16 Years Old

[Snake Plissken]

Real bummer. I'm 16, had tinnitus for 6ish months now. I felt like I had habituated for a few months but by fuck has it got worse recently. I have it in both, but my right ear has been going crazy for a month.

To be honest suicide is looking more and more appealing...

 

[citigirl13]

Hey @Snake Plissken. Please don't do anything stupid - I think we have all gotten to the point where we think about suicide. But if anything T made me realise that I did NOT want to commit suicide. I would only do it because of T, and for me it wasn't worth leaving my friends and family.

I know it sucks that you are 16 and having to go through this when usually it is something that older people deal with - but the good news is you are ONLY 16. Since you're young your body has a good chance of healing and the T getting better. Hopefully this spike will just be temporary and it will get better.

Can I ask, do you know how you got your T in the first place?

 

[RaZaH]

Yeah , I guess suicide occurs to a lot of us during the adjustment period.
But that would be stupid and pointless and you have your whole life in front of you.
Besides, they might come up with a cure the day after ...now that would suck !
Life insists on teaching us all kinds of lessons....Stay strong ! It will get better !

 

[Snake Plissken]

@citigirl13
No idea how I got it. Just happened. Hearing is perfect for someone of my age. No loud bangs or head injury. Noticed it at night, quietly for a few months, then one night in September it boomed and I hear it all the time. Having no one to relate to definitely sucks hard.

@RaZaH
That's what terrifies me... I have my whole life ahead of me...

 

[RaZaH]

Yeah I get it , same here . Its been 2 years for me and its been hard ..even terrifying at times but I have definitely learned that I can enjoy life to the fullest with this condition. I might even appreciate life just a tiny bit more than I did before.
It's certainly not a pleasurable experience but an experience nonetheless and that is indeed what shapes us.
I am a stronger person now and if this crap would stop tomorrow I would be thankful for the experience..
It's hard to think like that I have to admit but again, one of the things I have learned thanks to this T crap.
Stay strong, you will get through this ! You are young so in fact it might stop tomorrow ?

 

[citigirl13]

@Snake Plissken - that sucks. Sometimes it is even worse when you don't know what caused it, because you have no answers.

Hopefully it will go back down to normal again. After all, if it was once, why can't it again? Never give up hope. There are stories where T goes away after two or three years. And the chances of getting use to it i.e. habituating to it, are even greater. I first thought I will NEVER get used to it - and while I would love it to go, I am getting used to it. You habituated to the new tone before - there is every reason that you will get used to it again.

Never give up. No matter what happens things will get better. Unfortunately they just have to suck for a little while before they do.

 

[Snake Plissken]

I don't think it will just stop
Really I am not optimistic for a "cure" either. Seriously, I may be wrong, but a tinnitus cure seems like never never land. There are articles from the 90s saying that a cure is 5-10 years away... It's always 5-10 years away.

 

[tom68]

Yeah I know but here's one true story. When I got it my missus was on the phone to her dad telling him and he goes yeah I've had that for 20 years. Turns out for the first few months, maybe more, he was like all of us, life was just ruined. Now he says more often than not he can't hear it ( as in it's not there, not he doesn't care about it) and when it is there it doesn't bother him. I reckon for most something similar happens - the only other person I've met who had it since I got it said hers was pretty much better now, just a low hiss which she can only hear in a silent room. Now I know we aren't all so lucky but that's the only two I've spoken to in person so there has to be a fair chance yours will get much better and neither of them did any kind of coping strategy beyond playing sound to get to sleep.

 

[citigirl13]

I don't think it will just stop
Really I am not optimistic for a "cure" either. Seriously, I may be wrong, but a tinnitus cure seems like never never land. There are articles from the 90s saying that a cure is 5-10 years away... It's always 5-10 years away.

It might take time - like I said, sometimes people have had it for a few years (someone had it for sixteen years before it stopped) but it can stop. I personally know someone who had T for some months, and it went away for her. It was caused by a virus, and she said that it sounded like "a generator". But she said she just "lived with it" and went fitted it in with her life. She sounded so calm about it. And she said one night she realised she couldn't hear it. So it can go.

Personally I don't know about a cure (they believe T is the noise we get from our brain which is completely natural, so I don't know how they would cure it) - but I believe there will be a treatment that can help lower the volume. Seriously, if the volume of mine was reduced by even 50%, I probably wouldn't be able to hear it. People are working on treatments and there are some positive results, so fingers crossed a treatment will come soon.

Stay strong! Keep positive - positive thinking really does help.

 

[gary]

Real bummer. I'm 16, had tinnitus for 6ish months now. I felt like I had habituated for a few months but by fuck has it got worse recently. I have it in both, but my right ear has been going crazy for a month.

To be honest suicide is looking more and more appealing...

Many peoples lives have been affected by a movie they have seen, be it fiction or not. Obviously the Escape movies (my favorites too) are ones you enjoy I take it, as you have Snake Plissken for your avitar. Fiction or not, think "what would Snake do" Suicide, I don't think so, would he rather have tinnitus than just one eye, I don't think he would even care. This analogy may seem silly or illogical to some, but many movies have inspired people to look at or do things differently, including me...

 

[awbw8]

@Snake Plissken , I am going to echo others here and say please do not do anything desperate.

In the beginning, like many, I envisioned quite clearly how I would end things, I could see no other escape. I'm only a decade older than you, 26, and believe me, your entire life with tinnitus from 26 still looks like a very, very long time when you're in the beginning stages and every millisecond is unimaginable torture.

However, the truth is, you've only had it for a short amount of time. You absolutely can get better without the tinnitus itself going away. The only damaging part of tinnitus in terms of living your life is the anxiety ascribed to it. That anxiety is part "in your head" and part literally in your head - it will take time for your brain to adjust to the sound being something it can push into the background. For me it took nearly a year, but it happened (and is still happening).

I know it's hard to believe that anyone here "knows how you feel" and of course, we're all different and we do not collectively or individually know how you specifically feel. But know that, speaking for myself, I was in the worst imaginable state a year ago - my mother had to fly 3,000 miles to where I live to take care of me because she was so worried I was going to end things. I wasn't eating, I couldn't sleep, every single second of every single day was hell. Everything around me was a reminder of how just on the other side of some invisible border was my old, quiet life. All of that has faded though. You have to grieve, but eventually, with time and some work on your part, you can go back to a very happy life. You wont be the same, but there's the potential to be better, or one of us annoying old-timers on tinnitus boards pulling new sufferers back from the edge with our tales of the trenches of the first few weeks/months/years.

You will be okay, but give yourself time, reach out to your loved ones, find a good and caring psychiatrist, get sleep (with medical help from a professional if necessary - the need for meds will fade), and choose to live. You will be happy you did later.

I see Sunday was your last post, I hope you're okay right now. My heart goes out to you *hugs*.