Yeah I am almost certain that certain synaptic processes in the major cells in the brainstem were damaged. The structure of the cells do not understand how to process naturally anymore after being overwhelmed and attacked by the antagonistic function of the chemicals in the antidepressants. These antidepressants worked exactly how they are supposed to, they stop the re-absorption of serotonin (& norepinephrine in my case). The synapse is now permanently altered. The lesions made to the neurotransmitters to kill the reabsorption IS BRAIN DAMAGED, except we are the unlucky ones who had a massive amount of the drug antagonists destroy too many synapses. Now these brain cells are like dying flies buzzing around not knowing how to fly straight because of the damage/learning how to handle extreme amounts of these chemicals.
I wish I could resist the idea of suicide, but luckily I have been preparing to end my life for over a decade, cutting off connections with friends, making sure I have a place to keep the valuable stuff of my family so they can get it without headaches. That's why I gave into trying an antidepressant, and in just 24 days of taking Pristiq 50 mg, it gave me permanent severe tinnitus. I know that this will never go away, since I would have never had it if I didn't take the drug, And, since I took the drug for a short amount of time I know it's not withdrawal, it is 100% dysfunction in my brainstem's cells. It's almost like pop rocks sitting on the surface of my brainstem where the auditory cortex is just firing sporadically and without any sign of stopping.
This condition is a really heavy hit when I had already struggled with my thoughts and negative emotions. Tinnitus was like the last thing I could have expected and if I knew what tinnitus was before I took the antidepressant, I would have stopped hopefully sooner, but my doctor never told me anything, and the propaganda is that it "takes a month to start working."
Basically I'm just waiting to see if it does go away before I end it for good. But again, it would have gone away if it wasn't permanent damage.
EDIT:
I'm actually changing my theory again back to the original thought of ototoxicity, specifically
cochleotoxicity. In my case my ears were poisoned quickly. My doctor prescribed me Pristiq 50 mg, the standard dose, after I told her that I was sensitive, and didn't want an SSRI. I've read numerous reviews from years ago about how others have had this doctor not listen to them. This is again all so unfortunate because it could have been avoided. Every day I get more sick with depression because I can't find the right help, and when I tried to help my depression with an antidepressant, it made things significantly worse. How ironic; antidepressant added tinnitus to my depression.
Here is a link on the effects of ototoxicity, something I had suspected happened, but was denied by my doctor, as expected because she is very incompetent.
Ototoxic Adverse Drug Reactions: A Disproportionality Analysis Using the Italian Spontaneous Reporting Database
The damage is the exact same as loud noise damage,
cochleotoxicity cause the cells in the ear to bend and cells holding those hairs are damaged. That's why I had pain and pressure in my ears for months, and would pop them 40 times a day for over a year. Now my tinnitus has reduced from excruciating exercises, mainly long distance running, and eating well as I have always done. But the damage to my inner ear hair cells is permanent, until they find a cure, but they won't. My doctor ruined my life by prescribing me the medication, and I ruined my life by taking it. I am so helpless and hopeless because I SHOULD NEVER HAVE TAKEN IT.