My mom takes that class of drug for sleep and anxiety(Lamictal); It's been amazing for her; turned everything around. She's had some serious health problems with extreme chronic adrenal fatigue, anxiety, insomnia. But yeah for others it's a nightmare. But that's true with SSRI's also. They have been a God-send to me, but
@Andersson was just rushed to the hospital recently in an ambulance because of a reaction to an SSRI(make sure to give that guy a virtual hug).
Just like everything else in this world, it's a poker decision about the possible outcomes and the liklihood of those outcomes: no guarantees.
It really is a poker decision. I wish I never touched psych meds. I've been burned three times: Wellbutrin causing moderate tinnitus, Lamictal causing severe tinnitus, and then Tegretol bringing back the severe tinnitus after it subsided. Each time a drug caused tinnitus for me the psychiatrist said, "It will go away when you go off the drug." It took one year for it to go away after Lamictal. The other two it didn't go away.
I understand what you're saying
@linearb . I really hope I can recover again, but right now that seems so far away. It's the fucking cycle - tinnitus causes depression which causes tinnitus which causes more depression. It's so hard for me to see what a normal, functioning life would look like. I've had it before, so you would think I would be able to get there again, but I don't know.
Ahh well that makes more sense and I am very sorry to hear. sorry I must of misread because I thought you meant you went back on it recently. If it was the tegretol then I would be very surprised it hadn't diminished with discontinuation.
Like I mentioned in above posts
@Blackbird26 starting Tegretol was the only variable in my life that changed when the tinnitus went out of control. I had already been depressed for three months so I don't simply attribute it to depression, and there were no other changes medication or otherwise in my life except Tegretol.
I do have an interesting hypothesis about why my tinnitus improved a year after taking Lamictal (around December 2014). After having a year of turmoil for most of 2014 for two reasons - my tinnitus and a very toxic, unhealthy relationship - I made several improvements in my life. The relationship ended, I stopped smoking cigarettes, I started eating healthy and going to the gym, and really cut back on drinking. I was feeling better all around but I still had the goddammed tinnitus. I brought up Potiga to my psychiatrist, and she referred me to a neuropsychiatrist (he is a neurologist and a psychiatrist) to discuss Potiga.
I've been to my fair share of therapists but nothing like this guy. He is European, and practices very differently than anyone I've ever experienced. He's very intense and in your face, challenging everything you have to say and making you dig deep. Without realizing it, it turned into therapy with him, even though it was supposed to be a medication consult. He said I should not take Potiga (nor would he write an rx) because so little is known about it. However, in the talk therapy that evolved, some really deep issues came out. It was during this time that my tinnitus subsided. Again, I had made all those healthy changes in my life, but I truly have to wonder whether this intensive therapy with this doctor is what caused my brain to have some kind of shift, taking away the tinnitus.
Needless to say, once the tinnitus returned to the severe level it is now at, the logical conclusion would be to return to this doctor for treatment. Unfortunately, when I terminated with him I left off on a very bad note and I actually insulted him pretty badly. I contacted him this fall, and he met with me once, but then told me he did not have any availability to see me. I think he does have availability, but simply does not want to see me. I could be wrong though.
So I am blaming myself for screwing up the chance to work with this brilliant doctor and trying to replicate the treatment with him as best as possible. I saw two other psychoanalysts (his style of practice) and they were nothing like him. I'm continuing therapy with one of these doctors and he really feels he can help me. He wants to get to the root issues of my self-sabotage and my suffering. But what can he do for my tinnitus? He set me up with an appointment with the "best ENT in the city" but I've already seen every "great ENT" and "tinnitus specialist" in New York. I ended up blowing off the appointment with the ENT but I guess I will reschedule. On one hand it can't hurt, but on the other I will probably leave frustrated, being told for the tenth time, "We don't know why these medications affected you like this."
If I can somehow try and put the tinnitus aside for the moment then maybe I can see a life without depression, and maybe my current doctor can give me that. And then maybe the healthy life will lead to tinnitus improvement. Brain plasticity and all that. I'm still working on getting in with the doctor who probably doesn't want to treat me, having others advocate for me. We'll see how that plays out. But in the meantime I am trying to work on myself because I know I have a lot of issues in addition to tinnitus and depression. I carry around a lot of shame from my childhood, which causes me to experience a lot of anger and aggression, manipulative behavior, substance abuse, and I even exhibit some Cluster B personality disorder traits. But I'm putting all the cards on the table in therapy and working on myself. I'm aware of my problems and am trying to see that tinnitus is just one piece of the puzzle, not my whole life, even if it feels that way.
Thank you all for reading and for your support.
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