- Feb 9, 2018
- 21
- Tinnitus Since
- Nov 2017
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Not sure possibly stress
Good evening,
I am a dance teacher and I have just come home from work teaching dance for 4 hours, I love my job! Since I have had T since Nov last year as you all well know its been and still is a rollercoaster......I closed my dance school in the first month or so I just couldn't face the kids, then when I reopened I was very wobbly and thought about T all the way through my lessons, dreading turning the music off and hearing the damned noise again but tonight was different and the last couple of weeks have been.
At some points in my classes I not only didn't hear my T but I actually forgot I had it when I was lost in my teaching and demonstrating stuff.. It was really good while it was happening but then the reality hits me everytime I stop or turn the music off...If you saw me teaching dance tonight you would not know I had tinnitus, laughing and joking with the kids, leaping across the studio etc, however, this morning I was crying heavily for ages as I felt so low, helpless and hopeless with this condition and now Im home and my T is loud/intrusive again Im sad again and feeling hopeless and down about it all...
I just don't understand how I can feel so good, not think about it or hear it much while Im teaching then feel so bad and have it my face upsetting me......
I now its a good thing that I can work and I enjoy it but it almost feels like its not real. Am I habituating/recovering/getting better? I pray that I am but sometimes I just feel like Im kidding myself and Im just putting an act on when Im teaching. So confused right now and happy that I have this relief at the same time.
I am a dance teacher and I have just come home from work teaching dance for 4 hours, I love my job! Since I have had T since Nov last year as you all well know its been and still is a rollercoaster......I closed my dance school in the first month or so I just couldn't face the kids, then when I reopened I was very wobbly and thought about T all the way through my lessons, dreading turning the music off and hearing the damned noise again but tonight was different and the last couple of weeks have been.
At some points in my classes I not only didn't hear my T but I actually forgot I had it when I was lost in my teaching and demonstrating stuff.. It was really good while it was happening but then the reality hits me everytime I stop or turn the music off...If you saw me teaching dance tonight you would not know I had tinnitus, laughing and joking with the kids, leaping across the studio etc, however, this morning I was crying heavily for ages as I felt so low, helpless and hopeless with this condition and now Im home and my T is loud/intrusive again Im sad again and feeling hopeless and down about it all...
I just don't understand how I can feel so good, not think about it or hear it much while Im teaching then feel so bad and have it my face upsetting me......
I now its a good thing that I can work and I enjoy it but it almost feels like its not real. Am I habituating/recovering/getting better? I pray that I am but sometimes I just feel like Im kidding myself and Im just putting an act on when Im teaching. So confused right now and happy that I have this relief at the same time.