4 and a Bit Months...

[AuntSally]

Hello everyone! I have had tinnitus for 4 and a bit months now. It started with just a hiss in my right ear and a feeling of blockage. It got louder! and louder! - to the point it was like the whole side of my head was vibrating! And then I got stressed (hard not to) as things went from bad to worse. There's also a rhythmic pulsating hiss along with the normal hiss. I found out that's called pulsatile tinnitus. I think I might have had that on and off before. Maybe years. But it never bothered me. It's there all the time now.

My left ear started too - on and off - at some point but it's not as bad as the right ear and there's a pulsating hiss sort of sound on exercise, which is higher pitched and more piercing than the right side which is softer; and if I force my head down and press behind my ear I can make that go away. Maybe stress-related. The right ear can get very LOUD though and it scares me when that happens and I don't know what to do with myself. And sometimes I get on and off static sounds and rhythmic hissing I'm not sure exactly the location. But I think that's when I'm stressed and my blood pressure goes up. Don't know really. It's a mess and I never know what's going to happen next.

I've been to docs, ENT and so on and had a MRI scan. Various possible diagnoses - Meniere's disease? (I don't have vertigo), vestibular neuritis? (could be) labrynthitis? migraine associated vertigo? (yes, I don't have vertigo). I don't think my ENT really knows what the cause is. Do they ever? From my own researches I think it sounds like endolymphatic hydrops - at least on the right side. I'm seeing ENT again in December... and I'm seeing Audiology v. soon for an open fit hearing aid for the right. Don't know if that will help any.

At any rate...

Stressed!
Anxiety! All day anxiety. Although I usually get evenings off from that strangely. Weird how it ebbs away in the evenings.
And insomnia. The insomnia freaks me out.

Three things at once is just too much to cope with.

It was 4 months insomnia that drove me to seek medical help and I just started taking an antidepressant 2 weeks ago, which I hate. And since then I'm thinking this is not the way to go and I don't really want to continue taking it much longer. But for now its helped me sleep a bit more and catch up.

I know where I want to be with this from reading a lot on this forum, and the success stories and positivity thread, and taking heart from people like @billie48 and @Karen and @glynis . Thank you for your stories. They have helped a lot.

But I feel stuck. I know it takes time. But I'm really stuck. And I hate the antidepressant thing, which is making me feel more stuck. My former me has gone and I'm just a mess. I don't want to be like this.

Much love to everyone out there who is dealing with this too. As I've read somewhere else "they can land a man on the moon but they can't cure tinnitus" (or something like that). I do hope there is something that comes out of research soon. Research in this area has obviously been much neglected.

Aunty Sally

(I'm in Scotland btw. Anyone else here from Scotland?)

 

[volsung37]

Not too far away - north of Ireland. The first months of Tinnitus are horrendous for most people. There is not a lot you can do. Meds can be very useful at this point especially for sleeping. Once you get the sleep under control you may find things getting a lot easier - I did anyway. I used phenergan to get to sleep. Non addictive and effective for me. I tried anti-depressants but they didn't agree with me. Try to de-stress your life as much as possible in the fields of work and social commitments. Once you get over the next couple of months things should improve. I have a lot of the T symptoms you mention. They haven't really got quieter but I don't seem to mind them as much now. Good luck!

 

[glynis]

Hi Aunt Sally,
Welcome to Tinnitus Talk.
Antidepressants usually take 2 weeks from side effects to start being therapeutic and can help lift your mood and at a low dose help sleep that is really needed if you struggle to sleep.
Sleeping tablets can help but not always work and only like you have them short term.
The early months with tinnitus is when we get all the emotional responses and anxiety is not a nice thing.
Meds,exercise,rest,sleep,relaxation,relaxing baths can help
Blood pressure can increase tinnitus so with your doctors help see what you can do to lower it a little as might help.
You have found the best ever forum and will get lots of support.
Check out any tinnitus support groups near you too.
I'm from Stoke on Trent....lots of love glynis

 

[Dominic1955]

Hello everyone! I have had tinnitus for 4 and a bit months now. It started with just a hiss in my right ear and a feeling of blockage. It got louder! and louder! - to the point it was like the whole side of my head was vibrating! And then I got stressed (hard not to) as things went from bad to worse. There's also a rhythmic pulsating hiss along with the normal hiss. I found out that's called pulsatile tinnitus. I think I might have had that on and off before. Maybe years. But it never bothered me. It's there all the time now.

My left ear started too - on and off - at some point but it's not as bad as the right ear and there's a pulsating hiss sort of sound on exercise, which is higher pitched and more piercing than the right side which is softer; and if I force my head down and press behind my ear I can make that go away. Maybe stress-related. The right ear can get very LOUD though and it scares me when that happens and I don't know what to do with myself. And sometimes I get on and off static sounds and rhythmic hissing I'm not sure exactly the location. But I think that's when I'm stressed and my blood pressure goes up. Don't know really. It's a mess and I never know what's going to happen next.

I've been to docs, ENT and so on and had a MRI scan. Various possible diagnoses - Meniere's disease? (I don't have vertigo), vestibular neuritis? (could be) labrynthitis? migraine associated vertigo? (yes, I don't have vertigo). I don't think my ENT really knows what the cause is. Do they ever? From my own researches I think it sounds like endolymphatic hydrops - at least on the right side. I'm seeing ENT again in December... and I'm seeing Audiology v. soon for an open fit hearing aid for the right. Don't know if that will help any.

At any rate...

Stressed!
Anxiety! All day anxiety. Although I usually get evenings off from that strangely. Weird how it ebbs away in the evenings.
And insomnia. The insomnia freaks me out.

Three things at once is just too much to cope with.

It was 4 months insomnia that drove me to seek medical help and I just started taking an antidepressant 2 weeks ago, which I hate. And since then I'm thinking this is not the way to go and I don't really want to continue taking it much longer. But for now its helped me sleep a bit more and catch up.

I know where I want to be with this from reading a lot on this forum, and the success stories and positivity thread, and taking heart from people like @billie48 and @Karen and @glynis . Thank you for your stories. They have helped a lot.

But I feel stuck. I know it takes time. But I'm really stuck. And I hate the antidepressant thing, which is making me feel more stuck. My former me has gone and I'm just a mess. I don't want to be like this.

Much love to everyone out there who is dealing with this too. As I've read somewhere else "they can land a man on the moon but they can't cure tinnitus" (or something like that). I do hope there is something that comes out of research soon. Research in this area has obviously been much neglected.

Aunty Sally

(I'm in Scotland btw. Anyone else here from Scotland?)

I think what you are feeling is a normal response to T, I have it forv7 months, first 4 months felt like hell! I was seriously thinking about suicide!
I did have severe sudden hearing loss in my lt ear with infernal T. Could not sleep and I stopped working for about 6 weeks. I did see ENT had MRI etc normal . Then suddenly my anxiety was gone and I was able to concentrate. I am still having hearing loss and T but it's manageable.
I do take a sleeping pill. Time will help you but the first 6 months are hell !
Dom

 

[Kazue]

Hello Aunt Sally! (I'm old enough to be your niece hehe, I'm still a child.)

Let me tell you, the first year of T is ROUGH. No sleep, getting panic attacks, constant worrying, I get it. I literally cry everyday of the week because of anxiety. Plus I'm still in school so the homework tends to stress me out. The beginning of this week, I realize I can tune out my T. I don't hear it until I'm going to bed. Doesn't bother me anymore. Tinnitus feeds on fear and anxiety so let that devil starve. What helps me is being around my love ones. Don't choose a loud event like a restaurant because you'll be reminded of T when you have to put your earplugs in. Maybe try a short jog with your close ones. Maybe go out to a cafe and read a book. I suffer from panic attacks every day of the week and I don't want to be put on medication. So I'm trying natural ways to boost up my happy levels before I have to. Living with T is such a long journey with many unexpected turns. Just have to learn how to not freak out about it.

 

[Belle4412]

In the same boat .... & new here .... mine T kicked up a gear ... just after my cat unexpectedly died ... so I feel my T is linked to the emotional side of my brain ... it's hard to find strength ... its noise torture .. & I've never felt so tired .. but Ive found distractions can work ..... I received my welcome note from T Talk ... & can say I can kick myself sometimes ... when I'm able to ignore it ... & then wonder where it is ... & stupidly I've opened that door ... & T is back.

Thank you @Kazue for sharing your story ... your words are an inspiration!

 

[Dante500]

I've been there, everyone of us have. Iv'e taken xanax, relanium and a whole lot of other drugs during my first year, life was hell on earth. But let me tell you this - 4 months is still a too short a time for your brain to start 'fighting' the T. I call it fighting because it kinda looks like it. Your brain gradually 'evolves' and SLOWLY starts treating the noise like a normal thing. Right now, the noise in your ears is something new and your brain is treating it like it was danger, it responds with anxiety and doesn't know whats going on. Your brain 'thinks' it can harm you, that's why you have such negative feeling towards it and want it to stop. After a time (every person is different and that time can vary from person to person) your brain will start adapting to the noise and will start to 'calm down' as it will slowly realize that it does not do any harm to you. And since it does not do any harm, there is no need for your brain to be in constant 'alert' mode. This is when the magic happens. Eventually your brain will completely stop treating the T noise as 'hostile'. This means that while the noise will still be there, you will just stop noticing it. It will become something that is completely normal for you and will stop affecting your mood in any way. This happened to me, to the point that if someone asked me if I would want my T to be romoved forever I would say "nah, don't bother". It is amazing how much our perception of things can change over time.

The noise will not go away, but let me tell you this - it will make you a LOT stronger. You can cope with T = you can take anything that life throws at you. Coping with T requires TREMENDOUS effort, focus, commitment and sheer will. Just to get through the day. But in the end, it leaves you a better, stronger, more powerful person. It had a very positive effect on my life in the long run. Ask any T 'veteran', he will tell you the same.

 

[Belle4412]

Thank you @Dante500 !!!

 

[MikeL1972]

Hi Sally,

Welcome to the site.

From reading your post, you are trying to fight T head-on and that is a big mistake. The whole key to managing this condition is to learn how to cope with it. Just gradually give in to it and over time, your nervous system will relax and similarly, your brain will file it into the "unimportant" category. The technical term for this is called "habituation".

Based on stats, countless millions in the USA alone have tinnitus, so know that you are not alone!

 

[Karen]

Hi, @AuntSally,

Welcome to Tinnitus Talk; I'm so glad you've joined us! After reading your post, I can totally relate to what you're going through, and I sympathize. Some of the other posters are right that tinnitus is at its worst right at first, and does improve with time. I had the feeling of fullness, the feeling of my head vibrating, lack of sleep, vertigo, etc., etc., right at first, but things have improved so much now that I am able to live with it.

For me, learning how to relax and keep my blood pressure low really helped, as did taking calming natural supplements such as magnesium. I still take magnesium once a day, at night, to help me sleep. I had a lot of tests for my pulsatile tinnitus, too, and the doctors never truly found a cause. You were wise to get tested, just to be sure there are no major problems, such as a fistula, etc. I'll be interested to hear what your doctor has to say when you return to him, and hope he is able to give you some answers. If not, you could always consider circulating your scans to other doctors or specialists, such as neurotologists, to see if they can see anything different in them.

I believe that things will begin to improve for you with time, but in the meantime, try to find ways to keep yourself as calm and distracted as possible. Easier said than done, I know, but that was the best therapy for me, in the long run.

Please do update us when you hear back from your doctor, on what he finds. Also, I'll be interested to hear how the hearing aids work for you. That may make a big difference in the way you are able to cope.

Take care, and please send me a message if you'd like to discuss.

Best wishes and hugs,
Karen

 

[billie48]

Welcome to the forum and it is nice to know some of our success stories have helped you. At this new stage of your T, it is understandable that you will have quite a bit of anxiety. The limbic nervous system may still be in control and the Amygdala processing the T stimulus will make things worse than it is. Try to do some relaxing or interesting activities to help calm the brain, as anxiety and stress are what T needs as a fuel to perpetuate its tyranny over us. You may try some of these natural alternatives for stress relief and insomnia, even depression, thing such:
Lemon Balm, Valerian, Hops, Catnips, Passion Flower, Chamomile, Lavender, Kava, Melatonin etc. You can google search each of them to know their use and see if you can take them as a supplement. Check out this site on using natural herbs for helping to sleep or to calm the nerves. Yes, give your body time to heal. Take good care. God bless.

http://www.christopherhobbs.com/lib...ealth/herbs-and-natural-remedies-for-insomnia/