I just wanted to write on my own thread that I've decided to go ahead and try antidepressants. Just that I made the decision that I want to try. I still have to make the appt to see the doctor. And likely I'm going to ask for Sertraline/Zoloft (or Lexapro?) because I've taken it before without too many bad side effects plus it may be better to tackle my anxiety + depression combo.
I did a lot of thinking about this for a long time now. I looked up anecdote after anecdote, positive and negative experiences... all it left was the option to try it. That tinnitus is as individual as the person in which it resides. I'm partially influenced by the fact that meds haven't seemed to affect my tinnitus all that much. Found a list of 20 most triggering tinnitus meds from most to least and guess what? I already take a med that is listed as higher than Zoloft. In fact Zoloft is lower on the list than my blood pressure meds I take everyday. So screw it, I'm going to try it. And if for some reason it screws me over and makes me unhappy and worse, I don't want anyone to quote this in the future as a way to scare people off of trying to alleviate their mental anguish.
Truth be told I'm scared as HELL. but I'm ready to finally take care of my mental health. I've reached a point where my anxiety and depression is really just compounding with the tinnitus. So much so that even though my tinnitus is stable and not too bad, and yet all I do is ruminate and agonize over every could be. Constantly worrying about a worsening that hasn't even arrived? I don't know if many of you understand what it's like to be obsessive BEFORE tinnitus - then enter tinnitus. It makes everything much worse. I've had tinnitus for two years with no massive improvement. It's relatively stable. It's not affected by meds from what I can see. I just need to give this a chance and I really hope it pays off.
I'll update here for anyone who is curious how it ends up going. I'm so scared but I guess I'm always scared anyways.