This is my story of tinnitus and the road to habituation and normality.
I am a Medical Doctor who developed severe tinnitus shortly after commencing the SSRI Lexapro (Escitalopram) after a period of prolonged work stress.
I have no doubt the SSRI precipitated the tinnitus which is backed up by recent studies demonstrating increased serum Serotonin levels having an excitatory effect on the neurons within the Dorsal Cochlear Nucleus which is a known sound processing area in the brain stem that is intimately involved in the generation of the tinnitus perception.
Tinnitus is a reported adverse effect in 1-2% of people on SSRIs and I suspect those that develop tinnitus on SSRIs probably have a genetic predisposition.
My tinnitus started about 5 days after commencing a low dose of Lexapro which I immediately stopped in the hope it would go away. To my dismay and absolute horror, it DIDN'T go away.
My tinnitus is a very loud high pitch electrical sound which is always present. Due to its extremely high frequency, when I choose to hear it (note my choice of word 'choose' which I will elaborate upon later) I can hear it anywhere including on a plane with the engines at full throttle.
My initial reaction to the tinnitus was extremely negative and one verging on panic. I despised the noise and felt my life was ruined. I could not envisage being able to concentrate or enjoy anything with this blaring @@##G constant loud noise in my head. Getting through a day's work was extremely taxing and it was putting great strain on my already fragile mental state and relationships.
My days were spent obsessing over the sound and my already tired mind was working overtime desperate for ways to make the sound stop. It was 24/24 torture with no respite. Believe me over a 12 month period, I tried everything including Mindfulness (this was excruciating especially in a quiet room!), Professional CBT, Psychotherapy, various supplements, DIY Acoustic Modulation Reset, EFT Tapping (Yes – I tried this!) and Hearing aids with white noise. My whole life revolved around trying to get this noise to stop.
By the 12-18 month mark, I was mentally and physically EXHAUSTED. I guess you could call it Capitulation where I had tried absolutely everything to no avail. The tinnitus was still there as loud and high pitched as ever.
In hindsight, the capitulation phase ended up being the turning point. It was essentially where my mind became truly resigned there was NOTHING I could do to make the tinnitus go away. I was exhausted and had nothing left to fight. I pretty much SURRENDERED to the tinnitus. I was at the lowest of lows and it was the darkest of all dark periods in my life.
Following Capitulation, I learnt to ACCEPT the tinnitus was here to stay and this was the beginning of my recovery. The path was not easy with many ups and downs but slowly but surely I spent less of the day obsessing about the tinnitus and started to experience short periods of the day where I didn't notice the tinnitus. Seconds of not noticing the tinnitus became minutes which became hours. You get the idea.
Today, 4 years later I still am conscious of the tinnitus at times during the day especially in a quiet environment however because it doesn't elicit any emotional reaction, I get on with what I'm doing and before I know it, I have forgotten about it and don't even know its there. I can divert my attention and choose not to hear it.
I have realized with the aid of time that tinnitus is not a disability or a life sentence and as others have said it's just a part of me. It does not stop me from doing anything I want to do or enjoying the things I like to do.
It's funny when you finally reach this mindset and make peace with your tinnitus, it paradoxically becomes less intrusive and you don't even notice for most of the day as your mind is focusing on other things and getting on with life. Rather than looking inwards, your mind starts to look outwards again and life becomes as good or better than before tinnitus.
I never thought it would happen to me but I guess that is what is called habituation.
Some Tips that I have learnt along the way to help those that are struggling –
1. Time and keeping busy
Time is perhaps the most important healer of all. Be patient and kind to yourself. It takes time for your mind and body to come to terms with this new foreign intruder. Habituation will happen. Try and keep yourself busy and don't withdraw from life. Keep going to work, keep going out with friends, keep doing the things you used to enjoy, no matter how hard. The more you can keep your mind occupied, the less time it has to focus on the tinnitus and the more the tinnitus will be pushed back into the background. It is very hard at first but you have to keep persisting. I didn't think I would be able to play competitive tennis as I didn't think I would be able to concentrate. It's no problem at all. I don't even notice the tinnitus when I play now as I am 100% focused on the match.
2. Background Sound
Good for quiet environment e.g., Bedroom at home. Invest in a small Bluetooth speaker or radio. Play some pleasant soft background sounds eg. running stream or soothing music. This helps your mind refocus away from the tinnitus and listen to something else and is all part of the Habituation process. I still play the sound of a running stream when I go to sleep to take the edge of the tinnitus but I really can sleep without it nowadays.
3. Listen to Music via Headphones before bed.
After long and exhausting days struggling with the tinnitus, I found some respite lying in bed with headphones listening to some soothing music. The music drowns out the tinnitus and if you start focusing on the music, you quickly forget about the tinnitus. This was invaluable in the first 12 months as it gave me some respite from the 24/24 sound and calmed me down before sleeping.
4. Swimming
I found swimming very useful. Try to swim 30 minutes every day if possible. With all the sounds of the water, I would lose the tinnitus perception and get some respite. I also found exercise very therapeutic and certainly helped decrease my arousal levels and calm my sympathetic nervous system. I felt more chilled after each swim and it just helped me cope better.
5. Reading success stories on Tinnitus Talk
I found reading's peoples experiences with tinnitus and how they got through it very useful and gave me hope to hang in there during the dark times. Billie48's 'From Darkness to light' is particularly inspiring and I would have this printed out and read this a lot during my difficult days – Thank you Billie48.
Be mindful however to not spend countless hours on the forum as the more you are reading and thinking about tinnitus, the more your mind is focusing on the tinnitus and not learning to put it into the background / subconscious.
6. Arches Tinnitus Formula
It appears people have variable success with this supplement (Ginkgo Biloba extract, Zinc and Garlic). I gave this a go and still take it twice a day. I'm not sure whether it's just a placebo effect but it may have decreased the intensity of the tinnitus by 10-20%. I probably can do without it now.
7. Try and think positive
I didn't think I would ever come to terms with my tinnitus or ever live a happy normal life again. Keep telling yourself no matter how bad things may seem, that you will get better. You just have to give yourself time to heal and for your mind to adjust.
I sincerely hope all of the above has been of some use to those tinnitus sufferers out there and as my username states 'You Can do It!'
I am a Medical Doctor who developed severe tinnitus shortly after commencing the SSRI Lexapro (Escitalopram) after a period of prolonged work stress.
I have no doubt the SSRI precipitated the tinnitus which is backed up by recent studies demonstrating increased serum Serotonin levels having an excitatory effect on the neurons within the Dorsal Cochlear Nucleus which is a known sound processing area in the brain stem that is intimately involved in the generation of the tinnitus perception.
Tinnitus is a reported adverse effect in 1-2% of people on SSRIs and I suspect those that develop tinnitus on SSRIs probably have a genetic predisposition.
My tinnitus started about 5 days after commencing a low dose of Lexapro which I immediately stopped in the hope it would go away. To my dismay and absolute horror, it DIDN'T go away.
My tinnitus is a very loud high pitch electrical sound which is always present. Due to its extremely high frequency, when I choose to hear it (note my choice of word 'choose' which I will elaborate upon later) I can hear it anywhere including on a plane with the engines at full throttle.
My initial reaction to the tinnitus was extremely negative and one verging on panic. I despised the noise and felt my life was ruined. I could not envisage being able to concentrate or enjoy anything with this blaring @@##G constant loud noise in my head. Getting through a day's work was extremely taxing and it was putting great strain on my already fragile mental state and relationships.
My days were spent obsessing over the sound and my already tired mind was working overtime desperate for ways to make the sound stop. It was 24/24 torture with no respite. Believe me over a 12 month period, I tried everything including Mindfulness (this was excruciating especially in a quiet room!), Professional CBT, Psychotherapy, various supplements, DIY Acoustic Modulation Reset, EFT Tapping (Yes – I tried this!) and Hearing aids with white noise. My whole life revolved around trying to get this noise to stop.
By the 12-18 month mark, I was mentally and physically EXHAUSTED. I guess you could call it Capitulation where I had tried absolutely everything to no avail. The tinnitus was still there as loud and high pitched as ever.
In hindsight, the capitulation phase ended up being the turning point. It was essentially where my mind became truly resigned there was NOTHING I could do to make the tinnitus go away. I was exhausted and had nothing left to fight. I pretty much SURRENDERED to the tinnitus. I was at the lowest of lows and it was the darkest of all dark periods in my life.
Following Capitulation, I learnt to ACCEPT the tinnitus was here to stay and this was the beginning of my recovery. The path was not easy with many ups and downs but slowly but surely I spent less of the day obsessing about the tinnitus and started to experience short periods of the day where I didn't notice the tinnitus. Seconds of not noticing the tinnitus became minutes which became hours. You get the idea.
Today, 4 years later I still am conscious of the tinnitus at times during the day especially in a quiet environment however because it doesn't elicit any emotional reaction, I get on with what I'm doing and before I know it, I have forgotten about it and don't even know its there. I can divert my attention and choose not to hear it.
I have realized with the aid of time that tinnitus is not a disability or a life sentence and as others have said it's just a part of me. It does not stop me from doing anything I want to do or enjoying the things I like to do.
It's funny when you finally reach this mindset and make peace with your tinnitus, it paradoxically becomes less intrusive and you don't even notice for most of the day as your mind is focusing on other things and getting on with life. Rather than looking inwards, your mind starts to look outwards again and life becomes as good or better than before tinnitus.
I never thought it would happen to me but I guess that is what is called habituation.
Some Tips that I have learnt along the way to help those that are struggling –
1. Time and keeping busy
Time is perhaps the most important healer of all. Be patient and kind to yourself. It takes time for your mind and body to come to terms with this new foreign intruder. Habituation will happen. Try and keep yourself busy and don't withdraw from life. Keep going to work, keep going out with friends, keep doing the things you used to enjoy, no matter how hard. The more you can keep your mind occupied, the less time it has to focus on the tinnitus and the more the tinnitus will be pushed back into the background. It is very hard at first but you have to keep persisting. I didn't think I would be able to play competitive tennis as I didn't think I would be able to concentrate. It's no problem at all. I don't even notice the tinnitus when I play now as I am 100% focused on the match.
2. Background Sound
Good for quiet environment e.g., Bedroom at home. Invest in a small Bluetooth speaker or radio. Play some pleasant soft background sounds eg. running stream or soothing music. This helps your mind refocus away from the tinnitus and listen to something else and is all part of the Habituation process. I still play the sound of a running stream when I go to sleep to take the edge of the tinnitus but I really can sleep without it nowadays.
3. Listen to Music via Headphones before bed.
After long and exhausting days struggling with the tinnitus, I found some respite lying in bed with headphones listening to some soothing music. The music drowns out the tinnitus and if you start focusing on the music, you quickly forget about the tinnitus. This was invaluable in the first 12 months as it gave me some respite from the 24/24 sound and calmed me down before sleeping.
4. Swimming
I found swimming very useful. Try to swim 30 minutes every day if possible. With all the sounds of the water, I would lose the tinnitus perception and get some respite. I also found exercise very therapeutic and certainly helped decrease my arousal levels and calm my sympathetic nervous system. I felt more chilled after each swim and it just helped me cope better.
5. Reading success stories on Tinnitus Talk
I found reading's peoples experiences with tinnitus and how they got through it very useful and gave me hope to hang in there during the dark times. Billie48's 'From Darkness to light' is particularly inspiring and I would have this printed out and read this a lot during my difficult days – Thank you Billie48.
Be mindful however to not spend countless hours on the forum as the more you are reading and thinking about tinnitus, the more your mind is focusing on the tinnitus and not learning to put it into the background / subconscious.
6. Arches Tinnitus Formula
It appears people have variable success with this supplement (Ginkgo Biloba extract, Zinc and Garlic). I gave this a go and still take it twice a day. I'm not sure whether it's just a placebo effect but it may have decreased the intensity of the tinnitus by 10-20%. I probably can do without it now.
7. Try and think positive
I didn't think I would ever come to terms with my tinnitus or ever live a happy normal life again. Keep telling yourself no matter how bad things may seem, that you will get better. You just have to give yourself time to heal and for your mind to adjust.
I sincerely hope all of the above has been of some use to those tinnitus sufferers out there and as my username states 'You Can do It!'
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