I've had tinnitus for more than 7 years. Only thing that helps is alcohol, pain medication, loud music and sleep.
Welcome
@Odell . I am sorry that the sources of relief you can find are alcohol and medication. I am certain you would agree that they are not the best choice, but I understand the desperation caused by the tinnitus that would drive you towards such "solutions".
Have you visited the "Success Stories" section of this forum? There is an
interesting post that has details on a habituation method that seems to have helped a number of people. Perhaps it may provide some relief for you.
I live with extreme tinnitus. Doesn't go away, does not change 24-7. I feel like I'm being punished by GOD for everything I have ever done in the past. It's changed my attitude and made me become someone I don't even like to be around.
This is more common that you think. I believe most of us who suffer from tinnitus experience it 24/7. And I have entertained the thought that the universe was working against me (I still do for other things that are going to happen in my life). But, tinnitus is just an affliction. It is not cast upon someone by a malevolent universe or deity as punishment for your past deeds. It just happens. Sometimes due to an illness, exposure to loud sounds, or some of up were just born with it.
It is miserable, it is exasperating, and it can cause severe depression. Those things, which result from the tinnitus, can cause changes in one's behavior and can turn them into someone that they do not want to be. Some here have become recluses, others find themselves lashing out against loved ones. Tinnitus can seem like torture to the suffer, it can be traumatic; when a person suffers a traumatic experiences, that person will be effected.
The good news is that you realize that your attitude has been effected by this. That is great. It also indicates that you remember the person you were prior to the change. Will you are working, hopefully with the assistance of a doctor and possibly psychological counseling (to help with the attitude changes and the root cause of them) you can pay attention to your actions and catch yourself when you act out of character. The fact that you recognize that you attitude has changed is probably a good indicator that you can get your old self back.
I would recommend seeking psychological counseling. It seems that your tinnitus is causing you significant distress and perhaps some cognitive, psycho-dynamic, or other style of counseling may help you with that distress and, as a result, help you recover the version of yourself prior to the attitude change.
I wish you luck in your journey, and hope you find what you need. I also hope that you can find better methods of dealign with the tinnitus other than alcohol and drugs. Many in my family have died due to alcohol and drugs, and I am always concerned when people turn to those during hard times.