MemberThe thing I hate most about tinnitus is feeling "alone". When I say alone, I mean the feeling you get when no one else understands what your going through. I understand that we are a minority and aren't well know and that it is hard for people to understand something they haven't experienced. I just wish it was more well known and would be take more seriously when we express to someone our medical condition.
If I had a broken leg and I said, "I can't go running." They would see the broken leg, understand why, be sympathetic and then move on. When you try to explain tinnitus to someone the majority of people will not really understand what exactly it is. Sometimes they will wonder why a ringing noise would bother you so much or they will not understand what ringing in your ears has to do with not being able to be around loud noises. If they are close friends or family members, eventually they can get upset with your absence or inability to do things. For some reason when people get upset about our disability it makes it hurt a little more than usual. We didn't ask to get this and it doesn't feel good to feel as though it's our fault for trying to stay healthy.
The reason I am writing this is because today I feel very alone. Long story short I am on my vacation and we were going to meet up with some extended family. My one condition with my SO was that I would like to avoid places with excessive noise and live music. She somewhat understands my condition and agreed this was reasonable. Unfortunately the extended family wanted to meet at a location that has live music. I debated risking it with ear plugs, but realized that the only person who is going to look out for myself is me. So I declined going but recommended my SO go so she can see her family. Obviously this didn't go over too well between us, but in the end we both understood how we were feeling.
As I type this I sit alone in car while the world continues to move on without me. I know many of us experience this, but for some reason today the sting is more painful than usual. I wish more people understood the seriousness of our illness and were more sympathetic. This is very serious and very life changing. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.
I know no one has answers to my sorrow, but it makes me feel better knowing that someone somewhere at least knows what it's like to feel this "alone". I'm going to go back to watching the trees blow in the wind and try to think of better things to cheer myself up.
I apologize for the length of post. I hope everyone else's day / weekend is going better than mine.
Jack
If I had a broken leg and I said, "I can't go running." They would see the broken leg, understand why, be sympathetic and then move on. When you try to explain tinnitus to someone the majority of people will not really understand what exactly it is. Sometimes they will wonder why a ringing noise would bother you so much or they will not understand what ringing in your ears has to do with not being able to be around loud noises. If they are close friends or family members, eventually they can get upset with your absence or inability to do things. For some reason when people get upset about our disability it makes it hurt a little more than usual. We didn't ask to get this and it doesn't feel good to feel as though it's our fault for trying to stay healthy.
The reason I am writing this is because today I feel very alone. Long story short I am on my vacation and we were going to meet up with some extended family. My one condition with my SO was that I would like to avoid places with excessive noise and live music. She somewhat understands my condition and agreed this was reasonable. Unfortunately the extended family wanted to meet at a location that has live music. I debated risking it with ear plugs, but realized that the only person who is going to look out for myself is me. So I declined going but recommended my SO go so she can see her family. Obviously this didn't go over too well between us, but in the end we both understood how we were feeling.
As I type this I sit alone in car while the world continues to move on without me. I know many of us experience this, but for some reason today the sting is more painful than usual. I wish more people understood the seriousness of our illness and were more sympathetic. This is very serious and very life changing. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.
I know no one has answers to my sorrow, but it makes me feel better knowing that someone somewhere at least knows what it's like to feel this "alone". I'm going to go back to watching the trees blow in the wind and try to think of better things to cheer myself up.
I apologize for the length of post. I hope everyone else's day / weekend is going better than mine.
Jack
