Backsliding After Continued Loud Noises at Work

[dan]

But I seemed to manage until the past couple months were it seemed to become reactive to noise, such as driving on the freeway, or it is simply so loud I clearly hear it all the time. Either way, I am cursing this tinnitus every waking moment of the day now.

Would you be so kind as to clarify how your tinnitus is different now.

i.e. your older post says you heard it everywhere except the shower as well, but you habituated eventually.

Perhaps you can habituate yet again? Is there a line where one cannot habituate any longer?

 

[astaff14]

I feel so bad for you as controlling your environment is so important with this awful condition. I was walking out of a market today when a worker slammed a bunch of shopping carts together. I said to my wife why people have to be so loud, and she reminded me it is our responsibility to protect ourselves. They are just doing normal things. As bad as it sounds, she is correct. My tinnitus has ramped up to levels I never thought I could bear. I struggle massively. This is why I am up at 2 am writing. All I can say, is take care of yourself and create an environment as best you can for your health and longevity. Boyfriend included! My T has been continually ramping up over the past several years, and I can't seem to do anything about it. I have custom earplugs with me all the time and probably use them 20 times a day whenever I think there is a risk to high sound levels. I do not leave them in all the time with all the advice we need to keep hearing safe levels of sounds. The custom plugs are really small and easy to insert. They have a little tail on them so you can pull them out slightly when talking to people and shove them back in when done. They are very comfortable to wear and not noticeable by others. I paid $150, but you have to make sure they are formed small and not formed to the outside of your ears if you want them to be inconspicuous. As I said, I really feel for you and wish there was an easy fix. Surround yourself with people that really care for you. You don't deserve this T, but you deserve to be cared for.

It really is - and I hate that it makes me feel resentful towards people that do such loud things when they don't have to be so loud. And it feels like sometimes everything is too loud to some extent, so irritating... a slightly too loud voice even just gets me so agitated.

I'm so sorry to hear that you've been struggling so much with it. Tinnitus progressively getting worse no matter what you do, that's just absolutely devastating... we need if not a cure, then a decent treatment at least. What was yours caused by originally? Do you have hearing loss? Any good days/moments? I truly hope it eases for you soon. Tinnitus is such a beast of a disease

Custom ear plugs seem like a good idea; I definitely tire of having to adjust my ear plugs all day long so that I can speak without occlusion. I will look into those. Do you find that "regular" loud noises give you spikes?

Thank you for your kind words, we all deserve so much better than having to deal with the incessant ringing and it's associated bullshit!

 

[astaff14]

I wasn't there, and you can still be mad at his reaction, but ass slapping is not quite that loud. Source: slapped a lot of ass

That's probably correct. I was pretty extra sensitive at the time which I'm sure made it seem louder than it really was.

 

[Mark A]

Would you be so kind as to clarify how your tinnitus is different now.

i.e. your older post says you heard it everywhere except the shower as well, but you habituated eventually.

Perhaps you can habituate yet again? Is there a line where one cannot habituate any longer?

I have had two bad spikes since the onset of tinnitus. First was about 18 months ago when my dad was dying of cancer which caused a lot of stress and I had two noise occurrences. Not bad noise, but the only things I could think off. So maybe stress caused it. The spike never went away which made my life a little worse. But I got used to having worse tinnitus. The second spike occurrence a few weeks after returning from vacation this past October. No terrible noise exposures that I could think of, other then a few large waterfalls which were loud, but not enough for me to run for my earplugs. The spike caused a lot of stress, and once again, the stress may have added fuel to the fire. Currently I have mostly bad days. However, recently I had two much better days where I thought OMG, the spike is reducing. Then it just returned high again. It is so loud it makes me feel dizzy. I would describe it as high frequency pitch hiss/tone in both ears, which is always present. In other words, there is no difference anymore when I wear hearing protection or not. The tinnitus is just as loud when I remove earplugs as it was when they were in. Safe level sounds no longer mask it. I am nothing close to habituating and don't know if I can at this high level. I wish I had more answers and wish others did too. What worries me more, is how bad the tinnitus will become as my hearing erodes with age. Which I'm sure it will since my hearing is already badly compromised. I would like to hear from others who may have noise induced tinnitus with some hearing loss regarding aging. Does it get really bad in their 70's, 80's, 90's...? Or does the brain finally ease up on filling the gap? Wishing every Tinnitus sufferer a better life on this Christmas Day. Take care.

 

[dan]

The tinnitus is just as loud when I remove earplugs as it was when they were in. Safe level sounds no longer mask it. I am nothing close to habituating and don't know if I can at this high level. I wish I had more answers and wish others did too.

If you habituate please let me know. Gives us hopeless some hope.
Oh yeah, and Happy Holidays.

 

[PeteJ]

I have had two bad spikes since the onset of tinnitus. First was about 18 months ago when my dad was dying of cancer which caused a lot of stress and I had two noise occurrences. Not bad noise, but the only things I could think off. So maybe stress caused it. The spike never went away which made my life a little worse. But I got used to having worse tinnitus. The second spike occurrence a few weeks after returning from vacation this past October. No terrible noise exposures that I could think of, other then a few large waterfalls which were loud, but not enough for me to run for my earplugs. The spike caused a lot of stress, and once again, the stress may have added fuel to the fire. Currently I have mostly bad days. However, recently I had two much better days where I thought OMG, the spike is reducing. Then it just returned high again. It is so loud it makes me feel dizzy. I would describe it as high frequency pitch hiss/tone in both ears, which is always present. In other words, there is no difference anymore when I wear hearing protection or not. The tinnitus is just as loud when I remove earplugs as it was when they were in. Safe level sounds no longer mask it. I am nothing close to habituating and don't know if I can at this high level. I wish I had more answers and wish others did too. What worries me more, is how bad the tinnitus will become as my hearing erodes with age. Which I'm sure it will since my hearing is already badly compromised. I would like to hear from others who may have noise induced tinnitus with some hearing loss regarding aging. Does it get really bad in their 70's, 80's, 90's...? Or does the brain finally ease up on filling the gap? Wishing every Tinnitus sufferer a better life on this Christmas Day. Take care.

I think it's from noise exposure.

Even if you can't pinpoint what noise and when.

Usually, a trigger noise exposure that led to the tinnitus can be identified but it is more difficult when you have spikes or tinnitus worsens.

Currently, I have multiple tones and it seems like a spike but it's probably the typical worse tinnitus at night.

It's loud and multiple tones and I wish I could sign up for euthanasia or off myself easily, somehow. It is 9/10 and this is 10/10 when it is like this.

This tinnitus severity is insane. I don't know why the brain and ears does this. Why this loud?!?

 

[Digital Doc]

I have had two bad spikes since the onset of tinnitus. First was about 18 months ago when my dad was dying of cancer which caused a lot of stress and I had two noise occurrences. Not bad noise, but the only things I could think off. So maybe stress caused it. The spike never went away which made my life a little worse. But I got used to having worse tinnitus. The second spike occurrence a few weeks after returning from vacation this past October. No terrible noise exposures that I could think of, other then a few large waterfalls which were loud, but not enough for me to run for my earplugs. The spike caused a lot of stress, and once again, the stress may have added fuel to the fire. Currently I have mostly bad days. However, recently I had two much better days where I thought OMG, the spike is reducing. Then it just returned high again. It is so loud it makes me feel dizzy. I would describe it as high frequency pitch hiss/tone in both ears, which is always present. In other words, there is no difference anymore when I wear hearing protection or not. The tinnitus is just as loud when I remove earplugs as it was when they were in. Safe level sounds no longer mask it. I am nothing close to habituating and don't know if I can at this high level. I wish I had more answers and wish others did too. What worries me more, is how bad the tinnitus will become as my hearing erodes with age. Which I'm sure it will since my hearing is already badly compromised. I would like to hear from others who may have noise induced tinnitus with some hearing loss regarding aging. Does it get really bad in their 70's, 80's, 90's...? Or does the brain finally ease up on filling the gap? Wishing every Tinnitus sufferer a better life on this Christmas Day. Take care.

Some waterfalls can be loud. Also, how did you travel for your vacation, and did you use hearing protection? Exposure to bus, trains, airplanes, restaurants, clubs etc during the trip may be a culprit here.

I have also found that stress can definitely increase the tinnitus even without any noise exposure.

Many folks find that their tinnitus increases with the earplugs in as the background sounds get eliminated. You should still be careful to wear the earplugs around loud sounds as otherwise things will get worse.

 

[Mark A]

Some waterfalls can be loud. Also, how did you travel for your vacation, and did you use hearing protection? Exposure to bus, trains, airplanes, restaurants, clubs etc during the trip may be a culprit here.

I have also found that stress can definitely increase the T even without any noise exposure.

Many folks find that their T increases with the earplugs in as the background sounds get eliminated. You should still be careful to wear the earplugs around loud sounds as otherwise things will get worse.

I did wear hearing protection any time I thought it might get too loud during the travel portion, like on the flight and around the airport. I did not wear protection at any waterfalls, but I didn't think it was excessively loud and I didn't hang out close to them for more than maybe 15 to 20 minutes total. I looked at most from a distance of 40 or more yards away. I did not notice problems during the trip, but about two weeks after returning is when I realized the T is way louder than before the trip. This is what is so frustrating. I protect whenever I think noises can harm me, but don't wear protection during safe levels, which is most of the time. And yet, my T is so much worse in the past 18 months. My hearing seems worse too, but I haven't tested lately, so I can't tell if it really is worse or the T is just so loud. I have gone on trips many times over the years with T, and protected myself the same way and never had problems. I also never go into loud venues like clubs, concerts, stadiums, etc. For me, living life with T is bad enough, and not worth risking further damage. But clearly, there is not much more I can do to keep this thing from getting worse.

 

[Mark A]

I think it's from noise exposure.

Even if you can't pinpoint what noise and when.

Usually, a trigger noise exposure that led to the tinnitus can be identified but it is more difficult when you have spikes or tinnitus worsens.

Currently, I have multiple tones and it seems like a spike but it's probably the typical worse tinnitus at night.

It's loud and multiple tones and I wish I could sign up for euthanasia or off myself easily, somehow. It is 9/10 and this is 10/10 when it is like this.

This tinnitus severity is insane. I don't know why the brain and ears does this. Why this loud?!?

Sadly, there are so many of us that feel the same as you describe. There are multiple times every day I wish for an accident, a lightning strike, or whatever. I really don't want to leave this world, but I also don't look forward to life with severe tinnitus. I am at a point were it is on my mind every conscious second every day. But I am also not crazy stressed about it. I have pretty much accepted tinnitus and don't fantasize about cures or miraculous recoveries. I often wonder if I had terminal cancer and was suffering a physically painful existence, would I take tinnitus over cancer? Initially I say yes, but when I'm around those with cancer, and see their suffering, I'm not sure I have the same conclusion. And yet, every time I feel something is wrong with me, I think, yea, maybe it is something terminal. I guess being heroic, brave, and courageous is living with things like severe tinnitus without making our loved ones suffer too much with us. I'm not sure I can do that, but for now, I'm trying every day.

 

[astaff14]

So sorry you're going through this with tinnitus. I hope it eases up for you even a little bit. Don't be afraid to lean on the people you love for support with this though, I don't know how I'd have gotten through the last couple months if not for my boyfriend and my mom helping me.

 

[Flamingo1]

@Mark A Have you been following the Frequency Therapeutics research thread on TT? There IS hope for us tinnitus sufferers. Stay strong my friend.

 

[Mark A]

@Mark A Have you been following the Frequency Therapeutics research thread on TT? There IS hope for us tinnitus sufferers. Stay strong my friend.

I read a few pages of the thread you suggested. It doesn't change my mind one bit about not following these threads since seeing lots of promises, no meaningful breakthroughs, and eventually moving on to other studies stresses me out. There is so much speculation, arguments, wishful thinking, anger, etc. in these threads, that unless I hear a breakthrough in the mainstream news, it is nothing more than decades of false promises and wishful thinking. Hoping and praying for a cure will eventually destroy me. Don't get me wrong, I want that to happen more than anything in the world, but I can only wish for so long. For me, accepting and adapting to it is my best path forward. If a cure/breakthrough ever happens, obviously, I would be on cloud nine celebrating life for ever.

 

[PeteJ]

How old are you if I can ask? I am asking because I find terrifying if tinnitus severity doesn't improve and I have to worry about staying the same or worsening.

Our health worsens as we get older and I think a stroke, heart attack or some brain condition with this fucking tinnitus volume and severity remaining after a medical or health impact is incredibly scary.

I don't even foresee lasting that long but failing at a suicide attempt has me equally worried.

 

[Mark A]

How old are you if I can ask? I am asking because I find terrifying if tinnitus severity doesn't improve and I have to worry about staying the same or worsening.

Our health worsens as we get older and I think a stroke, heart attack or some brain condition with this fucking tinnitus volume and severity remaining after a medical or health impact is incredibly scary.

I don't even foresee lasting that long but failing at a suicide attempt has me equally worried.

I would rather not say, but I am two years into my third full career. I planned to retire years ago, but this damn tinnitus will not allow me to relax, so the show must goes on. I go to the gym every morning and work over 50 hours a week. I'm sure no one can say if your tinnitus will get better or worse, but it certainly can't get better if you don't take care of yourself. Not an easy thing to do when you feel helpless, but do it anyways, it just may be worth it.

 

[PeteJ]

How do you work? Do you consider your tinnitus extremely loud - like how people describe it as 9/10 severity or worse - loud enough it isn't masked outside etc.? How many tones and how do you describe the pitch?

I don't know if I could work in a quiet setting or preferably at home but anything I do is hell because the tinnitus is always intrusive and loud. I don't believe people with it this bad work or they struggle with it all the time. I would be worried that I would be at the edge of quitting all the time.

I can't get normal sleep times so work at home seems like the only option but that's difficult to get. I guess you know why I asked for your age - it's not important for an answer. I think you understood my point. Right?

 

[Ed209]

How do you work? Do you consider your tinnitus extremely loud - like how people describe it as 9/10 severity or worse - loud enough it isn't masked outside etc.? How many tones and how do you describe the pitch?

In my case, Pete, I had no choice but to work because I'm self-employed. I have screaming loud multi-tonal tinnitus that can be clearly heard outside, and when it first hit this volume it made me physically sick and I became severely traumatised. I remember having a week or so off and then I had to return to work even though I was desperate not to. If I didn't, I'd have been both destitute and physically tormented at the same time as I have many bills to pay. After some time, I came to the conclusion that going to work was a blessing in disguise as it was a distraction. Sitting at home and ruminating all day would have totally destroyed me, but if I'd have had a choice at the time, I'd have taken a long time off for sure. I didn't have a choice though. Statutory sick pay in this country is only circa £60 a week and that is obviously nowhere near enough to pay my mortgage and all of my bills which are in the thousands every month.

I understand the struggle, as it nearly ruined me completely. I was so deeply depressed that I couldn't see a way out at all. It's hard to put into words just how badly I was suffering and that is exactly why I wanted to try and help others who were in the same position I was in.

I never ever want to feel like that again in my entire life.

 

[Mark A]

How do you work? Do you consider your tinnitus extremely loud - like how people describe it as 9/10 severity or worse - loud enough it isn't masked outside etc.? How many tones and how do you describe the pitch?

Pete, When I first was hit with tinnitus almost 5 years ago, I was well established in my job and had a lot of leeway. I still worked, but was maybe 30% productive for a few months. That was very helpful. I eventually clawed back up to the high intensity of my work. I found staying engaged at work distracted me from obsessing about tinnitus. It was rough, but as Ed mentioned above, it was actually a blessing to work hard which helped me get used to tinnitus or habituate. I think at the time it was significant for me to know that I could live with it. Although the intensity was not as bad as it is today, I am working through it much better then when it started. I always could hear it. I never had any reprieve, but could mildly mask it during the day. Today, I can't mask it at all. I have the high pitched hiss and tones. It changes more to the screeching tones when I stress about it, lack sleep, too much noise, or about anything that is not good for me. I still have low productivity days at work that can last for weeks, but I get through it and make up for it when I get back on track. Each time I feel like I just can't do this anymore, but I always make it back. At night, it seems about the same as when it started since even mild tinnitus in a quiet area is loud. It is the daytime that bothers me most since I hear it loud all the time. My sleep has not been that good with tinnitus. I average around 5.5 hours of sleep per night. Some nights I get 3 hours. I have not been able to do much about that. I think I fall asleep more quickly and sleep more soundly by being exhausted at the end of the day. For me the biggest loss from tinnitus is not being able to relax and just sit quietly or enjoy waking up. As soon as I rest and do nothing, the tinnitus drives me nuts and I have to get up to do things.

At the beginning, I was in really bad shape. I too wanted to escape this problem and quickly leave this planet. But I eventually found more times than not that I love life. I will still have awful days, but good days keep coming. Accepting and living with tinnitus takes a lot of courage. And I mean a lot of courage!

 

[PeteJ]

Daytime is bad, I agree but also night. I don't know how I can work with this. I think about learning coding or something but assuming I can concentrate for that by some miracle, how long will it take until I even find employment?

I just think it's hopeless. My ear also has discomfort that changes to excruciating pain at times.

What work do you do?

I don't like going anywhere for any length of time nevermind an 8 hour day somewhere.

My ear and particularly the muscles below at the joint suddenly hurt a lot as I am typing this. My dentist thinks it's a muscle problem. So, how on earth do I work with this shit?!?

 

[Mark A]

Daytime is bad, I agree but also night. I don't know how I can work with this. I think about learning coding or something but assuming I can concentrate for that by some miracle, how long will it take until I even find employment?

I just think it's hopeless. My ear also has discomfort that changes to excruciating pain at times.

What work do you do?

I don't like going anywhere for any length of time nevermind an 8 hour day somewhere.

My ear and particularly the muscles below at the joint suddenly hurt a lot as I am typing this. My dentist thinks it's a muscle problem. So, how on earth do I work with this shit?!?

Hi Pete, it was hard to work with it for the first few months, but eased over time. At about two to three years, I would say I was so used to the tinnitus and consumed by work, there was actually a two week time frame that I didn't think of my tinnitus once. But that was short lived when I was either exposed to a little too much noise or stress. Can't say what for sure. My tinnitus has deteriorated since, and I am struggling a lot lately. My work has suffered from it over the past month, but I plan to focus on work once again when I return January 6.
I have been working in IT for the past three years which has so many disciplines baked into it. It can be quite fascinating. It is not just programming, servers, networking, and security, but it is also about learning industry best practices and implementing it. Knowing how to architect an environment and selecting from the endless swarm of vendors who all claim to be the best is like putting a complex jigsaw puzzle together. If you enjoy it, it will consume you. It takes a lot of study, concentration, and experience, but once good at it, very rewarding. Same thing for coding, but you also have to be really good at understanding how your product and work integrates into the environments it will be used in to be successful. The most important thing is to go down a path you think you will be interested in and not bored. Just writing this helped me forget I have tinnitus, all while it is raging away. Pete, it takes a lot of courage to create and live a productive life when you have tinnitus.

 

[PeteJ]

Hi Pete, it was hard to work with it for the first few months, but eased over time. At about two to three years, I would say I was so used to the tinnitus and consumed by work, there was actually a two week time frame that I didn't think of my tinnitus once. But that was short lived when I was either exposed to a little too much noise or stress. Can't say what for sure. My tinnitus has deteriorated since, and I am struggling a lot lately. My work has suffered from it over the past month, but I plan to focus on work once again when I return January 6.
I have been working in IT for the past three years which has so many disciplines baked into it. It can be quite fascinating. It is not just programming, servers, networking, and security, but it is also about learning industry best practices and implementing it. Knowing how to architect an environment and selecting from the endless swarm of vendors who all claim to be the best is like putting a complex jigsaw puzzle together. If you enjoy it, it will consume you. It takes a lot of study, concentration, and experience, but once good at it, very rewarding. Same thing for coding, but you also have to be really good at understanding how your product and work integrates into the environments it will be used in to be successful. The most important thing is to go down a path you think you will be interested in and not bored. Just writing this helped me forget I have tinnitus, all while it is raging away. Pete, it takes a lot of courage to create and live a productive life when you have tinnitus.

Thanks for the reply. I think it might be the only job I could do (at home helps) but I would be starting from scratch. I am familiar with computers and used Linux when I had a computer but now I would be learning this stuff with screaming tinnitus impacting my focus as I try to learn. :-(

 

[Mark A]

Thanks for the reply. I think it might be the only job I could do (at home helps) but I would be starting from scratch. I am familiar with computers and used Linux when I had a computer but now I would be learning this stuff with screaming tinnitus impacting my focus as I try to learn. :-(

I completely understand. All these technical careers require a fair amount of concentration. College is best, but from what I see many get training online, take classes for certifications, etc. There are many universities that give free enrollment online, but charge only if you want credit for the class. One is edX. Since You are still fairly new to tinnitus, it can still take more time to habituate or get used to it. It was two years for me initially. So maybe it will get easier for you to concentrate as time goes on.