldom in nature and the older I get the less it bothers me. Sometimes it is barely noticeable, usually in the mornings and there are times when I realize I haven't been aware it at all, which makes me aware of it again.

I love listening to music and living in an apartment complex I only use headphones to listen to it. I keep my music collection in digital format on my laptops and if I'm online I'm listening to music, as I am now. If I spend several hours it tends to make it louder but only temporarily and I don't see any difference in it the net day. Somebody asked me once why would I do something that made it worse? Because I do not let it rule my life.

I live a normal life in every sense of the word and do not let tinnitus dictate what I can and cannot to, or limit me in any fashion or form. It is no longer an affliction, after 30 years it's become a part of my life. It occupies my ears but it does not occupy my mind. I fully expect it to be with me the rest of my life but it concerns me not in the least.

Don't get me wrong. I'm no pillar of stone. I have feeling and issues just like anyone else. I truly feel empathy for the people I see post about how severely it affects them and especially those who feel they can't go on, which is why I joined the forums. I know none of this make the noise in your head any less severe, but I hope it helps make dealing with it just a little easier.

There is life after tinnitus, it's up to you to make the most of it.

Thank you! I've been living with tinnitus for some time now, and overall its pretty good, but sometimes I've to remind myself that I just have to live my life and don't let tinnitus dictate what I can and can't do. Inspiring!

 

[threefirefour]

There isn't because stories of tinnitus actually, 100 percent going away after the initial couple weeks are incredibly rare. I'm familiar with one poster who had it go away after a year, but they're back and dealing with tinnitus again.

It gets better all the time though. It often improves a lot after onset. We need a tag for giving up stories or their own section.

 

[canuhearmenow]

I really wish there was a tag to help separate the habituation stories from actual success stories

You've been trolling this site about your dislike of the use of the word habituation since you showed up and have it as your tagline on your profile. Mine is a direct challenge to it.

You think of habituation as giving up. IMO that indicates a serious lack of determination and willpower at your very core, to say the least. I have done anything but give up and have persevered in the face of adversity for the past 30 years without letting it dictate my actions or rule my life and will continue to do so till the day I die.

I've never been to a doctor to seek a cure, other than mentioning it to my General Practitioner at the beginning, and have never used any medications or instruments in an attempt to cure or mask it. It worries me not in the least and I have attained mental mastery over it, something you no doubt will never understand or achieve in any form or fashion.

Giving up IMO would be to commit suicide as you have spoken of as a viable option in another thread. I see that as the ultimate form of saying "I quit", "I'm beat" and "I give up". Mine is a story of dogged determination.

I can understand where other might see it as an end to their misery. I too have considered suicide in the past but it was not due to tinnitus and has never been an option for me no matter what trials and tribulations I've faced, some far more devastating and far reaching than I consider tinnitus to ever have been.

 

[threefirefour]

You've been trolling this site about your dislike of the use of the word habituation since you showed up and have it as your tagline on your profile. Mine is a direct challenge to it.

You think of habituation as giving up. IMO that indicates a serious lack of determination and willpower at your very core, to say the least. I have done anything but give up and have persevered in the face of adversity for the past 30 years without letting it dictate my actions or rule my life and will continue to do so till the day I die.

I've never been to a doctor to seek a cure, other than mentioning it to my General Practitioner at the beginning, and have never used any medications or instruments in an attempt to cure or mask it. It worries me not in the least and I have attained mental mastery over it, something you no doubt will never understand or achieve in any form or fashion.

Giving up IMO would be to commit suicide as you have spoken of as a viable option in another thread. I see that as the ultimate form of saying "I quit", "I'm beat" and "I give up". Mine is a story of dogged determination.

I can understand where other might see it as an end to their misery. I too have considered suicide in the past but it was not due to tinnitus and has never been an option for me no matter what trials and tribulations I've faced, some far more devastating and far reaching than I consider tinnitus to ever have been.

Just because someone doesn't agree with you doesn't mean they're trolling, and yes it's just giving up. I don't see what's hard to see about it. It's just giving up that's being sold as a treatment I wish I were part of a disability community that didn't fall for these scams

And no I don't consider suicide to be giving up, because I consider it a viable option. At least it's doing something. Now you will never see me telling someone to kill themselves or that it's their best option, but I will defend their choice, if that's what they choose, because at least they're doing something about it.

 

[robertmaverick]

Just because someone doesn't agree with you doesn't mean they're trolling, and yes it's just giving up. I don't see what's hard to see about it. It's just giving up that's being sold as a treatment I wish I were part of a disability community that didn't fall for these scams

And no I don't consider suicide to be giving up, because I consider it a viable option. At least it's doing something. Now you will never see me telling someone to kill themselves or that it's their best option, but I will defend their choice, if that's what they choose, because at least they're doing something about it.

Calling suicide a viable option doesn't mean its still giving up. Habituation means fighting, fighting until you realise that you are stronger than your tinnitus. When that happens, you win. Habituation is on the opposite side of the spectrum with regards to giving up. "I don't see what's hard to see about it."

 

[threefirefour]

Calling suicide a viable option doesn't mean its still giving up. Habituation means fighting, fighting until you realise that you are stronger than your tinnitus. When that happens, you win. Habituation is on the opposite side of the spectrum with regards to giving up. "I don't see what's hard to see about it."

Yeah, the fact it's not. It's literally just getting used to it and giving up. I bet if I broke a window and called the shards "diamond dust" if I could sell it to people with tinnitus. Probably, they fall for something similar.

 

[robertmaverick]

Yeah, the fact it's not. It's literally just getting used to it and giving up. I bet if I broke a window and called the shards "diamond dust" if I could sell it to people with tinnitus. Probably, they fall for something similar.

Now you phrase it differently and I've to agree. You get used to it. You give up the emotional resistance. Thats habituation. Well done.

 

[threefirefour]

Now you phrase it differently and I've to agree. You get used to it. You give up the emotional resistance. Thats habituation. Well done.

Now you phrase it differently and I've to agree. You give up the emotional resistance. That's giving up. Well done.

 

[robertmaverick]

Now you phrase it differently and I've to agree. You give up the emotional resistance. That's giving up. Well done.

Giving up the emotional resistance is in no way "giving up" living with tinnitus. Its habituation. You will have normalcy in your life. I'm not really sure what you are set to do. Do you want to live a happy and content life with your tinnitus? Or are you only seeking validation for your pessimistic view?

 

[threefirefour]

Giving up the emotional resistance is in no way "giving up" living with tinnitus. Its habituation. You will have normalcy in your life. I'm not really sure what you are set to do. Do you want to live a happy and content life with your tinnitus? Or are you only seeking validation for your pessimistic view?

Well the former is impossible for me because I'm persistent and I don't need the latter because I know I'm right so neither.

 

[robertmaverick]

Well the former is impossible for me because I'm persistent and I don't need the latter because I know I'm right so neither.

How do you know its impossible for you? So many people succeed in living a happy life. Take the author of this thread for example and there are much more stories out there. So why are you so sure its impossible for you specifically? And in addition to that, if there are so many stories out there how on earth can you be convinced that what you are saying is truth, because it clearly isn't.

 

[threefirefour]

How do you know its impossible for you? So many people succeed in living a happy life. Take the author of this thread for example and there are much more stories out there. So why are you so sure its impossible for you specifically? And in addition to that, if there are so many stories out there how on earth can you be convinced that what you are saying is truth, because it clearly isn't.

I know because I've had it for a year and a half. And how I'm convinced is all those """""success""""" stories are just glorifying giving up, not some sort of magical force that reduces tinnitus. That's why I want a separate tag for them.

 

[robertmaverick]

I know because I've had it for a year and a half. And how I'm convinced is all those """""success""""" stories are just glorifying giving up, not some sort of magical force that reduces tinnitus. That's why I want a separate tag for them.

Habituation to tinnitus takes time. A year and a half might not be enough for you, for some people it happens when they have tinnitus for much longer.

You're not going to find that magical force that reduces your tinnitus. And those success stories are, no matter what, success stories. They are a personal account of people who regained control over their lives. I just can't comprehend how you'd view that as "giving up". They regained control over their lives. How can you rationalise that into giving up? No matter what the cause was for their regained control, whether its a reduced tinnitus volume, habituation or they are just occupied all the time so they don't have time to think about it anymore, its still a success story nonetheless.

P.S. I am pretty sure you are just trolling by now.

 

[threefirefour]

Habituation to tinnitus takes time. A year and a half might not be enough for you, for some people it happens when they have tinnitus for much longer.

You're not going to find that magical force that reduces your tinnitus. And those success stories are, no matter what, success stories. They are a personal account of people who regained control over their lives. I just can't comprehend how you'd view that as "giving up". They regained control over their lives. How can you rationalise that into giving up? No matter what the cause was for their regained control, whether its a reduced tinnitus volume, habituation or they are just occupied all the time so they don't have time to think about it anymore, its still a success story nonetheless.

P.S. I am pretty sure you are just trolling by now.

I'm sure it's not gonna happen. I'm to redpilled about habituation to fall for it.

And again just because I don't agree doesn't mean I'm trolling. Also I don't think these stories should vanish all together (wouldn't mind too much if they did though), but they should have a tag on the side of the story. One that says "habituation" or something so we can see the real successes. That would be great but it probably won't happen.

 

[Paulmanlike]

Careful everybody, he's 20 years old and has had tinnitus for a year and half, you old T veterans could learn something from him.

My dad has tinnitus and he is not arsed about it (can hear everywhere). If a cure came out tomorrow he wouldn't be interested in it. If he's "given up" he hasn't known about it.

 

[threefirefour]

Careful everybody, he's 20 years old and has had tinnitus for a year and half, you old T veterans could learn something from him.

My dad has tinnitus and he is not arsed about it (can hear everywhere). If a cure came out tomorrow he wouldn't be interested in it. If he's "given up" he hasn't known about it.

Aren't you funny. Apparently I'm more clear headed than a lot of the veterans or whatever because I see shit for what it is. I really hope I don't end up like that, I'm trying not to. Your dad did give up at one point, now he probably doesn't care.

 

[Paulmanlike]

Well if he doesn't care now according to you, then maybe giving up is a good option because he doesn't care about it? Because there's no other alternatives apart mine one which I wouldn't recommend to anybody.

 

[threefirefour]

Well if he doesn't care now according to you, then maybe giving up is a good option because he doesn't care about it? Because there's no other alternatives apart mine one which I wouldn't recommend to anybody.

It's not good but it's not the worst. What I hate about it is it implants the idea that giving up is the best way, and actually working towards a cure isn't. In the real world people don't want to give you more than you fight for, especially for tinnitus sufferers, who *really* don't get their fair share. You get what you settle for. If you settle for a scam, you won't get more than a scam. Why do you think most other disorders has been having massive advancements but after 30 years, TRT and it's bottled up quitting have been the best "treatment"? There's a correlation here.

 

[Tinker Bell]

Aren't you funny. Apparently I'm more clear headed than a lot of the veterans or whatever because I see shit for what it is. I really hope I don't end up like that, I'm trying not to. Your dad did give up at one point, now he probably doesn't care.

What exactly are you doing to "not give up" because I'm sincerely curious how that varies from what everyone else with tinnitus is doing?

 

[threefirefour]

What exactly are you doing to "not give up" because I'm sincerely curious how that varies from what everyone else with tinnitus is doing?

Going on these forums and making a point to remind myself everyday that the endgame is to get rid of it, not used to it.

 

[Tinker Bell]

Going on these forums and making a point to remind myself everyday that the endgame is to get rid of it, not used to it.

And how are you planning to get rid of it?

 

[canuhearmenow]

Just because someone doesn't agree with you doesn't mean they're trolling, and yes it's just giving up. I don't see what's hard to see about it. It's just giving up that's being sold as a treatment

I know a troll when I see one. I didn't take issue with your stance on the subject because I knew it was just a matter of time till you showed up in my thread to troll me on it, and here you are.

Nobody sold me anything, neither have I read anywhere that habituation is being sold as a "treatment".

I clearly state that I had never heard the term habituation before joining this site. As far as that goes, this site did not even exist when I made the conscious decision not to let tinnitus get the best of me, so your argument falls short the mark.

I wish I were part of a disability community that didn't fall for these scams

You know how to use google, don't you? And while I'm not a member of any other tinnitus community something tells me this isn't the only one where its members speak of habituation. Your opinion that habituation is a "scam" is exactly that. Opinion. One that is malformed yet one you continue to espouse despite the facts presented.

And no I don't consider suicide to be giving up, because I consider it a viable option. At least it's doing something. Now you will never see me telling someone to kill themselves or that it's their best option, but I will defend their choice, if that's what they choose, because at least they're doing something about it.

You consider ending your life due to tinnitus "doing something about it", but consider making the conscious decision to go on with your life despite tinnitus and not let it limit you giving up?

Clearly, logic and critical thinking are not your strong suit and further discourse with you on the subject would be pointless at best.

Consider yourself ignored.

 

[threefirefour]

And how are you planning to get rid of it?

I don't know. Right now just campaigning for a cure. Was thinking of starting up a tinnitus awareness week or something. I want to get involved in clinical trials but I don't know where to apply.

 

[Paulmanlike]

It's not good but it's not the worst. What I hate about it is it implants the idea that giving up is the best way, and actually working towards a cure isn't. In the real world people don't want to give you more than you fight for, especially for tinnitus sufferers, who *really* don't get their fair share. You get what you settle for. If you settle for a scam, you won't get more than a scam. Why do you think most other disorders has been having massive advancements but after 30 years, TRT and it's bottled up quitting have been the best "treatment"? There's a correlation here.

I agree with you. TRT has only limited evidence of how well it works, and CBT is just another approach to learn how to deal with it. There should be more funding into actually treating this condition now; but nope still tonnes more snake oil on the market. It's sad. Still we get what we settle for; habituation or snake oils.