I Think This Is the End for Me

[bill 112]

I think I have reached my limit, as bad as my H and T were they are now at least 10 times worse since my audiogram, YES an audiogram has made me worse!

My whole face stings and pains me to the point of blanking out, the right side of my face feels like I'm having a stroke with extreme pain and pressure followed by extreme migraines! My mother even called an ambulance for me as she was that worried about the extreme pain I am in. I can't tolerate any sound, even just my breathing causes my face and ear to lock up in pressurised electrical pain that's just unbearable.

I'm heavily considering ending it, my only salvation was being able to visit my grandmother for tea everyday and now I can't bear to even walk up to see her! I can't go on I just can't , all I do is worsen myself and to think I was feeling better too! And now this? What do I do? I was already in a dark place and now this unexpected hell has knocked me into the deepest pits of it.

I am so scared! This is unimaginable!!

 

[Michael Leigh]

Sorry to hear you're not in a good place at the moment @bill 112 and only hope that things get better for you. Try having a word with your GP.
All the best
Michael

 

[JasonP]

That's horrible. Are you taking any medications? If so which ones?

 

[Rubenslash]

In a couple of days you are going to Thailand isn't it? For the stem cell treatment..

 

[MarioT]

Shit dude, this sounds horrible! I am having a bad period as well but not anywhere as near as what you are describing.

You need to calm down your nervous system a.s.a.p. Can you sleep? Do you have any tranquilizers? If you are experiencing real pain, you should go to the doctor asap. Maybe skip the GP and go to a neurologist directly.

Your body is in a state of shock right now, that is why your H is over the roof!

Hold in there, it will settle down again in time.

All the best!

 

[lymebite]

Very sorry to hear how bad it has got. And from an audiogram, that is just unreal.

I know meds can be a double edged sword and sometimes make things worse but considering your extreme pain might be worth trying something at this point.

I hope it gets a little better. We are all pulling for you.

 

[JasonP]

I think I have reached my limit, as bad as my H and T were they are now at least 10 times worse since my audiogram, YES an audiogram has made me worse!

My whole face stings and pains me to the point f blanking out, the right side of my face feels like I'm having a stroke with extreme pain and pressure followed by extreme migraines! My mother even called an ambulance for me as she was that worried about the extreme pain I am in. I can't tolerate any sound, even just my breathing causes my face and ear to lock up in pressurised electrical pain that's just unbearable.

I'm heavily considering ending it, my only salvation was being able to visit my grandmother for tea everyday and now I can't bear to even walk up to see her! I can't go on I just can't , all I do is worsen myself and to think I was feeling better too! And now this? What do I do? I was already in a dark place and now this unexpected hell has knocked me into the deepest pits of it.

I am so scared! This is unimaginable!!

Since you are sufferin so much I wanted to ask you if you have ever talked to a doctor to see if Neurontin would help. I have no idea what to recommend. I found this on the internet:

http://www.chat-hyperacusis.net/post/neurontin-reduction-in-hyperacusis-4266574

 

[Ed209]

I think I have reached my limit, as bad as my H and T were they are now at least 10 times worse since my audiogram, YES an audiogram has made me worse!

My whole face stings and pains me to the point of blanking out, the right side of my face feels like I'm having a stroke with extreme pain and pressure followed by extreme migraines! My mother even called an ambulance for me as she was that worried about the extreme pain I am in. I can't tolerate any sound, even just my breathing causes my face and ear to lock up in pressurised electrical pain that's just unbearable.

I'm heavily considering ending it, my only salvation was being able to visit my grandmother for tea everyday and now I can't bear to even walk up to see her! I can't go on I just can't , all I do is worsen myself and to think I was feeling better too! And now this? What do I do? I was already in a dark place and now this unexpected hell has knocked me into the deepest pits of it.

I am so scared! This is unimaginable!!

Bill, I'm really sad to see you this way. There's not much that can be said on a forum, so I'd suggest seeking emergency help. I know this is probably stating the obvious, but have you had any meaningful investigative tests done? MRI, EEG, blood tests etc

The description of your symptoms go beyond tinnitus. Any kind of stinging or tingling pain can point towards nerve compression. Are you absolutely sure there's no underlying cause that can be treated? Have you ruled TMJ out?

 

[Amber]

@bill 112 are you going to cancel the reserved stem cell op? Did you ever book it? Is this a cover up story for you to have an explanation why you're not going? Am I cynical?

Please don't follow in the steps of Nathalie and post a topic, impersonating your brother, telling everyone you have killed yourself.

For immediate relief of your horrible symptoms, go to a psychiatric ward. They can administer you medications to make you feel numb and sleepy. Please feel better soon.

P.S. Everyone, does this whole story have "crazy" written all over it? Audiogram can't cause this bad worsening. @bill 112, have you considered this might all be the product of your vivid imagination? Don't be offended I ask the question others dare not...

 

[Foncky]

What happened exactly ?

 

[bill 112]

Bill, I'm really sad to see you this way. There's not much that can be said on a forum, so I'd suggest seeking emergency help. I know this is probably stating the obvious, but have you had any meaningful investigative tests done? MRI, EEG, blood tests etc

The description of your symptoms go beyond tinnitus. Any kind of stinging or tingling pain can point towards nerve compression. Are you absolutely sure there's no underlying cause that can be treated? Have you ruled TMJ out?

I have done every test known to man Ed all coming back clear, MRIs, CAT scans you name it I've done it all.

This was triggered by a sudden loud noise in March 2016, it backed off a little and I tried to resume a semi normal life with hearing protection but I just got worse and worse to the point where I worsened in December 2016.
I slowly improved a little to the point where I could barely function, I went for my high freq audiogram 6 days ago and it was way louder than I would have liked, the sounds stabbed my ear and head in extreme pain and it's gotten even worse since then. I had all sorts of weird T spikes on my way home and now my T and H are just on a whole other level, non survivable levels at this point.

 

[Ed209]

I'd really go and see someone and get to the bottom of what's happening. It sounds like a compressed nerve to me, but I'm no expert, which is why I'd get help ASAP.

Another possibility is extreme anxiety: http://www.anxietycentre.com/anxiety-symptoms/burning-skin-on-face.shtml

 

[bill 112]

What happened exactly ?

She played high frequency sounds for my high frequency audiogram, the sounds were way louder than I expected them to be, ear stabbing brain meltingly painful.

 

[bill 112]

@bill 112 are you going to cancel the reserved stem cell op? Did you ever book it? Is this a cover up story for you to have an explanation why you're not going? Am I cynical?

Please don't follow in the steps of Nathalie and post a topic, impersonating your brother, telling everyone you have killed yourself.

For immediate relief of your horrible symptoms, go to a psychiatric ward. They can administer you medications to make you feel numb and sleepy. Please feel better soon.

P.S. Everyone, does this whole story have "crazy" written all over it? Audiogram can't cause this bad worsening. @bill 112, have you considered this might all be the product of your vivid imagination? Don't be offended I ask the question others dare not...

If anything this has reinforced my going for Stemcell treatment, if I had any doubts before they no longer matter, I can't just sit and wait this one out, there's simply no way.

 

[Sam Bridge]

These symptoms are well beyond tinnitus like Ed said, get your self to your GP quick.

 

[Ed209]

She played high frequency sounds for my high frequency audiogram, the sounds were way louder than I expected them to be, ear stabbing brain meltingly painful.

Did she not raise the sounds from silence until audible?

 

[bill 112]

Did she not raise the sounds from silence until audible?

No she done the opposite I think, the sounds came on and were loud, I asked her to stop after like the second frequency.

She walked in and told me that those sounds were actually at minus decibels but they still sounded far too loud and painful. I have a frequency generator on my phone and they don't sound anywhere near as loud as what came out of the headset this I don't understand.

 

[Ed209]

Can you be certain it's not anxiety Bill? I noticed this happened both times whilst you were seeing an audiologist. There's a chance it could be psychosomatic, which can produce very real physical problems.

If you believe an audiogram has damaged you before, than you may have had an intense psychological reaction to having another. It can't be ruled out, but I'd still suggest taking yourself to a hospital as soon as possible.

I truly hope you can resolve whatever is happening to you.

 

[slipware]

@bill 112

Oh my goodness you're describing my symptoms almost exactly. I don't have H, but tinnitus off the scale, face feels like it's in a vice, etc. I had a TIA and I suspect mine is nerve damage, but it really is made worse by the stress I'm feeling over a heart condition. I've never felt it's the end though, as bad as it is. Please see GP, maybe sonething to ease the feeling of darkness. Good luck.

 

[Rubenslash]

If anything this has reinforced my going for Stemcell treatment, if I had any doubts before they no longer matter, I can't just sit and wait this one out, there's simply no way.

When are you leaving? I thought you had booked for next week?

 

[bill 112]

Can you be certain it's not anxiety Bill? I noticed this happened both times whilst you were seeing an audiologist. There's a chance it could be psychosomatic, which can produce very real physical problems.

If you believe an audiogram has damaged you before, than you may have had an intense psychological reaction to having another. It can't be ruled out, but I'd still suggest taking yourself to a hospital as soon as possible.

I truly hope you can resolve whatever is happening to you.

I don't believe it's Psychosomatic Ed, these are real symptoms that are out of my control, trust me I'm 100% certain this is pshyological at this point.

When I had my noise exposure in March, I didn't freak out or worry, I told myself it couldn't possibly do any damage and carried on with my day until the following evening when these symptoms appeared. I couldn't tolerate the shower anymore and my whole head would sting and burn along with my neck and body as a result.
Completely freaked out at this point and came to the conclusion that I had done some form of damage and rushed to the E.R to which I got little or no help. It just progressed from there as a direct consequence of sound and sound only. I sat in my house for nearly four months after that just watching tv and playing video games to help cheer me up and I did improve to a degree. I then tried to return to work in August with the aid of earplugs and after a few weeks I had to give up as the pain was just too much. Everytime this pain increased so did my T and my tolerance to sound would plummet along with it.

With enough rest the pain would back off and things would improve again, in October it was my anniversary with my girlfriend and we booked a quite night away in a hotel not far from here.
I wore my earmuffs and earplugs the entire time and later in the night we went for dinner, we walked around until we found somewhere that wasn't too loud and had dinner.
Upon returning to our hotel room I became overwhelmed in this stinging electrical nerve pain so much so that I couldn't sleep or do anything, I was overwhelmed by the pain.

I stayed in bed for almost two weeks when I got home until I recovered somewhat. At this point I no longer knew what to do, obviously the hearing protection was simply doing nothing to help me whatsoever. By November I was feeling ok again, I had a dental appointment which was a nightmare and then followed by some Christmas shopping to get my family Christmas presents which didn't happen as it just became too much. I then had my haircut, went to bed and woke up with much louder T, more pain and increased H. Sound is killing my ears, obviously going to the store or other things is simply too much for my ears even with hearing protection.

 

[Ed209]

I'd probably seek out some of the best hearing specialists in the country at this point.

Psychosomatic issues can be pretty serious which is why I brought it up. I remember reading a lot about this sort of stuff years back. There's an article that sticks out in my mind and it was this one:http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/boo...range-phenomenon-psychosomatic-illnesses.html

I know your symptoms are real which is why I'm trying to think of every possibility, considering the tests you've had. I think you need second or third opinions.

 

[Jake007]

Hang in there bill, don't give up we are all pulling for ya

 

[bill 112]

I don't think I can fight anymore, too much has happened, I've lost too much at this point and I just can't handle it anymore.

No matter how careful I am something always sneaks up on me and destroys my ears, everytime I get happy something happens and worsens me further and further to the point that I no longer feel like living, I have nothing to live for anymore, nothing to look forward to or feel happy about.

It's just 24/7 misery, sorrow, grief, pain, suffering just everything bad imaginable. I just don't know what to do anymore, I just dream of my old life and it seems so far out of reach now that I'll never ever see it again. Why live my life like this, I can't go back and change things and that's all I wish for.

I don't want to die but living like this is just too much.

 

[Stakovic]

Sorry Bill,the scientific community told you go home ,you will habituate it

 

[Jake007]

You still have the stem cell treatment in your pocket, keep fighting. Sending prayers your way brother.

 

[Samantha R]

@Amber
No, I don't think Bill's story is crazy at all.
bill 112 is obviously suffering from a very extreme form of hyperacusis. Very rare, but very real. There have been a couple of similar cases on this board in the past - that is with extreme pain and intolerance to sound in general.
He has posted many times about his difficulties, I can't even imagine how he must be feeling.
@bill 112 - stay strong and don't give up. You are not done yet.

 

[Penate]

Is unbelievable how long we have to keep suffering from this evil horrendous condition, I'm sorry for you I'm praying every day for us look like god is the only solution, I feel your pain I'm in the darkness for long time now, this is ridiculous 2017 and still NOTHING.Only speculation, and nobody knows nothing at all.

 

[Andrea Lopez]

Bill, I'm having an extremely rough day myself.... clouded with the same dark thoughts you're having.

But you do have the stem cell treatment around the corner. Maybe it will help you and what if you don't try and see that day?

 

[GregCA]

Hang in there. You're trying something new and advanced soon, so that's exciting and a glimpse of hope.